I made a new friend. His name is Jack. He's my age, a bit older, but not by much. Few weeks, I'd say. Right now, we're packing up for our trip. I met Jack when Charon, Roy and I were heading back to the tower. Kind of picked him up on the way, really. Ran into him just wandering aimlessly in the desert, like he was lost. When I talked to him, he told me he was trying to get north. Well, if you're walking my way, I'll walk with you.

Took him back to the tower, and we've been doing random shit for caps to pay for all we'll need. He's pretty nice, I mean, I like him anyways. He makes me laugh, and he's pretty handsome. He's got short black hair, some five o'clock shadow, and bright green eyes. Not really sure how else to describe him. Looks a bit like Butch, but hardened, more knowledgeable and capable in the Capital Wasteland. He carries a shotgun, like I used to, till I got this Magnum.

It's been two weeks, and we're itching to get a move on. We're leaving tomorrow morning, hopefully, if all goes well. He keeps telling me he's going to take me away from this place, and we'll find the green fields. At first, he was just going north for the sake of going north. Once I told him why I was going north, though, he agreed to come along with me. If you ask me, I think Jack's taken a liking to me. He follows me everywhere, and even introduced himself to Charon.

Of course, when I told him my history with Charon, he flinched…a lot. But he's the first guy, person, I've let myself get close to in a long time. Aside from Gob, that is. And Charon. I don't know why, but I just feel safe, comfortable with Jack. Maybe it's because he can really make me laugh, and I don't laugh enough. Hell aside from the slight flinching, he didn't really seem affected when I told him about Charon. Just said it was an interesting story, really.

"You have everything set?"

Jack asks as we sit in the lobby of Tenpenny Tower. Our new pack is in front of me, filled with a mixture of things, both mine and his. He's going to carry it.

"Uh, yeah I think so. You?"

He nods. I feel kind of bad for Jack. Roy won't give him a place to sleep, so he's been sleeping in the chairs in the lobby. Gob, surprisingly, doesn't like him either. Something about the way he looks at me. It doesn't matter, though. Jack makes me laugh, and I like that. It just sucks because I get a warm bed in Gob's apartment, and he gets a chair.

"Yeah I have it all covered. Just making sure you're set. You seem pretty scatter-brained sometimes."

I laugh at Jack, punching him playfully in the arm.

"Shut up, dick."

He laughs, and flinches at my punch. I smile at him, and he sighs.

"Hey I'm gonna get some rest. You should uh, go and get some too. And tie up loose ends."

I cock an eyebrow at him as I light a cigarette.

"Loose ends?"

I ask, blowing smoke in the air. The one thing I made sure I was in full stock of, is cigarettes. I have about three or four cartons shoved inside that pack, and a few handfuls of lighters, too. I always seem to lose mine…

"You know…maybe you should talk to Charon…tell him you're leaving."

I nearly choke on the smoke in my throat as I try to make rings with it. I haven't spoken to Charon since we got to the tower, and he sure as hell doesn't know I'm leaving, let alone leaving with Jack. Gob's the only one who knows, and he swore a sacred vow he would not tell.

"What? Why?"

The fact that Jack is actually suggesting this shocks me. Jack shrugs, playing with his hands in his lap.

"Well…because you two have a lot of history together. Leaving without saying goodbye seems kind of…stupid."

I roll my eyes and stand up. I don't want to think about Charon, let alone talk to him. After what happened with him on the boat and in Point Lookout, I'm all set.

"Thanks, maybe I will. Night."

I wave to Jack as I head outside. I feel like being alone, getting some fresh air and whatnot. I shut the doors behind me, and slowly walk out into the courtyard. The moon illuminates everything, making it look creepy and romantic all at once. I smile at it. Tonight, is the last night I will ever see this place again. It's the last night I ever plan on spending in the Capital Wasteland, and the last night I'll ever be around so many ghouls. I should enjoy this moment.

So I do. I clear my head, and take everything in. I look around, then close my eyes. Sniffing, I make a mental note to always remember the distinct smell of Tenpenny Tower. Like people, places have their own scent, too. I smile, just a bit, as I open my eyes. The stars twinkle, the moon is bright, the air is cool. I don't know how it'll be up north, but hell I'm happy to wonder. Not knowing is half the fun, isn't it? I think it is. Hell I have a new lease right now. I have a new friend, who actually likes my company, and I have a whole new adventure waiting for me. There's nothing really to frown about.

"Dez?"

Except, maybe that. I wince, as I turn around to see Charon. I've been avoiding him since we got here, and I'm in no mood to see him now.

"What?"

But what can I do now, run? Instead I stand there, smoking, and watch as he comes over to me. The only time I've seen him lately, is when Lily and him are conjoined at the hip and parading around the tower. The only time he's seen me, is when I let him, and when I'm with Jack. This time, we're both alone.

"What are you doing out here so late?"

He asks like it's his goddamn business.

"Why do you care? I can do what I want."

"True, just curious."

He stands next to me, but not looking at me. Instead, we stare at the front gate to the tower. It's an awkward silence…and I figure I'll take Jack's advice. Turning towards Charon, I narrow my eyes, and suck in a deep breath of air.

"I'm leaving in the morning with Jack."

It comes out so fast, I'm not really sure if Charon hears it. But by the look on his face, I can tell he does.

"What? Are you kidding me? When was this decided?"

"A few days ago."

I tell him, nonchalantly.

"Dez you can't take off with him. You don't even know him!"

Throwing out my smoke, I rub it into the decrepit concrete with my boot and cross my arms.

"I know him. Well enough to know he won't hurt me anyways."

"And you were going to leave without telling me, weren't you?"

I shrug, not letting his slight anger get to me. The night is too pretty to let it.

"Well you seemed to have your hands full with Lily."

I'm referring to the time I saw them playing tonsil hockey in the lobby like they were in their own damn room. I'm sure he doesn't know I saw that, though.

"You should have told me sooner, Dez."

"Why?"

He shakes his head.

"Maybe so I could have had time…to…"

"To do what?"

"I don't know, say goodbye?"

"Goodbye, Charon. See, no time involved. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to walk around outside these gates one last time."

I turn away from him, and begin walking towards the gate. Believe me, it's really hard to be mean to him, to turn away and up and leave like this, but I have to. I have to let it go, really. Charon and I are in the past. Despite what happened two weeks ago, we're not much of anything anymore. Even though…I wanted us to be.

I slip out the gate, and to my utter annoyance, Charon follows.

"Dez, are you seriously going to leave?"

I turn around, baring my teeth at him.

"Yes, and you're not stopping me."

"I'm not trying to. I'm trying to figure out why the hell you want to chase a pipe dream."

I cross my eyes, and lean up against the fence.

"Because I can't sit here and watch you suck-face with Lily all the damn time. If you're not man enough to leave her, you're not man enough for me."

Charon shakes his head in bewilderment. I think my sentence makes perfect sense.

"Man enough to leave my family for another woman?"

"The other woman who happens to be someone you used to care a lot about."

"I still…"

"Don't even go there."

I snap before he can even finish his sentence. I don't want to hear it. I don't want to hear what he has to say because I have a plan. I'm leaving tomorrow, and that's final. He can't fuck this up for me.

"Dez…"

He mutters, shaking his head.

"It's your fault. You won't leave Lily, and I told you I wasn't waiting forever."

"But leaving with some guy you just met? That's insane."

"He's taking me away! He's taking me away from this place, from this world, and from you. We're going to find those green areas, and we're going to be happy!"

Charon smirks, shaking his head.

"And what? Live happily ever after in an imaginary world? Really smart, Dez."

"Say what you want, but that place is real. I know it is. And yes, happily ever after."

"Stupid…"

"It's only stupid because you're mad you didn't try to do it first."

I tell him, pointing at him in blame. Charon steps forward, knocking my hand away from him.

"You left me, Dez. Don't think it's the other way around."

"I don't! It turned out to be the best damn thing I did, too!"

"Excuse me?"

He asks, a bit shocked. I kick myself from the fence, and push him back.

"Because of you, I spent five years dealing with shit I didn't need! Because of you, and your stupid shit I spend five years of nights crying over you! I didn't deserve it! I didn't deserve you fucking letting me go! You did this to yourself!"

Charon gets mad, and shoves me back against the fence, holding me in place.

"You leaving with some man doesn't constitute what I did five years ago. You are being stupid, foolish, and impulsive. You could get hurt, Dez!"

Tears of anger rush up on me, and I snarl at him.

"I don't care! It's better than watching you dry-hump Lily in the middle of the lobby!"

"I did no such thing!"

"I saw you making out with her!"

"She is my girlfriend. I can do what I want with her."

"It doesn't count if she doesn't even like you, Charon."

Did he forget that just two weeks ago, he was kissing me? Or was that a fake, a front that meant nothing because I was…vulnerable?

"You don't know anything about my relationship."

"What about me then, huh Charon? What happened in Point Lookout? On the boat? What did that mean? Nothing I bet. You were just…filling time until you could get home and fuck her!"

Forcefully, Charon shoves me into the fence again. I wrap my hands around his wrists, looking up at him, sniffing as tears fall. I'm angry. I'm angry because he acted like nothing happened, like it meant nothing. When…when to me it meant everything.

"Don't you think for one second…"

"What? What huh?"

I shout at him, pushing his buttons.

"That you never meant a goddamn thing!"

I stop resisting. I stop struggling against his grip, and look up at him. His face isn't twisted in anger. It's different, really. Something I've never seen before. Something soft, but violent. I have to force myself to look away.

"You act like I didn't."

I mutter, sniffing again. His hands let go of my shoulders, but I feel them, his hands, grab my face. He turns my head towards him, staring into my eyes. Without any hesitation, Charon bends down, his hands still gripping the sides of my head, and kisses me forcefully. At first, I try to pull away, try to fight him off. But…he's stronger, and I really don't want him to stop. He kisses me, the smacking noise our lips make echoes in the distance. It's almost…like he's kissing me goodbye. No, tomorrow I'm leaving, and nothing he can say or do will sway that. Unless he gets rid of Lily and opts to come along. Then…then I'll wonder who Jack even is.

"Don't you ever, for one second, think that anything that happened with us meant nothing."

He tells me, like an adult scolding a child.

"Then why do you do this? Why do you do this to me, but go back to Lily?"

Charon shakes his head, his hands still holding me, his lips just centimeters from mine.

"I don't know…I don't."
"Then you have to stop. If you're not going to, I will."

Struggling, I try to break free of his grip. Try to get out and run back inside, to the warmth and comfort of Gob's apartment. This isn't how I wanted my last night here to be remembered. Charon doesn't let me get free. He moves his feet, quick, fast, putting me back against the fence and kissing me again.

"I can't."

He says in between heated kisses.

"You just like having two women!"

I accuse, trying to shove him off. It doesn't work, though, his brute force better than mine.

"No, Dez."

He says, lifting me up and wrapping my legs around his waist.

"Put me down! Let me go!"

He kisses me again, quieting any arguments I may have had.

"I'm trying, Dez, I'm trying."

He mutters, kissing down the side of my neck.

"Trying what?"

"I don't know…"

His kisses make me shudder, makes me swell with anticipation. I dig my nails into the back of his armor, stifling moans of pleasure.

"Don't leave, Dez. Stay here…we'll figure something out."

He pushes his body into mine. If we weren't fully clothed, we'd be having sex, basically.

"No, no I'm going. Stop it. Stop I know what you're doing…I'm not staying fuck you it won't work."

He ignores me, ignores everything I have to say. He presses his lips against mine again, and you know what? I give up.

"Tell me you'll stay…"

He whispers, almost begging. He holds my up by my upper thighs, it's the first time I'm tall enough to see him eye-to-eye.

"I'll stay, Charon. I'll stay."

Charon kisses me, and it feels like the first time all over again. His hands, my hands, our heavy breathing, it's all there. I fumble for his belt, while he kisses down my neck and fondles my exposed breast. I finally unclasp his belt, as he stifles my moans with more well-timed kisses. His hands are everywhere on me, as I tug down his zipper. He holds me up by balancing me on his waist and on the fence. I don't want him to put me down.

"Charon…"

I moan, his tongue feeling so good against my skin. One of his hands works at my own belt and zipper, while the other strokes up and down my side. Finally, he gets my pants undone, and pauses. He only pauses to pull one of my legs out of my pants, and pins me up against the wall again.

"Are you sure?"

He asks, hesitating, his mouth inches from mine.

"Only if you are."

"I am."

He kisses me, before I can utter a moan as I feel him. I cling to his back, as he lets my mouth go and buries his head into my neck. Between his grunts, and my moans, I remember everything. I remember why I fell in love with him in the first place, why I went back to Fort Bannister, why I came back to the Capital Wasteland. For him, all for him, just for him. I went away, to see if he would chase me, and he didn't. It broke my heart, hurt me in ways I can't even describe, but this time…right now…it doesn't matter.

"Charon…"

I yell in pleasure, just as he kisses me. I feel the rush of finishing, of going to heaven and coming back down, with the one person I've ever given a shit about.

"I love you, Dezbe."

He says, exhausted, as high as I am. I look into his eyes, slowly caressing his cheeks with my hands. I don't say anything back, but I kiss him. I kiss him, as he lets my legs fall back down to the solid ground, as he lets my body slide away. In time…I'll know if he means that, or if the heat of the moment caused him to say it.