Remy wanted to go back home. It wouldn't be easy but tonight she agreed to talk with Allison. Forgetting what happened to her wouldn't work. She had to face it, Allison was right. But the only thought of having a real conversation about this made her feel sick. It wasn't only bad faith. She usually used to deal with things pretending everything was fine and she really had no idea how else she could do, but she promised Cameron she won't run away. Here there were, eating chinese food at Remy's table, quietly. Remy didn't eat much. She was already thinking about the conversation they would have after dinner. Allison, for her part, was letting Remy in her word because it seemed she needed it and to say the truth, Cameron was also anxious. She wondered what was the best way to make this easy for Remy. She knew it wouldn't be easy for her friend to face the reality.

"Let's seat cosily on the couch?"

Remy shook her head.

"Rem first of all, let me tell you something. We have all the time we need, and we don't have to fix everything tonight. I just want to talk about the things I expect you to do.. And most of all, I want to hear what you need. When you feel like it's too much for you, just say it. Don't think it won't happen, because it'll, and it's ok, you just have to let me know and we'll take it slow" Allison was trying to sound reassuring but it didn't seem to work. Remy wasn't looking at her and she was distant…

"I'm already feeling bad Al, just… say what you have to say"

"No." Allison gently but firmly said. Remy was waiting for her to proceed, surprised.

"I'm not in a hurry. Let's relax…. Does your stomach hurt?"

Thirteen nodded.

"You have to do a medical check up. This is the only thing I won't give you a choice on."

Remy took a deep breath. She didn't say anything. Another deep breath and she had to swallow hard to block the tears. "So no more running, right?" Her sad eyes were staring Allison. She tried a smile but it looked more like a sigh.

"Talk to me"

"I'm fine Allie. It's only.. I'm nervous that's all"

"I'm not saying you aren't. But just "stress" like you say is giving you a hard time. I wouldn't be surprised you have some infection or something. You also aborted and we have to see if it's ok. Abortion pill works at 90 percent. I would really feel reassured if you accept to have an examination. And I'm sure, at the end, you will too"

Remy moved from the kitchen table to a seat in her living room.

Allison followed. "tell me"

"It's… I.. don't feel very comfortable with … forget it" Remy's teary eyes were imploring to stop this conversation but Allison had no intention to.

Allison nodded "I can understand that…. But if helps, I can do it… I can do the check up… would you agree if it's me..?"

She shrugged her shoulders. "I guess it's better than with a stranger… but I can't stand it ..if I'm dressed up it's different…" She was suffering, it was evident.

"Tell me honestly, on a scale of 1 to 10, how much was it hurting this afternoon?"

"don't know…" she mumbled.

"Rem! Come on!"

"maybe 9.. 9 and a half"

"Ahm…" How could Remy still hesitate to have a check up if it hurt that bad?

"And now?"

"It's ok now… maybe.. 6"

"Of course, 6 is cool!... I want you to have a look at it… please?"

Remy looked at the worried blonde. "kay….. and then?"

"Let just do this for now…"

"What, now?" Remy asked.

"When ever you feel ready. Tomorrow or the day after… or now!"

"Let's go, then.. if you don't mind" Remy decided that if it has to be done, better soon than thinking about it for two more days.

Allison got up and took Remy's hands, smiling "Come on"

Remy sat on the cold examination table still looking anywhere but at Cameron.

"It's fine… try to imagine what you would do if you were the docto… You just do your job… it's the same for me… let's do it… professionally?"

Remy liked the idea. After all, it was true. This was a regular exam and there was nothing to be embarrassed of.

"You stop me when you want"…

Remy took off her shirt and opened the button of her jeans. It wasn't easy but she promised and she had nothing to lose. Allison began the examination with a palpation. Remy didn't have to tell when it hurt because her face indicated it well enough.

"I'll proceed with the abdominal ultrasound" Cameron applied a gel over Thirteen's abdomen and took the transducer.

"Can I go?"

Remy nodded. She was tensed.

"You need to relax… I'll be quick"

Cameron observed the kidneys, the liver, and the pancreas. "It seems there's nothing wrong with organs" She smiled. "Let's have a look where you feel the biggest pain" Allison pressed again the zone with her hands and Remy had to bite her tongue for not yelling

"Allright…. I need you to hold your breath for a few seconds"

Allison examined the zone under Remy's navel. "You can breathe now" She tried to enlarge the picture on her screen. "Ok do it again". Remy held her breath but the pain was stronger now and she let go "Sorry" "It's ok… can you try to hold your breath for a few more seconds? I'm almost done… seems like you have an ab strain"

"Cool"

"Shhh.. don't talk"

"This is it, abdominal strain. Must have been caused by contraction during the abort and it got worse with … well you are a doctor!" There was no need to remind the nightmares and crying fits.

"and I also don't need to tell you.."

"That it's nothing bad, no I know it, but thanks!" Remy smirked

"The end of my sentence was actually that you can't make effort until you feel the pain.. and then you have to take it very easy because healing time depends on you"

"Oh!"

"But as we mentioned earlier, you are a doctor too so you know it, right?"

"yeah, yeah"

"I feel better" Allison sighed, relieved.

"You were worried for nothing. Let's go home now, so I can rest?" Remy was ironic.

"Of course! As soon as I end blood test… It'll take two minutes.. I'll check the results tomorrow"

Here, now lie your legs. Allison helped Remy to sit although the brunette assured she didn't need it but the less she used her muscles the sooner they'd heal.

"So, what's next?"

"Now… you just try not to panic because of realization! Because that's what you usually do."

"That is why I'm asking what we do next, I don't wanna sit and think"

"Facing reality mean accepting things not avoiding the reflexion part.. Can we try?" Allison was being nice and comforting but Remy felt the bitchy instinct inside and had to fight hard not to tell her to shut up… "Do you mind if I go in my room for a while? I mean… Do I have to talk absolutely?"

When Allison went in Remy's room to make sure she was ok, she found her asleep. It was weird that she actually could sleep with no problem.. but Allison was used to Remy now.. She supposed she had taken the same sedatives House gave her the day before and with it, avoided to feel bad. Allison didn't like that idea because sleeping for forgetting is not better than running away and she didn't want Remy to take this habit. But she supposed Remy also needed her rest and if this could actually help her tonight, it also was a good thing. At least, she'll sleep without waking up with nightmares and move and hurt herself more, Allison concluded to herself while wrapping a blanket around Remy and turning the light off.

I wanted to ask you something... would you like this story going on as friendship... or would you prefer something more... I think I feel comfortable with both so.. just let me know what you think :)

thanks for reading