A Prince of Vos

by RoboticDragon

Starscream is one of the many offspring of the Alpha Seeker, but he doesn't want to follow any of the rules. No, he has other plans that aren't exactly praised in the strict Seeker society of endless rules. Contains abuse, interface, domestic violence, cussing, and slash.

20. Making the Connection

Chapter 20

Four stellar cycles later:

Thundercracker lied on his back on the cold berth in his cell. His legs bent, knees in the air, thruster heels pressed into the berthtop. His denta gritted, as his left servo covered his optics, digit tips clutching. His right servo roughly stroked and sent electrical shocks into his hard spike, giving him the only intercourse he could have. Ever since he had killed Crosscut, Skywarp and I were no longer allowed to have conjugal visits, since Thundercracker was viewed as "extremely dangerous." So, he would just self service. And self service a lot. Sometimes ten times an orbital cycle. He wasn't allowed out of his cell much, so it also helped to pass the time.

"Argh… Hah… Oh, Starscream…" He moaned, optics offline, imagining being with us as he always did. "Oh, I love you. Hah… Mine… You're mine… Nrrgh!"

A guard knocked on the door. "Hey, lover mech! Quit touching yourself and get presentable. The warden will see you now."

Thundercracker removed his arm and looked over, ceasing in his masturbation. "For a lecture?"

"To hear your probation plea."

Thundercracker quickly shoved his hard self into his codpiece before closing it. He leaped up and washed his servos in the small sink, then cleaned all around his codpiece and thighs. He scrubbed other parts of his frame, wanting to look as clean as possible to impress the warden. After all, he was trying to convince that he was a model citizen.

"Servos out." The guard ordered as he opened the small panel on the door.

Thundercracker turned around and put his servos through the hole, letting manacles be slapped on his wrists and tightened. He took a step forward and patiently waited for the door to open, then instructed to step out backwards. He did so, and soon was walking down the hallway, four guards escorting him, two holding their shock sticks out in case he tried anything.

He was led into a room with a large desk with three people seated at it. He was made to sit on a chair before the desk, his wings perking.

"Seeker Thundercracker of Vos." A large femme sitting at the center of the table spoke as she went through his files. "This is the third time you have requested to be put on probation for outside of the prison."

"Yes, ma'am." Thundercracker respectfully spoke with a single nod of his helm.

"Your behavior within my prison has improved exponentially. Haven't been involved in a fight for almost six stellar cycles now, nor have you murdered any more inmates. You have been very respectful to the guards and even have taken a lead in cleaning, organizing fellow inmates to work together at tasks, and stopped an inmate from killing one of my guards." She looked up at him. "But how do I know you are truly a better person now and not trying to trick me into letting you out early?"

"Ma'am, I am the sire of six beautiful sparklings. I will never harm my creations. I am willing to do anything to be reunited with my creations and be the proper sire they need. And to do my utmost to care for them and my two mates. I know I have made mistakes, I know I hurt my mate, but I'm going to, for now on, be the partner, the sire, the protector my family needs me to be."

"And that means no more beating your mate, correct?" She raised an optical ridge.

"Absolutely, ma'am. My mates are everything to me, and I realized that hitting them isn't going to get them to behave. I do not enjoy being struck by a guard or a fellow inmate. And it's made me realize that my trinemates shouldn't have to know that feeling either. I will treat them right. I know things may be difficult at times, but I will do my best to care for, provide, and be a proper mate and sire for my family."

"Uh huh." The warden straightened herself in her chair. "Thundercracker… If I let you out on probation, and you break your probation, you understand that your punishment will be beyond severe. And if I see you in my prison again, learning that you lied to me, I'm going to be immensely pissed off. And you don't want me pissed off at you. Pissing me off means a lot of suffering for you. Is that clear?"

"Crystal, ma'am."

"And you understand that if you break probation once I will not ever issue a second time for you, correct?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Do you now? Because I don't like being lied to. It makes me a very unhappy person. Do you want me unhappy?"

"Absolutely not, ma'am."

"Mhmm." She gave him a hard look before speaking again. "I understand you wanting to see your creations again. I'm a carrier myself. I don't believe you will harm your creations. But I don't think I'm entirely convinced on the safety of your mate. I reviewed everything about your court case and the things you did to him. You did some pretty terrible stuff to that poor mate of yours. And you weren't ashamed of it. Why would you be now?"

"Ma'am, I have been in this prison for seven stellar cycles. I've been beaten by guards, by other inmates, and have felt the life of being a victim to those you are unable to fight back against. I do not wish to cause my trinemates to go through that any longer. I love them, and if I must change myself to show that love, to make them happy, to not cause them to suffer, than I will."

"Hmm." The warden was quiet as she thought. "Thundercracker, I want to believe you. I know you love your creations. You talk about them non-stop. And I do think you care at least somewhat for your mates. And I hope you're being honest when you say you will no longer harm them." She paused as she wrote something on a datapad. "You better not make me regret this. I will allow you to leave early on probation. But if you lay one digit on your mates, you will be in isolation for the next ten vorns. Do I make myself clear?"

"Transparently, ma'am. Thank you, ma'am. I promise you won't be seeing me here again."

"Oh, I better not. And if I do you better pray to Primus because he'll be the only one able to save you."

"Yes, ma'am." He stood up when a guard grabbed his arm.

"Take him away." The warden gave a dismissive wave.

Thundercracker was led out, smiling as his wings gave a quick flutter. He finally was going to be free.

---

"I got it!" I exclaimed as I quickly ran over to the ringing communicator. I picked it up and held it to my audio receptor. "Hello?"

::Hey, gorgeous. It's so good to hear your vocalizer.:: Thundercracker's vocalizer sounded on the other end.

I faintly smiled. "Hey, love. Why are you calling? I thought you weren't allowed?"

::I wasn't. I just spoke to the warden and I have good news.::

"Yeah?"

::She finally accepted my probation plea. I'm coming home. And I'm going to hug you and never let go of you.::

"Really?" My wings perked.

::Really. I'll be let out in three orbital cycles as they complete paperwork and all that slag. So you'll have time to clean up the engex bottles.::

I smiled. "Yeah, there's a lot of those here." I fluttered my wings. "I can't wait to see you. Do you want us to pick you up?"

::Nah, I'll fly over myself. I'll give you a call when they finally kick me out the door.::

"Should I tell the Seekerlets or let it be a surprise?"

::Let's surprise them. I gotta go, now. Tell Skywarp I love him. I love you, Star. Be safe until I get there.::

"We will. Love you, too."

::Bye.:: He made a kiss sound before hanging up.

I vented a sigh as I hung up. I was excited about him coming home, but I would need to kick Skyfire out. And I had grown accustomed to him being around to help with the little ones.

"Who was that?" Skywarp perked his wings as he stood nearby.

I turned around, then hugged him. "Our trineleader is getting his probation. He'll be coming home in three orbital cycles."

"What? Really?" He said quickly.

"Shhh, we're going to surprise the Seekerlets." I kissed him on the lip plates. "We need to get this place ready for his return. And help Skyfire get somewhere else to live…"

"I'm so excited…!" He squealed quietly before kissing me on the lip plates back. "Finally, our trine will be full again."

"I know. I'm so happy." I fluttered my wings when he pressed his brow against mine. "And things will be better. I know things will be better."

"So much better." He kissed me again. "How are you going to break the news to the big guy?"

"I'll just tell him he needs to move out before Thunder comes back and murders him… Probably just move him back into a dorm."

"Have fun dealing with that."

"Blech." I rested my cheekplates on his shoulder as I hugged him. I was having mixed feelings about the return of my trineleader. And I hated it.

---

Skyfire was quite upset about Thundercracker returning. A little because he had to move out, but mostly because he claimed Thundercracker would just start beating the slag out of me again. I of course defended by trineleader, that pissed off Skyfire, and I found myself crying in Skywarp's room wanting to be alone after arguing with my best friend.

Not a good start to all of this…

Skywarp and I cleaned the apartment and Skywarp helped Skyfire move out and back into a dorm. We got things as settled as possible, and got a cake to welcome back our trineleader.

I was excited. I was happy. But I also had no idea the hell I would soon be suffering through.

He called to inform us he was free and on his way home. I told the Seekerlets that we all should watch a movie in the living room and hang out. The adolescent ones were kind of grumpy about it, but I made them do it. While everyone was watching the film, all of us bunched up on the two couches, and my youngest on my lap, there was a knock on the door before it opened.

"I'm home, my loves." Thundercracker smiled when he entered.

So many wings perked at once as the younglings all turned, their optics widening. Then the happiest squeals escaped their vocalizers.

"SIRE!: They all shouted, leaping up and running into his open arms. All of them except for Zephyr.

"My sparklings!" Thundercracker hugged his creations best he could. Two were almost adults, two were going through puberty, and one was already too big for me to carry any longer. So, he had to give more individual hugs. "I missed you guys so much."

"I thought you had three more stellar cycles?" Storm asked.

"I got out on good behavior." Thunder nuzzled his olfactory sensor with his eldest son's.

"You on probation?" Dawn inquired.

"I am. Of course there's no reason since I've never acted up in the first place."

Sierra barked her old femme bark, not sure who this new person was, but not angry since the Seekerlets were so happy to see him. She quickly made her way over to me, determined to ensure I would not fall victim to whatever spell Thundercracker had the younglings under. But, I betrayed her.

I got up and walked over to my trineleader, hugged him, and fluttered my wings when he hungrily kissed me on the lip plates. "I missed you."

"I missed you more, gorgeous." He smirked.

I sheepishly smiled, pressing my brow against his. "Don't get thrown in jail again. Or else."

"I promise I won't."

"Mmm!" Skywarp forced his way in and hugged Thundercracker. "Now you can get a job and I can go back to being a housemate." He giggled.

"As long as you do a good job with that." Thundercracker kissed him.

"Sire!" Rogue shouted. "Come see my room!" She grabbed his servo and tugged.

"Alright, I'm coming, princess. Don't forget to also introduce me to the dog."

"That's Sierra!" Rogue pointed. "Carrier says she's a diva."

"She is…" I grunted.

Thundercracker was smiling as he followed his youngest, her still pulling his arm. As they were passing the couches he looked up at Zephyr. My eldest flared her wings, optics glowing, engine growling, denta gritted, and displayed every single Seeker body language she could that if he got any closer she would attack and do serious damage. She was flicking her wings so hard that the hydraulics were making a loud popping noise.

Instinctively, Thundercracker flared and flicked his own wings back, but then lowered them some to show he wasn't a threat. Zephyr kept flicking hers, growling her engine, and tensing her frame. Thundercracker just looked away and followed Rogue up the stairs. And once he was out of sight did Zephyr relax.

I went straight over to my daughter, flaring my own wings. "What the hell is your problem? You do not show aggression towards your sire!"

"I don't want that abusive aft near me. And if you had any self respect you would keep him away from yourself." She snapped.

"Watch it." I jabbed a digit at her, keeping my wings flared. "That mech is your sire, my mate. You owe it to him for you even being here."

"He rapes you and beats you, leaving you crying and attempting suicide."

"I'm not arguing with you again. Be nice to him. That's an order." I snapped.

"I don't follow orders that are morally wrong."

"You better pray he doesn't kick you out of the trine early."

"I would love it if he did."

I opened my mouth to say something, but instead stomped off. I was hurt enough and didn't need to make my daughter angrier at me than she already was. I went upstairs and to Rogue's room, silently watching her tell her sire everything under the sun, showing all of her stuff to him, and seeing him finally getting to be a part of her life. She needed her real sire in her life. Seven stellar cycles old and just now she could be a normal Seekerlet with both her creators there for her.

The younglings had their sire all orbital cycle, telling him everything about their lives, showing him what they have been doing for school, their toys, and of course telling him everything about Sierra. Sierra certainly grew to like Thundercracker very quickly.

Zephyr kept her distance, being aggressive whenever Thundercracker looked her way or got too close. He was cautious with her, but I felt that at any moment he may strike and put her in her place.

That night, once all the Seekerlets were in berth, Thundercracker took his trinemates to his room to reclaim what belonged to him. He hadn't interfaced with us since before he killed Crosscut. So, he was beyond horny.

"And which one of my femmes should I claim first?" He asked after shoving us both down on the berth.

"Find a femme, because I'm not." Skywarp giggled.

"Fine… Which one of you love me the most?"

"Me!" I exclaimed.

Thundercracker gave Skywarp a look when he didn't say anything. "Do you not love me?"

"I love you bunches. There's a difference." He giggled.

Thundercracker rolled his optics and gave Skywarp a playful shove. "You're ridiculous. Fine, Star goes first. But when I get back to you you're going to be screaming my designation."

"No, I won't. I'm going to scream Star's designation." Skywarp snickered.

"You're so weird." Thundercracker kissed him on the lip plates, then climbed onto the berth and got over me.

As I lied there on my back, feeling Thundercracker's servos pleasure my frame, roving all over me, and getting me into position, I felt… I didn't feel turned on. I started to feel… Nervous. And I didn't like that. This was my trineleader. He loved me. He was just going to bond with me. But I kept thinking about the times he had hurt me with interface and was scared that this would be the same.

His codpiece opened, and I folded mine away. I felt his hardened spike touching outside of my valve, his powerful servos grasping my wrists and pinning them to the berth above my helm. He leaned over and kissed me on the lip plates just before penetrating me. I moaned into his mouth, feeling my spark pulse quickening. He started to thrust, and at first it wasn't bad, but he was eager. It had been so long since he had been in me and his lust soon took over. He started going harder and faster, pounding brutally into me. It didn't take long before coolant was leaking from my optics and I was scared. But I couldn't do or say anything. I remember the pain. I know what he would do to me if I denied him. I just had to put up with it. I had to be a good trinemate and not make a scene.

I was crying, gasping, and moaning pitifully as my servos balled into tight fists. But I behaved. I was a good, obedient trinemate. I just submitted and didn't fight him.

Skywarp was watching, his wings lowering. He remained quiet for a while before speaking. "Thunder… Thunder, hey." He put a servo on Thundercracker's shoulder. "I know you're excited, but you're hurting him. Slow down."

Thundercracker flicked his wings, annoyed, but then took a moment to study my face. He vented a sigh, and kissed me on the lip plates. "Alright. I'll slow down." He took a moment, then resumed thrusting, but was much gentler about it.

I was able to relax some, keeping my optics on his, but I still wasn't turned on. He had his way with me and overloaded twice into me, and I only overloaded once. He then pulled out and had his way with Skywarp, then came back to me for another round, then Skywarp again. Once he was satiated, he lied on the berth, pulling us close on either side of him. We curled into his chassis, happy to have our trineleader back. But I wasn't as happy as I thought I would be. I just felt… nervous. Like, things weren't right.

I pushed those thoughts away, telling myself that everything would be better because of Thundercracker's presence. Nothing bad would ever happen again. I was safe, he was home, and things would be uphill for now on.

Such lies.

---

The next morning Thundercracker checked the entire apartment. Everything. Making sure it was in proper order. Thankfully, it was. My aft was spared a beating that orbital cycle. But I already noticed a change in him. He was just… quieter. More distant. And cautious. Prison had changed him, and I was just beginning to learn how much it had.

"Where are you going?" He asked me as I was starting to walk out the door.

"Um work?" I perked my wings.

"I'm back. You don't need to work anymore."

"But… You don't have a job yet." I said slowly.

"It won't take me long to get another job. It's my job to provide for the trine. Not yours."

"I have a responsibility to my students. I need to teach them. I can't just quit the moment you get home."

"You shouldn't be working. You're my submissive. Your job is to stay home and take care of the sparklings, submit, and keep the apartment clean."

I swallowed. "Can I work until you get your new job? T-to ensure a constant flow of Shanix?"

He thought for a moment, then vented a sigh. "Very well. But once I have my new job you're staying home."

"Yes, sir." I gave an incline of my helm and quickly walked out the door. I transformed and flew off, feeling devastated about that. I loved my job. I love working, and making Shanix, and feeling independent with my finances. Going back to being a stay-at-home-carrier upset me. I love my femmes, but I don't want to be home all orbital cycle caring for them like before. I liked being with my students, my new coworker friends, and having my own Shanix I can spend on whatever I want without having to ask for permission.

I wished he would not find a job for a while so I could keep working.

I think Primus actually heard me that time because he didn't find a job. Thundercracker started to send out applications, he searched long and hard, but no one would even grace him with an interview. He had gone to jail for domestic violence, after all. No one wanted a Conjunx beater working for them. And not getting a job was frustrating and stressing him. I found myself often just grabbed and thrown into his room because he needed some stress relief. He of course chose me to interface more than Skywarp. I just submitted and let him have his way with me. It wasn't too bad. Just annoying because I didn't want it and was always when I was trying to do homework or grade papers. Not very easy doing those when he bites so hard.

But, I just stayed a good submissive for him.

Orbital cycles soon turned to orns and he still couldn't find a job. He was annoyed that Zephyr had a job and he still didn't. And soon Storm and Dawn graduated high school, family came and visited - minus Steelwing and his trine - and before long Dawn and Storm had jobs. But not Thundercracker.

Skywarp even found a better job and was enjoying it. Basically, everyone was doing better than Thundercracker. And he was becoming depressed. He hid it. He was a trineleader and had to. I knew Zephyr hating him depressed him. I could see it. But not being able to provide for his trine upset him as well. And it made me think more about the myth that trineleaders were perfect and were the ones to provide for the trine. My trineleader had cried, my trineleader had made mistakes, he lost a job and couldn't find another, he was depressed, he was changed, he was… Not the perfect leader, protector, and provider that trineleaders were said to be. And as I watched him fall…. As I watched him sink into the bowels of depression… I thought maybe he shouldn't be leading.

Zephyr was now 23 stellar cycles, Dawn and Storm 18, Tempest and Skyblast 13, and Rogue 8. My sparklings were growing up so fast, and with now three of them working and Skywarp and I both getting better pay we not only were able to get Sierra the surgery she needed for her knees, but we were doing great financially. Which meant I could pamper my daughters and nephews more, and get things for my trinemates. Thundercracker didn't seem happy about this, but I still tried to please him.

I would say things were going great, minus when Thundercracker would force me to interface, and the couple of times he did give me an aft beating, but it wasn't like past beatings, nor as often. Then, something tragic happened, and I don't know if this was meant to be a way of helping me or not, but it did change my future.

"Hey, you know what I want to do?" I smiled as I snuggled against my trineleader on the couch.

"Mmm?" He grunted, not looking at me.

I just fluttered my wings and cuddled closer. "I want to go dancing. Have a romantic date. You and me."

"Dancing?" He grunted.

"Yeah. It looks like fun." I fluttered my wings.

"Star, Seekers don't dance. We're warriors, not weak grounders."

"But, it would just be for fun…" I drooped my wings.

"No, Starscream. No dancing and no 'romantic date.' I already trined you." He snapped, not even looking at me.

I looked down, wings low, saddened by that. I had just wanted to dance…

The communicator started to go off, and Thundercracker got up to answer it. I stayed on the couch, wishing I wasn't a Seeker so I could do things that grounders did. It seemed like they could have all the fun while I just had to make sparklings, obey, and stay at home.

"Hello?" Thundercracker answered the communicator. "Hey, carrier, what's u-" He paused. "What's wrong? Carrier, why are you crying?"

I perked my wings, watching him. Did Steelwing do something to her? To Gale?

Thundercracker's optics slowly widened, then something I thought I would never see again happened. Coolant began to pool in his optics as he covered his mouth with his free servo. He started to shake his helm, as if in disbelief, then the first of his sobs escaped.

"H-he can't be! I-…. I'll come, carrier. I'll be there. I-is sire there? Don't do anything. I'm coming. D-do you need me to call any of the others?... Okay, I'm coming. I'm coming, carrier. No, don't be. Th-this isn't your fault. I'll be there by tomorrow. I promise." He paused, nodded his helm, then said farewell before hanging up. He turned to me, wings low, quickly wiping at his optics, but he wasn't calming down.

"What's wrong..?" I asked softly, anxious because it wasn't right for him to be crying.

"M-my brother, Darkstorm… H-he was shot by a grounder." He swallowed, trying to control himself, but more sobs just escaped. "H-he's dead. Th-they found him o-on the street dead!"

My spark dropped, optics widening. I had met a few of his brothers, he had fifteen, and Darkstorm was one of those I had talked to. He was very bubbly. Quite different from Thundercracker. Darkstorm had taken more after Borealis and laughed, talked, and always had to be doing something. I had liked him. He was the last one I ever expected to be murdered since he got along with everyone. But, grounders hate Seekers. All of us are in danger.

I got up and hugged my trineleader. He hugged me back, trying to calm down still.

"I'm sorry." He said softly, trying to regain control of his cycling.

"No, don't be. It's okay to cry. It's not right that this has happened." I kissed him on the cheekplates. "What do you need me to do? I'll come with you. I'll do whatever you ask of me."

"I need to go to Vos and see my family. A-and be there for the funeral."

"I'll be with you. Zephyr, Dawn, and Storm can watch the younger ones. We'll just leave the Seekerlets here."

"You have work."

"I'll call and tell them there's been a death in the family and I need time off. They'll understand." I looked up at him, seeing sadness, confusion, and shock in his optics. No one expected this and it was just out of nowhere. I cupped his faceplates and kissed him on the lip plates. "I'm here. You're not alone. I'll never leave you." I paused. "Let's pack so we can leave first thing in the morning. And I'll tell the Seekerlets."

"I can do it."

"Let me. You need to just… Not worry about anything right now. I'll take care of the Seekerlets, and I'll pack for you. Just… rest in your room."

He seemed like he wanted to say something, but instead slowly nodded his helm. He kissed me on the lip plates, then went to his room.

I stayed there, wings low, not sure what to do. I couldn't imagine what it was like to lose a sibling. Not at this time of my life, at least. And the thought of losing one of my siblings, my creators, my trinemates, or one of my creations filled me. And it terrified me. I swallowed, keeping myself from crying at the mere thought. I honestly didn't know how I would be able to function without my family, trine, or creations in my life.

I went to be with him, and he just held me and Skywarp all that night. No interface, no ordering us around, just holding us. I guess the thought of losing us had come to his processor as well, because he refused to let us go. He managed to hold his emotions in for most of the night, but I did online hearing him crying.

---

The next orbital cycle I informed the Seekerlets what had transpired and that I and my trinemates were leaving for Vos. The Seekerlets certainly were uncomfortable when they saw their sire crying. They hadn't even thought that was possible.

We flew to Vos, and Thundercracker was confused why I was on the right side of him rather than the left, but didn't ask. We still hadn't told him I had dominated Skywarp. But, he remained silent for the long flight. When we arrived at his creators' apartment the entire family was there. Thundercracker's siblings and their trines, TC's aunts and uncles with their trines, and his grandcreators. It was crowded, I felt so out of place, so I just held my trineleader's servo. I hated being around strangers. It just felt like everyone was watching me, judging me, hating me, and I wanted to be back home. But, I was here for Thundercracker. He needed me.

Borealis was a mess, bawling her spark out as her remaining seven sons and eight nephews all were comforting her. Gale was crying as well, and Steelwing… He wasn't crying, but there was sadness in his optics. He was hiding his emotions well. I knew he was upset because he didn't threaten or insult me. It was as if I didn't exist.

While everyone was comforting Borealis, and I barely was able to get in and give her a hug, I found myself sitting next to one of the trinemate's to one of Thunder's older brothers. No one had brought their creations, since this was something hard to put little ones through, but she had a very young sparkling, about four decacycles old. I couldn't help myself and soon found myself holding the little one. I had mixed feelings. I wanted another little sparkling like this one, so small, giggling when you made faces at her, and everything special about sparklings. But, then again I didn't want anymore until after I graduated, got my career job, and could settle down more. I knew Thundercracker was going to spark me again. I knew it would be before I was ready. I knew I would have no say in the matter. I hated it, I was scared when the time would come, but I just had to remind myself of the reward in the end.

Skywarp soon joined me and we just hung back, listening to everyone, feeling out of place. I was thankful when evening came and most of the family left to go home for the night. Thundercracker took us to his old berthroom, and needing to relieve some stress, forced himself onto us. I remained quiet, submissive, and allowed him to do as he pleased with my body, even though I wasn't in the mood. He needed some comfort anyway, so I wasn't going to fight him on it. I didn't even protest when he bit my nape too hard.

I cuddled against him when he was satisfied, thinking about what I had heard earlier. His brother, Darkstorm, had apparently been on the ground, in the streets, outside of a bar. They think he probably was going for a drink. Darkstorm was bold and not afraid of the ground like most Seekers. And that was his first mistake.

He had been outside this bar, and a fight broke out between some drunk grounders. It wasn't a typical drunken brawl, but escalating pretty quickly. No one was stopping it, instead filming it, cheering, and laughing. Darkstorm knew someone was going to be seriously hurt or possibly killed, so he ran in to stop it. When he was trying to pull the fighters apart, they turned on him. And the crowd approved. He was soon swarmed by an angry mob claiming he was trying to kill those two intoxicated brutes all because he was a Seeker. Darkstorm was over powered and couldn't fly away. He was being punched, kicked, and bludgeoned, then, someone pulled out a gun and shot him.

Darkstorm was left lying on the street, wounded, heavily leaking, and disoriented. No one called for an ambulance. He was left there to leak out all of his energon, people walking by ignoring him, poking him with rods, kicking him, and taking pictures. And he died like that. Cold, alone, ignored, and treated like just some object. And when police finally found out it had been two orbital cycles since he had died. The intoxicated grounders who had started the fight told the police that Darkstorm assaulted them, and despite all the videos of the entire incident, the police still blamed Darkstorm for what happened and no one was charged with murder. Instead, his death was listed as "self defense" by the mob.

And it took another two orbital cycles before Steelwing even got a call about his son's body being found. Darkstorm's body hadn't even been stored properly at the morgue and was on the way to being recycled by the time Steelwing got there.

And all of this injustice, hate, and violence because Darkstorm was a Seeker. Because we are such a hated creature. Because we became what we had to in order to survive against this hatred, this ignorance, this corruption.

My sire had been contacted about this case, and despite his influence and power, he couldn't get the information about who the attackers were. All he could find out was that they fled Vos to escape his jurisdiction. At least they were smart enough to know to fear the Alpha.

But, another Seeker had been viciously murdered, no justice for him, and left behind grieving loved ones. Such a cruel, awful world we lived in, and I hated it all so much. I wished I could do something to change things, to stop Functionism, to remove the corrupt Senate, to just… Make everyone equals and no more hate crimes.

I wanted to be part of a movement for peace, justice, and equality. Little did I know at the time that I would be helping lead such a movement that would change the entire galaxy for the rest of time.

---

The next orbital cycle was the funeral. Vos is an old city state. Seekers have always lived in her, since before she was even a city. Used to be nothing but mountains and we would live in that uninhabitable terrain, high on cliffs, away from grounders, nesting in the crevices to raise our young. And as the Seekers evolved, as buildings, towns, and cities came to be, and Vos grew from this mountainous land into what she is now, Seekers had been burying our dead beneath her. From the old caverns beneath the mountains, now they were beneath a city and the caverns, a catacomb long, intricate, and guarded, held hundreds of generations, thousands of Seekers, all in family plots. We're a warrior culture, death is a very strong concept in our lives, and therefore the dead are treated with honor, respect, and care. We always bury our dead, and always in the catacombs. Even if killed off world we make sure to bring our dead home so they can be with their family, their trine, and all the other fallen warriors.

To keep their honor even after death. To keep dignity, love, and respect to the person they were.

So, it was here in the cold, dark catacombs, gathered tightly in a chamber, that I found myself paying my respects to Darkstorm as he was laid to rest in a grave with those of his family. Even though I didn't really know him, I was crying as his brothers, creators, and other family members talked about him, remembering who he was. It was a solemn reminder of our own mortality, despite our longevity making us forget at times that even we can fall victim to death's cold grasp.

And being at this funeral, seeing Thundercracker cry, hearing those spark-broken words of a devastated carrier… It made me think about when I had attempted suicide. I almost put my trine, my beloved carrier, and my precious daughters through this same scene. I hated myself for that. I never wanted to ever hear or know that my carrier lost one of her own and had to kiss her sparkling goodbye before they were lowered into the ground, never seen again. My carrier, my family, they should never have to go through that.

I just had to hug my trineleader tightly, feeling comforted when he held me close.

When the funeral was over and all goodbyes said, we returned to the apartment. Not all of Thundercracker's siblings came along. Most just wanted to return home to continue their mourning. But, six of his siblings and their trines stayed with their creators to comfort them. I stayed close to my trineleader, never leaving his side. And the rest of the orbital cycle went well. Minus all the crying and mourning, of course. But, as things settled and calmed down, and people started to try to get their minds elsewhere so they wouldn't lose themselves in the pits of depression, that's when focus started to go places I didn't like.

It was that evening and I was seated at a large table, well, several tables put together, with the rest of Thundercracker's family. I sat to Thunder's right and Skywarp to his left. Everyone was just talking about anything that wouldn't leave them a bawling mess over Darkstorm again. Tank was underneath the table eating the scraps that Thundercracker's brothers kept slipping him. I leaned against my trineleader, optics dim, listening to his engine, hydraulics, and fuel pump quietly working inside of him. Then, I heard my designation spoken.

"Starscream, are you actually happy to have your trineleader back?" Steelwing grunted. Ugh, I hate him!

I perked my wings, then lowered them in submission. I hugged Thundercracker, just wishing that aft would leave me alone. I just don't understand why he hated me with such passion and always had to pick on me. He was such a schoolyard bully.

"He is." Thundercracker said softly, stroking my helm. "He's been very well behaved since I got out. Hasn't even denied me interface." He lifted my chin and kissed me on the lip plates. "I think my absence made him learn to appreciate me better." He kissed me again.

Ha!

Steelwing snorted. "Appreciate you? Behave better? Little punk is trying to get on your good side to hide everything he's been doing. He had that shuttle living in your home. Undoubtedly fragging it as well."

My wings flared and optics narrowed. I turned to face Steelwing, pushing Thundercracker's servo away from my chin. "Skyfire was helping us. I had just given birth and couldn't care for a newly emerge and also get a job to provide for my family. I needed help. Skyfire provided his assistance, time, energy, and even Shanix to help us pay rent, take care of the Seekerlets, and aided me in getting a job. You owe that shuttle for your grandcreations having a roof over their helms and energon in their fuel tanks." I snapped, wings flaring.

Steelwing flared his own wings back, much larger than mine own, making him clearly the dominant. "I do not owe a shuttle anything. Watch how you speak to me, submissive. I'll cut out your glossa even with your trineleader present."

Thundercracker growled his engine, wings flaring, making it clear he did not approve that statement. I leaned against my trineleader again, knowing he would protect me.

"Your preferred breeding mate dumped maggots on me and got a restraining order against me." Steelwing sipped from his glass, saying it all so casually.

Thundercracker shot his optics at me, wings flaring. "You did what?"

I lowered my wings. "H-he beat me… I was scared…" I said softly, quickly, not wanting to be hurt.

Thundercracker than glared at his sire. "I told you never to touch my trinemates." He snapped, wings flicking.

"He was disrespectful and acting up. He needed a beating." Steelwing replied as if he was speaking about the weather.

"Starscream and Skywarp are mine. They belong to me and only I lay my servos on them." Thundercracker growled. "No one else is allowed to touch them."

"Discipline them properly and then I won't need to do it for you."

"I do discipline them properly. They're not misbehaving, are they? Look at them. They are being very well-behaved."

"Starscream poured maggots in my mouth while I was in recharge. That's not behaving."

"I'll handle him, not you."

"You're doing a poor job of it. He's a slut being fragged by that shuttle, he disrespects you and your family, he is a complete and utter brat who should have been killed at birth. His damn carrier should have never been bred. She's a complete waste of metal as well with the manners of a whore."

No one insulted my carrier. I flared my wings and like an idiot I spoke. "When you made me get you more energon, I spat in it."

Steelwing choked on his energon as everyone else turned horrified optics at me. Skywarp rubbed his faceplates, knowing I was done for.

"You what?" Steelwing snapped, wings flaring, optics burning with the fire's of hell.

"I put it in my mouth before spitting it back into the glass. And that's not all. I put my own waste in it. You drank my waste, you miserable rat." I snarled.

And I was dead. Thundercracker stood up, yanked me up with him by my arm, and dragged me over to the couch. I was shoved over the arm, my aft in the air, and immediately I regretted every life decision I had ever made.

I heard the subspace pocket open just before I felt the horrible, stinging pain of a metal cable lashing across my innocent rear end. And it struck me again, and again, and again, and again. Hard, fast, brutal, without mercy, no hesitation, and so beyond pissed.

I screamed, clutching the couch before me, doing my best to not move because I knew I would only get more if I did. I kicked, wings flicked, and wiggled, but I tried my damn hardest to keep my aft where it was so he could keep hitting it. Submitting to him.

In no time I was a bawling mess, coolant pouring from my optics, my screams mixed with sobs and sharp intakes. And the blows just kept coming without any sign of slowing down or easing up. It just kept going and going, striking my aft, my thighs, even my wings. Just the absolute worst, stinging hell across my body with not a single moment of pause.

I managed to not beg for nearly a breem, but it was so awful, such a terrible beating I soon found myself begging, screaming, just pleading for him to stop. He simply grabbed my wing with his free servo to keep me in place and continued.

I do not exaggerate when I say he gave me at least 800 lashes. It was an absolutely horrible beating, and my aft, thighs, and wings were leaking, dented, and in so much agonizing pain it was numb, just feeling this pulsating pain coming from them.

I was yanked up, still crying, and led back to the table. He roughly forced me to sit down, which hurt tremendously, and I could only cry and look away from everyone, absolutely humiliated. But no one was bothered by my beating. They were mostly joking about it. The trineleaders, at least. The submissives stayed quiet, knowing the pain, but also knowing this was just normal and nothing to think twice about. The trineleaders just thought I was untrained and pathetic with my screaming, the begging, and how I kept wiggling. Perhaps if they new the pain they wouldn't be laughing…

I needed comfort, so once Thundercracker sat down beside me I reached for him, starting to climb onto his lap. But, for the first time he shoved me away. I was confused, not sure why he would ever deny me comfort when I was so upset. I pathetically tried to get on his lap again, sobbing like a sparkling, needing someone to hold me and him just remind me he still loved me. That he hurt me out of love. But, he didn't. He shoved me away, flared his wings, and growled his engine.

"No, Starscream!" He barked, optics narrowed at me.

I just sobbed louder, reaching once more for his comfort, and he very roughly shoved me away again, almost knocking me off my seat.

"Stop!" He snapped. "You're not getting on my lap!"

I was trembling, so confused, not sure why he would ever reject me. I cautiously reached out again, and he slapped me hard across my faceplates. I was shocked and terrified, looking up at him with wide optics. He had never hurt me for wanting to cuddle with him.

"You need to grow up." He growled, then turned away from me.

I felt betrayed. Like he had stabbed me through the spark. I felt so hurt emotionally now… I started to renew my sobs, looking towards Skywarp who was also horrified. I started to go towards my trinemate, but Thundercracker grabbed my wrists and squeezed it.

"Stay sitting or else you'll get a dominating." He growled in my audio receptor like I was a misbehaving sparkling.

I obeyed. I stayed seated, trying to get myself to stop crying, wanting only to run away. To hide somewhere. To just escape this place, this reality, this life. I thought about suicide again, then how Darkstorm was lucky he no longer had to deal with these people, this world, or all these rules. I hated the rules, I hated being nothing but a slave to beat and to spark, to be owned by someone who wouldn't even comfort me after a punishment. I hated my sire-in-law, I hated my miserable life. I wanted to die. Death was the only way I could escape this world. Please, just let me die!

I stayed there feeling sorry for myself, wishing death on myself and Steelwing. I managed to eventually stop crying and just let my mind wonder, keeping my optics on my servos as they wrung, not paying attention to anyone else. I found myself suddenly being grabbed by my arm and led away by my trineleader, my backside screaming in pain from the movement.

I was taken to Thundercracker's old berthroom, Skywarp in tow, then shoved on the berth. Thundercracker locked the door, got on the berth, and started to turn me over. I feebly tried pushing him away, coolant filling my optics once more, not wanting the interface, praying that I wouldn't be used. But, of course my prayers weren't answered.

I was flipped over on my front, my codpiece forced open, and he was inside me. I weakly cried, exhausted from crying so much already, and didn't fight him. It hurt. The pain from my beating now mixed with the pain of his harsh thrusting, his possessive biting, and his servos holding me far too tightly. I couldn't do anything to fight him. Just cry and submit.

Skywarp held my servo, offering me what comfort he could as I was taken against my will. It was the only comfort I got that orbital cycle.

I was used until Thundercracker was satisfied. I wasn't paying much attention to how many times he overloaded, but it was about five. And when he was done, he just shoved me over, pulled Skywarp onto the berth, and went to recharge holding us.

I curled against his broad chassis, crying my spark out. Skywarp held my servo over Thundercracker's chest, watching me, his wings low.

"I love you." He said softly.

I just cried, feeling like Thundercracker had never gone to jail, nothing had ever changed. I was back at the beginning, being beaten and taken against my will. And I was scared when he would decide to spark me.

---

We returned home the following orbital cycle, and I was punished for embarrassing Thundercracker in front of his family. I stayed in my room crying and messaging Gearshift for some comfort. That night, Thundercracker took me again, ignoring me when I asked him to let me rest. He hurt me.

I was thankful when I was able to go back to work and hide from my trineleader. Of course I never told his parole officer. I didn't see what he was doing as being against the law. He owned me. I was his to do as he pleased with and just had to stop being a sparkling about it.

My life was just back where it had been. I was getting punished a lot, taken against my will every night, and he was no longer comforting me after I was punished. He was just… He was different from that prison. He was more callous, no longer being gentle in any regards towards me or Skywarp. He was even quicker to punish us, he didn't spend as much time with his creations, and was very bitter and quiet. I knew he was upset about not being able to find a job, but this extended beyond that.

And I was scared for my Seekerlets, Skywarp, and nephews. Just how Thundercracker was acting, he was threatening me and Skywarp to quit because he didn't want us working, and hostility growing towards people. I was scared. I knew he couldn't lead a trine like this.

I kept thinking about life when he was in prison. Ever since I had dominated Skywarp things just had become… Amazing. Skywarp and I were equals, the fighting stopped, the interface was so powerful and loving, and I was happy. all of us were happy. It felt… proper. Like this was the way things were supposed to be. I loved it. It was the best time of my adult life. And I wanted to go back to that.

We were sinking in finances again, I was finding myself suicidal once more, and the Seekerlets were scared, stressed, and could tell things were getting worse. Something had to be done. Something drastic.

If things got better when I dominated and became equals with Skywarp… Maybe things would get better if I took over Thundercracker? I mean, I had everything going so smoothly before, I definitely could lead a trine until Thundercracker was better, right?

I am just going to say this now… This part of my life was not easy, it was absolutely awful, and writing about it was difficult. I had to keep taking breaks to get through just remembering this.

Rogue was almost 9 stellar cycles old when I made my first attempt. I walked over to Thundercracker, who was sitting on the couch, and stood before him.

"Hey, could I talk to you about something?" I perked my wings, remaining calm, even though I was screaming and trembling on the inside.

He turned to me, muting the TV. He watched a lot of TV lately, since no one wanted to hire him and he was avoiding his own creations. "What about?"

I swallowed. "Sir… Thundercracker… I know things have been hard lately. You struggling to find a job, all the stress from being locked away, drama in our trine… I know it's hard for you coming from the prison, so much changing, and you unable to provide for the trine."

He raised an optical ridge. "Your point?" He grunted, not amused.

"I… During your absence Skywarp thought he could take care of the trine and Seekerlets, but he wasn't able to. I was doing all the work. And it frustrated him and he tried to take over, we fought, and I won, dominating him. I have been leading the trine, providing for, and handling the finances for stellar cycles now. I know you want to continue your role of being the provider, but given circumstances at the time, I think it's best I remain in control of finances and handling the trine until you are ready to take over again. Given your mental state and lack of a job-"

He leaped to his peds, towering over me, wings flared, and optics glowing. "My mental state!?" He roared. "You dare challenge me based on my mental state!? You dare challenge me, period?!"

I stumbled back, terrified. "I-I don't mean to be trineleader!"

"Oh, of course not. You just want to do everything that a trineleader does. Provide, care for, and be in charge of the trine." He stepped towards me.

"Please, Thundercracker, I-I-"

"You will not dominate over me. You're a submissive and always will be." He growled.

"I am trying to do what's best for the trine!"

"You only will bring us down! You're not leadership material, Starscream. You're weak, scared, submissive, and cowardly!"

"I AM NOT!" I shrieked. "I cared for the trine during your absence! I ensured we kept this apartment! That our creations had energon and stayed in school! I have done so much for this trine! And you are not fit to lead at this time!"

He slapped me across the faceplates hard. I took two quick steps back, a servo rubbing where he had struck me.

"You want leadership? Why? So you can prove something?" He snarled in my faceplates.

"I want to ensure my daughters don't ever starve or are homeless." I managed to say firmly despite how terrified I was.

"My creations are best with me leading."

"Ever since you were freed, and then losing your brother, you have become inept at leading. You haven't even paid the damn rent since returning. You are incapable of providing for us at this time. I am. And I will not let you take me away from my job and leave my daughters and my nephews homeless." I flared my wings. "I will be the responsible adult since you clearly can't be."

And I was dead.

He lunged, I leaped aside barely managing to dodge him. I knew I couldn't defeat him in direct combat, so I activated my thrusters, needing to get some distance. But he knew what I was trying to do. He wasn't stupid. He released a sonic boom, I lost balance for the briefest of moments, and he grabbed my ankle, then slammed me against the floor. And once he had me… I couldn't escape.

He was on me in an instant, the punches raining down. I tried blocking, I tried escaping, but it was hopeless. He then grabbed my wing and dragged me to his room. I was thrown against the berth, stunned from the awful blows to my helm. I touched my lower lip plate, energon oozing out of it and my mouth. Then, he grabbed me, pinning me down, and chains were tied to my ankles and wrists, tethering me to the berth.

The things he used on me were a metal cable and energon whip, primarily, but also a tawse and this thick metal rod that was just a large switch. And during this horrible beating he struck my aft, thighs, back, wings, chest, and face. And he dominated me multiple times using that barbed spike cover. And he just kept beating me, ensuring I would never stand up to him again.

I don't know how many times I was struck, I just knew it was nearly three joors of this beating, the dominatings, the torture, my vocalizer breaking, before I fell into stasis lock.

---

I onlined in a hospital. The lights were bright, my body aching, and my helm dizzy. I felt so weak, so out of it. It took me a bit before I could remember what happened. All the pain, the fear, the… I started to tremble, coolant leaking from my optics. Then I felt something squeezing my servo. I slowly turned my helm, it hurting so much, and saw Skywarp sitting there, holding my servo, wings low, and optics slowly brightening. He leaned over and kissed me on the lip plates, his engine purring softly.

"I love you." He said quietly.

"Where's Thunder?" I weakly asked.

"In the waiting room… I don't know what's going on with him."

I swallowed. I know people will judge me for this, say I was an idiot, and attack me. But, I was still not free from the lies I had been made to believe.

"He didn't do it." I said quickly.

Skywarp perked his wings. "What?"

"He didn't hurt me. D-don't let them take him back to prison. I-I was attacked by grounders. H-he didn't hurt me."

"Star, if they find out you're lying…"

"He didn't do it!" I swallowed. "I-I was attacked by grounders… I'm a Seeker. We're attacked by grounders all the time."

He rubbed over his faceplates, tired, then slowly nodded. "Fine… Grounders did this."

"Where are my daughters?"

"Zephyr is at work. I haven't called her yet. Dawn is on her way, and the younger two are still home unaware. Storm is also on his way."

"He didn't do this. He didn't." I repeated softly, looking away now.

"Why did this happen?" Skywarp inquired, his optics on my servo as he stroked it with a thumb.

"I… I told him maybe I should watch the trine until he got a job. Because things have been sinking as he's been keeping me from going to work. A-and I'm not risking my daughters or nephews living in a poor house because of his pride."

"You challenged him?"

"Not precisely."

"Star, you know what happens when you challenge. He could have killed you."

"He didn't. He won't."

"Well, now we have a lot of slag to shift through to make sure he doesn't get thrown in jail…"

"He risked his freedom bringing me here."

"I risked his freedom. I teleported you away from him…" He flicked his wings.

"You didn't tell Skyfire, right?"

"Negative. He has no idea."

"Good."

"Promise you won't challenge him again."

"I didn't challenge him."

"Star, don't take the leadership role. You're a submissive, I'm a submissive, and Thundercracker is our dominant. That's how the system is. We listen, we obey, or else we end up in a hospital berth with nothing left of our rear ends. You need to, for once in your life, listen to authority."

"But authority isn't always right. Thundercracker is not right in the helm right now. The prison and losing his brother has changed him."

"He's still our dominant."

"He's going to throw us into the poor house."

"Why do you think that?"

"Because someone of sound mind won't be trying to force me away from my job when they don't even have one yet and probably never will thanks to their permanent record."

"It's his job to provide for the trine."

"It's my job to take care of my daughters and I'll be damned if anything happens to them because of theirs sire's pride o-or these slagging rules made up by some old mechs hundreds of vorns ago!" I snapped, my optics narrowed.

"Calm down." He vented a sigh. "Star… I get what you're saying, but, you're a little Seeker. Like, really little. Little Seekers don't lead, they follow."

"Brawn isn't the primary factor that dictates one to be of leadership quality." I replied sternly.

"You're talking like a grounder."

"Well…. Maybe they're right about some things."

"Starscream.. If you go down this path of rebelliousness… It's only going to end in pain, tears, and you losing a lot of energon. Please, for your sake, don't do this."

"The safety and well-being of my daughters always comes before my own."

"You can't fight him. You can't beat him. You're small and weak."

"I beat you."

"I'm not Thundercracker."

I paused, thinking. "Everyone has a weakness. Even trineleaders. I'll find a weakness, exploit it, and defeat him."

"How? By crying like a sparkling? You do that all the time and it has no effect on him."

"By using science, common sense, and staying ahead of him. I'm fast, he's slow. I'm smart, and he's a little… less smart."

"Starscream, how do I get this through that thick helm of yours that you cannot defeat Thundercracker. And even if you did how the hell would you stay dominant? He would eat you for morning refuel within the orbital cycle."

"I'll just use the gifts granted to me through Primus from my carrier."

"Your sass?"

I smirked. "My body."

Skywarp snorted. "He already owns that."

"He may own it, but he can't get me to give him the greatest sexual experiences he never imagined he could have."

"Oh? Like you know anything about giving such pleasures. Where's your experience in taking him anywhere but the turbofox style?"

"I've seen things… I'll learn, I'll pleasure him, and make him never want to bother with getting leadership back since I'll make him so damn happy being beneath me." I flared my wings. "In both ways."

"Where would you like to be buried?"

"Ye of so little faith."

"If faith means being suicidal, yeah, I don't have a lot of that." He patted me on the helm mockingly. "I'll prepare for the funeral. Make sure you write in your will that I get your vid screen."

The mockery was just making me more determined to prove him and everyone else wrong. "You know what? I may be small, I may be weak, I may be scared of my own shadow, but I'm going to show you, show the world, that it's not the big, strong brutes that are meant to be leaders. I know I can lead. I know I can take care of my daughters better than him. I will defeat him, I will be trineleader, and I will stay leader." I flicked my wings, pointing a digit at him.

"Prove it." He smirked.

"Watch me." I growled my engine, optics narrowed.

"Oh, I'll be watching alright. I'll be ready to warp you back to this hospital berth when he's tearing off your limbs."

"He'll be the one to lose limbs."

"You're cute when you're pissed."

"Keep it up… You'll soon be following me."

He gave a dry chuckle. "I'll give half an orn before you give up and submit to him to be sparked again."

I just glared at him, done arguing. I would prove him wrong. I would prove everyone wrong! I would be trineleader and I will provide for my family properly, since the current trineleader was not able to do so anymore.

This Seeker was stubborn, and once determined to achieve something… You damn better believe it will be achieved!

---

I told my lie, and the doctor didn't believe me, but I insisted and told him not even to report it because Seekers never get justice. He put up a fight, but I wouldn't let him win. I went home by that evening, my two eldest helping me the entire way, then all four of my spawn and my nephews helped to care for me. Zephyr got in an argument with her sire and threatened to report him, but I told her it was grounders and got her to at least not report her sire this time… Thundercracker avoided me. He took Skywarp away from me to use him, and Skywarp wasn't released for nearly a joor. He came back quite used and recharged with me for the night.

I just healed for the next few orbital cycles before I was able to I returned to work. I didn't have classes on campus at this time. I was taking a few online because I didn't want Thundercracker to try and prevent me from going to them as he was with my work. Just made things easier. But, I saw Skyfire less. I primarily just chatted with him online and with a communicator, just as I did with Gearshift. Both of them kept telling me to simply leave Thundercracker, but I of course couldn't leave the sire of my daughters. I never told them I was going to attempt becoming trineleader. I already had Skywarp calling me an idiot for it, so I just kept it to myself.

Nearly an orn after I had been hospitalized, Thundercracker started to go at me again. He would grab me, pin me down to whatever furniture or wall was closest, and force himself into me. I allowed him to rape me, now at this time I was actually starting to think of it very likely being rape, and never spoke out against it, no matter how much it hurt. And he was doing it more and more. He used to only take me against my will in the privacy of our berthrooms, but now he was doing it even in front of my daughters and nephews. I hated it. It just made me think that… If I hate this, hate being taken against my will, why am I letting this happen, but more importantly, why am I letting my daughters and nephews watch and learn that it's okay for them to be treated like this or treat someone else like this. I never wanted my daughters or my nephews to be in my position, being hurt like this, and being raped. And it tore me apart when they saw this violence happening. I found myself having to tell Rogue a little early about interface because I was scared of her walking in on Thundercracker taking me. And when I was explaining to her about rape and what qualifies as rape, I kept thinking about how all of those qualities fit what Thundercracker was doing to me. And I thought about everything Skyfire and Gearshift had ever told me. And I… I cried that night. I cried so hard, really beginning to realize that… I was a rape victim. I was being used. I was being hurt by someone who didn't actually own my body in that way. It's my body. I say who can touch it and when. I had a voice I needed to learn to use. I had to fight for myself.

But I still wasn't quite convinced. No, what gave me the final push was one of the scariest moments of my life. And that's saying something after all I've been through. And this part was beyond hard to write about.

It was nearly a decacycle since I had been hospitalized. The three eldest Seekerlets were at work, as well as Skywarp, and I was home after picking up the younger three from school. I was tired from my work orbital cycle, and kind of in a mood already because my students were an absolute pain that last period. So, upon returning home and helping the Seekerlets get some energon, I couldn't keep my mouth shut when I saw Thundercracker on the couch watching the news.

"I see you did something." I grunted. "Place looks great."

He glared at me. "I sent out more applications. What more do you want from me?" He snapped.

"Well, for starters, cleaning your slag." I gestured to the mess on the small table before the couch. "I'm not your damn maid, Thundercracker."

"You're my submissive. It's your job to clean." He said it as if I should know better.

My wings hiked. "It's my job to clean after myself and the Seekerlets. You're an adult. You can clean your own slag."

"You need to watch how you speak to me." His wings flared in warning.

"You need to actually be productive. I know you're pissed you haven't found a job yet, but guess what? You can have a job here at home and clean. I don't have the time to be a maid for you and everyone else. I have a job, I have homework, I have four daughters and two nephews to care for, and a dog. Have you even fed Sierra? Given her a bath? No? Didn't think so. Quit being lazy and clean something."

He stood up, leering over me, and despite keeping my faceplates an enigma, I almost released my waste tank.

"You want a beating?" He demanded.

"I want you to act like a responsible sire and take charge. Clean the apartment. You can start by taking out the trash." I grabbed a servoful of his trash and shoved it into his chestplates.

"I think someone needs to be reminded that they belong to me." He growled before reaching for me.

I leaped out of the way, and he lunged. I bolted, knowing I would get a horrible beating. He chased after me as I raced up the stairs and ran down the hallway. There's part of the upstairs that's like a circle, a wall in the middle of a large room basically that creates more rooms. And it was this I managed to run around enough and give him the slip. I'm fast, and got away and hid in a closet. I know, sounds not very brave, but if you ever were beaten by a pissed off Thundercracker, you would do anything to avoid the pain.

Well, I managed to stay hidden for a while before he found me. And when he did he was even more pissed off. He yanked me out of the closet by my arm, then slammed me against the wall.

"Stay." He growled into my audio receptor as he pushed me into the wall.

I swallowed, my servos resting on the wall, knowing I wouldn't be escaping him this time. So, I bent forward, keeping my aft out, as I rested my servos on the wall and leaned into them.

Thundercracker unsubspaced a metal cable, doubled it over, and began to lash my aft hard and fast. I cried out, jumping some from the pain, but did my best to stay put. I hated this position the most because it was one of the hardest to stay put in. And I knew if I moved I would only get worse. So, I just fought to stay in place as he brutally beat me.

As I was crying out and beginning to sob, I noticed Rogue was standing nearby, optics wide, horrified. She had never seen Thundercracker punish me or Skywarp before. Every time he had since coming home had been in the privacy of our rooms, or out on the balcony. But, my youngest was now exposed to the harsh reality of Seeker culture.

"Sire, stop!" She ran over, grabbing his arm and trying to pull him away.

"Rogue, go to your room." He ordered harshly, pushing her away.

"Why are you hurting carrier?!"

"He's being punished! Rogue, go to your room now."

"Stop hurting my carrier!" She was crying now, coolant in her optics.

"Tempest! Come get your sister!" Thundercracker shouted.

I felt so broken. It just didn't feel right that sparklings were suppose to grow up seeing such violence between people who are supposed to love and care for one another. If this was so normal, why did sparklings always cry when witnessing it and begging for it to end?

Tempest came and took her sister away. Rogue struggled and kept screaming for Thundercracker to stop, but he of course didn't listen. He resumed beating me, lashing my aft so hard even while Rogue was still able to see. I submitted and obeyed.

He gave me a lot. Probably close to 200 lashes before he ordered me to my room. I quickly did so and lied on my berth crying, keeping my aft pressed against the wall to protect it. I cried, and cried, and cried until I couldn't anymore. Then I just lied there thinking about how miserable and awful my life was and that I needed to be trineleader so I wouldn't be hurt so much.

Well… That evening Thundercracker came into my room and locked the door behind him. He came straight to me, still obviously angry with me. I shrunk back, feeling so small and helpless. I didn't want another beating. I just wanted no more pain. I pathetically looked up at him, wings low, being as submissive as I could to him.

"What has gotten into you that you suddenly feel like you could be trineleader?" He demanded, not entirely aggressive, but stern.

I didn't speak, just looked away. I was scared that my answer would cause him to hurt me.

"Things are changing, Starscream. You got too comfortable without me being around, and that's not going to end well for you. You need me. I'm the trineleader. This is my trine, you're my submissive, and those are my creations. You know how lenient I've been to you throughout the stellar cycles? I've moved out here to Iacon for you!" He jabbed a digit at me. "I allowed you to go to an academy when I know in the end you won't achieve your fantasy dream. I let you befriend that shuttle and let him come over. I let you convince me that our daughters and my sons can be friends with grounders. I have provided a family for you, a roof over your helm, plenty of energon, a warm place to recharge, and my love. And you are so ungrateful and full of yourself that you have the audacity to claim you could lead better than me? This city and the grounders that reside in it have brainwashed you." He flicked his wings.

I didn't speak or move, just looked down, coolant slowly leaking from my optics. I was scared of another beating. I just wish they would end. I just wish I didn't have to be scared like this anymore.

"I'm not going to put up with this behavior, Starscream." He paused to study me. "You're passed due for another sparkling. Maybe caring for another will remind you your place."

My optics widened some, not wanting this. He got on the berth, grabbed me, and made me lie down in the middle of the berth. I didn't want this. I didn't want interface, I didn't want him touching me, and I did not want another. Not now. How could I ever fight him if I was sparked?

I struggled. I pushed back at him as he got over me. I became a savage beast in my struggling, trying everything I could to get away. Shoving, hitting, kicking, kneeing, even biting. But he's so strong. He pinned me down, his wings flaring, optics narrowed and glowing bright.

"Stop fighting me." He growled.

"Please, don't!" I begged, coolant pouring from my optics. "I-I don't want to interface! I-I'm not ready for another! Please!"

I just got a slap to the faceplates before my wrists were pinned above my helm.

"Open." He flicked his wings.

I shook my helm, crying pathetically, still struggling best I could despite him now sitting on my pelvic area.

"If you don't open I'll tear it open." He snapped.

"Please… I don't want to interface… Please, don't do this." I kept begging.

I kept struggling, and he kept getting even more pissed off. And for the first time in my life… He reached down and grabbed my codpiece before tearing it open. And it hurt. I was shocked, and I cried. I kept struggling, but he was soon in me. I started to scream, hoping maybe he would stop, or Skywarp would come in and either stop him or make him somewhat gentler, or just… something would happen. He grabbed over my mouth, silencing me, holding my face tightly, hurting me. His other servo grasped my neck and squeezed tightly, almost cutting off my intakes. And then he started to thrust with all his anger, his raw power, and just so pissed off at me to the point he did want to hurt me to punish me, but also spark me.

It hurt so much. It was like a dominating, only missionary, and him holding my face and neck. And he kept thrusting harder and faster, and I kept crying, my muffled wails only heard by us.

And as I lied there, holding his wrists, unable to fight, crying, blinded by coolant, and looking into those optics that weren't my trineleader's… I saw Brakelight. It felt like Brakelight. No love, no care, just the need, the lust in each brutal thrust. I saw Brakelight and I felt all the same terror I had when I was 5 stellar cycles old and he had raped me. He had held my mouth shut when he raped me. He had beaten me before my rape and my aft sore. He had held me down and forced himself in. He… Raped me without any care to my screams, my pleads, without care about me.

And it was here, at this moment, as I was being held down by Thundercracker and horrifically fragged against my will that it finally clicked. It finally got through to me the reality of how these things work. It finally became clear that I, Seeker Starscream of Vos, was being raped and always had been raped by my trineleader, Seeker Thundercracker of Vos.

And when that realization finally, FINALLY, dawned upon me… I screamed. I was just screaming in a bawling mess of pathetic-ness, betrayal, pain, a-and feeling like a complete idiot. Feeling so betrayed by the Seeker culture, by everyone who I had trusted, and everything I thought was right. The pain of not just the physical, but the emotional. Of being hurt and betrayed, of being made a willful slave to my abuser, my rapist, and not even realizing what those two things truly were despite knowing the words. The pain of just realizing, finally, how truly fragged up the traditional culture of Seekers was that this crime, this brutality, this injustice is looked upon as "normal," "fine," and the "birthright" of a trineleader. Of someone who is stronger than the two others they are mated to. That not just the rape, and the forced sparking, but the beatings, the physical, emotional, and sexual abuse all made to seem it was right, normal, fair, and just how one went through life.

And I hated myself. I hated myself so much for believing those lies. For falling for the lies as the brainwashed sparkling I always had been. And I hated how I was not the only victim of these lies, of the lies of this fragged up society, of the lies my creators and others had been made to believe and teach. I hated being a Seeker. I hated being me. I hated everything I had done. I had wasted my life all because someone told me I had no choice in it. That I was meant to trine, to have my body owned by someone else simply because they could beat me up, that I was only supposed to be bred, raise sparklings, and keep house. That I was nothing, nothing but an interface slave to someone simply because that someone had brawns.

I was in such emotional turmoil as these realizations, these truths, this acceptance flooded into me. I cried harder, I screamed, and shouted, but it was all muted by his servo as he raped me. He raped me. He didn't stop raping me. He forced me to spark bond with him. He raped me and it hurt, and I kept thinking that word: Rape. It wouldn't leave my processor. Rape. He was raping me. Using me as he pleased against my will. Rape. It was all rape. It always had been. I was a victim of rape from more than one mech. I was a victim of domestic violence. I was a victim of an abuser, a rapist, a controlling narcissist.

Skyfire, Gearshift, and so many others had been right. They always had been. And I, like the blind idiot I was, refused to listen to them. Refused to see the truth. Refused to accept that I was a brainwashed sparkling living a lie, and trying to tell myself that this was just how one went through life.

I had been lied to. As has every Seeker. As has everyone who has fallen for the social norms of a corrupt, uneducated, and blind society. I was a victim just as much as all these others. We all failed to see the truth. We all failed to make the connection. And whenever we started to think for ourselves, to begin to put the pieces together, it was beaten out of us and we were humiliated, yelled at, and hurt to stay the brainless, uneducated, silent, and helpless lot we always were meant to be by those in control. By those who create and uphold the lies to benefit themselves and their selfish agendas, their greed, their sexual desires, their sick ways, their control.

It was all about control. Control for the abusers and rapists over their victims. To keep them silent and submissive. To stay above all others to make themselves feel better, empowered, and sovereign. Because the victims, the ones without a voice, we are not worth a second thought so long as the ones in control can profit off us, enjoy us as they see fit, and use us however they so desire.

And I was an idiot for staying with him for so long. I should have ran. I should have never trined. I should of taken my chance when he was thrown in prison to pack up my daughters, grab Skywarp and my nephews, and we flee to hide somewhere in Kalis or another city. I failed my daughters by keeping them around this abuser, this rapist, this… monster. I failed as a carrier by not doing the most basic job as a carrier: Protect my creations.

And that realization had me crying the most.

I kept my optics on his crying, screaming, and praying. He had his way with me… He spark bonded and overloaded into me five times before pulling out and getting off the berth.

"You're not to leave this room. If you do I'll flog you." He snapped before stomping out, closing the door behind him.

I curled into myself, hugging myself as I cried. I just cried, and cried, and cried. I couldn't do anything else. I was in shock, I was absolutely trembling so hard I couldn't even get my digits to hold onto my arms. I was a mess. I was just… I don't know how to describe it. I just couldn't do anything but cry, tremble, and be in shock. I just kept thinking about how I had been raped. How I always had been raped. And what an idiot I had been. I couldn't function.

It was several joors later, and the middle of the night when I had calmed down enough that I made a call.

::Mmmm, hello…?:: Skyfire's tired vocalizer sounded.

I swallowed. "S-Sky…?" I choked out, my vocalizer raspy, weak, static still in it from all my crying.

::Star? What's wrong?:: He sounded more online now.

I started to renew my sobs, taking a moment before I could speak. "Y-you were right. You always were."

::Right about what? What happened? Talk to me, love.::

I swallowed, trembling. Then, I spoke. "He raped me."

---

I hope that realization speech hit you all nice and hard. I really let myself go with that. But it's the truth. From things such as society and parents telling you lies to eat animals, wear fur, animals are "beneath" you, to be racist, homophobic, sexist, hate religion or someone for their religion, or whatever... It's all lies we are fed and made to believe by a corrupt, fucked up society. And those who realize the truth, the vegans, the activists, the people taking a stand, we are attacked, mocked, and often times murdered. Because we refuse to accept lies, to accept the "norms" of a corrupt society. These lies created by those in power to profit. The animal agriculture profiting off the lies that humans need to eat animal products, that we're omnivores when actually we'e herbivores, that animal testing is of use when it's caused more harm than good, that women are incapable and therefore shouldn't be in the workforce, that children are supposed to be hit and yelled at, that the way a dog or human looks dictates their intelligence and job, that a species is lesser than another just because of their species, etc. All lies, all made to control people to help abusers, help the rapists, help those who profit off their victims continue to make money. So abusers don't have to be good people, don't have to change, don't have to be decent. It all comes down to benefiting themselves, no one else.

When I wrote his speech when he realizes the truth, I was writing it about animal rights and the need to go vegan, actually. See how the victims all suffer the same and all deserve justice? His realization, the facts, the truth is how ALL forms of injustice, abuse, and exploitation continue and stay continuing. Through lies, through control, through making people believe that this cruelty just "has" to be done.

Break the chains, realize the truth, make a change, and save your slaves and yourself from abuse, rape, murder, exploitation, enslavement, and injustice.

Female wardens are scary... Based that warden scene off a scene I saw in a documentary about women's prisons... Scary woman warden in that... I never want to jail...

Thundercracker's brother's death is a headcanon I've always had. Nothing new, and not done because I lost Maggie. I had been planning to put it in this story always. Just shows the discrimination Seekers go through. And also is a reflection of what happens to non-human animals. So many are injured or hunters try to kill, and they are left to slowly die, sometimes in public where many see them, but nothing is done. And this happens to wild and domestic animals. Don't keep walking. Stop and save a life.

So, prison, losing his brother, Zephyr's hatred of him, the stress of not getting a job, and all this depression building up and not getting help for it is really fucking Thundercracker over. And he only knows that you have to beat and control trinemates, and breed them. He knows no other way of handling stressful situations, nor understands these feelings he's having. He's a trineleader. He can't have mental illness! So, yeah, it's fucking him up and making him worse, more aggressive, and violent. And Star is refusing to tell the probation officer anything so Thundercracker just is getting away with things.

Abusers will constantly claim the goods they've done will justify the many wrongs. It doesn't. Nothing justifies harming, killing, raping, or exploiting others regardless their species, age, sex, sexual orientation, etc. And this is something you will hear abusers do CONSTANTLY. My parents, for example, keep claiming them getting me pets, toys, and letting me live in their house justifies their abuse (that they refuse to admit is abuse) and that I'm just being "ungrateful." Love is not shown through a few nice acts, then everything being cruel. It's just like when people say they "love" animals than eat them. You can't "love" someone by literally paying for them to be raped, beaten, exploited, and murdered horrifically so you can get sick off their rotten corpse. And you can't love someone by getting them some gifts then beat them all the time. That's not how love works. And if you do think that's love, you're a psychopath.

Starscream's sass is rising up. He is beginning to sass and be that sassy gay mech (or is he a femme!?) that we all know and love. Near the end he sassed Thundercracker just as he does to Megatron! Sassy Starscream is BEST Starscream. Miss writing that about him in this fic! Soon, the sass will be overflowing once more and ya'll will worship me as being the best sassy Starscream writer. XD

No child things hitting, killing, or harming others is okay. No child is born thinking we're suppose to eat animals, kill them, hit them or each other, or do anything harmful. Hatred is taught. Rogue hasn't been taught that this is "normal" behavior, so that's why she reacted. And Zephyr of course never accepted it as normal, as some children don't. Those are the children who grow up vegan or vegetarian. Or people like me that despite being forced to be part of the bad we still fought best we could against it and now are extremely avid opponents to the lies, the abuse, the corruption, the slavery, and the killing.

I hope you guys were quite moved by this chapter. It took Starscream 20 chapters, 605 PAGES, to realize he's being abused. Or, for the amount I've spent writing this thus far... 5 months! Oh, and Illicitus was 606 pages long. This story is already basically as long as that fic of mine. And this fic STILL has quite a ways to go.

Am I insane? Absolutely. But, due to me being insane you all get these lovely, educational robot pornography that is teaching you the hard truths of the world, entertaining you, and... Yeah, gay robot porn. It's obviously a good thing. :P

Tell people you learned all about animal and human rights by reading gay, robot porn... That's a first. XD

I expect you all will be unable to stay seated while reading the next chapter. The shit will hit the fan. And it's gonna be a mess. :P