It was over.

It had seemed, for so long now, that achieving our aim, of capturing Corus and the palace, having Jasson knighted and on the throne was almost an impossible task.

Yet here we were, having successfully achieved it.

Not entirely, however. Jonthair was missing, and there were casualties. I'd known there would be…but seeing them was very different.

A week had passed since the battle, a week full of weeping families, mass burials, a hasty (yet traditional) Ordeal of Knighthood, the realisation of exactly how big a power vacuum the Rogue had left behind and a full pardon to all mages on Jasson's behalf, not that that meant much until he was King and could officially change the rules.

No one was exactly sure who would take charge of the thieves now. Hamrath was temporarily taking charge, but he was from Sarain, and wasn't consider fit for leadership by most of them, including himself. Yates was another option, though he had lost the trust of many of the rebels when he revealed his heritage as a Tortallan nobleman of the house of Goldenlake.

Speaking of nobility, it was now my turn to act. Jasson had promised me long ago that once he was King he would help reinstate me as the heir to Trebond, Olau and Pirate's Swoop, making me one of the most powerful nobles in Tortall.

Jasson's coronation was tomorrow night, exactly a week after Midwinter. Tomorrow, he'd hold court for the first time (though he'd been doing similar activities all week, but we had to follow some sort of protocol, I suppose) and my case would be put forward. I had a sneaking suspicion that Yates was considering taking over his family's estate, as his parents were now deceased, but he'd yet to announce anything.

As for the others, well, Graf had taken to popping in at odd moments like he always had, so nothing was new there. There'd been an enormous row between him and Sarasai last night in the throne room. Over what, I have no idea.

Siblings.

Lady Elenna had disappeared, and no one, in this realm of the Gods', seemed to have any idea what had happened there. The day after Midwinter, when I'd asked Alanna about it, she'd seemed just as confused as I was.

"I think Elenna was the traitor. She sent us to find the Jewel in the bell tower; it only makes sense that she'd be the one to set up the trap with the guards as well." I said, pacing back and forward in front of the Lioness as my brain whirled.

She stood with her feet firmly planted, her arms crossed, her face in what I'd come to recognize as her 'thinking' expression.

"It must have been her. It's odd that she managed to deceive Kel and the Goddess, but then she does possess the Sight." Alanna said a slight frown on her forehead.

"I'll ask the Goddess, and as soon as she is located, you will deal with her." She said, assuming her controlling mode, letting her arms fall to her sides.

"In the meantime, any sign of Jonthair?" She enquired.

I shook my head, wincing slightly at the mention of that particular fail. Jonthair had, much like Elenna, managed to completely disappear, much to everyone's annoyance.

In the few days after the talk with Alanna, I'd been blessed with my own dreams, though she had appeared two nights ago to tell me that they had absolutely no leads on either Jonthair or Elenna. She also took the liberty to remind me to continue with my training, as it was 'important to keep up one's physical fitness', or something like that.

As for Jasson, I was becoming a master at avoiding the issue. I hadn't told anyone that I could use the Jewel, it remained safely in Jasson's custody until someone decided on a suitable storage place. The revelation that I was a natural born ruler was shocking, and I even though I didn't really have anything else to preoccupy myself with, I kept putting the issue to the back of my mind.

The idea that my future was somehow predetermined seemed completely unfair. I suppose I should have thought about it earlier, what with the endless manipulation of my life down by the Gods, but I only felt used now, knowing that I was almost guaranteed to become Queen of Tortall.

There were other explanations to me being able to use the Jewel; I suppose the idea of me ruling another country wasn't entirely outside the realms of possibility.

I was completely conflicted over my feelings about Jasson. I was definite that I had feelings for him, I'd realised as much before Midwinter. Now, though, knowing that I had a very real chance of succeeding in that relationship…I didn't want to go there. I wanted to make my own choices, not be defined by what the Gods decided I should do.

Hence why I was hiding in the stables mere moments before the King's Ordeal. Jasson was to sit vigil in the Chapel all night, similar to what he'd done a week ago for his Ordeal of Knighthood. Yesterday, he'd asked me to sit with him, the only real interaction we'd had all week. If I'd had it my way, I wouldn't have seen him at all, but he'd come deliberately to the inn to find me.

The sun began to set, and I knew it was almost time for me to go to Jasson's side. My stomach tightened at the thought, and I couldn't contain the warmth that spread through my body. Another part of me, however, shuddered slightly, as it always did when anything related to the throne of Tortall was mentioned.

Sighing slightly, I made my way down from the stable loft, brushing hay out of my still-short hair, the bell signalling the hour ringing in the distance.

As it turned out, stone floors were not comfortable. It was freezing in the Chapel, and I was counting down the hours till sunrise, when Jasson would move from his spot and head to the Chamber of Ordeal. He appeared to be in some kind of trance, and was oblivious to my near constant fidgeting.

I really had no idea why he'd wanted me here. Of all people, why me? He didn't know of the predetermined connection between us. No, he got to have a carefree life, not having any inkling whatsoever about whom he would marry…

Though, I suppose he did also have the Gods meddling in his life. As much as Alanna annoyed me, I supposed King Jonathon must have visited Jasson as well. I couldn't help the smile that spread across my face at that thought. If Jasson had told Jonathon why he'd asked me here, perhaps Jonathon had told Alanna. Mithros knows how much those in that realm liked to gossip.

I spent the next few hours trying in vain to fall asleep, hoping that Alanna would miraculously appear in my dreams. A week ago, I could almost have guaranteed it. Now, of course, when I actually had a question (of sorts) to ask, she wasn't anywhere to be seen.

Not that falling asleep was working in any case.

Well, since I was in the chapel, I might as well reflect, I suppose.

My mind, being the irritating thing it was, jumped straight to the big question. Would knowing if Jasson had feelings for me change anything?

The warm, gullible, girly part of me exploded with joy at the thought that he might feel something. If he did, though, the rational part of me knew that it was a step closer to being forced into the Gods' plan.

Sighing softly, I stared at the back of Jasson head, subconsciously slipping into my own trance as the night wore on.

Considering how long the vigil had taken, the Ordeal itself was very short. A little over fifteen minutes after he went in, Jasson emerged, looking pale and shaken, but rather better than he had after the Ordeal of Knighthood. He'd emerged from that one to a crowd of fellow knights from his year, those who supported him and not Jonthair, a few of the rebel forces, and myself, though I'd hidden behind two burly squires to avoid his gaze.

Now, though, everyone else had been banned. The only other people present were two guards, standing by the door, looking almost as tired as I felt.

A grin slowly broke out onto his face as he stumbled across the stone floor, coming to a shaky stop in front of me.

I hadn't really spoken to him properly in a long time, so I wasn't entirely surprised to find myself speechless. All it took was one long look into his eyes, and I was completely lost, completely conflicted.

I loved him that much was obvious.

He might even love me.

I did not, however, want to marry him. Not because I had any objection to him, but because I didn't want to follow the plan of the Gods.

But, the warm and fuzzy part of me put in, why should I deny myself happiness just because it might be my destiny to become Queen? There was no sense in fighting destiny.

Yet, I didn't want to know, now, that I would be Queen. It was too much.

Ugh.

I turned my attention back to his eyes. My thoughts were too confusing for me to make sense of. Maybe I was fighting a losing battle, trying to stop destiny, maybe not. It was simpler, in that moment, to lose myself in eyes, his smile, than think about things too closely.

Especially since I'd had no sleep.

Unfortunately, or maybe it was fortunately, my brain was awake enough to register when he kissed me.

It came out of the blue, as things often seemed to around me and Jasson. One minute he was almost falling over with exhaustion, the next, his lips were on mine, and we were kissing.

Everything else faded to a blur. His hands were in my short hair, and I relaxed into his body, somehow firm and strong despite his fatigue.

I was completely and utterly lost.

He pulled away, just far enough that our noses were still touching, and I could feel his breath on my lips. The necklace around my neck was hot; I could feel it burning against my skin. If I'd been able to turn my gaze down, I was sure I'd find it glowing purple.

"I love you." Jasson whispered, his breath tickling my lips in such a way that I almost missed what he'd said.

Oh.

Oh, no.

He…he…loved me.

I loved him.

No. This wasn't supposed to happen. It was supposed to stay in my head, emotions that would eventually go away. Alanna didn't become Queen, she didn't have it in her. I obviously couldn't become Queen either. I was her descendant, after all. I was exactly like her.

The Jewel must have been wrong. It...no.

I couldn't deal with it. What it all meant, Jasson's kiss, the 'I love you'.

No.

Too much.

I ran, my footsteps echoing around me as I pelted as fast as I could out of the castle. I ran past a few people on the way out, but stopped for none. By the time I reached Flash District, tears were streaming down my face. I wiped them away hastily, entering the inn at full speed and locking myself in my room.

There'd been a few other occasions that I'd collapsed on my bed in tears over Jasson, but this one trumped them all.

He loved me.

He really, truly, loved me.

And that, that scared me.

A/N:

Yes, a new chapter. It's taken me..err..a few days, but still it's a rather quick update! Not on the scale of last week, but we might see that again...eventually. In, say, July.

Err..anyway...that was an epic moment. Alenne's a little crazy at the moment, at least in my opinion :P.

Also, let us take a moment to celebrate several milestones for this story….

In the past week, we've surpassed the 40,000 word mark, surpassed the 50 review mark AND surpassed the 3500 reads mark.

YAY! A massive thank you from me to all of you. This story would, mostly likely, not even exist without you lovely readers :)

Clearly my rapid updates were doing something right :D

Oh, and this is the twentieth chapter. TWENTIETH. How did this happen? :O