Dear Lucy,
When I got your letter, I'll admit, I was reluctant to read it but after some debating, I ended up tearing the envelope and taking in your words. I had no idea what you could want from me after all this time, why you were reaching out to me, and how you had even managed to get my address so you could send it. But that doesn't matter. What matters is what that letter contained.
I will tell you now, what I did back then was stupid and cruel. I was young and dumb but that's still no excuse for what I did to you. It probably hurt you enough to tell me and have to stay friends when every inch of you wanted more than that. It probably hurt like hell when I was talking about Lisanna so freely and openly. Just not returning your feelings did enough damage. So what I did afterward was just plain nasty.
When I told you I loved you back, I don't know what I was thinking. I didn't want to hurt you by not returning the feelings and I guess my idiotic self thought lying about it would be smart. I have no idea how in the world I thought that would ever succeed or end up good in any possible way. I knew that if I told you I returned your feelings, you'd be expecting a relationship but I didn't want that. Obviously. So I told you I wasn't ready for a relationship. It took me so long to figure out how wrong that decision was but by that point, it was way too late. By the time I figured that out, you had already realized those words were complete lies.
After I told you that, I didn't want to face you. I didn't want to have to face your eyes as they stared lovingly at me and I didn't want to catch you in the middle of daydreams, knowing some of them were likely about me. So I ran. I started avoiding you. I never talked to you first anymore and my time with you was spent trying to get away. Of course I always did it in a low-key way to avoid hurting you farther. I know now that doing that just made it worse in the end. So when our freshman year ended in high school, I was relieved to say the least. I no longer had to face you. That whole summer I saw you only like twice and I know for a fact that at least one of those was complete coincidence. We both just happened to be at the same place at the same time.
That summer was when I started dating Lisanna officially. I can't imagine what you felt when you found that out. That day at the fair was amazing at the time. Seeing you didn't phase me at all anymore. Now that the truth was out and you didn't seem to have any intention of talking to me, I felt free. That was so selfish of me but of course back then I was only thinking of myself. Whenever you and your friends walked by my new group, I noticed your mood changes. I noticed how laughs were immediately cut out when you saw my pink hair and how your face would be anywhere but toward me. In fact, my area in general was over the limits for you. I also noticed the barely visible but there winces of pain when you heard my voice or when you heard your friends mock me. Those signs should have made it obvious what you were going through. I just shook it off and brushed it away. I convinced myself that you would get over it pretty quickly. Your wound was still fresh that day so of course it hurt but it was nothing to truly worry about.
When summer ended and sophomore year began a few weeks later, we had one class together. Three months before, our multiple classes together were simply amazing for you but at that moment, that one was your worst nightmare. I could tell yet I simply brushed it off again. When we arrived at the door of that classroom at the exact same time, I noticed the flash of pain that streaked across your face when you noticed me and I saw the way your shoulders slumped and your eyes were cast down as you walked when I barely gave you a single glance. I noticed your constant glances toward me, your stiffness, and your constant shifting around in your seat.
I noticed a lot of things I realize now. Yet still, I had the nerve to brush it off as nothing. As you know, my relationship with Lisanna only lasted a few months. While we had been best friends for years, we just weren't meant to be in a relationship. Then when I started dating someone else, I know you heard conversations with my new friends about her.
I heard you talk about how you hated that class plenty of times and you always gave the excuses of "because it's chemistry" and "the teacher is creepy" but I have a feeling that wasn't the complete truth. I feel like my presence in that class dampened the class even further for you. Having to see someone who tore your heart into a million pieces every day of your life minus weekends had to have hurt like nothing else. Of course eventually you learned to deal with it and you started speaking loudly as you do and your fear of me noticing you became more and more ignorable. After a few months, I stopped noticing you though and I barely noticed you anymore despite being in that class. I bet you still noticed me all the time.
I have no excuse for what I did back then and I know you deserve so much more but just know that I deeply regret my actions. Reading your letter brought back those memories and with them came a remorse I hadn't known before. I know it's impossible to take back what happened ten years ago but I need you to know that if I could, I would go back and tell the truth right away. Of course it would still hurt you but at least I wouldn't hurt you even further.
After reading you letter, I decided to send you my own so you know that I did as you asked and remembered you. You might be pleased to hear this or you might not be, I don't know, but I have not dated since high school. Think of it as karma for what I did to you. I have a good job, house, and friends, but karma has left me single. It will probably keep me this way for years considering the pain you're still going through. These two words will never be enough but they're the most I can do right now so I'll say them anyway. I'm sorry. I'm so incredibly sorry for my actions back then.
That's about all I can say so it's time I finish this letter to you. I hope that after you sent that letter, you gained the ability to move on and that this reply will help you even further. I hope that from now on, you can go live your life like you should've been able to long ago. I may have forgotten you after sophomore year but now that I've remembered you, there's no way I'll forget. I wish you well, Lucy. Goodbye.
With Regret and Sorrow,
Natsu Dragneel

Alright! Here's the new update. It's a continuation of the last one-shot, With Love and Pain, Lucy Heartfilia. This update is dedicated to MarSofTheGalaxies for suggesting it! I hope you all enjoyed it!