They landed with a thud, in a wet thorn bush.
"Fucking shittery," said William. "There wasn't meant to be a bush here. You all right, Professor? All limbs still on? Never managed that without Splinching before."
"I think everything's still attached, thank you William," said Remus. "Could you help me out this bush, though?"
William pulled for a second, thought better of it, and dropped Remus' arm. Remus flopped back into the bush with a muffled 'oof'. It wasn't dignified, but he didn't have the energy to do anything else and he didn't think his legs would tolerate it anyway. William fumbled in his pocket, waved his wand, and Remus was unceremoniously hoisted into the air.
"Sorry. Forgot I could do magic again now. I'll levitate you up to the house if you like?"
"I think I'd prefer to walk, if you don't mind," said Remus. "And please let me down gently." The last bit was slightly too late.
"Sorry," said William again.
"Where are we, anyway?" Remus asked, once he was back on his feet and walking after William. He felt wobbly, but better than he had after his last fight. There was more plant matter on him than he wanted, though. He pulled the worst of the leaves from his jacket.
"Oh, yeah, we're back at the old pack house," said William. "Ottoline should be here already. She wanted to rescue you too, but I made her go on ahead. Thought someone should warn Anna and the others, in case you were in a state, and they had their eye on her but they'd all forgotten about me."
William had no sooner said their names than the two women were running out of the house that was looming in the distance and across the grass towards Remus and William.
"Remus! Are you alright?" shouted Anna.
"Remus! I'm so glad you are here! William made me go, I wanted to help you, oh Remus!"
"Much love for the rescuer," grumbled William.
They collectively hustled Remus into the house, and upstairs to the bedroom he'd used over the summer when he'd led the pack. Anna fussed over him, checking him for injuries, while Ottoline passed her items. She'd tried to check him all over, and had managed to remove his jumper and shirt before he could protest, but he refused to let her take his trousers off. A man needed his dignity.
Once they were certain he was physically fine, if a bit battered, they made him rest and drink a Restorative Draught on the bed while William told the story of his daring rescue.
"And he'd got Remus backed into a corner, Remus had been fighting fantastically, he's so fast! Greyback got caught by a spell, and knocked Remus down with him, and I Disillusioned myself and ran into the corner with them. When Greyback threw Remus' wand, I grabbed it, here you are Professor," he handed back the wand to Remus, "and waited. Got my chance to reveal myself and we Apparated off. Misjudged it slightly, hence the twigs in Remus' hair."
"You were so brave," said Ottoline. She'd manoeuvred herself onto his lap and was happily sitting stroking his hair as he spoke. Slightly nauseating, but they were good together. She made him sit up and pay attention more, take things more seriously, and he calmed her down.
"You both were," said Anna. "And Ottoline, I'm sure."
"Where's Mike?" asked Remus, realising who was missing.
"We don't know," said Ottoline. "He slipped away from us as you first challenged Greyback, when everyone was distracted. I saw him opening the doors, and he lead a fair few people through it. Some of Greyback's lot near the back noticed everyone leaving, and started a scuffle. He was in that last I saw of him."
"He'll be okay," said Anna. "He can take care of himself."
"I hope so," said Remus.
Anna threw Ottoline and William out before long, stating that Remus needed rest. Remus didn't feel particularly fragile, but the younger two needed their alone time, and their sleep, and he didn't want them to sit with him out of duty. And Ottoline likely wanted to see her sister for the first time in months. The two of them half ran out, hands joined, Ottoline's golden blonde curls dancing after her.
Remus wished being a young werewolf in wartime had been as happy for him, as it seemed to be for them.
"Will you go back?" asked Anna, seating herself in an armchair by the window. She looked older than she had when Remus had last seen her, back in October. Her eyes were more lined, her face more stern. She had lost her calm, collected demeanour and was nervous and twitchy now. Remus supposed he looked worse. He didn't look in a mirror often.
"No," Remus replied. "I don't think I could if I wanted to. The ones that would be friendly are the ones that will have left. The others wouldn't let me back. I've most likely failed, but there we are."
"Have you?" said Anna. "You persuaded a few not to join. Ottoline told me you found out a lot about their plans and how they worked. You at the very least disrupted their attempts to make all that pack join You-Know-Who. If that's your idea of failure, then your successes must be amazing."
"It's possible. I don't get many of them."
Remus shifted himself around on the bed, trying to get himself into a comfortable position. He'd never really liked this bed. He'd been busy on the day they'd all moved in, mediating arguments and dealing with other people's questions, and he'd been given the last room available. The bed was comfortable, but something had never felt right about it. The green velvet coverings were too slippery to get properly wrapped in.
And his diamond boots were almost certainly too small. Remus thought he needed to appreciate having a bed at all, not continue whining about this one.
Anna was watching him closely from the matching green velvet chair. So much green. Remus didn't like green.
"Remus, are you alright?"
In answer, Remus sat up and chucked the covers off the bed.
"I hate these stupid covers," he said.
Anna sat back. The curtains behind her chair, also green but in a oddly shiny fabric, blew open slightly and Remus could see the sun beginning to rise across the gardens of the house. He'd had no clear idea of what the time was for a while now, but he hadn't thought it was dawn quite yet.
"Well," said Anna, "we can get you some new ones."
"I'm not going to stay long," said Remus. "Just until I'm safe to travel, and then I'll be out of your way."
"What do you mean?" asked Anna.
"I can't stay here," he said. "I've caused problems again. I nearly got myself killed, as I'm sure that's where Greyback was going, and I put William in danger having to save me. I'm going to go and find Mike."
"And exactly how did you put William in danger? He made the choice to do what he did."
Remus paused. "You could argue that. But if I hadn't been so stupid as to argue with Fenrir Greyback, of all people, then I wouldn't have got myself into a situation when he needed to make that choice."
"Ottoline told him to leave with her, you know. She said they should bring back more people, and that it would be foolish to try and save you alone. She was distraught, because she thought she was leaving both of you to your deaths. We were preparing to come to your rescue when we heard that crash of yours in the garden. And, besides, even she said that somebody needed to do what you did, otherwise there would have been even more deaths."
Remus thought of the man who had died, and flopped back into the pillows. "He didn't deserved death. He didn't do anything except stand up for what was right. Nobody deserves to die just because somebody else wants to show they're tough. I've lost so many people because of all of this, and I don't want to lose any more, Anna. I didn't have that many friends to start with."
"I know," said Anna. "You have friends here, but I'm going to tell you what I told one of my children once. You deserve friends and happiness. But, you've got a tendency to be a bit self-centred, and the more self-centred you get, the less friends you're going to have." Seeing Remus' outraged face, as he tried to rise back out of the pillows and failed, getting stuck in them, she thought for a moment. "I'm not saying this to wind you up, I'm saying it to help you. You're a lot like Callie, my eldest. She goes off in one and feels sorry for herself and forgets things, sometimes.
"What I'm saying is, I understand why you have these tendencies but they aren't going to help you in your life. You said before that you can't go out with that girl, Tonks was it?, because you can't put that kind of life on her. Well, knowing you, you've explained exactly what it would entail and she understands, I think, because she doesn't sound stupid. So have you thought about maybe accepting that she knows the risks and wants you anyway?"
"That's exactly what she told me," said Remus. He didn't like the idea of all the women he knew agreeing about this. Next he knew Ottoline would be giving him lectures. Ottoline was the last person he wanted telling him off. He had a sudden vision of Ottoline in the style of Molly Wesley, with loads of kids and dealing with them with style and very little apparent effort. It amused him that William may one day find himself in an Arthur Weasley role. Except without the Muggle obsession.
"See," said Anna, although Remus didn't. It still wasn't logical.
He told Anna that.
"Love isn't logical," she said. "I loved my husband. When I was bitten, I assumed that he would continue to love me. I'm essentially the person I was the day before, when he'd given me a kiss before I went out to visit a friend on the full moon and told me he loved me. Perhaps you would argue it is logical he didn't, but I wouldn't."
"I'm just not sure that a romance between a werewolf and a non-werewolf can work."
"I don't think you'll know unless you try it."
"I don't want to hurt her."
"I think you don't want to hurt yourself."
Remus struggled against the pillows once more to try and pull himself upright. It was a losing battle, although whether because of the pillows or the effects of the fight on his body he wasn't sure. He decided it was the pillow's fault, and launched one of them from the bed to join the covers on the floor.
He had nothing to say to Anna's words. Not really. Of course he didn't want to hurt himself. Nobody sets out to hurt themselves!
But what would happen to him if it all failed? He'd have lost someone he considered a friend, which hurt more and more each time, but wouldn't ruin him. He could survive it.
"If I hurt her during a moon, that would ruin me, yes. I don't want to do that because I wouldn't be able to live with myself, yes. But what about her? What if I kill her?"
"What are the chances of that?" asked Anna, but she didn't look convinced.
"I love her so much that I cannot risk it," said Remus.
"I loved a man after my husband," said Anna. She had been looking at him all the way through their previous conversation, but was now finding her fingernails very interesting indeed. "He was kind, brave, very intelligent, and always put other people's needs in front of his own. He cared about everyone so very much that he forgot to put his own needs first just occasionally. It's difficult, when you love someone, to make choices that are the right ones for both of you, but mostly I think people should just try."
"Who was he?"
"You," she said, simply. She'd picked at the skin around her nails during their conversation, as if through nervous energy, and it was red and bleeding slightly. "But somehow I doubt that you'll want me."
And Remus was left feeling even more confused than before.
"I don't," he said, not sure where he was going. "I can't, I don't…"
"I know," she said. "You're in love with Tonks, which is why I've never mentioned this before."
Remus looked at her. She was a good person. He valued her kindness, her ability to find the good in everyone, and her ability with potions and healing. She was an attractive woman, too. He imagined he could have a long, happy life with her, without the dangers that would come with a relationship with a witch.
But he felt nothing except for friendship, and he couldn't do it.
"It's not that I don't want to be able to," he said, fairly lamely, "I like you, I just don't…"
"Love me. I know. I accept that. I didn't really expect you to. Heroes fall for the heroine, not the support staff."
"Sorry," said Remus, even more lamely. "I don't have much experience with finding women in love with me."
"It's obvious," said Anna, a faint trace of her usual smile appearing on her face. "You know, I fancied you at school."
"What? You knew me at school?" asked Remus. "I'm sorry," he said again, "that doesn't make me sound any better as a person, does it?"
"I was in your year, in Ravenclaw. I don't think you understood the effect your gang had on the school. You were all so incredibly fanciable, even the little short one. My best friend was obsessed with Sirius, she used to doodle 'Mrs Sirius Black' and pictures of hearts all over her parchment in History of Magic and then ask to copy my notes. Girls would actually panic if they saw you. You'd stroll around the corridors like you owned the place, and even though you were in so much trouble all the time everyone still liked you."
"Did you ever write Mrs Remus Lupin?"
"No," she said. "Maybe. I was sixteen, seventeen at most."
"I never understood the girls at school," he said. "You all just giggled at us and never said anything."
Anna laughed, and Remus could imagine the pair of them at Hogwarts, her giggling like she was now and him and his friends strutting around.
"Sorry if I was a bit of a twat," he said.
"You weren't. Not really. Not any more than any other teenage boy."
Remus thought of Harry suddenly, who despite all of his trials had still managed to be a twat to girls occasionally from what Ginny had told him at Christmas.
"Do me a favour, though," said Anna, "to make up for being a bit of a twat. Next time you see Tonks, just listen to her properly. Okay? I'm not saying start a relationship with her, or with me, but at least hear her out. And also get some sleep now."
"Alright," said Remus. He reached down for the covers, remembered that he could use magic now, and levitated them onto his bed. When Anna left, he stripped down and Summoned the pyjamas he'd left behind here in a drawer, all without moving off the bed. Being able to use magic again was like having a body part back, he thought as he drifted off to sleep. He knew he would dream of wolves and Hogwarts.