AN: Thank you!: Star Princess, Lunar Iris, Duskblood, Shadow Pain, Denidene, Gozarunoda, and everyone else who has been reading!

I think this is my longest chapter yet. I must still be sick. Haha…

Chapter 19

"Good morning, Taicho!" Matsumoto said in her usual cheeriness. Toshiro grunted and went to his desk. He busied himself in the stacks of paperwork that had been accumulating over the past few days.

"You look tired. Rukia-san keep you up last night?" she said teasingly. She was taken aback when she saw the anger in her Taicho's eyes.

"I don't know what you were trying to pull yesterday, but whatever it is you think you're doing, stop." He said, almost grinding out the words.

"You know I would never – "

"Matsumoto, I mean it."

"I understand, I-I'm sorry." She said as a hell butterfly made its way into the office. Sighing, Toshiro held out his hand where it obediently landed.

Hitsugaya-taicho, your presence is requested at the 4th Division immediately. We have broken the news to Hinamori-san about Abarai Renji.

Toshiro threw his brush down and left the office without saying a word. Matsumoto looked at the door thinking about her actions yesterday.

"This is turning into such a mess. Now what am I supposed to do?"

Toshiro entered the 4th Division's medical wing and walked to Momo's room. Oddly, no one was around, particularity Unohana. With a slight scowl on his face he entered her room. She was sitting up like last night, only this time she was crying.

"Sh-sh-shiro-ch-chan! He-he-he's dead!" She said between her sobs. He walked over to her and took her hand. She pulled him into her arms for an embrace and started crying on his shoulder. "I-I can't believe he's gone! He-he was a good friend."

"I know, I'm sorry, Momo." He said as he patted her back. He tried to pull away, but she tightened her grip. Toshiro was relieved when Unohana came in and Momo was forced to release him.

"Please excuse me, but I thought I would check in on you. I see you are in good hands. Maybe you would like to help her outside for a little while?"

"I would like that. Could we take a small walk, Shiro?" Momo asked getting up. "I practiced standing and walking yesterday." She giggled.

"Sure," Toshiro said as he held out his hand for her. She took it and then wrapped her arm around his. As they left Momo's room and started down the hallway, Toshiro looked up and saw Rukia enter the building. Their eyes met briefly before Unohana ushered Rukia into one of the rooms and closed the door. He resisted the strong urge to follow. He wanted to know how she was this morning. After last night's nightmare, he rocked her and held her till she fell back asleep. He ended up watching over her for most of the night and left at his usual time before she awoke.

"Shiro-chan, would you like to have a picnic today? Maybe after our walk in the gardens we could take some food out there." She looked up at him and saw that he was distracted. She followed his gaze and frowned catching site of the other woman being pushed into a room. She quickly replaced it with a smile, "Shiro-chan?" Toshiro looked down at Momo.

"That would be fine."

They made their way outside to the gardens. Momo was tired so they sat on the bench overlooking several plots of different herbs and flowers.

"Aren't they pretty? Don't they remind you of home?"

"Not really," he said. He was trying to focus on his conversation instead of wondering why Rukia was here. Was she hurt? Did something happen? Although he told her what was expected of him and how often he would probably have to visit Momo, he still felt guilty. He thought he saw a flash of fear in her eyes, but he couldn't be sure.

"What are you thinking about?"

"Huh? Oh, just the amount of work I have on my desk and how you are."

"You're always so concerned about me. I love that about you." She said sweetly. Toshiro grunted. A shadow fell across Momo's face. "They're having a ceremony tomorrow for Renji-san. Are you going?"

"I have to go, it's expected."

"Will you take me?"

"I don't think that's a good idea, Momo."

"Please don't get so protective of me. He was my friend."

"Momo, you just woke up. I don't think you're strong enough to go."

"I'll be fine as long as you're there beside me." She looked at him pleadingly, "I don't remember, but I think he might have saved me. I need to be there."

A thought occurred to him then. "Fine, I'll make sure you attend." She threw her arms around him.

"Thank you, Shiro-chan."

"It's Hitsugaya…forget it." The garden was set on the side of the medical wing with the windows of the rooms overlooking it. While you couldn't see the front entrance from where they were sitting, you could see the path that led to the front.

Rukia left the building and was walking away when she heard the same female voice from her dream. "Thank you, Shiro-chan". She shuddered knowing it was Momo. She turned around and saw them together on the bench, her arms around him. She turned away and increased her pace. She knew what he was doing and why, but that didn't make it hurt any less to see.

"Kuchiki..." She stopped, turned and saw that Toshiro was coming up to her. "Hey."

"Hitsugaya-taicho," she said, giving him the formal bow.

"What are you doing here? Are you ok?" He resisted the urge to touch her. Bad enough he left Momo to talk to her, but he just had to know she was ok.

"I'm fine. I was here for my final medical clearance after…after the pregnancy." She winced slightly as she said it. "I can officially start training again."

"I see, that's good then," The look of concern not leaving his face.

"You'd better get back to Momo." Rukia said as she glanced over Toshiro's shoulder. Momo was still on the bench, a strained smile plastered to her face.

"Yeah, they told her about Abarai this morning."

"Ah," she said as her eyes looked down, "See you later?"

"Yes," he said reluctantly turning back towards Momo. Rukia gave the customary bow and continued on her way.

"What was that all about?" Momo asked when Toshiro returned.

"That? Nothing, I was checking on her for her brother. Abarai was her closest friend." He said, well it wasn't exactly a lie, Byakuya was allowing him to look after her.

"Yes, they grew up together. He was so in love with her until she left him for the Kuchiki's. He was devastated for a while after she left."

"I don't think she really had a choice in the matter to become a Kuchiki."

"Of course she did, Shiro. Anyway, why would her brother ask you to check on her? Is it a Captain's thing?"

"Yeah, something like that."

"She didn't look all that sad. I know I would be devastated if something happened to you." She said, shyly. Toshiro was getting irritated.

"Momo, I've got a ton of paperwork to do, do you think we could have that picnic later?"

"You work too hard, you know that?" she said looking at him. "How about you get to work and come by for dinner again? We could watch the sun set together."

"I'll see what I can do," He said getting up. They walked back to her room quietly and he made sure she was settled back in bed before taking his leave.

"Shiro?"

"Huh?"

"Thank you for being here for me. I know I should be grateful for what time you do spend with me and that you're really busy but I feel really alone when you're not here."

"I'll do what I can, ok?"

"Oh, ok," she said brightening up again.

"Try and get some rest." He said and walked out.

Toshiro headed back to his quarters. He wanted to check on Rukia before heading back to work for the afternoon. He opened the door and found her seated at the table with a cup of tea in front of her.

"Hey," he said closing the door.

"Hey," she said smiling, "I didn't think I would see you today. Would you like some tea?" she asked, getting up.

"I could use some, thank you." He walked up behind her and slipped his arms around her tiny waist as she poured his tea. She placed the pot down and turned into him returning the hold. He pulled her into a tight embrace. Here, everything was fine, everything was right. He loved the way they seemed to fit perfectly together, like they were made for each other. He buried his face in her neck and just held her.

After several minutes he released her. He took his thumb and gently brushed her lips as he looked at her. She felt herself melt into him, his touch burning her skin. He was looking at her intently.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there for you last night. I'm sorry for what you saw today at the 4th. Rukia…"

"I-It's ok."

"No. It's not ok. I don't understand their methods at all and I hate playing games. This deception is wrong." He released her and walked to the table. "I'm so frustrated with this whole thing and I feel it's only going to get worse."

"How is she taking Renji's…Renji's…" she couldn't say it. She's been dealing with it for a while, yet she still couldn't say it. "How is she doing?" she finished quietly.

"She was upset, but she's doing ok. They're having her believe that he died protecting her in the hollow attack at the academy." He looked at her and saw fresh tears brewing in her eyes. He mentally kicked himself for bringing this whole thing up.

"They're going to honor him at the shrine tomorrow." She said quietly.

"Yeah."

"Will she be going too?"

"Yeah."

"I see," she said as she turned towards the pot and his forgotten cup, "Your tea is getting cold."

He sat down at the table. Rukia replaced the tea in his cup and set it in front of him before sitting down. She seemed to have won the battle over her emotions as her face was blank, her eyes dry.

"You said you were going to the 13th yesterday, how is Ukitake?"

"He is better. He told me to take another month off, of course when I told him I'm tired of doing nothing, he wouldn't hear of it. So, I guess I have a month I can dedicate to training." She gave a small smile.

"Good, you'll have a while to ease back into it."

"Humph, I've been easing myself back into it for a few weeks now."

"Before you got clearance?" he shook his head, not surprised at all.

"I can take care of myself." She said defiantly. Her back straightened, her head raised. She is so beautiful, he thought.

"I know you can. However, don't overdo it."

"Yes Sir, Taicho Sir," she said with a grin.

He couldn't help but return the smile. He finished his tea and stood up, "Unfortunately, I have about five stacks of paperwork that I've been neglecting the past few days that isn't going to disappear on its own."

"Ah, would you like some help in getting caught up?"

"Aren't you supposed to be training?"

"Do you need help in getting caught up or would you rather the piles increase until you can't open your door?"

"Are you saying I'm not doing my job?"

"I'm saying with the ceremony tomorrow and mission Momo, when are you going to have time to catch up?"

"If you're that determined to help, I suppose I can't turn you down." He said with a smile, "Come on."

Rukia cleared the table, rinsed the cups out and followed Toshiro.

"You weren't kidding, were you?" Rukia said as she walked in and saw now seven huge stacks of paper piled on his desk.

"Rukia-san!" Matsumoto said getting up from her nap on the couch.

Rukia bowed, "Fukutaicho Matsumoto," she said tersely.

"Matsumoto,"

"Yes, Taicho?"

"You will be accompanying Hinamori for tomorrow's ceremony. Make sure you stay by her side and be there for her."

"Where will you be?"

Toshiro looked at Rukia who was already attacking the first stack of paperwork. "Elsewhere," he replied.

"Do you think that's wise?"

"I don't care."

"Well then. Would it be ok if I took the rest of the afternoon off? I can go visit her and tell her I'll be the one taking her."

"Fine, it's not like you accomplished any work today."

"It was so hard once you left this morning and – "

"Matsumoto…"

"Ok, ok, I'm going. See you later, Taicho, Rukia-san." She said as she left. Rukia didn't notice as she was almost half way through her stack. Toshiro smiled at her and went to work.

"I think Matsumoto is seeing Kurosaki," Toshiro said. Rukia almost spit out her water. She turned around and gave him a funny face.

"Really? What makes you say that?"

"She's been requesting short trips to the living world a lot since we got back."

"Ah," she said.

"Does that bother you?"

"Why would it?" she said as she raised her eyebrow.

"Well," he fumbled. Yeah, why would it bother her?

"Does it bother you?" she asked innocently.

"No, it's not like that relationship would interfere with her work." Rukia snorted.

"And they say you don't have a sense of humor."

"Rukia," was he really going to ask her what's been on his mind? Did he want to know? He didn't want to hear it, but he wanted to know, had to know. "There's a strong bond between you two."

"Yes, there is." She acknowledged.

"Do you love him?"

Flashback:

One evening in Ichigo's room, Rukia was stretched out on his bed. She looked up and studied the carrot topped boy who was sitting at his desk. He was concentrating hard on some random problem that was assigned earlier that day in school. Feeling her eyes on him, he looked over, "What?"

"What?" She replied.

"What what? You're the one sitting there gaping at me like a moron. What do you want?"

"I'm NOT gaping at you. I was just thinking." She replied with a slight pout.

"Ok. I'm going to regret this, but what are you thinking?"

"A few of the girls asked me what our relationship was. They didn't seem to believe that we were just very close friends."

"Uh-huh."

"Ichigo?"

"What now?"

"How do humans go from friendship to something more?" Ichigo turned red and looked away. "Is it as simple as a kiss?"

"What are you talking about?"

"In this manga, two friends kiss and they find out what they have is more than just friendship. Is it as easy as that in the real world?"

"It's just a stupid manga, idiot. Leave me alone, I need to finish these problems."

Sitting up she says, "Ichigo, I want you to kiss me." Ichigo almost gave himself whiplash as he turned around to look at her.

"What kind of…"

"Ichigo, you know we're connected. While mere words can't even begin to describe what we are, these girls have got me curious. Don't you want to know for sure, or are you too scared to kiss me?" She dared.

"Like I want to kiss death." he said as he rolled his eyes. He didn't miss the flash of hurt in her eyes though. In one swift motion, he stood up and took her in his arms, closed his eyes and kissed her. His lips brushed hers as he pulled her closer. She tilted her head, giving him better access and then it happened.

He snorted. She giggled. Then they pulled apart.

"Guess that answers that," she said grabbing her manga.

"Yeah, I guess so, stupid midget."

END FLASHBACK

"I love him, but not in the way you think. It's not a romantic kind of love." Toshiro felt himself breathe. Rukia turned back to her work and smiled.

After only a few hours they were down to three stacks. Toshiro looked outside and noticed the sun start to set. Rukia stood up and stretched. "Would you like to take a break for dinner? We can watch the sunset."

"Aw crap." He said looking at her. She gave him a sad smile.

"You've made other plans."

"Rukia…"

"It's ok. I'll just work on this a little more."

"I'll be back soon." He said as he left. Rukia looked out the window and watched him head towards the 4th. She shook her head then walked back to her pile of paperwork.

"Shiro-chan! I thought you forgot!" Momo said, sitting up. She indicated to the two trays that were set on the chair beside her bed, "It's not much, but we can still enjoy the sunset." She said smiling.

"Did you want to take it to the garden?"

"Oh that would be lovely!"

Toshiro picked up the trays with one hand and held his other out for her to take and lean on. They made their way outside to the garden and sat down the bench. They ate and watched the sun in silence.

"I just love sunsets. They're so peaceful." Momo turned towards Toshiro and blushed. "Shiro-chan… I've been thinking about our relationship and I…I think we're ready to go forward."

Toshiro felt a seed of dread in the pit of his stomach and silently cursed Central 46. "Momo, we're friends and I like it that way."

"But Shiro-"

"Would you stop calling me that? You know I hate it." Toshiro sighed as tears sprang up and fell over onto her cheeks.

"Hitsugaya-kun, what did I do to make you hate me so?"

"Momo, what are you talking about?"

"Matsumoto-san was here earlier telling me that she, not you, will be taking me to the ceremony for Abarai-kun tomorrow and when I said I wanted…wanted to t-take o-our r-r-r-relation-ship fur-fur…" he was not able to make out the rest of what she was saying as she broke down in sobs.

Toshio put his arm around her and pulled her in. She threw her hands around him. Thinking back to when she was in the academy and when he first became captain he took her chin in his hand and tilted her face so she could look at him.

"Momo, I don't hate you. You know I have a lot of responsibility now and I'm still trying to figure everything out. When I have a relationship I want to be able to devote a part of myself to making it better. Now is not the right time as all of my time is spent being a captain and doing captain's duties. There is a lot of work and a lot is expected of me."

"Oh, Shiro I'm so sorry, I never thought…."

"It's ok, Momo."

"No, no, I'm so selfish. Here you are in one of the highest positions in Soul Society with a lot of demands and I just go and put more on you. Can you forgive me?"

"Come on, it's getting too cold for you out here." He led her back to her room and told her good night.

He walked back to his quarters only to find it empty. Curious, he went to his office where he found her.

Rukia was sorting through the last of the piles and had made two small stacks on Toshiro's desk. There were 12 other smaller stacks sitting on Matsumoto's desk.

"What's all this?" he asked.

Rukia indicated to his desk, "High priority items on the left, transfer approvals on the right," she motioned to Matsumoto's desk, "Those need to be delivered to the other divisions in the morning, and these," picking up the last stack, "Is all that's left."

"How did you know to do all of this?"

"Ukitake-taicho has been sick a lot since Kaien-dono died. To take my mind off of his death, he had me help out a lot in the office even though I'm not seated."

"You should be."

"Nii-sama would never allow it."

"You never know, you didn't think he would let you stay with me for a while."

"No, I didn't." She said. They finished the last part of the stacks in silence.

"It's going to be a long day tomorrow, you should get some sleep."

"Toshiro," he looked up from his desk, "I never got a chance to thank you for…for taking me away from Nii-sama's house and…"

Toshiro stood up and took her in his arms. He held her close and whispered, "And I never got to thank you."

"For what?"

"For everything."

Neither felt the presence of someone lurking outside the window, watching the two embrace.

AN: Strap in, the ceremony is next and there will be a few surprises.