Project Naruto: Shinobi X.
Disclaimer: I do not own the Naruto world or characters. Those are the property of Masashi Kishimoto. The challenge I answer here is from devilzxknight86, with all due credit for the basic concept. Battle plans never survive first contact with the enemy... so be the enemy.
Twentieth Seal: Educate.
"We have to do what?" Naruto almost couldn't believe what he'd been told. Hinata and Shino were also surprised by their next mission, but were a bit quieter. Tsunade sighed as she prepared to repeat herself.
"Since I've had to send a jonin team on this mission, and it seemed tailor made for them, I sent Yuhi Kurenai and Mitarashi Anko with Sarutobi Hiruzen to deliver our discoveries to Tetsu no Kuni for impartial evaluation. As a result, I have your team sitting around with nothing to do but train, and since the Academy's standards for our ninja seem to be so lax, I felt that having a team of chunin teaching for the next few weeks would be a good thing. You just happened to be the first on the roster."
"Why is this so important to you, Hokage-sama?" Shino asked. "Usually a chunin who is assigned to teaching duties has some injury or other complication to prevent them from assuming regular duties, or they have chosen that path. While I do not deny that teaching is important, it is difficult to see the cadets as willing to learn from those barely older than themselves."
Tsunade shook her head. "You've caught me there," she admitted. "This mission was also requested by the teacher assigned to a particular class... the entering class this year, who believes that his students would benefit from meeting the Heroes of the Invasion up close."
Naruto nodded, it certainly sounded like Iruka-sensei's line of thinking. Tsunade, however, hadn't finished. "I don't know if you're aware of it, but one of the requirements before a chunin can be promoted is a period of duty at the Academy. Since jonin-sensei must be able to teach effectively, they must learn how, so some time at the Academy is needed to assess that. Each of you will need to figure out what field from the curriculum you will specialise in, and prepare a lesson and grading plan. Shizune will give you some scrolls on the curriculum and possible teaching methods and styles. Dismissed."
On reaching Ichiraku's, Team Kurenai had been discussing the shortcomings of the listed curriculum as compared to what they'd actually been taught. Hinata had decided to snap up the option to teach Chakra Theory and Control, where Naruto knew she'd excel. Shino surprised him by opting for the physical side of the learning, claiming Taijutsu and Weapons as his new domain. Naruto was still glaring at the list of subjects as he devoured his beef ramen. He had an idea, but it had been quite a while since he'd done anything like it... almost four years... no it would be four years in just a few weeks...
Team Ten arrived while they were eating, not such a surprising event, as Otome and Chouji both ate quite a bit, and had convinced Ino that more exercise would help keep the extra food away from her hips. Their last mission, with Shinshi-sensei, had been an escort task for a small caravan, and the bandits they'd faced had been numerous, if not particularly skilled. From the story they told, Ino had been very glad for Shinshi's harsh training on more than one occasion.
On learning of Team Kurenai's next assignment, Ino was startled. "No way! You haven't even been out of the Academy for a year, and the Hokage already wants you to teach?"
"It makes sense, kind of," Chouji said between bowls. "They made a big name for themselves at the Chunin Exams, and the kids at the Academy will have heard a lot about them, maybe enough that they'll pay attention."
Otome frowned a little. She was sure they were overlooking something. "Which class is it?" she asked, hoping to jog her memory that way.
"Entering year," Naruto said. "We're apparently young enough to be a novelty, and old enough that they might listen."
"You mean, the class with Sarutobi Konohamaru and Hyuuga Hanabi, among others?"
Naruto stopped in shock. "You're right..." he realised. "What am I going to do? Jiji-sama's going to kill me..."
"Why?" Hinata asked, and he handed over the sheet with the course he was planning to teach... Stealth, Situational Awareness and Traps.
Team Seven arrived at the gates of Konoha exhausted. The border patrol had not gone as planned, with ambushes and traps laid out for them on the Hi no Kuni side of the border. Most of these were by Kumo nin, although not very strong ones, rather it felt like some kind of test for the Kumo genin. Kakashi's orders had been to return the prisoners they took to Kaminari no Kuni, a task that he'd been able to accomplish by dropping the genin teams into a box on a wagon going that way. His genin had been forced to push themselves as never before, and as far as they were concerned, their relief had not been soon enough.
The masked jonin looked them over. Despite the rigours of their mission, the team was in fairly decent shape, although the curse mark had forced Sasuke to be miserly with his use of chakra and especially his sharingan. If he used either for too long, the black chakra tended to leak into his own. No-one had the least idea of what this stuff was, nor of where it came from, but the effects were... unpleasant enough that avoiding its use was a good plan. He was the worst injured of the team, with a gash on his outer right thigh that they'd barely managed to keep from infection as it slowly healed.
"Now if only I had Naruto's kekkei genkai," Sasuke thought, "then I'd have been healed within seconds, and this whole patrol would have been a walk in the park." Naruto's presence in the Kumo Bingo Book they'd captured had been a startling revelation, as had the rest of Team Kurenai, and the disbelief that they belonged there yet lingered in Team Seven's minds.
Kiba was nursing Akamaru, the poor hound had taken a kunai to the hind leg in their last fight. It wouldn't have been a serious wound for a larger hound, but as it was, Akamaru was unable to walk. "Guys, I have to get home and get Hana to help Akamaru. You take care," he called over his shoulder as he took off.
Kakashi nodded. "I'll take care of the report to the Hokage," he said. "The two of you should visit the hospital, get something to eat, maybe visit the hot springs to relax... Take care and take it easy."
As their jonin-sensei disappeared in a swirl of leaves, Sakura wordlessly offered Sasuke her shoulder as they turned towards the hospital. She'd somehow instinctively figured out the secret behind Tsunade-sama's incredible strength, although not her endurance. She didn't ask or force him to do anything, she was just... there. It was somehow easier to accept, when she was pretending not to offer.
They were passing the Academy when they saw the members of Team Kurenai... well, Hinata and Shino, anyway. Shino was leaning against a tree while Iruka-sensei watched his students. Hinata was demonstrating the leaf-floating technique, but with a difference. "To truly achieve better control," she said as she twirled a leaf over each finger on her hand, "practice until you can manage this, and then..." she paused concentrating a moment, and the leaves began to twirl in opposite directions to their neighbours. Sakura didn't think she could manage that. "This can take a while to master, but if you can manage this, many other techniques will come to you far more easily."
As Sasuke grunted, Naruto stepped out of the shadows behind Hinata, delivering a quick kiss to her cheek, which caused the children to giggle. "Alright," he announced, "I'm Uzumaki Naruto, and I'll be teaching you the last third of our lesson. Now, all of you have different levels of and control of your chakra, and Shino already covered the regular combat arts, so I'm going to teach you the equalizer, the art of fighting without being there, and how to maintain situational awareness. Each of you has a number on a note taped to your back that I put there a few minutes ago. These numbers will tell you your teams for this exercise." He pulled out a scroll and unsealed a number of boxes. "The teachers here will recall the days when I was a terrible prankster, pulling pranks on ANBU, villagers and shinobi alike. It would make people angry when I caught them like that, and then I would get chased all over the village. After my... abduction... I became a bit more serious, and it came to me that had I chosen, the harmless pranks could have been so much worse. Substitute exploding tags for the paint I used, and we wouldn't have such a wonderful monument of the Hokages to admire." At this, every child looked up at the mountain. Naruto smiled, a foxy grin that conveyed a sense of great mischief. "The key to all pranks is that they are simply non-lethal traps, intended to amuse everyone... except the poor person caught in them. You need to plan. Remember this: Prior planning prevents poor performance."
As the class chorused after the blond youth's words, Sasuke snorted... but not contemptuously, as might once have been the case. As he and Sakura continued their journey to the hospital, he spoke. "I wonder if the Hokage realises exactly what she's let Konoha in for."
The biggest gossip around the village, Ino found, involved the name Uzumaki in one way or another. If the people discussing the name were older, there was often puzzlement in the voices, or someone firmly setting out some information. If they were younger, it was awe, almost hero worship in some cases, especially if the kids involved were of an age for the Academy. Shino seemed to be granted status as an 'Honorary Uzumaki' as far as they were concerned, and the lessons their team taught were talked into the ground. As for those people of their own age, the talk often centred around the surprise of their marriage. The new Team Eight and their sensei, Tsuru Shikunshi, were originally the team from Kumo that had taken part in the Chunin Exams before defecting... and now there were other Kumo nin here, but whether they would stay Kumo or not was a matter of much discussion, and once again the Uzumaki name was right in the middle.
As the blonde kunoichi hated to be the last with the news, even if all she wanted to do was say "Oh, that," dismissively, she had begun to research the name... There were only two entries in the records before Naruto, although now there were three others, a total of six, but Ino felt she could safely disregard them at this point. Uzumaki Mito had been the Shodaime's wife, taking up the Senju name, and she had died something over thirty years ago... at over a hundred years of age! The exact age was not recorded, but she'd been part of Konoha for at least that long. Still, she was unlikely to have any direct connection to Naruto.
The other Uzumaki was named Kushina, and originally came from Uzushiogakure no Sato... like Mito... for an unspecified reason, and remained here until her death on October tenth, almost fourteen years ago now. Just two weeks shy of it, in fact. She paused... and flicked the pages of the registry to Naruto's name. Born... October tenth... almost fourteen years ago. Flipping the pages back to the entry for Kushina, she checked the cause of death... Childbirth complications...
But wasn't October tenth that year the day the Kyuubi attacked? What did that have to do with these two? Setting these questions aside, she began reading and taking notes, locating all the information she could on the woman who was most likely Naruto's mother.
Tsunade looked at the complaints that had piled up on her desk, and turned to Naruto. "Do you see that?" she asked, pointing. He nodded. "So explain to me why I'm getting all these complaints from citizens of Konoha, please. They all seem to be the sorts of things you used to get up to, and that's why I wanted to speak to you."
Naruto smiled. "While I did not perform any of the actions that engendered these reports and complaints, I freely admit that I have had a hand in their conception and execution," he said, placing a copy of his 'lesson plan' on the desk. At first glance it seemed to be a list of pranks and mischief, but then he provided a list of substitutions for the components that nearly turned Tsunade white. "I'm teaching them Stealth, Situational Awareness and Traps," he went on, "and any of the pranks that they have performed could easily have been a lethal trap set in its place. Contact poisons in place of itching powder, explosive tags instead of paint, razor wire instead of trip-cords... and my students have been tested on harder targets each week... sort of grading assignments. If they do get busted, they have to run, which also helps their fitness and evasion skills. I make sure they're not caught outright, and I grade their work on the Monday. If you have this many complaints... ask how their security was so poor that Academy first-years could find ways around it."
Tsunade turned to face the young man she'd always seen as something of a grandson for the past five years or so. "When do you test them on the Hokage's residence?"
Naruto shrugged. "Someone has to prank Anko successfully first."
Naruto had arranged the class so they worked in four-member teams, with a randomly chosen leader. In the group that wound up bearing the number eight, this turned out to be Konohamaru. The luck of the draw had his cadet-team consisting of his closest friends, Udon, Moegi and finally Hanabi. As a team, they meshed incredibly well. Udon was a good strategist and long-term planner, Hanabi made a superlative scout, Moegi had memorised several variations of each prank that used the materials they brought with them and showed a genius with improvised materials, and Konohamaru had an instinctive grasp on improvised tactics when things went sour.
Like now for instance. They'd managed the planning, and snuck into their target's apartment, and Hanabi had kept an eye out while Moegi directed the boys in placing the prank. Hanabi's hissed warning alerted them to the target's return, and Udon and Moegi got away clean, but Hanabi was caught in the open and panicking... Konohamaru had plenty of time to escape, but that tiny part of him that had thrown him between this girl and that missing nin was in charge, apparently, as he quickly moved to her side and planted his lips on hers like he'd seen Naruto-nii-san do to his wife, just as the door opened.
Mitarashi Anko was astounded to see two kids kissing in the middle of her living room, and paused. "Sorry, must have the wrong door," she said closing it behind her as she pulled back. Then she checked the number, and realised it was her apartment, but by the time the door was open, the two brats had gone. Muttering she went to get herself some dango from her fridge... dango that had been treated with a serve of wasabi...
At the scream that echoed across the village, Naruto turned to Tsunade. "That'll be next weekend, then, Tsunade-sama," he said, as the Hokage pushed back her hat and dropped her face into her palm.
"K-Kono-kun," Hanabi said quietly. "Why'd you kiss me?"
"I'm sorry I had to kiss you there, Hana-chan," the boy said. "It should have been some place special, and I should have asked, but it was an emergency and you froze up and I had to do something... I hope this doesn't make you mad..."
Hanabi thought carefully. That had been how Onee-chan kissed Naruto-nii, she knew. It... wasn't bad. "It was kind of nice... The next one had better be in the right place and time, then."
Konohamaru's mind blanked as they hurried to meet the other two. "Next one?" he thought, and a goofy smile spread across his face...
"Hanabi has been telling me about the lessons you are giving at the Academy," Hiashi said, as his eldest daughter carefully and precisely prepared the tea. Naruto preferred coffee, but there was something relaxing in the ceremony, she found. He'd learned how, for her, but it was still far and away more her style than his. Now, she offered her father the tea.
"What exactly is it that concerns you about this, father?" she asked as he sipped gently at the brew after the requisite pause for contemplation. "Have I done anything wrong?"
"No," he replied. "Far from it, you have instituted a grand change, one I had failed to convince the Hyuuga elders to permit. Your mother believed that the cadets would benefit from instruction in our chakra control exercises, but the elders forbade her from teaching them... something they seem to have forgotten to do with you. And now it is far too late for them to forbid you anything, as they have no authority over the Uzumaki. It is well, daughter. It is well."
They sat there for a while, sipping their tea, with Hinata basking in the glow of her father's pride in her, and waited for Naruto to return.
Ino was patient and careful, with her plan forming quietly. Her first accomplice had been successfully recruited within days of her locating the information on Naruto's mother, and at that accomplice's suggestion, she had expanded her list to a large number of Academy students and the Hokage, as well as a number of others from around the village, and she was waiting for the last three possible accomplices to invite into this little conspiracy. As the trio of targets entered the village, she approached them, putting her request in quick, simple terms, to which they agreed.
As Ino walked away, knowing the preparations that were taking place, she smirked. "Soon, Uzumaki Naruto," she mused, "soon you will get exactly what you deserve..."
Naruto woke on a day he normally considered the worst in his life, to find himself strapped firmly into a chair in a dark room. He wasn't alone, he could hear the others, and with a bit of effort, smell them too. No-one was scared or fearful, and there were no scents that he associated with stress, pain or other things to be expected from captivity. A single candle lit, and Ino stood before him. "Uzumaki Naruto," she said solemnly. "There has been a great injustice arrayed against you. Those of us here gathered stand here to make this right. I am the one responsible, and so I am the one to lead you through this night, a rite that each and every one of us, save only you, has been subject to." A second candle lit, revealing Hinata, and Ino continued. "Despite the darkness of your life, you have found a companion, someone to show you how to walk in the light of love, and you had the good sense not to let her go when you stumbled into her heart." Shino appeared, illuminated by his lightning kikaichu, and Kurenai lit her candle. "When others saw you as you should have been seen all along, and accepted you for who you are, you did not push them away. You valued them, and grew stronger for them and for their own sakes you helped them grow as well." Ino signalled to everyone in the room, and they all lit their candles. "Everyone here has been touched by your life in one way or another, and we have all come together for this most solemn rite."
Naruto was starting to worry, now, as things seemed to be getting serious. What injustice did these people set themselves to right that would be this dire, that it took all the people whose lives he'd touched? As each and every person in the room drew in their breath, he braced himself for the worst... as they began to sing. "Happy Birthday to you..."
After he'd been set loose by Hinata and kissed and hugged soundly, he guessed it could have been worse. Hinata had to have helped the pranksters, or he would have woken in a moment at the unfamiliar scents, and Ino had been the instigator of the event, so Naruto's first real birthday party could be considered a success... even if the usual festival was going on outside. The presents tended towards the practical... jutsu scrolls, dining vouchers, even Tenten gave him a voucher for a free weapon fitting at her father's store that covered both him and Hinata. Ino's gift however, a collaboration with several jonin and the Hokage, was different. A large book, an album of pictures and stories... about one Uzumaki Kushina. The book was only half-filled, though. "I'm sorry Naruto," Ino said. "I tried, but I couldn't find anything about your dad, not even his name."
Naruto waved aside her apologies. "I'm sure several people know who he is, Ino," he said. "I know his name, and why he's stayed a secret, and exactly what it means. Maybe someday I can tell everyone, but for now... for now he has to stay a secret." He held his Hinata-hime close and tight. He'd shared the secret with her and she'd agreed, if reluctantly, with his reasoning. Still, it was a good night, he felt.
Anko was staring at him. "How do you do it?" she asked, and he quirked an eyebrow up to invite her to clarify. "I bribed your star pupils, the ones who pranked me, to put laxatives in your drink, and they should be kicking in now. So how?" She took a swig from her cup.
"Oh, that," he said off-handedly. "I switched cups with you."
Naruto looked at the grades he'd assigned for everyone in his class. Shino had found the various students one of the several styles in Konoha that suited them, and although for most that was the standard Academy style, there were others for whom this didn't fit. Udon, as an example, was better suited to an improvised weapon art, whereby anything from paper-clips to chairs, garden tools to ladders, could become a deadly weapon. He set him some exercises of an interesting nature: any room he walked into, Udon had to find ten things he could use to attack an enemy. The boy was managing a solid eight out of ten, and blending it with Academy style taijutsu. He pointed Hanabi towards her sister, as well, for the Hyuuga girl was better suited to the Gentle Storm that Hinata was developing than the main Gentle Fist style.
Hinata's classes had obvious results, as her students were well on their way to mastering the leaf-floating exercise. Even Konohamaru had managed it with one leaf, and several had progressed to two, while Hanabi had four, and was now working on their direction.
Perhaps it wasn't surprising that Naruto's class had become the most popular amongst the students. An entire course wherein you not only were taught how to prank people, but got graded on how well you did? What kid wouldn't love it? Add to that a teacher who gave extra credit for pranking him, and it was a recipe for instant success. It was as he was about to leave as his last class finished that Konohamaru interrupted his exit.
"Naruto-sensei, wait," he called, and the blond shinobi turned, as the class rose as one.
"Naruto-sensei," they chorused, as they bowed deeply. "Thank you very much."
"It has been my honour," he replied in a voice that hitched on the last syllable, and as he left the room, only Hinata saw the lone tear of happiness as it made its way down his cheek.