"I am not proud of everything, I've done, Belle." Catelyn said. "I was never supposed to marry Ned, I was supposed to marry his elder brother, so when he died, and war came…I was wed to him, the next Lord of Winterfell for my father's men. Just like you." Catelyn took a long drink of wine, Belle knew she missed her late husband. "He much much like I suspect Robb was. He also did not have us have a bedding ceremony, and he was nothing but kind and gentle. He left a baby in my belly and went off to war. I was sent here for safekeeping."

Belle nodded, listening intently.

"When the war was over, he returned. I was holding our son, and he was holding his. They were the same age. Robb took after me, but that boy my husband held? He was all Stark, and that scared me. In the following year, I had Sansa. Two years later, I had Arya. I love—loved my girls with all my heart, but I also feared for them. What if something happened to Robb? What if something happened to Ned? What if he gained loyalty and when the time for succession came and more wanted him? Northerners are loyal, but as with everywhere they prefer looking to men to lead? What if he grew up to hate my children? More than once has a bastard killed a true born child. What would happen to my girls?"

"That is all very understandable." Belle said. "I could only imagine what I would do if someone threatened my children."

Catelyn nodded. Belle pretending not to notice her thin hands shaking.

"I excluded the child from everything. I did not want him at feasts. I did not stop him from being with his brothers and sisters. Arya was particularly fond. Robb and him were close. But I could not bring myself to get close to him. But, when he first showed up, I wished he would just die so I could have had the life I was supposed to. I was young and stupid, and I truly did not mean it. But, the child did fall ill with the pox. I did not realize how little I meant it until he fell ill. I prayed to the gods to heal him, I promised them that I would start treating him like a son, if I could not get him legitimized, I would treat him as such. He could have become a knight with that. He could be at his brother's side at war now instead of at the Watch. Or he could be protecting his children." Catelyn paused now, a long pause where they both sat in silence. Belle did not know what to say.

"He was Arya's favorite." She said, speaking of the daughter they had yet to see a trace of. "He would play rough with her. We kept trying to make her a lady, but she always had other ideas, and he would humor her. He enjoyed humoring her. She loved her siblings, even though she fought with Sansa daily. But, there was no doubt that Jon was her favorite. He also could have gone with my husband south. But then his head would be on the outskirts of the Red Keep as well." She sighed. "What I mean to say, Belle, is that I looked at this from a Southern perspective—the North is loyal. Jon is loyal. That's what I want to tell you."

"Do you think he would let anything happen to Sansa while she is at Castle Black?" Belle asked.

"He would never let anything happen to his siblings if he could control it." Catelyn said.

Belle sighed, sitting back in her chair. "I have much to think about now. But thank you for telling me this."

"At least someone knows now." Catelyn said. "I could not burden my own children with this."

"I know." Belle said. "Thank you."

XXX

Theon was being kept from the rest of his men. Belle asked for this and she was thankful that no one asked her why. He was locked in a room with two guards at the door. Belle was walking there after she had put her children to sleep. She wanted to know if he ever was her friend. He had held her children. He had kissed her hand. He had called her his queen. Was it all for show? Did he not care for her at all? They were not friends in the beginning, but after some time she began to see him as one. She thought herself a good judge of character.

"Open the door." Belle told the guards.

They paused only a moment, looking down at the pitcher of wine in one of her hands and before unlocking and opening the door for her.

"Knock when you want to be let out and if he does anything, scream. We will be at your side in a second." The elder of the soldiers said.

"Thank you." Belle said before entering the room. Theon was standing by the window, looking out of the small space. It was much too small for anyone to crawl out of.

"I don't see any gallows being set up." He said. "Do I get to decide how I die?" He looked behind him and saw Belle standing there, in one of her finer gowns with her hair in a curtain around her and her hands folded on her stomach. She knew, for maybe the first time, she looked like the queen she was supposed to be.

"You did not expect me to come?" Belle asked softly. "I believe I was the first one you sought out when you took Winterfell from me. Why shouldn't I seek you out after I take it back?"

"Because it's been at least a week, Belle." He said. "I thought I would be dead by now."

"You have a merciful queen." Belle said, looking around. It was not a room that he would have been used to, but it was much better than the cells the other iron born were in. There was a table with two chairs by the fire. Bell walked there and set down the cups before pouring the wine. "Sit." She told him.

"Why am I getting such special treatment?" He asked.

"Sit and perhaps you will find out." Belle took her seat of the two, closer to the fire.

He walked towards the small table and sat across from her. "What is it you want from me, Belle."

"I want to know why." She said.

"I already told you why." He said.

"You said why you took the castle." She said. "I thought we were friends, Theon. You were outside the room at the birth of my children. You held my children. You asked if I wanted a letter delivered to my husband, and not too many months later you take the castle from them? From me? Did you fake being my friend for months just to pull that?"

"I never faked being your friend." He said.

"Then how did you do it?" Belle asked. "You knew the Starks loved you. My husband called you brother. He trusted you in bringing me here when I carried his children inside me. Even when I didn't like you I trusted you."

He didn't look at her. His eyes were fixed on the table.

"So you're ashamed, I don't know if that's a good or bad sign." Belle said. "What did you expect to happen?"

"I don't know." He said. "I just knew I could do it, at least for a little while. I thought I would make my father proud."

"Do you even know your father?" Belle asked.

He paused. "No."

"Do you like him?"

He paused again. "No."

"If anyone here knows something about hating fathers, that's me, Theon. I'm the only person asking why, and I want to know the answer, no matter what it is." Belle said.

"Your father made you a queen."

"I was the price that Robb had to pay for a bridge. My father didn't care if he was good, or cruel, or anything. He only cares that his grandchildren will be princes and princesses. That he is closer to the throne, and has a king for an ally. I never mattered in the match." Belle told him. "My father did not ask my opinion on anything. All he said to me were warnings. I better make him happy. I should shut up. It was never about me. My father did not ask or even care if Robb was good. If this war had not happened, I would have probably been given to any man who showed interest."

"You could have been given to me." He said quietly.

"You would have never chosen me." Belle replied. "So you were jealous then, is that it? Is that why you took Winterfell? What is there to be jealous of?"

"Plenty." He said. "I felt sorry for Robb for all of an hour before your wedding until I actually saw you."

"Rosalyn is prettier." Belle said.

"No," he said with a small shake of his head, "she's not."

"You hated me. That's what I thought." Belle said. "You treated me with enough distain. Robb said you were jealous, but I didn't believe him."

"Robb knew?" He shook his head.

"We only talked about it once." Belle told him. "I said you did not seem like the type to want a spirited wife. He said that may be true, but you did want a beautiful one."

He stayed looking down.

"So, is that it, then? You lust for me? That's why you made all those jokes of me getting fucked?" Belle asked. "Is that why you wanted control of this place? Is that why you wanted to control me? Make me eat with you and your men. Make me sit on your lap?"

"Not lust." He said softly, but Belle was not sure she heard him right.

"Sorry, what was that?"

"It wasn't lust." He said. "Or, it may have started out that way, but things changed."

"Don't tell me you love me. You couldn't do something like that to someone you loved."

"You can do terrible things to people you love." He said softly, his eye looking up to hers before lowering again. "I did not make you submit to me."

"You mean that you did not rape me?" Belle asked. "Am I supposed to be grateful?"

"I didn't—I didn't mean it like that." He said.

"What? Did you imagine that I would come to your bed willingly? Ask you so nicely on my knees to give me my husband's home back? Who do you think I am? That surely, is not me." Belle said, a bite in her voice, but she kept it in check. She wanted answers. She just did not feel like she was getting them. "Women have more power than what is between their legs."

"As you have so proven." Theon said.

"So, you did this to get into my bed?" Belle asked.

"No, that got into my head later." He said. "I wanted to make my father proud. I went back to the Iron Islands and it—it fucked me, Belle." He let out a breath. "He did not treat me as a father should a son. Ned treated me better. I just wanted to be a good son."

This was the first thing he said that Belle truly believed. Perhaps it was his defeated tone, or how he just sounded so tired. Or it was how she saw his eyes water just a bit before he reigned himself in. She pitied him. "You are so misguided, Theon." Belle said. "Did you ever feel like you were doing the wrong thing?"

"The entire time. But it was too late to go back."

"It's never too late." Belle said.

"When you decide how I die, let it be quick, please." Theon said.

"You're only going to die if you choose it." Belle told him. "You still have options. You can choose to die, or you can go to Castle Black and live out your days there."

"Jon will kill me." Theon said.

"Jon Snow?" She smiled a bit. "His name is coming up quite often today. He will not, you have my word."

"Why the watch?"

"We've been getting ravens asking for more men." Belle said. "I am just trying to help them guard the realms of men." She paused. "This could be your penance, Theon. You know that you're a skilled fighter. It would also mean that no one can kill you in my name. Even my husband will not be able to get revenge on you."

"Why?"

"Because the Night's Watch is not involved in Politics."

"No, I mean, why are you still being kind to me? After everything?"

"Because, when I said you were my friend I meant it. I cannot watch you die, or be the cause of your death." Belle told him. "Go to the Watch. Please."

"I will do as my queen commands." He said, still looking down.

Belle rose, leaving the wine behind. When she walked passed him, he grabbed her wrist.

"I do love you." He said.

Belle did not know what to say to that. He kissed the back of her hand while he squeezed her fingers tightly. He let her go then.

Belle left the room, knocking to be set free and making it down the hall before running into her sister.

"Are you okay?" She asked, looking very concerned as she looked over her younger sister.

"What are you doing here?" Belle asked.

"I saw you walking down here. You have always needed answers, Belle. Did you get what you needed to hear?"

Belle shook her head, tears welling up in her eyes.

"Did you get answers?"

Belle nodded, tears slipping from her eyes as she let out a whimper. Jane's arms went around her, shushing her, and guiding her back into her rooms, where she spent the rest of the night. She knew in the morning she would have to meet with her advisors.

XXX

"It will make you look weak, my queen." Lord Bolton pleaded with Belle. "Letting the men that took your home free?"

"Not free. If they do not go to the wall they will be put to death." Belle said. "But the Watch needs men. We have a few here that are able bodied fighters. I think they can use them."

"Against stories wet nurses tell children?"

"We do not know what they face every day, Lord Bolton, neither of us are brother's of the Watch." Belle said. "From what I know, the ravens are coming from noble members of the Night's Watch. Jeor Mormont is a Northman. I doubt he would be asking unless he believed they needed it." She looked to Catelyn, who gave her a small nod that no one else would notice.

"My queen, please heed my advice." Lord Bolton said.

"I have, my lords." She said. "I have looked at all my options. This is the one I feel will have the best outcome. Any of the men run while you travel, they will be shot down. Any try to leave after you leave, they will be shot down."

"At least kill Theon Greyjoy as an example."

"Theon Greyjoy will be the greatest example. He will be faithful to the Watch." Belle said.

"How are you so sure?" Lord Bolton asked.

"I am, that is all anyone needs to know." Belle said. "The Ironborn will be told today. They will have until dawn to decide their fate. At dawn those who refuse will be killed. Those who agree, will be going to Castle Black in a week's time. That should give everyone here enough time to recuperate after such an eventful month. We will begin working on those plans tomorrow. I would like to keep at least a hundred soldiers here from now on."

"Yes, your grace." Ser Roderick said.

Belle took a deep breath to calm her, but in her lap, her hands were shaking.

XXX

Sansa, Belle, and Jane were all playing with little Eddard and Katharina in Belle's solar. Bran was in bed. Rickon was falling asleep in his mother's lap. He hadn't had a nap that day and he was tired.

Belle's children were walking now. The three of them figured out that they could get them to teeter over to their mother with wobbly little steps just to get their mother's embrace and splattering of kisses over their faces. Sansa and Jane would pick them up from her and take them a few feet away before watching them run to their mother again. They knew it was a game and they would giggle all through it.

It was times like this that made Belle miss her husband. She could only imagine her husband getting on the floor to play with them. She could only imagine them pacing the floor to get them to go to sleep. All the things she wished she had as a child. But her husband was at war. He would not be able to pace the floor with the infants. He missed their first steps, and he missed them babbling at her, though Belle wasn't sure they were words yet, they did babble all the time. They babbled and laughed as they ran to their mother. They babbled as she, and their aunts kissed their cheeks. She just wished her husband could be there with her.

"I remember when you father used to play with us." Sansa said to her mother. "Or when you were teaching Rickon how to walk."

Her mother smiled, as the young women looked over at her. "You used to get on your fathers back and ride him like he was your horse."

Sansa returned her smile. "Remember when he would rough-house with the boys?"

Catelyn nodded, her eyes turning to Belle. "I'm sure Robb would do the same with the twins when he returns home."

"I hope the war is over in time." Belle said. "I would love him to see them as small children."

"One day." Catelyn said. "Let us hope it is very soon."

"He would let them ride him around." Sansa said. "He used to carry Rickon on his shoulders around the castle."

"I would love to see that." Belle said. "I can only imagine how that was."

"I was so scared Robb would drop him. Mostly when he ran." Catelyn said. "Rickon was what? Three at the time?"

"Something like that." Sansa said.

"How old did that make Robb?" Belle asked. "Fifteen? Sixteen?"

"Yes." Sansa said. "It was…before everything."

The mood in the room changed from joyful to somber.

"I'm sorry." Belle said. "You do not deserve all that has happened to your family."

"As is life." Catelyn said. "At least we have had a few good things happen. I have a new daughter. My husband has a good wife. I have two healthy grandchildren."

Belle gave Catelyn a small smile, thanking her for the sentiment. "And hopefully a war won."

"We will all continue praying for that."

XXX

"My daughter has changed." Catelyn whispered to Belle as they readied to hear what the iron born would choose as their fate.

"I am sure. Going through what she has." Belle said. "She's a woman now."

"You want to let her go to the Wall." Catelyn said. "You want to train her like we're training you."

"I think she will be more than capable." Belle said. "She will be safe, and it will give her some power, I think."

"Why does she need power?"

"Because she did not have any in her years at the capital." Belle said. "If she can prove to herself that we find worth in her, I think she will be better off for it. Since you are all sure that Jon Snow will not let any harm come to her, I will trust him as well."

"Are you basing this off your own experiences?" Catelyn asked. "Choosing to go to war. Helping the soldiers. Being a Queen now. Did that give you worth you did not think you had?"

Belle nodded. "Women have to go through so much in this world because of their sex. Why can we not feel powerful sometimes too."

"In moments like this I realize how blessed I was with my upbringing." Catelyn said. "I wish I could have protected my daughters."

"As I hope to protect mine."

"I know you will not tell me everything you and Sansa talk about, but if she is ever in danger, I need you to tell me."

"Trust me, you will have my word." Belle said. "And if there is ever a time that she needs protection and you are not there, I will do anything and everything in my power to keep her protected."

"Thank you."

XXX

Only three men chose to die rather than go to the wall. Belle was surprised. She thought more would choose death. It seems they did not want to die. They would leave in a few days, just enough time to tell Sansa what she wanted.

"I want you to document everything you see." Belle told her when they were in her solar after the children had been put to bed. "Not just what they report to you, but what you notice." Belle gave her a leather bound book that was full of blank pages.

"Do you not trust the information they are sending?"

"I don't like going into things without knowing what I am getting into." Belle told her. "We are already in one war. I want to know what's going on there before I send ravens to Robb."

"You are not going to make this decision without him?"

"How can I? I do not know how to plan a war or battles." Belle said. "The only thing I can do is get information and present it to him. That's all I've ever done."

"But you're queen."

"Barely. I was not raised to be. Robb was raised to be a lord not a king. I think we are both trying to figure that out." Belle paused. "It's one of the things we have in common."

Sansa nodded. "How long did it take you to figure out that he was just doing his best?"

Belle smiled a bit. "Not long. But it's important to be able to be vulnerable with someone who won't betray you. That is what a good marriage is. Robb would never betray me, and I will never betray him. Just as he would never betray you. Just as I would never betray anyone in your family."

"Just as we would not betray you." Sansa said.

"That's it." Belle said. "Now, one last thing." Belle pulled a small dagger out with a belt that would go around her waist.

"I don't know to use it." Sansa said.

"Neither did I when I used one for the first time." Belle said. "It saved me. All you need is a man who does not think you have it in you to defend yourself to give you a chance."

"When did you have to use it?" Sansa asked, slowly reaching for it before turning it over in her hand, and taking it out of its sheath.

"It might remind you of things you don't want to remember." Belle told her.

"Tell me anyway." Sansa said, still looking down.

"All right, but this does not leave this room. I don't need my father to find out." Belle said. "I was thirteen…"

XXX

Sansa stayed with Belle that night, and was with her at dawn when the raven came. Maester Luwin came to her room while they were still sleeping. Belle put on her dressing gown and answered the door.

"It's from Riverrun and from the Twins." Maester Luwin said, giving Belle the small scroll. Belle read them once. Twice. Three times.

"What is it?" Sansa asked softly.

"Your uncle is marrying my sister for several thousand men is the simple story." Belle said. "And my father is sending for me. I am to be in attendance as I am queen." She knew what this is code for. "Obviously Robb will have to be there as well. I think my father fears his head may turn now that I am away from the front."

"Robb won't." Sansa said. "He saw what my father's infidelity did to my mother."

"It doesn't matter. I must remain first in my husband's favor for my father to climb the ladder of power." Belle said. "According to this scroll, I leave in a week's time at the latest. It depends on how fast my father's convoy will take to get here. I'll take Jane with me. She will want to see Rosalyn be wed."

"There must always be a Stark in Winterfell." Sansa said.

"There will be." Belle said. "My children. Bran, Rickon. Your mother may want to come, but I do not know if she will. She may want to stay with her grandchildren. And you will be back soon enough."

"And who will make the decisions while you are gone?"

"Catelyn is more than capable. You know this. When you return, you will help her." Belle said. "I will not be gone long. A few weeks at most. Nothing too dramatic can happen in that time." Or that is what she hoped. If she were honest with herself, she wanted to see her husband again. She wanted to feel him again in her arms. Be able to see that he was all right. She hadn't seen her husband in over a year now, and she missed him like she could not believe.

"We must all meet, then. Figure out what will happen." Sansa said.

"Yes, we should." Belle said. "Thank you, Maester Luwin. I would like us all to meet after we break fast to come up with a plan as well as a back up plan in case I am delayed in the Riverlands.

"Yes, your grace." Maester Luwin said. "

"That is all, for now." Belle said. "Thank you so much for coming to me so promptly."

He gave a small bow. "Of course, your grace."

XXX

Belle stood in the courtyard to see Sansa taking off with many an armed guard and the prisoners. Theon was among them. Belle could tell he was ashamed. Theon barely looked up from the ground. He would not dare meet her eyes, let alone Sansa or Catelyn's. Belle tried to ignore it. She did pity him.

"Remember what I said." Belle told her.

"Write everything down." Sansa said.

"And more importantly, make sure you are always safe." Belle said. "I would rather not have all the information than have you in danger."

Sansa nodded the sort of nod that made Belle question whether Sansa would listen to her or not.

Belle embraced the taller yet younger girl, and gave her a kiss on the cheek before releasing her. "I will see you when we both return."

"Tell my brother I love him and he better be coming home soon." Sansa said. "I do miss him."

"I promise." Belle said.

"And if he sends you home with another babe in your belly I demand to be here to see my next little niece or nephew." Sansa said, stepping away from Belle and getting onto her horse.

"Sansa!" Belle laughed.

"I am only saying." Sansa said, a bright smile on her lips. "I will see you soon, sister."

"Be safe." Belle commanded her again. "I would hate to lose a sister so recently gained."

The party left, Sansa between two armed men, leading the way. Belle waited until they were out of sight before leaving. She saw Catelyn watching from the balcony above. She gave Belle a nod. Belle nodded in turn.

XXX

Belle was given a Clydesdale to ride south on the day before her journey. It was very large for Belle's small stature. Catelyn said it was to remind everyone of her standing. She then took Belle into a barred and locked room deep into the castle.

"The Starks have ruled the North for thousands of years." Catelyn said while they were going through the series of locked doors.

"I know." Belle said.

"We still have the wealth that brought." Catelyn said. "We just rarely use it."

"Where are you taking me?"

"To the crown jewels." Catelyn said. "Robb has a crown. It is about time you have been given one for events such as this as well. We must remind others that we are all royalty now."

"Why now?"

"Because you have won your first battle." Catelyn said. "You led your first attack. You won."

"I wouldn't have been able to without help."

"Does anyone ever do anything on their own? No. Everyone needs help. But succeeding at leading is a good test." Catelyn said. "You succeeded with minimal loss of life on either side. You won a battle, Belle." She opened a final door and was shown to a modest amount of jewels, as far as crown jewels went. She was sure the Lannisters in the south had much more, but they were something to behold.

"Oh my." Belle said, walking inside.

Most of them were bronze, she could tell. Robb's crown was bronze. It just made sense that her crown would be bronze as well. There were necklaces, crowns, rings, some with jewels, some without.

"I have picked a few for you. Understated, but I think they would be beautiful on your hair." Catelyn said, bringing her to the center table where three crowns stood. All of them were bronze. One would be a circlet, a thin band that would wrap around her forehead. The second was another circlet, but one made of thorns. The final one was small, all harsh lines and was obviously feminine with the pins that were in it to go into hair. Belle gravitated towards that one.

"I thought you may like that one." Catelyn said, lifting it and laying it on her head, she took Belle to a mirror.

Belle admired herself, the small crown was darker than her hair and stood out beautifully. She could only imagine if she did her hair up in a style how it would look. It did not take up much room, but it was obvious what it was.

"Yes, I think this will do." Belle said, and Catelyn smiled.

"Perfect."

XXX

It was snowing when the Night's Watch opened the gates for Sansa and her men. The light was just beginning to fade. Sansa's head was held high, a wolf stitched on her dress to announce to everyone her birth and her allegiance. Her red hair was braided back, giving her her own crown on her head. A red crown. She was at the front now, the first to be seen, and the first through the gates. The men stared at her, she knew it was probably because she was the first woman they had seen in a long time. What surprised her was that there were men not only in black pelts there, but all sorts of pelts. On second glance there were women there as well. And children.

A man came towards her. Followed by a woman with long dark red hair and a red dress.

"You're Sansa Stark." The man said. He was older, in his forties. He had just started balding from what she could tell. He had a long face.

"I am." Sansa said. "I am here to see my brother, Jon Snow."

"I'm Edd." He said. "I knew your brother. I am so sorry."

"Where is my brother?" Sansa asked. She hated when people apologized to her. It usually meant something happened she did not want to hear. "Where is he?"

"He was killed last night."

A/N: I AM SO SORRY FOR DISAPPEARING! I do have an excuse. I was out of town, then out of country and when I got back I was really sick and couldn't miss work. Anyway, this is the first day I haven't truly been dying. But! I do have good news! I plan to have Fridays as my update day to keep on a schedule. This may not be true for this upcoming Friday, but it will definitely begin 6/21. My upcoming week is probably going to be insane, but it should also give me a step up for updating.

A GIANT THANK YOU TO MY REVIEWERS! darkwolf76, Crystal-Wolf-Guardian-967, jean d'arc, waterbender19, guest, tiffanyd090, and guest. Ya'll are such a big help to my writing and your reviews help me have the confidence to show my writing to others. This would not be written without ya'll.

Please review!

Kat