Shattered Mind - Part 20– (Month 6 / week 4 still)

Month 6 / week 4 Still

Passing the barn, heading towards the tree line, April started to wonder how far the brothers went, she hoped Raph didn't do anything to him deep within the bush or it will take hours to find Mikey.

Reaching the tree line she couldn't see anything ahead of her, with a sigh, she looked at Donnie who had become fascinated by a ladybug on a leaf, placing his finger near it, the ladybug went onto his finger as he looked it over.

Before April could say something, a muffled, came from somewhere nearby as April looked about, uncertain where it came from, "Donnie do you hear that?"

With a nod Donnie looked around in wonder what was making that strange sound, then his ladybug took flight, he started to pout sadly for it leaving.

As he watched the lady bug take to the air, he saw him, pointing up the tree; Donnie patted April on the shoulder, "There."

April froze as she gazed up, there, tied upside down with some rope, Mikey dangled in the air, as the rope twisted around a branch above him then to the trunk of the tree.

Mikey's bandana was around his mouth, which would explain the muffling, the only visible way to get him down was to climb the tree and untie the rope that was around the trunk and slowly lower him down.

(… This… huh?!)

"Donnie no!" April stopped Donnie from attempting to climb the tree, a bit uncertain, he looked at her not sure why she stopped him.

"I will do it, I know how to climb trees, I use to all the time when I was a child. Just stay here and stay under him in case the rope gives, you're stronger than me, so you would be better at catching him than me." April explained as Donnie looked wary, but did what she told him.

(Why the hell did Raph do this to Mikey!)

Taking her time and watching her footing, April started to climb the tree, taking note on the fact, the wind was starting to pick up, she didn't know how long the branch that held Mikey in place would hold.

If it did break, Mikey would go face first into the trunk of the tree and could get seriously hurt.

Finally reaching the rope, April untied the knot, being careful, she loosened the rope, but kept some around the trunk for leverage, as she took her time lowering Mikey.

Donnie was still concern about April being in the tree, watched her like a hawk, as he waited for Mikey to get closer to him to grab him.

Safely down, April let go of the rope, while Donnie help Mikey out, "See I told you I would be fine Donnie," April smiled as she stood on the branch that Mikey was tied up to, holding a branch above her as support.

Getting ready to go back down, a crunching sound came under her foot, before April could grab the branch above her again, or even the trunk of the tree, the branch snapped under her weight.

With a scream April fell, suddenly a strong pair of arms grabbed her at the last minute before she hit the ground, breathing heavily, gasping for the air that escaped her, she looked up at Raph, whom had, a not to pleased look on his face.

Putting her down Raph huffed under his breath glaring at April, "What the fuck were you thinking?! You could have gotten yourself hurt!"

He growled at her, surprised by his behaviour April looked at him sideways, trying her best not to lose her own temper, that was bubbling within, how dare he act like this!

"Well, I wouldn't have to climb that tree if you didn't tie Mikey up there! Raph the branch broke under my foot, meaning that it would have done the same when Mikey was tied to it. Do you know he could have gotten hurt!" April tried to say calmly only to fail miserably yelling at the red clad turtle.

She was now frustrated with him, a frustration that has been growing for the past week, at times he would joke around, which was ok, but he has been showing much aggression towards her as well, this was the first time he has done it in front of anyone other than Donnie.

Mikey shifted his feet as he acted like a fly caught in a web, not knowing what to do or say, Donnie even just stared, his face was blank impossible to read, as he watched Raph behaviour carefully.

"He would have been fine…" Raph started only to be interrupted by April pointing her finger at him.

"Like HELL! Raph, of all the irresponsible things to do! How could you tie your little brother up like that! Do you ever think before acting?" April growled as the argument started to heat up.

A squeak came from Mikey to indicate that he was still there, forgetting about him and Donnie, April looked over towards them, noticing the tension around them.

Taking a big breath, she should have known better, than letting her anger towards Raph for what he had done to take over her, like this.

Raph on the other hand wasn't calming down at all but getting more aggressive, "You know what fine, whatever, I fucked up! Sorry PRINCESS!" Raph threw his hands in the air storming off towards the house, kicking an old bucket that was left on the ground, across the yard into the bushes beyond.

Biting her lip, for the life of her, she didn't know what Raph's problem has been lately, still stressed out and pissed, April turned towards the direction of the pond.

Behind her, she could hear Donnie shift trying to follow her, not turning around trying to level her voice not to sound like she was mad at him, she calmly spoke to him "Donnie stay with Mikey, I want to be alone please."

With that, she continued to walk, not hearing or feeling anyone was following her.

(I thought I knew Raph… But lately he… he has been out of my reach. What is eating at him and why is he keeps taking it out on me?)

The cool water slashed her foot, relaxing April sat on the edge of the dock of the pond, playing with the water.

Her anger and stress now gone, as the beautiful surroundings captivated her, bringing her a sense of serenity, she gave herself to it, surrendering to it.

Breathing deeply she closed her eyes, clearing her mind, that was piecing together possible reasons for Raph's outbursts and demeanour.

Sure, he had a point, she could have gotten hurt, but the same time he ignored the fact Mikey would have too.

Sighing, she really didn't understand him as much she thought she did.

Then suddenly a familiar aroma came from behind her, opening her eyes, she looked over her shoulder to see him, Raph stood at the foot of the bridge, with his head down in shame.

Getting up to her fee,t she didn't say a word, waiting for him to make the move.

"Sorry…" Raph said calmly, not looking at her.

"Raph you know, I understand you being upset for me almost getting hurt… but I don't understand you not caring about Mikey… and lately you… you been angry at me, why?" April didn't beat around the bush, she wanted answers, for this was eating at her and she couldn't take it anymore.

Biting his lip, Raph looked up towards her slowly, contemplating on what he should say, "I do care about Mikey, I didn't consider the branch would even break or I wouldn't have done it…"

"Ok then what's with the yelling match, all about?"

Raph shifted his feet, he seemed nervous, hiding something, "I… No Donnie should have been the one to get Mikey down not you!"

Raph nervousness suddenly faded as anger took him yet again.

April couldn't believe that he said that, "You know very well, he would have hurt himself in the process, why would you…"

Suddenly Raph walked up to her, grabbing her waist, pulling her into him, kissing her on the lips before she could say another word.

Speechless, she froze, not sure what to think, ending his kiss, he stared into her eyes, "I know… I didn't mean he should have done it… I just… The thought of you getting hurt over my stupidity was too much to bear…"

Raph attempted to rub his thumb against her cheek, only to be denied, as April got out of his hold walking away from him.

(He kissed me… He promised not to act like that around me, what if Donnie saw that!)

Only inches away from getting off the deck, Raph grabbed her arm, suddenly April found herself pinned against the deck with Raph on top of her, confused on what just happen or how it happen she stared at him in complete disbelief of his behaviour.

"Raph what are you doing, get off of me!" April narrowed her eyes at him as he made no attempt in doing so.

"No, April I'm sorry to do this, but it's the only way to make you listen to me. The only way I know you can't just walk away from me when I need to talk to you!" Raph growled, yet his eyes were full of hurt and sadness.

Stopping her struggle she looked at him, waiting for what he wanted to say.

Biting his lip, he took a big breath, "It's not fair…"

Uncertain why he said that, she looked at him with wary eyes, "What's not fair?"

Raph placed his hand on either side of her head leaning towards her, closing his eyes, only inches from her beak, "It's not fair that he can flirt with you, he can touch you. And I can't do any of that in fear of what he would think. It's not fair, I have to watch it, see you laugh and smile at him, see him win you over and I can't even take a crack at you. I can't even look at you in the way I want to. He will win you and I don't even have a chance…"

Silence fell between them as April tried to comprehend what Raph just said, was this the reason he has been acting so aggressive? Was he jealous?

"Raph it not true, Donnie hasn't been…"

Raph growled staring at her, "Like shit he hasn't! You don't think I haven't noticed, you think I can't smell the both of you when you two get close?! It's as clear as day! Damn it, April he wasn't the only one that mated with you that night! So what he was the first one to have you! Either way you still came to me after! I know I promised not to get jealous, but I never thought it would hurt so much seeing him act the way he does to you and I can't do anything to prove my feeling for you, to give me a fair chance in winning your heart!"

Once again Raph kissed her, allowing him, April felt guilty, guilty not noticing that he was right, it was unfair, but the fear of what Donnie would do was too overwhelming.

This whole time she was hurting Raph, not realizing it, she should have put more boundaries up with Donnie, to prevent this.

Closing her eyes, she enjoyed the kiss, the way his tongue moved within her mouth rubbing against hers.

She didn't do this in pity for her actions and her guilt, but deep down she wanted this, she has been longing for one of them to do something like this with her.

After that night she couldn't help but wanting either brother showing her such affection, she tried her best to hide those feelings from them, but she guessed she didn't do such a great job, since Donnie did do things he knew he was allowed to do, to answer her needs and Raph only could watch.

Ending his kiss, he stroked her face, giving her a lick on the cheek, in return, she did the same, "I'm sorry Raph… I didn't mean to make you feel like this, to experience that jealousy… I… I don't know what to do anymore… I want you both…"

Smiling Raph chirped at her, "I know…" before Raph could say another word, he flew off of April as Donnie landed on top of him, getting in a punch, before Raph could recover kicking Donnie off of him.

Both brothers rose to their feet, Donnie growled at Raph animalistic in nature, challenging his older brother, in response Raph did the same, taking his sais out, only to throw them on the bank, he was going to make this a fair fight, considering Donnie was unarmed.

This wasn't happening! Frantic April stumbled to her feet as the brothers started to fight over her, she had to stop this.

How much did Donnie see and hear, how long was he there when Raph was admitting his feelings, did Donnie hear the part about that night, about her and Raph?

The brothers started to kick and punch, surprisingly Donnie was keeping up with Raph, who seemed not be holding back, as both growled at each other, blocking, each other attacks.

Donnie managed to get a hard blow at Raph's head, making him bleed, as Raph got some shots in too, Donnie's right arm seemed to slow down, as April notice it looked like it might be broken.

They were going to kill each other or collapse in the process.

"STOP THIS!" April screamed, trying her hardest to get through to the brothers who eyes were now clouded, she wasn't sure if they were even there anymore, she knew Donnie was still having moments where his instincts would take over reason…

But Raph, she didn't recognized him, the same way she feels when she sees Donnie lose his human side of him, sure they were turtles mutated, but they did have a scrape of human DNA that made them more humanoid than some monstrous turtles.

Not being able in taking it anymore, she risked it, they were fighting over her, she had to stop them no matter what.

Jumping in between both brothers, they froze in their attack inches away from hitting her, they looked at her breathing heavily as their eyes started to slowly unclouded, as reasoning started to come back to them.

She stood there with her hand out, as tears filled her eyes, "What he hell you two thinking! Your brothers and you hurt each other for what? ME?! It's not worth it, I'm not…"

Suddenly, April felt light headed as a pain originated around her stomach area, unsure what she was feeling, she knew they didn't hit her, yet, she felt her body start to overheat, gasping for air, April couldn't hold herself up anymore as she collapsed to the ground.

Instantly the brothers came to her aid, forgetting about their aggression between each other.

The last thing April remembered was both asking her what was wrong, feeling their hands holding her as everything was engulfed in darkness.