Forbidden Seduction
Chapter Twenty - Because you loved me
'For every dream you made come true, for all the love I found in you. I'll be forever thankful baby.'
"Hey you," I whisper, my voice hoarse, my hands shaking. Walking into the hospital room I survey my surroundings. Everything is so bright and it doesn't seem right, I mean, the last thing I feel right now is bright. The last thing Nathan feels right now is bright. The last thing Lucas feels right now is bright. The doctor says her chances are slim and that she has less than a 30 percent chance of pulling through. But, she has to. Because we need her. She's the glue holding us together. We'd break apart without her. I'd break apart without her.
I walk in and sit down on the chair next to her. It's only now that I realise how truly beautiful she really is. Even though her face is paler, her lips less plump and her eyes closed, she still looks gorgeous to me.
"So, I thought I'd come in and have a chat," I start, immediately feeling stupid, "I need some 'Baley' time."
I know she'd be laughing at me now, rolling her eyes and scoffing at the word 'Baley'. But, it calms me somehow.
"I know we're not exactly the best of friends, Hales." I start and my eyes travel over her sleeping form, "But, I admire you so much. I can't imagine my life without you. You have to wake up and see your little boy. You know, he looks more like Lucas, anything you wanna tell us there?!"
I immediately groan when I realise what I've said. I am such an idiot. Seriously, Brooke, what is wrong with you?!
"Sorry," I mumble, "He's your brother. Forgot about that part."
I know she'd be smiling at me now, telling me to stop rambling and get on with it.
"Seriously though, he's gorgeous, just like you. He has big blue eyes just like Nate, and sandy-blond hair just like you. He needs a mother, Haley. Nathan needs his wife. Lucas needs his sister. I need my friend."
My eyes are tearing up now and I have to stubbornly wipe the salty droplets away with the back of my cuff, "Nathan can't even look at him." I whisper, "Because he says that's something he has to do with you. Something you have to do together. And, I can understand that. So, wake up!"
I'm teasing her a little now, but inside, I'm not joking. I need her to wake up. She has to.
"Haley, I need your advice," I start, playing with my fingers nervously, "Lucas he- he told me he loved me. And, I don't know how I feel about that. I mean, sure I like him. A lot."
I don't know why I feel so comfortable talking to Haley about her brother, maybe it's because she's unconscious, but I know it's more than that. She's so understanding, so fair, so.. Haley.
"I think- I think I love him too." I whisper, and it feels good to finally admit it. I know she'd normally be jumping for joy right now. And that thought makes me smile.
"I just don't know whether I can truly let him in," I admit, "I mean, it's so hard for me to trust him, especially with his past."
"Anyway," I laugh slightly, "Come on Hales. You can do this. You can wake up, you're strong, so strong. I don't want to face life without you. Nathan can't live without you, and you need to meet your little boy and watch him grow into a man. And Lucas? Well, Lucas loves you, you're his life. He'll fall apart without you. And, I don't want to have to watch him break down, trust me, I promise I'll be there for him if he does but, I can't watch that. You have so many people who love you, Haley. So come back, for them." A tear rolls down my cheek.
"I love you, Haley." I smile and lean down to kiss her cheek.
She's been in a coma for over 26 hours now, and the doctor say it could take another 26 hours, another 26 days, maybe even another 26 years until she wakes up.
Or.
She might not wake up at all.
"What the hell are you doing here?" I hear Lucas' harsh voice and I walk out of the room and see who he's talking to.
Uh-oh.
Deb Scott and Dan Scott.
Deb's been crying, it's obvious too see, her eyes are bloodshot, her cheeks stained with tears. "Lucas, we have to see her," She cries, "How's she doing?"
"How do you think?" He says, his voice lined with malice. I walk up to him and wrap my arms around his back, leaning my head against his back, hoping it will comfort him somehow. It does. He looks around and sees my face, throwing me the faintest of smiles and turning back to his 'parents', his voice calmer, his breathing slower.
Dan sighs, "I know you hate us, Son. But, Haley is our daughter, and you're still our son, even after everything."
Lucas rolls his eyes in annoyance, "No, I'm not. I'm not your son. And Haley's not your daughter either. Not after everything that's happened. You left us! You abandoned us when we needed you the most. So you can't come back here in tears. Because now you have to face the possibility of losing her. Like we all do. She doesn't need you. We don't need you. All she needs is me, Nate, Brooke and her little baby."
I'm proud of him. It's taken a lot of courage to face his so-called parents. And, I admire his strength through it all. Nathan sits in the corner, his head in his hands, his whole body seems to tremble. He's breaking down already. He needs his wife. He needs his Haley.
Deb nods slightly, "I know we've hurt you, Lucas. But, Haley is our daughter and we love her. We need to see her, it may be the last time." She whispers.
I shake my head, stepping away from Lucas to face them, surprising both Lucas and Nathan, "No, don't talk like that." I tell them.
Dan raises his eyebrow, "And who are you?"
He speaks with distaint and I struggle not to roll my eyes, "A friend." I answer simply.
"Haley is going to pull through. We need her, all of us. We have to stay positive. If not for our hearts, for our sanity. I need Haley, Mr. Scott, and I'm sure you do too." Lucas holds my hand and brings it to his lips, kissing it tenderly and I know he, too, is proud of me.
"Hey little sis," Lucas smiles, walking into the bright room.
He sits in the chair next to her bed. The same chair as I sat in a few hours earlier. The same chair as Nathan sat in the day before. His eyes wandered over his sister's sleeping form and he bit his lip, his blue eyes full of sorrow.
He takes her hand gently, pursing his lips into a thin line to stop his salty tears from falling, "Haley, I'm not the most eloquent speaker."
He knows Haley would agree and the thought makes him chuckle slightly, "Haley, I need you so much. I know that Nathan and Brooke have said the same thing so many times but- but I mean it. I really do. I really need you."
He speaks slowly, wanting her to hear every word. Needing her to hear every word. He feels like he's taken her for granted all these years. He feels like he hasn't loved her enough, like he hasn't cherished her enough. He feels it everyday, he feels a love for her so strong, and he hates himself for not telling her enough.
His blue eyes are filling with translucent tears as his breathing is ragged, "Your little boy is so handsome," He smiles, "I know he's going to be quite the heart breaker. You need to wake up and be with him - be with Nathan - you need to teach him all about how to treat girls the right way. Not the way his uncle Lucas used to. Because, I know it would kill you to see him turn out like I did." His voice is remorseful and he hates himself for the way he's treated women in the past.
"I won't forgive you." He blurts out suddenly and immediately hates himself, but he carries on nonetheless, he has to get this out, "If you don't wake up, I won't forgive you, Haley. I know that's selfish and horrible, but I need you to do this for me. I need you to fight."
A sudden memory flashes in his mind and he immediately smiles, "You know, when you're better I want to take you and your son to the park when it's winter - when it's snowing. Do you remember, Haley? Do you remember how much fun we had that year? It seemed like we didn't have to be Haley and Lucas - 11 and 5 years old- we could just be our own people, even if it was just for one hour. We had no worries back then, Mom an- Dan and Deb hadn't left us and we were all a family. God, I had so much fun. You have to wake up now, so we can show your little boy, so we can enjoy that." He's rambling now, but he leans over slightly, looking into her eyes through her closed lids, "Do you remember, Haley?" He whispers, his voice full of hurt, anguish.
"Squeeze my hand if you remember," He whispers and feels disheartened when no squeeze comes. But still, he opens his mouth and starts to relive their memory. A memory from a time so long ago. A time when Lucas didn't have to be arrogant to protect his heart. A time when Haley was just a tiny girl, learning from life and growing in love...
...
"Haley!" A 11-year old Lucas shouts, kicking the white, fluffy snow around, "What's taking you so long?!"
"Mommy said I have to wrap up warm." A tiny voice calls out and Lucas can't stifle his giggles when he sees his little sister dressed up in three shirts, two pairs of pants, two pairs of gloves, a woolly hat, large, white ugg-boots and a pink scarf wrapped tightly around her neck, chin and half of her mouth, so only her eyes could be seen clearly. Lucas couldn't stop laughing but also couldn't deny that she looked absolutely adorable.
Haley's bottom lip trembles slightly, "Don't laugh at me, Luke!" The cute five year old yells, her body itching all over. But, she doesn't care. She'd dress in another six layers - as long as she gets to play in the snow with her big brother, whom she loves the most in the entire world.
Lucas stops laughing when he sees his sister's hurt eyes. He lets out one final chuckle before walking over to her and wrapping her up in his arms, "I'll make you nice and warm, Hales!" The blond boy laughs, hugging his sister tightly, rubbing her arms playfully as she giggles uncontrollably.
"Come on, Lukey!" She laughs, "Let's make a snowman!"
Lucas nods eagerly, grabbing her small hand and pulling her towards the snow fort he had made earlier.
"Lucas!" Haley smiles, "This is so cool!"
Lucas laughs, nodding, "It sure is, Haley-Baley." He smiles and they both start to roll big snow balls, Lucas making the body and Haley trying to make the head. Somehow they manage it and they're left with a crumbling snowman - but a snowman nonetheless. Haley beams and Lucas is overjoyed to see her so happy. She jumps up and down excitedly before pulling her hat off her head - revealing short, golden curls - and placing it on the snowman's white head.
"Haley! Mommy wouldn't be happy," He tells her, pointing an accusing finger, "She said you have to keep your hat on!"
Haley smirks mischievously and raises a finger to her lips, "Ssh! She doesn't have to know." She giggles and Lucas pulls her into her arms because she is just so adorable.
"Ugh!" Haley scrunches her nose playfully, "Get off me!"
Lucas smiles, standing back and admiring their snowman that was already starting to fall apart, "It's so cool!"
Haley nods before smirking, an idea coming to her young brain, "And so is this!" She giggles before scooping up a pile of snow and throwing it at her brother.
Lucas inhales sharply when he feels the cold ice on his face. He raises a hand to his face, wiping off the white snow. "Oh, you're in trouble!" He laughs and Haley squeals, trying to run away but not getting anywhere, due to the weight of her clothes.
Lucas laughs playfully, grabbing a snowball and throwing it at his little sister. It lands on Haley's forehead and she screams before falling into a fit of giggles.
Soon enough, the snow fight had begun. Haley gets the brunt of it as she isn't quick enough to dodge. Lucas, being the athletic one, isn't hit many times but he still finds it extremely fun.
The last snowball hits Haley right in the stomach and she lets out a high pitched laugh before tumbling backwards, down into the cold snow. Lucas' eyes widen as he runs over to her, worried, but finds her in a fit of hysterics. He starts laughing too, climbing on top of her and tickling her.
"L-L-Lucas!" Haley giggles, trying to catch her breath in-between laughs, "Stop!"
Lucas lets out one final chuckle before rolling beside her. They both sigh, contented.
Suddenly Haley starts to move her arms and legs, "I'm making a snow angel," The five year old tells her brother.
Lucas nods, a smile on his handsome face, "I'll make one too, then."
As they both move their arms and legs in time, a thought pops into Haley's mind.
"Will we be together forever, Luke?" She asks quietly, and Lucas turns his head to look at her, "I don't want to lose you."
Lucas lets out a small laugh, a smile on his face, "You're not going to. We will be together forever, Haley. I'm not going to let anything happen to you. I'll never leave you."
"You promise?" She raises an eyebrow and her tiny voice sounds hopeful.
Lucas laughs and nods, "I promise."
The young girl seems content with his answer as they carry on making their angels, "I love you, Lucas." She blurts out and it immediately brings a smile to Lucas' face.
"I love you too, sis."
...
Lucas is crying by the time he's finished his story. Large tears roll down his handsome features as he remembers how much fun they had. "See, Hales?" He whispers, "I promised you that I would never leave you. And now, you're leaving me! I promised that I wouldn't let anything happen to you, I'm so sorry Hales, I'm so sorry that I didn't keep my promise," He's voice trails off to a sob, the aching in his heart unbearable.
He knows deep down that it isn't his fault, but he feels it is. He should have protected her.
"I really, really love you," He sobs, holding her frail hand to his heart.
He knows that if she could talk to him she'd tell him that it wasn't his fault, that he couldn't have possibly prevented this. She'd tell him that she loved him and that she was grateful for all the love that he had shown her all these years. He knows she'd tell him that she loved him more than the world and that she would be there for all eternity. She'd tell him that they'd be together forever, just like what he had promised all those years ago. Because, that's just the person she is. She's forgiving, beautiful, loyal and kind. And, she would be a great mother.
"I want you to be here when I meet my real parents, Haley." He tells her, the tears just not stopping. "I need your support! I need your help with Brooke, I- I want some closure, Haley, I just don't know what to do!" He breaks down, placing his head in his hands.
It's silent for a few minutes as Lucas sobs into his hands, listening to the soft, steady 'beeps' of the machine that his sister needs to breathe.
"Help me, Haley." He begs, "I need to learn to let go, I don't want to lose you, I'm not ready. Show me how I can be ready, show me how I can be prepared." He cries, clutching her hand tightly, "Haley, please! Show me how to let go! Please, Haley! Show me how to let go..."
As if on cue, the 'beeps' of the machine that had been so steady two minutes ago, were now increasing. The sound was getting faster, the green line on the screen becoming straight. Lucas' eyes widened as he jumped up.
"Help!" He shouts, "Help me, please!"
Suddenly five doctors and nurses rush in, pushing Lucas out, forcing him to look through the window. He looks on in horror as his sister's face becomes even paler, the doctors and nurses staying calm but their eyes frantic. Tears roll down his cheeks rapidly as he wills - wishes for it all to be over. He just wants his sister back. Suddenly Brooke and Nathan are by his side, Nathan's eyes wide, banging on the window, breaking down. Brooke clutches his hand, burying her face in his trembling shoulder, not able to look.
"No!" Nathan cries, tears rolling down his cheeks, "Please, Haley, please."
"Lucas," Brooke whimpers, her tears soaking his shirt as he just look on, trembling.
Soon they pull the curtain and Dr. Swann walks out.
Brooke is sobbing. Nathan is shaking. Lucas is trembling. They're a mess. Without Haley, they're all a mess.
Dr. Swann lifts his head solemnly and the three know it at a glance. They know what he's about to say before he even opens his mouth.
"No." Brooke whimpers. "No!" She repeats a little louder.
Lucas pulls her into his arms as she sobs into his chest and his chin is soon soaked in his own tears. Nathan stands staring and it scares Lucas and Brooke.
"I'm sorry," Dr. Swann starts, his eyes swimming with sympathy, "We did all we could."
And then he said those two words, the words that the three had been dreading since Day One.
..."She's gone."
'You were my strength when I was weak,
You were my voice when I couldn't speak,
You were my eyes when I couldn't see,
You saw the best there was of me,
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach,
You gave me faith 'Cause you believed,
I'm everything I am,
Because you loved me.
I know you hate me.
I hate myself :(
I hope you enjoyed it anyway. It made me sad to write.