Part 20- What Sami Didn't Hear

When Will and Joy escorted the gurney bearing Sami's unconscious body through the doors of University Hospital, they were hit with a barrage of information. The Hospital hadn't fallen apart during their two-day absence, but they had certainly been missed.

Will was his cousin Claire's primary care physician. Claire, it seemed, had just regained consciousness after an accident. While the other doctors concurred that no treatment other than close observation was warranted at the moment, Will's opinion was desired.

He left his mother to the care of Joy and went to check on Claire.

Unsurprisingly, Shawn, Belle, and Philip were all in Claire's room, along with Dr. Karlin, the head of the Department of Neurosurgery.

Dr. Karlin rarely smiled, but he did when he saw Will. "Welcome back, Dr. Horton. Your mother's transport went well?"

Will nodded. "Yes."

Belle's face hardened, and she caught Will's eye. "We need to talk about that after we talk about Claire."

Will nodded again and reached automatically for Claire's chart. Shawn and Philip reluctantly stepped back to allow Will a clear view of his patient.

Claire's strawberry blonde curls were all that kept her too-pale face from blending in with the white pillow, but she managed a wan smile when Will sat beside her.

"Hi, Will."

"Hi, Claire. How are you feeling?"

The question seemed to be a difficult one. "Dizzy," she decided at last.

Will asked Claire a few more questions mainly to watch the way she responded; the answers were already on her chart.

"I agree with Dr. Karlin," he told Claire at last. "You're going to have to stay here for a few days as a precaution, but I don't think we're going to be doing much with you in the meantime."

"So they aren't going to shave my head?" asked Claire, showing more interest than she had thus far.

"If they did, your hair would grow back."

Claire didn't seem to think that that was particularly relevant, but Will didn't argue the point, not least because he suspected that he would have to save his breath for arguing with Belle.

"You don't want Mom to have the surgery?" he asked Belle without preamble when they had stepped into the empty room next door to Claire's.

Belle looked genuinely puzzled. "I think it's a great idea. It's the only hope we've had for Sami in ten years. My Mom and Dad have already made plans to fly to Salem next week—unless you think they should come sooner?"

"Then why did you say we needed to talk about it?"

"Because while you were gone, Allie remembered something that might be useful." Belle sighed, the stress of the past few days plain on her face. "You might want to sit down, Will. It's probably something like what we all guessed, but still… it seems like Sami and EJ were fighting over Allie. They were in a bathroom and Sami either saw or thought she saw EJ touch Allie… inappropriately."

"You mean the bastard was doing it all these years?"

"I don't know. For some reason I really don't think so. Sami hated EJ and she hated having him around Allie. She might have misinterpreted what she saw. But she tried to put herself between EJ and Allie. He threw her out of the way and her head hit the counter. It sounds like she was unconscious before she hit the floor."

"This is what Allie remembers? From ten years ago?" Will asked dubiously.

Belle shrugged. "I know, there's no way to know if that's what she really saw or not. It seemed like seeing Claire hit her head reminded her of when Sami hit her head, but…" Belle trailed off. Will didn't need her to complete the thought. It was possible that Allie's shock at witnessing Claire's injury had caused her mind to create a similar scenario for Sami.

"That does fit with what we've always thought about the cause of the brain damage, though," Will admitted. "And the better idea we have of what happened, the less chance there is for surprises when they do the procedure."

Either way, Belle and Will agreed, Sami should have the surgery sooner rather than later.

Since Dr. Karlin had banned Will from scrubbing in, observing, or being anywhere in the vicinity during Sami's surgery, Will came to the hospital with Lucas and the twins a few hours before the procedure was scheduled to begin.

"You can all have a chance to see her, if you want," he told them as he led them though the hospital's winding corridors. "She probably can't hear you, but there's no knowing for sure."

"You don't have to go see her, though," Lucas said, though it wasn't clear whether he was speaking to himself or the twins. "It's been such a long time, you barely remember her, and she has machines doing everything for her…"

"Yeah, no pressure to see her if you don't want to," Will agreed.

Allie chimed in that of course she wanted to see her mother.

Johnny was his usual sullen, silent self.

Lucas went in first. He wasn't going to send Johnny or Allie in not knowing what he was sending them too. Will had already seen his mother and seemed to think that it was appropriate for the twins to visit, too. But Will looked at very sick people on a daily basis. Allie and Johnny didn't.

Neither did Lucas.

It took him what seemed like a year to raise his eyes to look at Sami. He'd last seen her through a prison window. She'd been angry at him for shooting EJ, angry at him for getting caught, angry at him for asking her to take some of the blame, and angry at him for suggesting that she move on with her life without him or EJ.

He'd been furious with her because she had come to tell him that she was taking the twins to England with EJ.

("He's Johnny's father, Lucas, and he's being deported. We just have to go over there to get the Green Card situation straightened out. I can't let Johnny go without knowing his father the way Will did…")

Now, Sami was a graying, misshapen, barely-human body incapable of anger or any other emotion. Looking at her, Lucas felt almost that empty himself.

"Hi, Sami," he said as he sat beside her. "It's me, Lucas. Long time, no talk."

She didn't respond. He realized for the first time that he had somehow expected her to.

"I guess they've told you that you're having surgery today. We all think that this is the best chance you've got of coming back to us. Well, not *us* us since we haven't been an us for a long time, but your kids. Our kids. Coming back to our kids, that's what I meant.

"They're good, so I don't want to you to worry too much. Will's career here at the hospital is going great. I know Tom Horton must be so proud of him. I am, too, I puff up every time I think about him.

"And Allie, she's so sweet and so kind. Everything the world throws at her she finds a way to come out the other side even better. She's doing good in school, she has friends, she has this incredible, indomitable spirit that you don't always see at first if you don't look closely.

"Johnny, I don't know if Will told you that Johnny is my son, too, by blood. The DiMeras fixed the test—big surprise, right? I don't know why we ever believed them after he tested as mine twice. He's not having the easiest time of it. He doesn't want me to be his father. He doesn't want to be in Salem at all. The last time we were here, at the hospital, Shawn had to throw Johnny over his shoulder and carry him out.

"I felt awful about it, because Shawn has his own problems and he had to take the time to help me with my kids. But when I said that to him the other day, and thanked him for helping me, he looked at me like I was crazy.

"And no, I don't want to hear about how Shawn and everyone else has always known that.

"What he said to me was that when you and he and your other cousins were little, your parents and aunts and uncles raised you like you were a litter of puppies. That's Shawn's words, not mine. He said that sometimes the parents hardly differentiated between which kid was a son or a daughter versus a niece or nephew—they just had a triage system and whoever was there took care of the most immediate problem first. He said that he and Belle want to recreate that as much as they can with our kids and their kids.

"It was nice of him, and generous, because I'm taking a lot more from them than I'm giving. But I know that we have a lot of family here and that between us all we can bring Johnny around.

"But, damn it, Sami, it would be better for everyone if you'd wake up and help us out. So you be strong during the surgery, all right? You be smart like Will and brave like Allie and stubborn like Johnny. You be you."

Will went in next because Lucas wanted to give the twins more time to decide whether they wanted to visit Sami at all, and to prepare them for what they would see.

He barely looked at his mother as he spoke to her—not because he found looking at her difficult, but because there was nothing new to see. Sami's appearance was no surprise to him. He'd sat beside her on the long journey from the facility in London to University Hospital.

"Hi, Mom. It's me again. Dad's getting the twins ready to come see you. After that, you're going into surgical prep. Dr. Karlin won't let me observe. He doesn't want the team being distracted by having the patient's son in the room. He's probably right. He's a really great surgeon and he's pumped to do this operation. Joy's going to assist. You met Joy; she came to England with me to pick you up.

"When I was talking to Joy, I told her about the last time I saw you. A few years ago when you opened your eyes and said EJ's name. And I didn't think until I said it out loud, and until Belle told me what Allie thinks happened to you, that maybe you were trying to tell me who hurt you."

Will swallowed hard. He wasn't sure that this was what his mother needed to hear, assuming she could hear him, but it was what he needed to say. "I thought, at the time, that maybe you were asking to see him. Saying you wanted to see him and not me. Choosing him over me again. And that wasn't fair. I'm really sorry.

"I use you as an excuse sometimes. Like, I don't admit that I'd really like to be… more with Joy than what we are. And I'm sorry about that, too. I'm sorry because it isn't fair to blame you and I'm sorry because I'm pretty sure that if I asked, she'd say yes.

"I really want you to get well, Mom. I've always wanted that. I've always tried to do things so that if you saw me, you could be proud of me. If I said I was angry with you, it was only because I missed you.

"So you're going to come through the surgery and get well, okay? That's how it will be."

Will nodded and left the room. He waved at Lucas, who was still deep in conversation with Allie (Johnny was pointedly ignoring them both), to signal that he would be back soon.

Then he made a beeline for the surgeons' preparation area.

Dr. Karlin spotted him first. "I told you no, Dr. Horton," he said, with all the authority of his position.

"I need to speak with Dr. Wesley for a moment." Joy's red head shot up, and she followed Will out of the room.

"Is everything all right?" she asked.

"Yeah," said Will. "I needed to, um, ask you something." He kicked himself inwardly. He'd never dated very much; he'd been put off of it by his parents' antics and his own hellish work schedule. But he was usually smoother than this.

Joy smiled slightly. "Did you want to lecture me about being too abrupt with the patients? You haven't done that lately."

"No, I…" This wasn't going well at all. Time was short, so Will decided to let actions speak louder than words. He stepped closer to Joy and put his hands on her waist. She looked at him expectantly, so he closed his eyes and brushed his lips over hers.

When he pulled back, he asked "was that okay?" even though Joy's eyes were sparking.

"Better than okay," Joy told him. "What were you waiting on, anyway?"

When Will left the room, Johnny made no move to step forward, so Allie took her turn. She didn't want to hear her father tell her one more time that maybe she shouldn't see her mother. If she waited until Johnny had his turn, Lucas might ban her from participating altogether.

Somehow, seeing her mother like this wasn't as bad as she expected it to be. But then, she had precious few memories of what her mother was supposed to be like.

"Hi," said Allie to the sleeping woman. "We don't really know each other. I'm Allie. Alice. I just wanted to say that I hope you get well soon. And don't worry too much about the surgery. Dr. Medy says Dr. Karlin is really good. Will says the same thing."

Allie wasn't sure what else she should say. She was sure that she should say something else; Lucas and Will had both stayed in here far longer than she had.

Besides, this might be the only time she would ever have the chance to talk to her mother. No one could stop talking about how talented Dr. Karlin was, but Allie wasn't stupid. She knew that there was a chance that the operation wouldn't be successful.

"I remembered something about you a couple of days ago," she blurted out. "I remembered how you got hurt saving me. Johnny doesn't believe me, and maybe he's right and I'm wrong. But if I'm right, I wanted to say thank you for protecting me. I'm okay. I like it here. I like Dad and Will, and Claire and Ciara. And Theo! He was the one who helped me get here.

"Johnny doesn't believe me about EJ. I told you that. We've never fought like this before. It's all right, as long as we don't talk about it we can pretend it didn't happen. And I still love him the best. I know you'd like him if you'd wake up and see him. I'll let him come see you now."

Allie smiled, and left the room feeling lighter than air, although she wasn't sure why.

"I know she's going to be fine, Dad!" she announced. "It's going to work, I know it!"

Johnny hadn't decided one way or the other whether he wanted to see his "mother" at all. On the one hand, Will seemed to want him to see her, and he didn't like to do anything Will thought was a good idea. On the other hand, Lucas didn't want him to see her, and he didn't like to give Lucas any kind of satisfaction. On the third hand, he was morbidly curious. And on the fourth hand, he was genuinely terrified that he might be sick to his stomach at any second.

But when Allie skipped out, looking ridiculously happy, he darted into the room to escape her. And any time away from Lucas' prying eyes was a good thing.

His stomach lurched when he saw the corpse—no, not a corpse, but as good as—and he closed his eyes for a moment to keep from humiliating himself. He was humiliated on an almost constant basis. He didn't need to add to it.

"I'm not here to see you," he told the corpse when he was able to speak. "I don't know who you are, anyway. I remember you a little bit, I think, but there's no way of being sure. No one really remembers what they saw when they were three, no matter what Allie thinks.

"They keep telling me that you're my mother, and that Allie is my twin, and that Lucas is my real father even though you thought that Father was my father—which he is, by the way. I'm not going to turn off my feelings like a light switch just because someone kidnapped me and faked a DNA test.

"And seriously, if you really are my mother, and Allie's mother, but we have different fathers? That's sick. You must have been a real slut who told everyone Father raped you because you didn't want them to know what a slut you are. There's no way Father raped you. There's no way I'm on this planet because one person raped another person, all right? That didn't happen!"

He realized that he was raising his voice and that his fists were clenched. He took a slow, deep breath. Someone could come in here at any time, and he didn't need for whoever it was to see him out of control.

"Apologies for yelling at you," he told the corpse. "Probably you aren't even my mother. Probably it's something they made up." He stepped closer and leaned over the waxy, haggard face. "You do look like Allie might if she was old and dead or something. I can sort of believe you were her mother. And you know, I love Allie. I do! I loved her before any of these idiots ever met her. You wouldn't know it from the way she's always with Claire and Ciara and usually looking at me like she pities me. But other than Father, she's the only person I've ever loved. I should want her to be happy.

"But the thing is, I don't. I don't want her to be happy while she's making up things about Father and me. I don't want you to be happy if you're going to wake up and make stuff up about me too. I want things to go back to the way they were. I had Father and I had Allie and I was at one of the best schools in the world instead of a hick school in a hick town where everyone tells me I talk funny. Did you know that Allie actually had someone teach her to talk like she grew up in America instead of in London?

"I'm losing Allie, and Father's on the run from these people. We were fine. I don't know why they couldn't leave us alone. I don't know why Allie can't see that they're keeping us prisoner. I don't know anything.

"And I don't believe for a second that you can hear anything I'm saying.

"And I don't believe that you'd listen to me if you could."

Johnny backed away from the repulsive lump in the bed and out of the room.

He was so busy avoiding Lucas that he nearly ran into Tyler, Shawn, and Belle, who had presumably come to the hospital to spend time with Claire.

Johnny shoved Tyler hard, just because he could, and then escorted himself out of the building to save Shawn the trouble.

He wandered through the main parking lot and over a dirty snow bank into an auxiliary parking area that was mostly empty.

The January weather was really too cold to be outside for long without a coat, but Johnny didn't have anywhere else to go. So he stayed where he was.

TBC