Two days had past since james and I officially got back together, and they had been a good few days.
With Kendall staying at James' house because his own had been flooded, any time that James and I had spent together was at Logan's. Logan was still in Spain, no one had heard from him despite the fact that big time rush were meant to be filming a selection of advertisement clips for Nickelodeon tomorrow.
Carlos and Regan had returned to Los Angeles late last night. Regan was meant to be staying behind to look after her father who had taken a nasty fall, but unfortunatly things didn't go to plan for either of them in New York.
Giving up her job as porn star was meant to free Regan from the evil comments and hate that had been getting too much for her, she had let the world know via Twitter that that she was no longer in the porn game. It didn't have the desired effect though. It became apparent that it wasn't the job the rushers didn't like it was just the fact that she was dating Carlos. If anything the comments and remarks that she now recieved over the internet were worse than before now she was being more active online.
While in New York and out by herself doing grocery shopping for her father she was attacked. Her face had been scratched up pretty bad. The three girls that had cornered her let themselves be known as rushers as they scratched, punched and kicked poor Regan to the ground.
I felt sorry for her but I was learning so much at the same time from her.
I was never going to admit that I was dating James to the public. Regan was a pretty strong girl on the outside but I would crumble completely if subjected to the hate she was going through.
"It's bullying!" I said as I gave her a hug. Regan had spent the last few minutes telling me what had happened to her as James and Carlos tended to a bbq in the pena house.
She pulled a tissue from a box and dabbed at her eyes. "I just don't know what they expect me to do!..." She said sounding upset. "... How can a bunch of girls be so full of hate." She added.
"Regan, don't let them get to you! They only talk trash because they are jealous. Just carry on being you. Put that bitch face on you and give them a real reason to hate you." I said smiling.
Regan dried her eyes. She looked at the boys as they chatted by the bbq with beers in their hands.
"He is worth every name I'm called." She said looking at her beloved Carlos.
"Exactly so don't let them get the better of you." I replied.
"How are you and James doing?" She asked.
"Good... at the moment. He sometimes slips in to this odd, awkward person who acts as if he wants to tell me something but then he tries to fuck me to take his mind off of things." I said honestly.
"Do you think he is actually hiding something?" She asked quietly so the boys wouldn't hear.
I looked over to James as he stood laughing and joking with Carlos. He seemed very relaxed at the moment.
"I had a feeling he was seeing another girl... I mean why else would he break it off with me?" I said with a sigh. "I don't know what to think now though... I'm scared that if I go back home to Canada then he will split up with me again."
Regan nodded "He isn't in to drugs or anything is he? Does he drink a lot? Maybe he has little addiction that is taking over his life?" She said.
I shook my head straight away. "No... it had crossed my mind but he is so straight laced, his body is his temple, so I know he wouldn't touch any drugs and that beer is still his first one..." I said looking at James, who was driving me back to Logan's later. "... I would smell it on him if he drank too much... I just can't figure it out." I said wracking my brains as to what made James want to let me go.
Regan shrugged as she too came to no good reason for James' motives.
"Are you going to the studio tomorrow while they do the commercials?" Regan asked me as she changed the subject quickly. The boys were heading in our direction with a plate full of delicious looking barbecued food.
"I'm not sure... James do you mind?" I asked
"What's that babe?" James said as he sat down next to me.
"Can I go and watch you film the advertisements tomorrow." I repeated.
"Oh!... I don't think you are allowed." He said.
"Sure she is, Regan is tagging along, aren't you?" Carlos said liking at his girlfriend with loved up eyes.
Regan nodded, but all I could notice was the concerned look that James now wore.
"It will be boring Gabs... you would be better off staying at Logan's." James said.
I tried my hardest to smile. "I would really like to go... a tv studio and big time rush sounds like fun to me... if you don't want me there then it's cool... ." I said backing him in to an emotional corner.
James hid his new found nervousness with a smile. "Of course I don't mind. " he said grabbing a plate of food. Maybe it was just in my head. Maybe I was too suspicious of everything.
I looked at Regan though as we shared the same thought that James didn't want me there at all. I needed to know what was going on so I could just move on... help him. He had mentioned being famous to me before, did James see himself being famous as a problem... was he depressed? I couldn't get my head around how much he had changed.
The next day as I sat in the studio waiting. The shoot should of happened an hour ago but we were waiting for Logan to arrive. Kendall still had an ass face on him and Regan and Carlos were joined together by the lips.
"Did you want a drink?" James asked as he took my hand. He seemed a lot more himself today.
"Yeah that would be great... lemonade if they have one." I replied smiling.
"One lemonade coming up." James said placing a kiss on my cheek. He stood up from our row of seats and walked out the room to the vending machine that was outside.
I looked awkwardly to Regan, she was too busy with Carlos to make polite conversation, so I looked to Kendall who was sat texting on his phone.
"James said your house got flooded... did a pipe burst?" I asked trying to start a conversation with the biggest faker of them all... Kendall (I act happy but I'm really a miserable dick.) Schmidt.
Kendall finished his text before raising his head and looking at me. "No I left the bath running, the water overfilled and got in to the electrics." He said.
I nodded. "Oh I've done that before... it didn't effect the electrics though." I replied.
Kendall looked at me like I was a retard. "Great." He said sounding bored then went back to his texting.
"Do you like doing these kind of recordings?" I asked him. Really trying to make friends but he was near on un-approachable.
"I guess." Was his only reply.
"Cool... so... cover girl is my all-time favorite song." I said with a smile. It was a small lie as confetti falling was, but I did love cover girl.
Kendall looked up from his texting again and sighed, then looked at me as he decided on what to say. "Gaby... if I give you an autograph will you leave me alone." He said hurtfully.
I frowned at him. His ego was so far up his own ass hole. Before I could even try and think of a good enough reply to his evil comment Logan came in through the door, he slumped the familiar looking travel bag I saw him leave with on the floor, Logan was followed in by James who casually walked up to me and handed me my soda.
Without saying a word Logan was ready to get his job done for the day. He didn't greet anyone, he didn't speak he just stood by the producer and waited for the other three boys to get in front of the camera.
The atmosphere turned very bleak as ri realised that Logan must of come back from spain empty handed. Guilt flowed through me that I had been the one to fill him with false hope.
As the cameras rolled all four boys were filled with smiles and goofed off together, jumping in the air, and eventually having slime chucked over them for what the producer must see as a good advertisement for nickelodeon and big time rush.
I sat with Regan while the boys showered and changed.
"I guess James was right after all." Regan said.
"How do you mean?" I asked.
"It was pretty boring." She replied about the shoot.
I sighed. "It doesn't look like Viola is coming back huh?" I said to her as Logan emerged then grabbed his bag he had carried in and left back through the door.
"No... I see that as a good thing though." Regan said as she watched the door slowly close as Logan left. "I was thinking... about your James problem... do you think he has knocked a girl up?" She said.
My stomach turned at the thought he had got a girl pregnant. "No... he is shy, besides James has a kind heart he would do the honest thing." I said defending him.
"Gaby... if James had a truly honest heart then he would tell you what was wrong with him... be careful okay, you are a lovely girl but I can see you get confused with fiction and reality." She said.
I frowned. "What do you mean?" I asked.
"I heard you talking to Kendall... he isn't that sweet guy you see on the tv, he is an obnoxious man who can't see past himself... I'm just saying that maybe James isn't that simple guy you may think he is." She clarified. "Carlos doesn't wear a helmet and take me out for corn dogs for dinner. He is complex and understanding. Just make sure you know the person that James is before you fall anymore in love with him." She said then stood up.
"I know the person James is... everyone is entitled to their privacy though huh? " I said.
Regan nodded sympathetically. "Then the best thing you can do is let it go... just enjoy him for all he is... mysteries included. She said with a smile.
I returned her smile. "That sounds like good advice." I replied honestly.
James then walked in the room with Kendall. " you ready to go Gabs? He said as both boys gathered up there own belongings they had brought in with them today.
"Yeah I'm not sure if Logan wants me hanging around his house anymore." I said feeling slightly homeless.
"Well you are more than welcome to come to mine Gabs." James said softly.
Out of the corner of my eye I saw Kendall roll his eyes at the thought of me being stuck under the same roof as him.
"Gaby can stay at mine. I've got plenty of space." Regan said butting in to the conversation. I could of kissed her for the invitation. She obviously could see Kendall for what he truly was... a jack ass!
"That sounds perfect!" I said a bit too quickly.
James nodded, "shall we go get your stuff and try and cheer Logan up?" He asked.
"Did he say anything about Viola then?" I asked.
"Yeah... it's over." James said softly.
My heart broke for Logan. I nodded. "I will try and talk to him." I said to James. I was filled with such guilt that even if a few of my friendly words made Logan feel better then it would be worth it...