Author's Notes: Thanks for the review :) I'm going to answer all of the doubts and wonders you had in this chapter and take credit for the whole idea and pretend it was all mine.

No, really. You have no idea how your reviews shape my story. You make them so much better. I am forever grateful to people who take the time to tell me about what they want and what holes they spot. You make the sun come up and cause the flowers to bloom.

This is kind of random, but there's a pool in this chapter. If you're familiar with Doctor Who, you'll understand my obsession with a pool being where it's not supposed to be, and if you're not, hopefully you'll enjoy it all the same. I'm also kind of sleep deprived, which should vouch for my randomness.

Chapter Twenty

Smitten

"I still don't understand how or why your aura travelled all the way across the manor to find me," prompted Harry teasingly. "Nor can I fathom why it only seemed to happen whenever you were engaged in… romance stuff."

"Romance stuff?" Smirked Draco. "Are you listening to yourself?" He sobered up when Harry glared at him. "I'm still not completely convinced that people have auras or that you can see them, you know. You're probably making this entire thing up so you can worm your way out of talking about watching me shag someone on your ceiling and feeling so strongly towards it that you whipped out the mental connection."

Harry flushed uncontrollably, avoiding Draco's gaze, and started to rethink the whole mind link between them that ensured this honesty thing. It was true that he could set up a wall in front of the private thoughts that he didn't want Draco to know about, but Draco had let him in some dark corners of his mind and Harry felt that Draco had earned the right to know these things about him. It hadn't surprised him that it hadn't taken Draco long to wander onto the memories Harry was most embarrassed about and that he hadn't stopped tormenting Harry ever since.

"Okay, that is definitely not what happened and you know it! You saw me see your aura creep under my door in the memory that you rummaged through! And why would I knowingly create and maintain a mental bridge between us when you were doing… you know," cringed Harry.

"Romance stuff," provided Draco helpfully, the smirk ever more profound on his lips.

Harry grunted in reply. Still not accustomed to Draco's feelings being amplified in his own head, he suffered a moment of confusion of feeling joy over his own discomfort. Realising that the delight was coming from Draco, he swatted away his hand half-heartedly, trying to pull himself out of his arms. Draco grunted and pulled Harry back against him, knowing that Harry had long since caved in to all the embarrassment and discomfort Draco was going to be causing him after he'd felt how deeply depressed Draco had been when they'd stopped talking due to Harry's outbreak and his demand to be left alone, promptly followed by his incident with Narcissa.

It was true that Harry had felt plenty depressed himself during that time, but he'd been mostly occupied with thoughts and plans of winning Draco back, thus distracting himself from being completely swallowed up by a well of sadness as Draco had.

"I guess being with all those people when I actually wanted to be with you made me seek you out unconsciously with my aura," confessed Draco, feeling how understanding Harry was being towards him and appreciating it. He saw Harry's shocked look at how sincerely he'd thought about providing a serious answer and shrugged it off. "Or whatever."

"I'm still not used to us communicating on this many different levels," frowned Harry thoughtfully, struggling still to sort out his own feelings from Draco's in his head. It had been so much easier with Snape; everything had been muted and mellow, a slight headache that you forgot about unless you focused really hard on it. But what he had with Draco was loud and colourful and messy. He could keep track of what Draco was feeling at any given time while simultaneously thinking of a separate thing in his own head, feeling that Draco was following Harry's thoughts in his own head as well while being aware that Harry knew it too; it was a never ending circle, as if they were standing in between two mirrors, their reflections mirrored infinitely. It was all rather overwhelming. They both knew that they could put up a wall or distance their thoughts in order to make it less endearing, but neither had really entertained the idea. After being so far apart for so long, it felt like the first breath of fresh air to Harry. It felt so effortless and right that he couldn't quite remember how his life had been before it. There had been too much space filled with silence in his head before. Now, he felt vibrant and renewed. The amazing part was that he could tell Draco felt the exact same way without either of them having to say it out loud and doubt whether or not the other was being completely honest about their feelings. He couldn't ever fear Draco betraying him or worry about having to hide something from Draco either. It was all so clear and simple.

Now that he was so close to Draco, he had no idea why he'd worked so hard to put so much space between the two of them before. Now that he could feel exactly how Draco felt towards him, he couldn't dream of wanting anything else but to lie back in his arms and bathe in all his warmth. He wondered if it had taken the element of wonder and surprise out of their relationship, but looking into Draco's soft eyes, knew that he wouldn't trade it for anything. What he had found in Draco was honest and genuine, and he was sure that even without the mental link between them, Draco would have been happy to spend every minute of every day convincing Harry of how real his feelings for him were.

All in all, he felt uncharacteristically bright and happy and he wasn't used to it yet. It wasn't as though all his scars had healed, more like he could believe that their pain wouldn't suffocate him in their clutches and that he could move on and start over. There were times he slipped back into feeling hollow, but Draco was always there to offer some support or a warm embrace. He sensed that talking wasn't how Harry dealt with things and he was good at giving Harry the space he needed while being there for him at the same time. Harry snuggled closer to Draco, feeling peaceful and smug at having Draco back by his side wholeheartedly. He still freaked out about how effortlessly his relationship with Draco seemed to fall in place, and Draco found it immensely amusing to have Harry open up the darkest doors of his mind to him so easily and then freak out about how much of his private thoughts he was trusting Draco with. Oddly enough, Harry sort of enjoyed feeling Draco feel so content and happy, even at his expense, though he wouldn't admit it.

"It's not cool to smile this much," he muttered moodily. He broke into a smile himself after seeing Draco's angelic beaming. He simply couldn't help himself. Being gloomy around a satisfied Draco was not an option.

"Thinks he has me wrapped around his little finger," Harry mumbled under his breath, shooting Draco an accusing glare. "Prat."

Draco's grin only widened.

The other bright side of having a mental link was that he could start a conversation out of the blue and not have it sound sudden or confusing because Draco would know what made him want to discuss it, and he'd understand what he was talking about without having to try.

For Draco, who loathed having to repeat himself when not heard properly, and Harry, who had trouble expressing himself with words, it was the perfect form of communication. Add to that a guarantee to immediately cross-out any misunderstandings leading to unnecessary arguments and Harry was having the best time of his life. He still got into an argument with Draco every now and again, though, just to make sure he still could. He didn't think the need to insert themselves as the higher role in their relationship would ever fade away. It made him glad that some things never really changed. Any stability in this crazy life was welcome.

"I'm still angry at you for bailing on me when you promised to wait until I was ready," he told Draco for the hundredth time.

"And I've offered you so many different ways of making up for it," grinned Draco maliciously at how crimson Harry was turning, "but you seem to be not interested."

Harry's mind went blank after Draco threw some choice images of what he had been specifically considering of doing to Harry to show how absolutely sorry he was. Harry started making a strangled noise. He couldn't help feeling aroused, especially when Draco was looking at him with those hazy eyes, but he wasn't ready for that yet. They hadn't even kissed.

Following his thoughts, Draco smiled sinisterly, raising his eyebrows. Harry bit his lip and watched Draco's eyes travel down to it; then looked away hurriedly, trying to hide what felt like a permanent flush. He could still sense Draco eyes on him. He sent a big 'no' to Draco, painting flowers and ribbons around it in his mind, making it as big and flashy as he could to distract Draco from watching his profile.

"I'm only saying that it's not fair that you've seen me naked when I haven't seen you naked," Draco tried to reason. To reinforce his point, he threw Harry the image of himself masturbating in his bathroom, one that Harry had tried and failed to forget.

"I can't control my dreams," grumbled Harry, flushing ever redder.

"That," murmured Draco in Harry's ears. "Was not a dream. You wanted to see it."

Harry thought about a more awkward situation than being pressed against someone and talking about watching them in a wet dream as they masturbated while trying to say no to their advances but couldn't think of any situations that would be more uncomfortable than this. Feeling his distress, Draco backed off, unconsciously sending Harry soothing images and feelings to calm him down and show him that everything was okay. Harry relaxed back against Draco, thinking that he could fall asleep like this without having to worry about anything ever again.

Draco started rubbing soothing circles on Harry's arm, distractedly thinking about the big fight that now seemed so distant. Harry couldn't help but remember it too, remember how important it had seemed at the time but how pointless it was now. He cared about Draco the most. There was no way around it. Draco still hurt over the fact that Harry wasn't remembering many memories that included him, but he grudgingly accepted that that was in no way related to Harry's level of affection for him.

"I hate this," Draco murmured softly, trying not to whinge. "It's not fair to you. I can imagine waking up one day and not being able to remember the last twenty something years of my life. I would feel somehow cheated." He gazed up at the sky. "A big chunk of my life would be torn away. I would have no identity. My experiences make me who I am. How could I knowingly give all of that up? How could I give up the memory of my parents, my friends? How could I give up the memory of the first time I performed a spell, or the first time I fell in love, or the first time I flew on a broom? I don't care how horrible and painful my past is, it's still my past. I have a right to remember it. I have a right to remember what my life amounts to, same as you and everybody else. How could I ever choose to not remember who I am and what I did? How could I learn from my mistakes and grow as a person without my memories? Having to relearn everything that life has taught me in twenty years will take such a long time, Harry. I would feel so lost and incomplete. I couldn't live like that, not knowing who I was –who I am. I don't understand what brought you to call on that cloud of darkness to take you and your memories away. Hard as I try I can't imagine anything that traumatising happening to you, nothing that would cause for such an extreme measure."

"You'd still just be Draco," Harry provided softly, trying to soothe him.

"Yes, but who exactly is Draco without any memories? Do I have it in me to be a serial killer? Am I secretly in love with a band that everybody hates? Do I take milk with my coffee? Do I lose my temper easily or am I a very patient person?" He threw up his hands. "I have no way of knowing these without knowing what I was like in the past. Without my memories, I could be anything; anyone. I could throw tantrums about the smallest things or stay unaffected through anything. I wouldn't know if what I was doing was me or not. Nothing would feel right. How do you do it?"

"Does it really matter, though?" Asked Harry tentatively. "Let's say that you lost your temper easily in the past. So what? People can change. They can choose to be patient. It's not the end of the world if you try black coffee and decide it's rubbish and want to add some milk, Draco."

"I know that," said Draco exasperatedly. "I'm not explaining it right."

"You are explaining it right. I know what you're trying to say," muttered Harry after a long moment. "I know how unsure you would be of everything. I suppose it's just easier to pretend that I don't get it, for the sake of argument. I do know what drives a person to call on the darkness after all. From what I remember from my life so far, it wasn't a pleasant experience, and got worse as I grew up. I really don't want to remember all that misery. But I saw you in my earlier days when I couldn't even remember how to react to you and I know how lost you felt. I felt lost just watching you. But I thought you could move on from it. Grow to enjoy my fresh start the way that I've learned to."

Harry saw the infinite sadness reflected in the cloudy grey eyes and felt his heart clench in response. He laid a hand on Draco's.

"There's no such thing as a fresh start," Draco whispered softly. "The past always catches up with you."

"Some things never truly leave us," echoed Harry. These were the words Narcissa had told him so very long ago. "I still remember a lot from the past, more so every day. I couldn't stop the flow even if I wanted to, and I couldn't speed it up either. But a wise person once told me that it's not our memories that make us who we are. It's our heart."

He smiled at Draco ruefully. "The heart never forgets, Draco. It doesn't matter if I never end up remembering the whole of my past. What matters is that I'm here now, and so are you."

Draco made a non-committal noise and continued to play with Harry's fingers, enjoying the cool shade they'd found under an oak tree as a shelter against the bright sun. Harry could feel the resignation in him, though, and felt so much better about voicing his opinions. Maybe this talking about his feelings instead of shutting everyone out wasn't such a bad thing.

xXx

"I didn't know the manor had a swimming pool," Draco mumbled, the tone of amazement bright in his voice.

"Hey, neither did I," consoled Harry. "And I had made it my task to explore every inch of it to survive the boredom."

"Yes, but I've lived here my whole life," argued Draco irritably. "It's completely different. Why didn't anyone tell me we had an indoors swimming pool?"

"Maybe because it looks like no one's ever used it," grimaced Harry, looking at how pristine everything looked and how perfectly calm the water was. It was intimidating. He felt like splashing around in it and making some noise to break the eerie silence.

"Maybe it's not water. Maybe it's filled with acid or something." suggested Draco seriously.

Harry rolled his eyes and moved forward, dipping in his toe before Draco could stop him.

"No, I'm pretty sure it's just water," he said comically. "Though, if you don't want to risk it, I would totally understand."

"Ha ha," said Draco humourlessly, stepping forward and pushing Harry in.

Harry yelped in surprise and lost his footing, but not before reaching back and grabbing at Draco. They both fell into the water, gasping for air and accidentally gulping down a mouthful of water. Harry found it amusing that somehow Draco's hair was still dry, and made it his mission to make it wet. Draco had always seemed awfully concerned when it came to his hair.

"Argh, great, now I feel like sneezing," grumbled Draco after untangling himself from Harry.

"Don't glower at me," said Harry defensively, putting some distance between them. "You're the one who had the bright idea of pushing me in."

"And you're the one who dragged me with you!" Complained Draco, splashing water at Harry playfully.

Harry turned away from him, laughing and splashing back more forcefully, swimming further away from Draco in order to save himself.

"What do you know, I can swim," he shouted at Draco in between splashes.

"Good for you," Draco shouted back before full-on chasing him through the water. Harry, freaking out, tried to swim away faster, but the pool was only so big. Draco finally cornered him against the end of the pool, not letting Harry turn around him in any way.

"Brutal," protested Harry, trying to splash him hard enough that he wouldn't dare come any closer. The expression on Draco's face wasn't very promising.

Draco splashed back, trying to muffle Harry's shorter waves, moving forward slowly but steadily. Genuinely distressed, Harry tried to splash harder, and found his magic flowing out of him, strengthening the waves, making them larger and stronger. In a few seconds, Draco's dry hair was drenched completely, and he was backing away, holding his hand up in surrender.

Harry laughed and the waves died down, leaving the water fairly calm once more. He swam towards Draco, who was trying unsuccessfully to get his wet hair to stay out of his face, sure of his victory. When he was in reaching distance, however, Draco suddenly put both hands on his head and pushed him under the water, grinning wickedly. Harry looked at him wide-eyed before disappearing under the surface of the water, thrashing and trying to kick Draco away. Draco laughed out loud and backed away, cowering from a now equally drenched Harry.

Not caring as much about whether or not his hair looked perfect, Harry shoved it away messily and advanced towards Draco, planning his revenge. Draco, seeing Harry's plan form inside his head, was a step ahead of him and evaded him for quite some time, before Harry was finally able to trap him in a corner.

He went closer and closer to Draco, both of them grinning widely, challenging the other to start something. Harry moved so close that he cloud see the droplets hanging from Draco's hair and unintentionally raised a hand to brush his hair behind his ears. Draco, expecting Harry's revenge but not this, flinched away, and then looked at Harry in surprise, standing still to let Harry do whatever he wanted, as long as it didn't entail getting revenge.

Harry grinned maliciously, holding his hand above Draco's now semi-dry hair, and cold water poured out of his hand with such force that Draco's jaw dropped with surprise and he started shivering from the cold and retreated deeper into the warm water of the pool. Harry sprang away delightedly, happy to finally have been able to catch Draco by surprise.

Draco continued to shiver helplessly, however, not able to think of a come back to that one, and Harry was soon back by his side, hugging him apologetically and channelling his magic into warmth this time. He turned himself into a projector of warmth and Draco pasted himself against him gratefully, his teeth finally stopping their chattering.

"So good," he whispered sleepily as he let the warmth seep into him.

Harry laughed nervously, not sure that Draco would be this forgiving after he was out of his trance. Still, he kept his arms around the blond, thinking that he'd be okay with anything Draco planned to do to Harry to get even.

Besides, if Draco blabbed to Snape about Harry's improper use of wandless magic, he'd be in trouble for sure.

xXx

"What are you doing?" Draco murmured sleepily, looking down at Harry. It took him a long while to get his bearings; the last thing he remembered was standing in the pool, leaning against Harry, trying to get warm. Now, they were in his bed, wrapped in sheets, deliciously warm. He tried to call forth his annoyance towards the small brunette, but failed, as Harry was feeling too peaceful and content right now to let Draco ruin it with any negative feelings and kept sending him reassurance through their telepathic link.

"Nothing," replied Harry just as quietly, letting his hand drop against Draco's bare chest. Draco looked down on himself and saw twisting blue lines shimmer against his skin with astonishment. They were all over him, his chest, his hands, arms, and elbows. They looked like tattoos, but they were swirling and twisting as they hovered over his skin, barely making any contact. They faded away as he watched, turning into a blue smoke and then nothing. He looked at Harry's fingertip that was glowing a similar blue before it shimmered into nothingness too, and couldn't help but feel amazed. He never thought he would find something like doodling on his skin attractive, but here he was, feeling aroused.

Harry looked up into his eyes with surprise, feeling the direction his thoughts had taken. He flushed a faint pink and parted his lips, his breath hot against Draco's arm. Draco suddenly became very aware of their legs tangled together and how close Harry was to him, and more importantly, that they were in his bed.

"How did I get here, exactly?" He asked breathlessly.

"You fell asleep standing on your feet in the pool," said Harry amusedly. "So I brought you here."

"Right," replied Draco, his head swimming. Harry was so nonchalant about this that you'd think they did this sort of thing every day. "How long have I been asleep?"

"A while," replied Harry vaguely, frowning. He'd been lost in thought, not really keeping track of the time. "Does it matter?"

"No," said Draco awkwardly. He wasn't getting any direct feelings or thoughts from Harry and it made him feel disoriented. Either Harry was thinking about too many things at once for Draco to decipher, or there was something wrong with their bond. "Are you alright?"

"Hmm?" said Harry distractedly. "Yes, fine."

Draco looked at those emerald pools filled with mystery for what felt like hours, becoming hyperaware of how every time Harry breathed against his skin, his hair would stand on end and he'd get goose bumps, or how his leg was falling asleep but he didn't want to shift it to make Harry move away from him. The only thing he wanted right now was to get closer to Harry. They both were still in their boxers from swimming earlier and Draco was positive Harry had performed a cleaning spell on them because he felt squeaky clean and couldn't smell the dry chlorine scent that he should have detected after swimming. He wondered vaguely how much of his magic Harry had used up today and whether or not how he was acting now was a side effect of that.

"You're so cute when you worry," Harry muttered amusedly and leaned forward to kiss Draco on the nose. "I really am fine. Just thinking."

"About what?" asked Draco, relieved that the silence was finally broken.

"About us. If it could really work out, being with a guy and all."

"Oh," replied Draco, his heart dropping ten feet. "And?"

"And I think it will work just fine," admitted Harry shyly, coiling his hand over Draco's bare waist and blinking up at him.

Draco felt his heart flutter against his chest and he gazed at Harry adoringly.

"It's only unnerving because I'm so inexperienced," confessed Harry. "Maybe if you could tell me about some stuff beforehand, like, you know, research, then it wouldn't be so hard for me."

"Of course, Harry," replied Draco, barely concealing his excitement. "You can ask me anything. I'll teach you everything. And we don't have to do anything you don't want to, yeah?"

"Yeah," said Harry happily, beaming at Draco. "But can we start tomorrow? Because I really am tired after performing all those spells," he declared with a yawn.

Before Draco could offer any reassurance, Harry was curled against him and fast asleep, his breathing deep and comforting against Draco's chest. Draco found himself tucking his messy hair away fondly, wondering if he would ever find out what had gone through Harry's mind on this day to make him come to such a firm conclusion on his own.

He has no idea how completely abandoned and trusting he is when he's asleep, and how much he makes me want to protect him and never give him up, Harry thought sleepily, making sure to shroud that thought from Draco. He didn't want him to gloat about it later.