Colin woke slowly, curling into his warm blankets with a soft sigh. He vaguely registered that he was naked but preferred to dwell in his semi-conscious state. It wasn't until he turned around and cracked an eye open to look at his clock that he began to care. He shot up in bed and rubbed at his eyes furiously, shivering as the blanket fell from his shoulders. He scurried into the shower under lukewarm water and scrubbed himself awake. He jumped out of the shower, pat himself down with a towel and ran to his closet, forcing his damp skin into his clothes with a grimace. He slowed to a stop and spun around to look at his bed, crooked grin appearing on his face and then dropping just as quickly. Bradley hadn't stayed. He clicked his tongue and grunted, turning to other things in his haste.

Colin had time for a quick cup of coffee and a bagel, pouring out another cup when his mother shuffled into the room. He silently handed his cup to her and poured himself another, watching her as she sat down at the table and bent her head over the cup to let the steam wash over her face. Colin came around to the head of the table and tilted his head. "Are you...," he paused and quirked a brow, "are you hungover?"

She glanced up at him and resumed breathing in the scent wafting in swirls from her cup.

"Are you putting me on?" Colin laughed.

"Evee took us out, young at heart that girl," she explained, tone rough and scratchy. She put a hand to her throat and then sipped on her coffee.

Colin reached over and put a hand on her arm. "If I was't so surprised I might be jealous right now," he joked, stroking her back.

"You were never the type," she said with a soft chuckle, "for partying, I mean."

Colin took a large gulp of coffee and straightened up. "Didn't think you were either."

Hunith leaned back and groaned. "I'm not. It was one of those, 'we're not too old to do this' nights."

Colin snorted and picked up his bag, flattening the wrinkles on his blazer. "Mum, you're not old."

She laughed and waved her hand at him.

"Right, I'm going to head off," he said, pecking her quickly on the cheek before leaving. "Take some pills for that headache," he called over his shoulder.

Gwen wasn't at the bus stop when he arrived which would have worried him had the bus not just rounded the bend and come down the road. It was a silent ride. At school he was surprised to find the stone steps deserted and he stood loyally at the base, watching out for Katie or Gwen. Freya passed by him and he smiled, thinking he should at least attempt to keep up contact with her. Finally, he saw a familiar face coming toward him and in his eagerness headed to meet them.

"Mornin'," Lancelot greeted, smiling.

"Hey," Colin replied, looking over Lancelot's shoulder. "Where is everyone?"

Shrugging, Lancelot shook his head. "No idea. Coming to practice?"

"Yeah," Colin nodded. "Yeah, something just came up the last time."

Lancelot shifted his weight onto his left foot. "Yeah, that's alright. Game's tomorrow," he commented, raising his brow emphatically.

"I hear it's supposed to be interesting," Colin sighed, with just an echo of curiosity.

Lancelot chuckled. "Heard about that already, have you?" He shook his head. "Well, they always are."

Colin nodded and wondered if perhaps all the talk was grossly exaggerated, though knowing Bradley... "Oh, hey, finally!" He smiled as Katie and Gwen walked over, somehow feeling like the morning had only just begun the way it should with their presence.

Gwen slipped under Lancelot arm and smiled apologetically at Colin, apologizing for her absence. "Katie gave me a ride," she explained, shifting her attention momentarily to smile up at Lancelot, who had nuzzled her head.

"Don't even mention it," he said dismissively, looking questioningly at Katie, reaching a thumb up to wipe the smudge of mascara from the corner of her eye. "How are you?"

"I'm alright," she sighed, briefly hugging him. Before pulling away she whispered in his ear, "did Bradley call?"

He pulled away from her to search her face and shook his head. "What happened?"

"What else?" she said with annoyance, rolling her eyes. "They had a row and Bradley just stormed off and they're both too proud to really talk it out."

Colin stiffened. "Did he come back?"

"About two hours later," she scoffed, "very dramatically may I add. Eyes downcast and hood pulled over his head, I mean really," she shook her head vigorously. "Those idiots," she murmurred.

Gwen stepped forward and slipped one of her hands into Colin's palm and the other into Katie's, pressing them both tightly. "We're going to head in, okay? See you at lunch." She pecked Katie on the cheek and took Lancelot's hand before leaving.

Katie put her bag down and knelt by it, rummaging through it.

"Did you see Bradley this morning?" Colin asked.

"No, he left earlier than me, thought he might be here already," she muttered as she prodded her fingers into the inner pockets of her purse.

Colin frowned, wondering if somehow Bradley's argument with his father had something to do with his not staying over the night before. The whole night seemed to him laced with foreboding now. "What was it about?"

"Everything and nothing," she said bitterly, sighing. "Bradley's future mostly, I mean Uther's got all these plans right? And Bradley...well, it got to Igraine and from there...pair of idiots, I just can't stand it sometimes." She swished her raven pony-tail with an angry jerk of her head and then finally dug out what she was looking for. "Do you ever wonder how loving someone can be this hard when it should be easy?"

"I have to go talk to him," Colin said, stepping close enough to her to squeeze her shoulder. "Where is he?"

She smiled at him and held out her hand, dangling a set of keys from her finger. "Mrs. Bartlett used to take him out to this field not too far from the house. You'll see the path past a rounded bend, it's narrow, but no one ever drives there. Just walk on foot from the dirt path and you'll find it, easy."

Colin could feel his hand tremble as he curled his fingers around the cold metal of the keys. He nodded slowly. "Easy," he echoed shakily.

Katie hugged him. "If you wreck my car, I will not hesitate to kill you," she whispered into his ear with a lethal tone, smiling sweetly at him before jogging up the steps and into the school.

Colin laughed nervously and took a deep breath as he walked over to the parking lot. He stood by Katie's car and looked at his reflection in the window, unsure and terrified. He unlocked the luxury vehicle and got in, putting his uncertain hands on the wheel before slowly, placing the keys in the ignition and starting the car (something he hadn't done since he was sixteen). He reversed out of the parking space with his heart in his throat, turning the wheels experimentally, praying that he had enough mind to properly right the car. He drove slowly, so slowly he began to wonder if he'd even make it to Bradley before the blond decided to go to school himself, hell they might pass each other on the road. A sigh of relief escaped him when he saw that the large portion of traffic was oncoming, leaving him nearly isolated on his side of the road.

Nearing his destination, he realized he'd won only half the battle. Narrow, as Katie had so elegantly used did not cover just how pinched in he was between the birch trees on his left and a ravine on his right. He prayed to whatever forces were at work in the universe that the road he was on was one-way and that he was currently driving from the right direction. When he rounded the first bend he kept his eye fixed on the side of the road, urging the car at a snail's pace until he saw a lightly trodden path in the grass. He parked the car off on the side, shaded by the trees and left on foot, clenching and unclenching his fingers around the keys.

Getting to Bradley was harder than expected. The path was barely visible and at some point split into two. The only reason Colin chose the right one was because further down he could see scattered flowers and if Katie had meant a meadow by saying 'field' that would surely be it. He walked slowly through the grass and let his fingers graze the long strands, his head swimming the aroma of the plants, shocked at how little autumn had penetrated this pocket of land. A dozen minutes past and he stopped, biting his lip and looking over his shoulder. Firstly, he could have taken the wrong path and secondly, he might not find his way back when every tree and every flower looked the same. Ahead of him was a small hill and he took a breath and ascended it, looking out onto a meadow. Nearly in the centre of it stood a lone figure, blond hair startlingly contrasting with the deep purples and whites of the flowers. Colin thought he might feel relief upon finding Bradley but he felt an inexplicable surge of anger in his chest. He stomped down the hill and curtly called out Bradley's name.

Bradley's head whipped around in surprise and he frowned. "What are you doing?"

Colin scoffed and continued angrily trodding through the field toward Bradley, throwing his hands into the air. "You don't show up to school, Katie says you got into a row with Uther?"

"Go back to school, Colin."

Colin stopped mid-step and stared at Bradley's back incredulously. Go back? The cooly dismissive tone made Colin's jaw clench and he balled his hand into a fist. "I beg your pardon?" Not a single flutter of sympathy hit his chest amid the anger, though as he had set out that was all he felt amid the fear of driving.

Bradley's gaze was sharp as he took in Colin's frame so near him and his lips curled down. "Alright," he mock-smiled, "you stay."

Colin was rooted to the spot, staring with wide eyes as Bradley side-stepped him and began to walk away. He had hardly formed a coherent thought before his fingers dug into Bradley's arm and pulled him back. Bradley shrugged him off harshly. "Brad -"

"Just fuck off, Colin!" Bradley spat. "Jesus, it's like I can't get away from any of this shit."

Colin felt as though a bolt of lightning had hit him and his mouth hung open. Finally, he pulled himself up and firmly planted himself in front of Bradley, breathing in deeply before speaking. "I'm staying and you can do whatever you want and say whatever you want."

Bradley stared at Colin, eyes on fire, and then dropped his gaze, wiping a hand across his mouth. He breathed in shakily. "Just piss off, really," Bradley's voice was a warning.

Colin narrowed his eyes. "You think you're winning something by trying to do this alone?" Colin felt a swell of emotion catch in his throat and he reached out for Bradley's arm, the thought having put him into a position to find sympathy anew.

Bradley stepped back and slapped Colin's hand out of the way. "What the fuck do you know?"

"Don't you fucking talk like you know me," Colin said between his teeth, stepping toward Bradley. "Don't think you get to play the poor, oppressed son and think your problems are the only goddamn ones that matter or that people haven't had their own share of shit," he spat, pushing Bradley back. "And don't think you get to blame me for whatever fantasies have burst into flames for your dad about you, it's not my fault you've been too fucking scared to stand up to him for your whole life."

Bradley's eyes coloured with utter rage and his fingers curled into his palm. He raised his arm and pulled it back, knuckles white. His whole body shook with tension before he blinked and let out a wheezing breath, dropping his arm and forcing his fingers apart. He blinked rapidly and slowly sunk to his knees, bringing a trembling hand to his forehead. "Fuck," he breathed out in shock. He looked up and swallowed harshly. "Fuck, Colin."

Colin stood silently, looking down coldly, but when Bradley dropped his head Colin fell to his knees in front of him and gathered Bradley's face into his hands, lifting Bradley's chin up so that he could look into his eyes. He tentatively leaned forward and kissed him before pulling Bradley into a tight embrace. He stared ahead, chin propped up on Bradley's shoulder and for the first time since he'd walked into the meadow really noticed how beautiful it was. The flowers bloomed proudly into the chilly air and the grass was emerald green, swaying calmly in the breeze; the sky was a picturesque blue, the clouds floating by leisurely, content to revel in the pastel tint. It was as though they'd walked into a still life painting, the way an artist would have seen it, all vibrancy and peace, colour and meaning reflected in every strand of grass. Bradley's fingers dug into his skin.

"I'm glad you're here, Colin."

Colin smiled and answered by placing his cheek against Bradley's, his fingers softly circling Bradley's back. "We can't keep doing this," he murmured, breathing in the faintly sweet flowers around them. Bradley assented by humming into his shoulder. "You can't keep doing this to yourself," Colin added, lifting one of his hands into Bradley's hair.

Bradley sighed, neither disagreeing nor audibly agreeing to the comment. Instead he just held Colin tighter.

Colin felt the tension ease out of him in Bradley's embrace and reflected on his words, colouring slightly at the anger and sharpness with which he had thrown them in Bradley's face. All together they felt too harsh to him now and he wondered if he should not apologize for being so careless. But as Bradley pulled away and looked into his face, soft smile on his lips, Colin could think of nothing more than running his fingers by Bradley's ear and kissing him.

They kissed slowly and carefully, undercurrents of feeling obvious less in the touching of their lips than in the mild caress Colin bestowed on Bradley's cheek and the way Bradley's thumb brushed up and down Colin's jaw. When they pulled apart, Bradley shifted by Colin's side and sat back, looking around him before he lay on the grass. Colin followed suit and lay down next to Bradley, letting their fingers touch and play carelessly between strands of grass.

"Do you know what these flowers are called?" Bradley asked, reaching out one hand to stroke the purple splashed petals of the nearest flower.

Colin shook his head. "No."

"Igraine," Bradley said, voice soft and with an inflection that bestowed a slight melody upon the name.

Colin followed the slow yet careful path of a fluffy cloud in the sky, repeating the flower's name in his head. "Igraine," he echoed in a whisper, furrowing his brows, "isn't that?"

"When my father was in New Zealand, he found a cliff hiding this white, purple flower in its crevices, an unnamed one apparently. So he had it named and he brought it back with him. He bought this land here, it was just outside of what we already owned and he planted the entire area with the flower. It took three years for the whole field to bloom so well, just in time, really, for what he planted it for; my mother's birthday and their anniversary," Bradley said, narrating the story with reserve and near the end a sort of contrite pleasure.

"That's beautiful," Colin commented, imagining the romance of Uther bringing Arthur's mother to the crest of the hill and whispering the name of the flower in her ear as she gazed at the specks of purple and white amid the sea of green.

"That was the year I was born," Bradley continued, "and her birthday was three weeks after mine."

Colin stilled, the beauty of the meadow feeling like a weight on him now, until he breathed in its earthy, sweet aroma and let it out, allowing it to be bright in his mind again.

"You know, sometimes I feel like the side of him that could do this, died with him the day she did," Bradley murmured, not with bitterness but with genuine wonder and reflection, the way he often thought and spoke of his father; preferring to imagine that he had once been capable of softness and of overt love, if this tainted gift to Igraine meant anything.

Colin could fill in the gaps between then and now easily enough, it was almost painfully obvious how Uther had come to what he was today. He sighed and squeezed Bradley's fingers. Tentatively, he spoke: "You don't owe him an apology or your life, the way he sees fit." After a pause he carefully added: "And you don't owe it to her, you don't owe anything but to be. Be happy."

Bradley laughed. "You'd think I could do at least that."

"You can," Colin stressed, "you have been, when you're not trying to act like some caricature of yourself to please Uther."

"Colin," Bradley said in a teasing voice, propping himself up on his side to look down at the young man next to him; he grinned, "you're rather bold today."

Colin rolled his eyes, but flushed. "A little," he admitted. "I'm not trying to preach, you know? Just..."

"Help," Bradley finished, eyelashes falling thickly over his eyes. "I know," he said, "thank you."

Colin was about to say more until Bradley's eyes snapped open and his eyebrows narrowed in suspicion.

"How did you even get here?" Bradley asked, looking at Colin as though he were just becoming aware of his presence.

"Uhm," Colin sputtered weakly, "I drove?"

Bradley clicked his tongue and rolled his eyes. "Katie drove you? Is she picking you up? because I walked and would rather have a drive."

Colin slid his hand into his pocket and dug out Katie's keys, shaking them in front of Bradley's face. "I drove," he said again, popping a defiant brow. "You prat," he added with a huff, "I drove here for you."

Bradley's eyes swished back and forth as Colin shook the keys before he focused back on Colin's face, incredulous. "You're serious?" he exclaimed, sitting up. "My God, how did you manage?"

Colin let out a long laugh, punching Bradley's shoulder. "Just about," he answered, smiling, "I got here didn't I?"

Bradley pursed his lips, unconvinced, and grabbed the car keys. "Well, I'm driving us back, " he said seriously, shaking his head. "Katie let you drive," he muttered to himself in shock, "my God."

Colin let out a laugh and closed his eyes, holding Bradley's hand tightly and letting the the other one lie in the grass and the flowers, fingers reaching out as far as he could stretch them. He sighed. "Let's stay for a little while longer," he said, feeling his face warm as the sun broke out among the clouds. He felt Bradley's lips press to his cheek.

"Colin," Bradley began, looking at the side of Colin's face and the flowers just next to him, framing his dark hair and light skin, "thank you."

A light breeze brushed through the meadow, rustling the leaves in the trees and carrying with it the sweet smell of Igraine's flowers. Colin breathed it in and pressed Bradley's fingers, not bothering to answer to something which in his mind was so simple. Idiot. Always.