Notes: Thanks to Sunflower3759 and Ashes Ashes for beta-ing and Content1 for validating! They are lifesavers.

This chapter slightly overlaps the previous one, to give Bella a chance to tell us about her thoughts about their little squabble, and her afternoon with Alice. But not to worry, there's plenty of new stuff at the end as well.

Chapter 19: A Little Alone Time

BPOV

After the fight with Edward and subsequent make-up conversation in the car, I went into the apartment I shared with Alice. I was stunned to realize it didn't feel like home at all anymore. I'd been spending so much time at Edward's that my own place felt alien to me. It was a strange feeling.

There was a pile of mail on the table that Alice had left for me, and I sorted through it. Most of it was junk, but there were a few things I set aside to deal with later. I threw myself into cleaning the apartment, feeling guilty that Alice had been taking care of everything while I was gone. I was scrubbing the sink in the bathroom when a thought occurred to me. For all intents and purposes, Edward and I were living together; he'd even given me a key to his place.

Were things moving too fast? I wondered.

The moment I had the thought, I dismissed it. Everything with Edward felt right. All we needed to do was make sure that we discussed things—like having a little time apart—and we'd be fine. We were both under a lot of stress right now, and I wasn't surprised that we'd argued about something. Frankly, the fact that it had taken nearly two months before any kind of disagreement came up was pretty amazing.

Edward had been trying so hard to figure out what was going on and to take care of me; it was no wonder that he got a little panicky about not being there to help. It was sweet; he was sweet, but he just needed a little reminder that I was quite capable of keeping an eye out for myself, as well.

I needed a little time to myself. I had never spent that much time with another person, not even Alice when we lived in the dorms together. I loved Edward so much, but having an afternoon just to myself was nice. I knew that he meant well; we just had to adjust things a little. Normal growing pains in a healthy relationship were to be expected.

After the apartment was clean, I took a shower, dressed in comfy clothes, and curled up on the couch. I'd texted Alice earlier about spending some time together, and she readily agreed. With nothing to do but wait, my mind wandered. It was hard not to dwell on the fact that there wasn't a single lead on the vandalism to my car. And I couldn't deny that it seemed like I'd had a lot of bad luck lately. Maybe it was just that I was distracted and stressed out, but it all piled up together and made it that much harder to shake the worry that something else was going to happen. I didn't like feeling so on edge.

A part of me wanted to scream and throw something in frustration. I was tired of this. I wanted to believe that it had been nothing but a random act of vandalism, but that explanation didn't feel right to me. I felt like I was missing something big. Something hiding in plain sight.

I just wanted to move past it. Things were going so well for Edward and me—our minor disagreement aside—and I wanted to enjoy my time with him. Not spend every day with my stomach in knots, waiting to see if something else was going to happen.

I was just about ready to throw the remote at the wall in frustration, when Alice walked in the door. "Bella, I'm home!"

I scrambled to my feet and met her at the door. "Hey."

She frowned at me. "You look awful."

"Thanks," I said dryly.

"Well, you do. You look exhausted, stressed, and miserable."

"I feel exhausted, stressed, and miserable," I admitted.

"C'mon." She grabbed my hand and dragged me over to the couch. "Talk to me."

I let it all pour out; my frustration with the case, with work, with Edward. She listened quietly, making a few encouraging noises when warranted, but otherwise, just letting me vent. After I was done and had dried my tears, she hugged me.

"I'm sorry you have so much going on right now."

"Thanks, Alice."

"I'm afraid I can't be a lot of help with the case, but I think maybe you just need to let it go. There hasn't been any indication that anyone is specifically targeting you and I think it may very well be something random. I know it's hard, but stressing out about it isn't going to do anything but make you feel miserable."

"You're right," I agreed with a sigh.

"Okay. So you work on that. Now, next issue is work. I think if you're less stressed about everything else, you won't be quite so scatter-brained at work. Victoria seems like a great boss; it's not like she's going to fire you over a couple of minor things like that. Especially since she knows what's going on with you."

I nodded. "True."

"If you feel like you really need to, maybe you can sit down with her and tell her that you're sorry about what's been going on, and that you don't want her to think that it's because you don't care about your job."

"That's a good idea," I said, feeling a little more optimistic about things. Alice was always so good at putting things into perspective for me.

"And now about Edward."

"What? Why does that sound so ominous?"

She laughed. "Ominous? I didn't mean it to sound that way at all. I just was going to say that I think it's totally normal that you argued, and since neither of you dragged it out, I think you'll be just fine."

"Oh, good."

"Why, were you worried?"

"Not really. Just kind of anxious in general, so it's coloring the way I look at everything right now. I didn't think it was anything to worry about, but I wanted to be sure."

Alice scoffed. "He loves you, you love him; you'll be fine. Just don't let it build up quite so long if you feel like you need space. And maybe get back to having a night away from each other, if you need it. There's nothing wrong with wanting time alone, Bella."

"I know. I just hated the look on his face. He was so worried."

"I'm sure he is worried. He loves you, and he's afraid something will happen to you. It's a guy thing, Bella."

"Worrying about someone else?"

"No, wanting to protect. Not that you wouldn't do the same thing for Edward, if the situation were reversed, but guys seem to have that extra need to protect. Especially by keeping busy; they want to fix it, even if it's un-fixable."

"Hmm." I mulled over that idea for a moment.

"Do you remember when I kept getting all those weird phone calls last year?"

"Yeah," I stated, remembering the ordeal. Alice had been getting strange, hang-up calls multiple times a day, and although it eventually turned out to be someone who had a wrong number, it had really freaked her out. And Jasper had just about lost his shit. He'd been on the verge of calling the police and dragging Alice to the store to change her number before they finally figured out what was going on. "I do remember that."

"Well, just think about the way Jasper acted then. Edward's just doing the same thing, I think. He's not quite so crazy about it, but he's definitely worried. All he wants to do is protect you."

"I know. And I don't think it even would have been as big of a deal if I weren't exhausted and stressed and wanting a little time to myself. I should have said something to him before this about needing some space, though." I sighed. "I just … it's confusing, because I love spending time with him, I really do. I'm just not used to spending every moment of every day with someone. I guess I'll know what to do next time."

"Good." Alice grinned at me. "So, do you feel better?"

"I do, actually. I feel great. Thanks, I really appreciate it."

"That was just part one of the day. I am going to make you my super-death macaroni and cheese, and chocolate pudding cake. We're going to spend the afternoon and evening eating comfort food, drinking wine, and watching movies. Sound good?"

"Sounds great," I said with relief. "You're amazing, Alice."

She waved it off. "Ehh, you talked some sense into me when I was too afraid to start a relationship with Jasper. That's what friends are for."

At the end of the evening, I felt a million times better. We'd also indulged in mud masks and painted our nails, and it was exactly what I needed. It had felt good to have a few hours by myself and then to hang out with Alice.

I loved Edward desperately, but I liked having a bit of my own space, too. It was more psychological than anything else. When I was with him, I couldn't think about anything but him. With everything that had been going on in my life, I needed just a little time apart to get my head on straight again.

That night, when I put on my pajamas and crawled into bed, I realized I missed him. The day apart had been great, but I really hated the thought of going to bed alone.

He seemed genuinely happy that I'd enjoyed myself, and I was glad to hear that he agreed that some time apart was good. His questions about the case were good ones, and I really did feel better knowing he was in a unique position to help figure out who could have caused it. I hated the idea that James, Bree, or even Angela could be involved in any of this. But the more I thought about the strange little things that had been happening at the studio, the more sense it made.

Still, it felt good to be doing something about it. Coming up with ideas and letting Edward do some research wasn't much, but it was something. And I had to admit, as much I was very capable of taking care of myself, it was nice to know that there was someone else watching out for me who cared so much.

~LWP~

I found it impossible to sleep without Edward. I'd been so eager for just a few minutes alone, yet as I flipped onto my side for the umpteenth time that night, I regretted it. My bed seemed huge and empty without him. I couldn't sleep, and I missed him. With a sigh, I reached for the phone on my nightstand and texted him.

Can't sleep and I really miss you. Want to come over? B

Almost immediately, it vibrated with a response

On my way. E

I smiled at his response and went into the living room to wait for him. The apartment was dark and silent, and I dragged a blanket over my legs and rested my cheek against the cushion of the couch, watching the door. When the quiet knock sounded, I scrambled off the couch. I quickly checked the peephole and hurried to open the door. I threw myself into his arms and he eagerly curled his arms around me, squeezing me so I tight I almost couldn't breathe.

His words were muffled by my hair. "I'm glad you texted me."

"Me, too, I had a great day with Alice, but I don't like sleeping without you."

"I don't like sleeping without you, either."

We separated just far enough to walk down the hall to my bedroom, and I locked the door behind me. We helped each other out of our clothes, and when we were both bare, we tumbled onto the bed. We kissed, slowly and deeply; his body pressing mine into the mattress as I cupped his face; it was rough with stubble, and as his tongue gently pushed into my mouth to deepen the kiss, I whimpered, overwhelmed by the need I had for him.

He caressed me; his hands moving reverently over my body. His fingers delved into me, making sure I was ready for him before he softly settled himself over me again. He pushed into me, kissing me as he began to move.

Edward made sweet, slow love to me. Every action of his was a message of mute apology for our earlier argument, and as we moved together, I felt tears spill from my eyes. He brushed them away with his lips and murmured in my ear.

"I love you."

"I love you, too," I whispered back, my mouth finding his again.

I clenched around him as he pushed in deeper and then slowly retreated, repeating the excruciatingly slow rhythm until I was flushed and writhing. I groaned when he pulled out of me and slid down the bed so his face was between my thighs.

"What are you doing?" I gasped quietly.

"I'm not ready to come yet," he whispered. His mouth met my wet, aroused flesh and I clenched my eyes tightly shut, my hands digging into the tangled sheets. His movements were soft and slow at first but grew with enthusiasm until I shattered apart, muffling my cry of pleasure with my hand. I was still shaking when he smoothly slid back into me, and I groaned heavily at the way he filled me. I wrapped myself around him, needing to be as close to him as possible.

I had never felt anything like this before; the desperation to be with him was unreal. I wanted to merge with him, feel him fill every square inch of me until there was no part of me that wasn't being touched by him. The need was so great it physically hurt.

The orgasm hit me without warning, and I clenched my eyes tightly closed as I convulsed against him, his kisses swallowing the surprised gasp of pleasure I couldn't stifle. He whispered my name, over and over, as he came; his body shaking with the intensity of it.

His soft touch and secure embrace lulled me to sleep, and for the first time in too long, when I woke up I felt hopeful.

~LWP~

To my relief, the following week passed uneventfully and I was finally able to relax. The check from the insurance company arrived, and I drove home from the dealership with a gently used car. It was the first car of my own that I'd ever picked out, and although it wasn't radically different than the one it replaced, it felt good to know it was entirely my pick.

Although I missed Edward driving me to and from work, I was happy to have the freedom again. And the sportier, two-door style of my new car didn't hurt either. I tried not to let myself worry that this car might get destroyed, too.

The week was hectic for both of us. Edward spent a few more late nights at the paper than either of us would have liked, but we made it work. Friday, he called me on his lunch to invite me to go out to the bar with Mike and Eric. I readily agreed and suggested inviting a few other people, as well. I sent out a few quick texts to invite people, and we all planned to meet at seven p.m.

I turned to Bree and Angela, who were discussing something about the studio's blog. "Do you guys want to go to the bar tonight? A bunch of us are getting together and going."

Angela immediately agreed. "That would be great. I was just thinking how lame I was for not having anything to do on Friday night."

"Fantastic." I smiled at her and then turned to Bree. "What about you? It would be great if you came, Bree."

She stared at me for a long moment before shaking her head no. "I have plans."

She didn't elaborate, and I didn't push her. I hadn't really expected her to want to come anyway, but it would have been nice to see her come out of her shell a little more.

Victoria came through the studio door in a frenzy and sat us down. "You aren't going to believe it! I have the best news!"

"What is it?" Angela asked excitedly.

"Bella's photo from the wedding at the Seattle Golf Club is being featured in the upcoming edition of Seattle Bride Magazine."

I stared at her in shock, utterly stunned by her news. That was huge, mind-bogglingly huge, actually.

"Oh. My. God," Angela said.

"I don't even know what to say," I gasped. "What? How? What picture?"

"Well, I submitted the one of the bride and groom silhouetted against the Sound." Victoria explained, and then turned to Bree. "I submitted one of yours, too; the one from the Hoffman wedding with the reflection in the pond. It was a really good contender as well, but unfortunately they didn't go for it."

"I just can't believe you submitted mine, much less that it won," I said.

"You're a very talented photographer, Bella," Victoria said. "And this is excellent, excellent press for the studio. I am so proud to have you on my staff."

In the flurry of congratulations and hugs from both Victoria and Angela, I almost missed Bree slip out of the room toward the back of the studio. I was too caught up in my excitement to think twice about it.

In the past, being at the studio had always made me feel good. Since the attack on my car I dreaded going there. Not only did I flinch every time I walked through the parking lot or came out the back door, but the number of things that had gone wrong at work lately made me feel like I was constantly bracing myself for something else to happen.

Victoria had been amazing, being patient and understanding with me through all of it. And Angela had really helped me out by picking up the office work and blog posting I'd been doing before. It left me a chance to focus on just the photography. I felt guilty every time I surreptitiously watched everyone at the studio, wondering if they were somehow connected to what had happened.

Bree had been as quiet as ever, spending more time with her nose to her computer monitor, hiding behind her long, brown hair. But she willingly helped out when the corrupted files had to be re-edited, and I just couldn't think of any reason she'd have to hate me. I hated the idea that someone I knew and thought I could trust could have something to do with this.

But today, Victoria's good news finally pushed that aside, and I spent the day in a happy blur as I cropped photos and adjusted lighting levels. Victoria noticed my smile and she dropped a hand on my shoulder as she walked by. "Good to see you smiling again, Bella."

Unfortunately, my good mood didn't last. At the end of the day I went out the back door and came face to face with James. He was leaning against Victoria's red Mustang and nodded at me as I passed.

"I hear congratulations are in order again. Victoria told me about your photo being featured in the magazine."

I nodded. "Oh, yes. I was totally shocked."

"Seems like life is looking up for you, huh? Success at work, a new boyfriend …" his voice trailed off.

"Um, yeah, it's been good," I said, puzzled at what he was getting at and starting to feel a strange flicker of apprehension. I'd really hoped that my strange feeling about him after our last conversation was wrong.

"Good. Hopefully, nothing else will happen to burst your bubble. It would be a shame if someone really did have it in for you." His words stopped me in my tracks.

"What?" I turned to face him.

"Victoria told me about the damage to your car. And I heard you lost some photos. Seems like you've had some really bad luck," he said meaningfully. "Hopefully it's just that and not someone out to get you; someone who's jealous of your happiness and success."

I hardly knew how to respond, unsure if he was being sincere or giving me a veiled threat. "Right," I choked out. "Hopefully."

I left without another word, hurrying to my car and locking the doors behind me. As I pulled out onto the street and glanced in my rear-view mirror, I saw him standing there, staring after me.

Suppressing a shiver, I drove quickly to Edward's, my good mood completely gone. I was right back where I had started; terrified of what might happen next.

Notes: Yikes, so the chapter was kind of a mixed bag. Make up sex, but also a rather ominous sounding warning … What did you think of it?

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