The Uncanny Four

Chapter 21: The Tomb of Apocalypse: Part 1

By

The Uncanny R-Man

Disclaimer- All familiar characters belong to Marvel.

Quote of the day- 'Snakes. Why did it have to be snakes?'

The Baxter Building-

It was a quiet day in the home of the Fantastic Four. Galactus hadn't popped in for lunch, and the Wizard and his Frightful Four had enough sense to stay in prison. Dr Doom was still dead, and the Mole Man had stayed at home. God, Johnny Storm was bored.

Lyja, Johnny's Skrull girlfriend, and the mother of his unborn daughter, snuggled up closer to him on the couch.

'Something bothering you, babe?' Lyja asked with some concern. 'I'm sorry that I don't have a sparkling wit, but y'know… pregnant.'

'I'm sure you're full of wit, honey.' Johnny smiled as he kissed Lyja on the top of her head. 'You're so full of wit that you're the wittiest person that I've ever known. You're one great big bag of wit.'

'I'm so glad that I heard you clearly there, Bic Head.' Lyja chuckled. 'Because if I even misheard one little letter… I would have had to kick your ass.'

'And we don't want that, do we?' Johnny responded. 'I don't think I could take that kind of hurt.'

'Damn straight.' Lyja nodded. 'You're talking to the five-time Shi'Ar Pit-Fighting Champion here.'

'Oy vey…' Johnny mock-groaned. 'What've I got myself in to now…?'

Elsewhere in the Baxter Building, Reed Richards was making a conference call with Nick Fury and the mutant wannabe Messiah known as Cable.

'I must warn you that an expedition of this magnitude will be wrought with danger.' Cable warned.

'Yer just saying that because it's an expedition to yer nemesis' last resting place.' Fury rolled his good eye.

'Now Colonel, let's not come to blows over this…' Reed said as he tried to calm everything down. 'And Cable, you have my solemn oath that my family and I will not charge in to this like some team of gung-ho heroes.'

'Like yer old team, X-Force.' Fury snickered.

'Or like the Howling Commandos.' Cable retorted.

Reed just rubbed the bridge of his nose. Perhaps agreeing to this expedition wasn't such a good idea after all…

Later-

Reed had gathered Sue, Ben and Selene in his lab as he explained the reasons for the day's expedition.

'Ooh, Egypt…' Selene rubbed her hands in glee. 'That always was a favourite holiday destination of mine.'

'I am afraid that we will not have much time for sight-seeing, Selene.' Reed explained. 'Nick Fury needs us at the dig sight as soon a possible.'

'Oh well, perhaps afterwards then.' Selene shrugged.

'That's if we survive this little shindig at all.' Ben piped up. 'We always get into trouble whenever we go to Egypt. Getting' kidnapped by some futuristic pharaoh, undead Nazi zombies…'

'It's just a visit to an archaeological dig, Ben.' Sue rolled her eyes. 'Where is this dig anyway?'

'It's the tomb of En Sabah Nur…' Reed replied. 'Otherwise known as…'

'Oh Gods…' Selene groaned. 'Some people never have the common decency to stay dead…'

'This En Sabah Whoozit…' Ben scratched his head. 'He wouldn't happen to be some ancient big bad, would he? Some kind of X-Related big bad?'

'En Sabah Nur…' Sue tapped her chin in thought. 'En Sabah Nur… Where have I heard that name before?'

Then it dawned on her…

'Oh Reed, as far as crazy expeditions go, this is one fo the craziest! Apocalypse is one of the X-Men's oldest and most deadliest villains, and you want us to go explore his tomb? Have you gone insane?'

'Susan, En Sabah Nur is dead…' Reed reassured everybody calmly. 'I highly doubt that we will be in any danger. Besides, we will have a contingent of SHIELD agents with us should anything go wrong.'

'Yeah, like the guy's gonna stay dead.' Ben rolled his eyes. 'How many times has Doom died and come back?'

'I have accepted Fury's offer anyway.' Reed sighed. 'We depart in the morning.'

Ben shook his head in reluctance.

'I've got a bad feeling about this…'

The next day-

The Fantastic Four had gathered on the roof of the Baxter Building where a SHIELD hovercraft was waiting to take them to Egypt. Johnny was staying home to look after Lyja while Selene took his place on the team.

'Wow. This is it.' Selene gushed excitedly. 'My first official mission with the Fantastic Four.'

Ben hugged his wife close and kissed her on the top of her head. Ben had changed back into his rocky Thing form for the mission. There was no telling what sort of booby traps they would run in to in Apocalypse's tomb.

'You excited then, hon?' Ben smiled.

'Pretty much.' Selene nodded. 'I'm not so sure about the uniform though.'

Ben looked at the regular blue-and-white uniform that all members of the Fantastic Four wore.

'Okay, perhaps blue ain't yer best colour…' Ben admitted. 'But you'll be glad fer unstable molecules when we're knee-deep in poisonous snakes and killer scarab beetles.'

'You always were a breath of optimistic air.' Selene rolled her eyes.

Nearby, Sue was leaving instructions with Johnny.

'Now, Franklin and Val are staying with Alicia for the moment…' The Invisible Woman explained. 'But Alicia has an art show in a few days, so you will have to look after them for then.'

'Hey, no big, sis.' Johnny shrugged self-assuredly. 'What's the worst that can happen?'

'With the Fantastic Four, who knows?' Lyja answered for Sue. 'Have fun on your expedition, Sue.' The Skrull smiled as she gave her future sister-in-law a big hug. 'I'll take good care of your brother.'

'You make sure you do, Lyja.' Sue smiled back. 'And don't you go giving birth while we're away.'

Lyja held her hands up in defence.

'Hey, that kind of stuff is out of my control…' The Skrull smiled. 'if the baby wants to be born, I doubt any power on this earth will stop it.'

'I guess we'd better get this expedition over and done with before you drop then.' Sue chuckled as she gave everybody one last hug.

Johnny and Lyja watched as Sue and the others stepped into the SHIELD hovercraft.

'I feel so guilty for making you stay here with me, Johnny…' Lyja sighed apologetically. 'I just know that you're itching to go with them.'

'Go on some boring old dig with Reed?' Johnny snorted. 'I don't think so. I bet that all there is to see are some dusty old mummies and rusty old ornaments. My family comes first, no matter what.'

Lyja smiled at her partner's newfound responsibility.

'Who are you and what have you done with the real Johnny Storm?' Lyja teased.

'Oh, hardy-har-har.' Johnny rolled his eyes. 'You slay me sometimes, you know that?'

Lyja just shook her head with a kind-hearted chuckle.

'C'mon babe, let's go inside.' Lyja said as she began to lead Johnny back into the Baxter Building. 'My cravings've flared up, and I wanna see whether we've got any more peanut butter.'

'Just tell me that you're not going to spread that stuff on bacon.' Johnny shivered. 'I don't think I'd be able to take another sight like that breakfast.'

Lyja swatted at her partner with a mock frown.

'You humans have no taste.'

TBC…

Next: The Tomb of Apocalypse: Part 2

The Fantastic Four come up against hords of snakes and giant killer scarabs in Egypt. Meanwhile, back in New York, Lyja goes into labour. With the cosmic radiation from Johnny's DNA threatening to kill both mother and child, Johnny must form an auxiliary FF to travel to the Negative Zone to find a way to save her! Dr Strange, Spider-Man, She-Hulk and the Sub-Mariner guest star!