*** CURRENTLY BEING REWRITTEN ***
Hermione stood beside Ginny, arm in arm, as they faced the closed curtain. She gave the redhead's arm a squeeze as the curtain began lifting and the music started. As soon as the lights hit their eyes they strutted out onto the stage, breaking apart and dancing away from each other. As they reached the opposite ends of the stage they both turned and pointed at one another, and began singing.
'Blind me with all your lies...you're evil
I can look into your lies...you're evil
I can look into your face...you're evil
Lying all over the place...you're evil…'
They started walking over to one another, with slow, cocky strides.
'Hey ma, run into the night…
Into the night to roam…
You lie. You know…'
The girls reach each other at center stage and started circling each other with predatory gleams in their eyes. As soon as they started singing again they stood face-to-face, fists balled.
'Those looks you give me tell that you're evil…
I hope I don't see you alive you're evil…'
Hermione gave Ginny's shoulder a little shove and she stumbled before shoving Hermione back.
'You, yea you, you're so evil
You're so evil, you're evil, you're evil…'
The two turned and strutted to the front of the stage, stepping off onto tables 12 and 14. They eyed each other and dipped down low, facing the audience and shimmying as they ran their hands over their bodies.
'Hey ma, run into the night…
You're a creature of destruction;
I bet you know…
Into the night…
Into the night to fight…
Come on baby let's fight…'
They turned towards each other, then ran back to the stage, Ginny tackling Hermione as the two rolled around on stage and stopped, Ginny straddling Hermione and holding her wrists down. She looked up at the audience and Hermione twisted her head as best she could to do the same.
'Those looks you give me tell that you're evil
I hope I don't fit into your plans you're evil…'
Hermione rolled Ginny over and pinned her the same way, this time releasing her hands and the two girls began ripping at each other's clothes as they sang.
'You, yea you, you're so evil
You're so evil, you're evil, you're evil
Hey ma, run into the night
You're a creature of destruction;
I bet you know…
Into the night…
Into the night to fight…
Come on baby let's fight…'
As the music came to a stop Hermione stood and helped Ginny up, the two blowing kisses at the audience who was hooting and hollering. The looked each other over as the next song started up. Hermione sang first.
'You took your clothes off
I started to laugh
That's when I knew it was through…'
She turned from Ginny and shrugged.
'I guess I'll go I'll take a bath
there's nothing else to do.'
Ginny sang the chorus with her as they locked arms and pointed at audience members.
'You stupid asshole
know you're making me sick,
You stupid asshole
baby suck my dick'
The looked at each other as they sang the next few lines.
'1 2 I'm looking at you
and there ain't nothing I miss
3 4 I'm closing the door
'cause you no longer exist'
The touched each other's hair and faces, trading slaps before Ginny sang.
'I hear these words panning in my brain
I need a girl who puts out
but you don't and its causing me pain
I'm in the middle of doubt'
The resumed singing to various audience members
'You stupid asshole
baby I'm one too
You stupid asshole
I don't know what to do…'
The walked off the stage and up to the first person they each saw, sitting in their laps and singing.
'1 2 I'm looking at you
and there aint' nothing I miss
3 4 your just a fucking whore
'cause you no longer exist babe…'
They stood and cast disgusted faces at the person whose lap they were occupying and walked over to each other, linking arms again and getting back onto the stage. The music ended as they reached the middle and they spun and waved at the crowd.
"It's so good to see you all again! Welcome back to the Parlor of Shadows," Hermione paused as the audience clapped and shouted. "I'm sure you've all noticed this foxy little thing here with me…" she waved towards Ginny as the audience roared up once again. "This is my partner in crime Fire! I want you all to behave yourselves… Well, looking at you lot I guess that's asking too much," she finished with a wink and the audience began making loud catcalls. A hard, pounding beat kicked up and the two girls worked through the song, catfighting and loving each other much to the audience's delight.
As the song ended the lights glowed red and they moved into a softer beat, holding and stripping each other as the almost cheesy goth ballad flowed around the room, Daimion taking on vocals with Ginny and Hermione assisting him with the chorus.
'With night fading fast
Let us walk to keep the time away
My heart is so cold…
I know what is right
What to do when all have passed away
Will you still stay strong?
Steadfast when will has gone?
As here we stand hand in hand
In this funeral night
Can't I see that we both will fall
Can't you see my dry tears
On this skin so cold
Even now the Reaper comes
Though you are here I am afraid
I am afraid, my love
With night fading fast
Warmth is but a memory of youth
As our day grows old
I can't bear to part
With so many things I hold so dear
But all things must fall
How well I know the grave
We must stand strong
And face our fears until the end
'Til the time when truth is found,
When at last we can rest
As here we stand hand in hand
In this funeral night
Can't I see that we both will fall
Can't you see my dry tears
On this skin so cold
Even now the Reaper comes
Though you are here I am afraid
I am afraid, my love…'
As the song ended Hermione and Ginny stood together, now clad in only their bras, panties, boots and stockings. The audience whistled and hooted like crazy and the pair bowed and laughed, snapping each other's bra straps.
"Okay, everyone, settle down. I've got a special song for you all. Who here doesn't have a sense of humor?" Hermione asked and the audience just sat still. "Good. Then I hope you enjoy this sarcastic little ditty." Ginny sat near the edge of the stage as Hermione walked around singing and feigning concern, much to the audience's enjoyment.
'At the Ministry, all the brooms have stopped,
'Cause the big news has dropped…
All the ears are ringing;
It's got all the neighbors singing…
Dumbledore is calling the detectives…
The Aurors are being selected…
Minister is calling his advisors…
Everyone is putting out flyers!
We've got ourselves a little situation…
It's worse than a death eater invasion!
Harry Potter's got a cold and
Everybody's got to know!
We've got ourselves a little situation…
It's worse than a death eater invasion!
Harry Potter's got a cold and
He can't complain to no one!
There's a news break, for everybody watching:
Harry Potter has just started coughing!
The doctors can't explain it;
"How did he ever obtain this?"
All his friends are sending get well cards:
"You could beat it, just gotta fight hard!"
All the world is sitting home waiting;
All the priests are singing and praying…
We've got ourselves a little situation…
It's worse than a death eater invasion!
Harry Potter's got a cold and
Everybody's got to know!
We've got ourselves a little situation…
It's worse than a death eater invasion!
Harry Potter's got a cold and
He can't complain to no one!The Order has Harry surrounded;
Aurors take him to an island…
Out there, no one gets infected:
Harry lives where he can be protected!
United Nation emergency meeting…
Declares the whole world is grieving;
And peace will come if Harry just gets well…
Please come home soon!
We've got ourselves a little situation…
It's worse than a death eater invasion!
Harry Potter's got a cold and
Everybody's got to know!
We've got ourselves a little situation…
It's worse than a death eater invasion!
Harry Potter's got a cold and
He can't complain to no one!'
The audience laughed and Hermione saw Severus and Draco wiping away tears. They ended the show and the two girls sat on the end of the stage, greeting people and joking around. As the place began to empty out they went backstage with the boys in tow.
"Don't worry, Rude! I've got some business to attend to as well this weekend. The Yule Ball is next month, so we'll see each other!" Hermione reminded him as the two hugged and kissed before saying their goodbyes. Severus had to drag Draco by the collar to tear him away from Ginny, and the girls went up stairs to get ready for returning.
A/N: Ok, so not a lot happened, but I promise the Yule Ball will be SO much better! I need to go eat something. The songs from this show were:
Evil by 45 Grave, You Stupid Asshole by Angry Samoans, Anesthesia by Bad Religion, Funeral Night by Bella Morte, and a modified version of Jennifer's Cold by Buck-O-Nine.