Sorry it took so long for an update. I started school and got side tracked. Then suddenly check the site and I had several new reviews with people wanting an update. SO i got to typing right away. I hope you enjoy this chapter and I'll start working on the next one.

Chapter 20

I woke to hearing the sounds of the ocean and knew I had once again slept in the cave. I lay there enjoying the sounds of the waves crashing against the cliff when a slight cough coupled with something tugging across my rib cage made me jump and stiffen in surprise. I took several deep breaths analyzing my surroundings. I smelled the sea salt, damp moss, blood, and Jacob. His deep earthy, warm scent filled the cave. Images of last night played quickly through my mind. My father was at the pack meeting, my memory was back, and Jacob followed me here. I remember him loving me. It made me smile. I opened my eyes and looked down my body to where his long muscled arm was stretched across my rib cage. One of his thighs was lanced between mine. My head was cradled on his arm. I could see dried blood smeared on my thighs. I relaxed back into him. He shifted again still deep in sleep. His erection rubbed against my ass.

I had had my one night and that was all I could expect. He gave me what I asked for and it would be a memory I could hold onto for the rest of my life; a long lonely life. Sighing I stood up slowly so as not to wake him. I walked to the edge of the cave and with one last look at my prefect night I jumped out into the ocean.

I swam to the beach where I sat watching the sun rise yet again lost in my thoughts. He loved her and always would so long as her heart beat. Sure there was a chance Edward Cullen would come back and she would choose him over Jacob. But would Jacob choose me at that point? Would I want him to choose me second? No I wouldn't. After last night how could I ever accept being his second choice. Last night he loved me and only me. There were no other factors no grey areas no life threats to sway a heart. Our wolves were one, our hearts beat as one, and our love was one. If we could spend the rest of our lives in that cave where no outsiders could distract, no responsibilities got in the way then maybe we could be happy forever. Tears fell from my eyes as I realized there was no happy ending from either Jacob or myself. So long as Bella was alive, as a human or a vampire, our lives would be complicated and less than happily ever after. But I would make his easier. I could make his happier.

I felt my wolf swell inside me as I phased and ran for Billy's house. It was time I took my place proper place that destiny bore to me. Jacob wasn't ready but I was. If he could give me what I needed this I damn well could give him the best of me.

I skid to a stop just outside the back door. Unphasing I walked in on silent feet more out of habit then anything. I could hear Sam talking to Billy in the kitchen despite the early hour. I slipped into my bedroom to grab clothes not wanting to cause Billy more embarrassment than usual as I listened to their conversation. Sam apparently didn't hear me come in.

"No Sir, we haven't found them but I'm sure their okay."

Billy's voice held concern, "How can you not have found them? And it's not like Jacob to miss a patrol shift."

"JD…uh I mean Loralye was pretty upset when she ran out last night there's no telling how far she ran but as upset as she was there's no way she'd leave Jacob alone in an unsafe unfamiliar area. He's her imprint remember. Which is why I sent Jacob after her. Leah may be the fastest but Jacob was the only one that stood a chance at getting her attention."

" I'm sorry Sam I'm just worried about both of them. That girl is like a daughter to me now after all these months… if I wasn't trapped in this chair I'd kick that sorry piece of shits ass for abandoning her."

I walked out of my bedroom now causing them both to jump as I joined the conversation.

"Thank you Billy but I can fight my own battles."

"Loralye! Lord you added ten years to my life come here an hug an old man." Billy grinned all the worry gone from his voice.

I walked around the kitchen table knelt down and hugged the man I now truly felt was my father.

"Before you ask I'm… okay. Not good but give me time. And I'd prefer Rain over Loralye. My mother called my Rain."

" Of course. Where's Jacob? Where did ya'll go? I was worried sick." He fired question after question.

"He's fine Billy probably still sleeping." I turned to Sam. " Can you take a pair of pants to the beach by the cliffs I imagine Jacob will be needing some clothes if he wishes to make it home unseen."

"Uh yeah sure but we searched the beach several times in fact where were ya'll?" Sam seemed totally confused.

"There's a small cave behind the water fall. It's were I've been disappearing too. Jacob managed to keep up long enough to follow me there last night. You can only get to it by jumping off the cliff and swimming." I grinned at his look of shock.

"Ok you'll need to tell me more later." He turned to go to Jacob's room to get some clothes.

"Hey Sam, can you call a pack meeting in a little bit, there's something I'd like to… discuss with the pack."

"Yeah sure no problem… and ugh welcome to the family I always wanted a little sister." He grinned as he ducked into Jacob's room.

I sat there listening until I was sure he had left through the window before I turned back to Billy.

"Billy I want to thank you for all you've done for me, but I think I'm going to take Emily and Sam's offer of moving into their spare bedroom."

"What? Why? There's no need for you to leave. Did Jacob say something because…"

I cut him off, "No Billy Jacob didn't say anything. I need some space from Jacob is all."

Billy opened his mouth to say something then seemed to change his mind and a look of sadness covered his face. "Your giving up on him aren't you."

"I'd rather not think of it as giving up Billy, but he loves her. Last night Jacob and I… we loved each other. He's my imprint and I'll always love him and I'll always be there for him and be whatever he needs me to be. I realized this morning he doesn't need me as his lover, or even his friend right now. Maybe one day he'll need me to be his friend or his lover but not now. He has that gir…. He has Bella. ."

"I love Bella almost like she's a daughter but she's not good enough for him. She'll go running right back to that Cullen boy the first chance she gets."

"Probably, but I won't make him choose between his heart and his spirit. I'll be here if he decides what best for him but I won't be a door mat."

"So alpha huh? Sure that you're ready for it?"

"I was born to protect the Omega and this pact, the tribe, and Jacob. It'll make all their lives a little easier."

"It's a big responsibility."

"Yes it is and its one that I finally feel ready for. Deep down I knew the first time I heard Sam in my head that he needed me. Yesterday I learned why I never wanted to need anyone or depend on anyone. Why I was so afraid of someone needing me and depending on me. I'm not my mother and I'm damn sure not my father. When they truly needed me I came, and now despite knowing the man I love is in love with someone else… I couldn't leave."

Billy smiled at me. He put his hands on cheeks and pulled me down to kiss me on the forehead.

"It is no surprise the great mother spirit warrior chose you."

I hugged him said my good byes. I turned and trotted out the back door. I stripped my sun dress off tucked it in the leather band at my ankle I had put on and took off at a run.