Merlin stared out across the gardens as he pushed open the large wooden door leading out to them. He found himself often coming out here when the people inside the castle started their day. So many of them complained that they had no time to do anything and yet none of them realised they had all the time in the world. Someone like him had no time at all.

Arthur had told him all about his new plan. He no longer was going to save his Father using the cup and was seeking out other ways to save the King, however the attempts were pointless. The King was getting closer to death every day and it was only a matter of time before he died. They still had a way to stop that and yet the Prince wouldn't let Merlin do the one thing he could do to help.

So as the Prince carried on his days in the castle and the crew got back to their normal lives, he found himself out in the gardens where he felt most at home. Here they had trees and plants that he recognised, he could feel the sun against his face and the magic coursing through the ground. Unbeknown to Arthur but Camelot had old magic running through its foundation and Merlin's own magic buzzed from the feel of it.

As he stepped out into the sunlight he covered the distance to a nearby tree and placed his palm upon it, smiling to himself as the magic soured up to greet him. "I ask you to protect my Prince when I'm gone," he whispered like he had done every day so far. "He will be a kind King and many will seek to take advantage of this, I wish for the magic of this land to help him when his weapons cannot. To show him that magic is good when used for the right tasks."

It saddened him that Arthur would no longer trust magic when Merlin was gone. Their time together had taught the Prince that magic could be used for good but with his memories altered and his Father once again whispering his opinions in Arthur's ears, it was likely the Prince would believe magic to be evil once again.

The magic of the earth wrapped around him as his emotions spilled out into the tree and he fell to his knees as he thought of a life without Arthur. There would no longer be any reason for him to think of ways to make Arthur laugh, no more smiles that would be only for him and secret touches that were used to make him feel things that his magic never do.

He imagined walking up to Arthur and telling him his name, ending the grief the city was feeling at the loss of their King. However his own selfish needs to spend one more day with Arthur overcame this desire and Merlin would never forgive himself if the King died because he hesitated.

As he closed his eyes and let the scene unfold inside his mind, Merlin got to his feet to face the garden where he imagined his Prince stood waiting for his words. "Arthur, I don't know where to begin. We've been through so much together, and we've always pulled through. When we first met you annoyed me like crazy and your prat like behaviour made me want to punch you so hard... but then things changed." He could imagine how Arthur would try and interrupt him but with a quick look the Prince would fall quiet once more.

"Things changed when the tasks became more personal, when we had to enter that maze and I got to know you better, I got to know the real Arthur. The one that nobody else gets to see. And he wasn't so bad. In fact... Do you remember when I said I knew little about love? Well that wasn't true... well it is but... I know it is unconditional, unpredictable, unexpected, uncontrollable, unbearable to be without and can be a huge mistake for loathing. And... I think... I'm feeling a change, something... you, make me feel... I don't know."

Merlin paused as he tried to think of the right words to say. To portray to Arthur exactly how he felt in the little time they had left together.

"What I'm trying to say is, Arthur... I think I love you... my heart, it feels as if my chest can barely contain it anymore... as if it doesn't belong to me anymore, it belongs to you... and if you wanted it, I wouldn't need any great declarations of affections or demonstrations of devotion... just the knowledge that you love me too... your heart, in exchange for mine..." Merlin's hand pressed against his chest where his heart thumped beneath the skin.

"That's all I need to know to get me through this. That you love me even when you won't remember me."

"You must be the man everyone's been talking about," a stranger's voice broke through the silence that followed his words and Merlin reacted purely on instinct. His hand shot out and magic soured through the air to surround the man he didn't recognise, who was now looking at him with softened eyes. "You don't need to be afraid of me."

"Who are you?" Merlin asked.

"My name is Uther Pendragon, I believe you know my Son, Arthur." The restraints instantly vanished and Merlin took a step back as the man straightened out his clothing. Merlin cursed himself for not holding back on his magic, especially knowing the cities view on it, but he still wasn't used to the fact he was safe here. That it was only his own stupid mistakes that could get him killed. "Relax, I care little about your magic."

Merlin frowned and watched as the King slowly walked over to the tree Merlin had been at previously, his own weak hand raising to press against the bark. "Me and my Wife often used to come here. She felt peaceful in these gardens."

"I ..." for some reason words had suddenly become a problem for him.

"Many of my people have come to visit me as of late, speaking like they are saying their goodbyes, especially my daughter. She has told me of their quest to search for a cup and how instead they found a man fit to rule at my Son's side." Uther turned to face him and Merlin was surprised to see a smile on the man's face. "I have heard a great deal about you and wish to thank you personally for helping my Son through this."

"You're not going to kill me?"

"Are you a threat to Camelot?" Uther asked and he shook his head. "To my Son?" Another shake of the head given in return. "Then I see no reason to kill you. Especially since you apparently will be sacrificing yourself on my behalf which I don't fully understand."

"To save a life there must be a sacrifice," Merlin commented.

"Which is you?" Merlin nodded. "Why?"

"The sacrifice that is made can be found at the beginning of the six tasks. It is what the bearer of the cup would truly miss and that which they treasure most in this world. Once taken it cannot be returned." He recited the words he knew off heart and looked down at the ground, "The sacrifice is me."

"You are what my Son cares for most," Uther said rather then asked. Suddenly a hand came beneath his chin so his eyes were raised to meet the King's. "You would so willingly give your life so I could live?"

"Camelot needs their King."

"And that cannot be Arthur?" Uther asked.

"I will not make Arthur choose between us," Merlin replied firmly. "He set out on his journey to save his Father and that is what he shall do. I will treasure the moments we had together and hope that my sacrifice benefits the Kingdom."

There was a pause as both men looked at each other and then Uther dropped his hand, "You speak like you're not dying. When my Wife found out about her coming death, after she had discovered that Nimueh had tricked us, she began to speak in the past tense. She often said she would treasure the moments she had with me and hoped that our Son would make a fine King." Merlin remained silent and refused to confirm the Kings words. "Whatever you are planning I ask that you talk to Arthur about it. He has already lost this Mother, don't make him lose you as well."

"He won't even remember I existed your Majesty," Merlin admitted.

"The heart cannot forget what truly makes it whole," the King replied softly and moved away from him. "Goodbye Merlin."

Merlin blinked as the sunlight hit him squarely in the face and found himself suddenly alone, the King nowhere to be seen. Frowning in confusion he turned to see if Uther had walked behind him and saw only an empty garden. As he walked back towards the door he remembered Arthur telling him that Uther was bedridden and hadn't awoken in weeks, which only confused him further.

All he knew now was that he had a task to fulfill and a royal prat to see.

Arthur watched from his window as his sorcerer walked around the grounds below where he was often found during the day. For some reason Merlin was now talking to himself and walking around with his eyes closed. He had hoped that upon arrival to his chambers Merlin would be asleep in bed, recovering from the ordeal when he'd been a prisoner of Nimueh, something he refused to talk about even to Arthur. His sorcerer was troubled and that worried Arthur, Merlin should be happy now that he was safe in Camelot.

"Arthur, what are you doing?" Morgana asked as she stepped through his open door and closed it swiftly behind her with a wave of her hand. Arthur raised an eyebrow at her in question and she shrugged, "Nobodies around."

"You can't take risks like that Morgana," he replied and looked back through the window.

"It's not like Uther can do anything about it and you'll be King soon, you're hardly going to execute me when lover boy uses magic too."

"Don't call him that."

"Why not? It's what he is."

Not lately, is what Arthur wants to respond with but instead remains silent. It had been a little over a week since their return to Camelot and Merlin's awakening and nobody quite knew what was going on. There were whispers of Arthur becoming the King in a matter of days, other rumours spread that the current King would be healed soon and everything would return to normal. Which gossip Merlin believed Arthur didn't know.

"Have you talked to him about our Father?" Morgana said as she looked over his shoulder.

"Of course I have. I told him the day he woke up."

"I take it he didn't agree with our decision?"

"No. He doesn't understand how we can just let Uther pass over when we've spent so long searching for a cure. If we've worked out by now that Merlin is the sacrifice then he certainly has, I don't see why he's so eager to die for someone he doesn't know."

"It's not for Uther and you know that," Morgana said quietly and turned him so he wasn't concentrating on Merlin. "He doesn't want you to feel the loss he has. We saw how he was when he lost his Father and they'd barely known each other, I can't imagine what it'll be like for us."

"We made our choice Morgana. Our Father has lived a long and healthy life, he has ruled Camelot well and if there was a way to keep them both I would, however I can't imagine a life without Merlin. I will not imagine a life without him. Can't he see that?"

"In time he will," she told him comfortingly and brushed the hair across his forehead. "You could go and talk to him, see if you can explain it to him further?" Both looked back down towards the gardens and found them to be empty, Merlin nowhere to be seen. "That is if you can find him."

"Find who?" Merlin's voice sounded behind them and both Pendragon's turned to see him stood in the now open doorway, Morgana's magic bypassed.

"You actually," Morgana replied and gave Arthur's hand a reassuring squeeze. "I'll leave you boys to talk."

Merlin turned his head to the side to see the door close and his fingers curled as his magic locked it securely. No one was getting through that door without his say so. No interruptions. As that thought crossed his mind he tried to remain calm and turned to face Arthur who had somehow managed to move closer without Merlin noticing.

"What were you doing down in the gardens?" Arthur asked.

"Thinking about things."

"Anything you wish to share?"

Where did he begin? That he'd been visited by Arthur's dying Father? That he wanted to tell Arthur everything Nimueh had told him and tell Arthur that it was alright, he had accepted his fait? That all he needed to know was that Arthur loved him, no matter what? There were so many ways he could start, so many ways this day could end, what he wasn't sure about was how to get everything out in the way he wanted to.

"Em-"

"Don't," Merlin interrupted and lifted his gaze to meet Arthur's. "You know that's not my real name so don't bother using it."

"Emrys is your name," Arthur said firmly as if willing it to be true.

"That's not what you called me when we were in the forest as the hounds surrounded us. You said my real name. You called me M-" a hand was pressed against his lips a moment later and his back now flat against the door from the force the Prince had used.

"Don't you dare say it," Arthur whispered and Merlin witnessed anger turning to anguish in a mere second. "I risked enough saying it once. I shall not take that chance again. You are forbidden from speaking your name, do you hear me? I am not losing you. I refuse to lose you."

The Prince rested his forehead against Merlin's and closed his eyes, his hand now dropping to press against his chest where Merlin's heart beat fast with anticipation. So he hadn't misheard that day, Arthur truly knew his name. Which meant the task was all about Merlin telling his name rather than Arthur learning it. Merlin hadn't willingly offered up his name, hadn't put trust in the man ordering him to remain mute, therefore there was no cup to use.

"Your Father has to live," he replied quietly since they were so close.

"Camelot will have a King, I shall lead them and make the Kingdom stronger then it has ever been, but only with you at my side." Fingers curled to grip the material of Merlin's top and he willed himself to remain strong, not to give in to the desire to stay with Arthur. "Uther has lived a long life. He will die knowing that his Kingdom is in safe hands and I will not let him down. He will not suffer."

"You're asking me to do nothing when we both know I can save him."

"Saving him means you die," a choke came from his Prince and Merlin brought him into his arms, Arthur now burying his head into Merlin's neck and gripping the back of his shirt for dear life. "I promised you I'd never leave you, just like you did for me. Don't leave me alone. Not when I've just found you."

Merlin held Arthur tightly and both remained silent as they tried to calm themselves down, the sunlight beaming in through the window reminding him that he may not experience many more moments like these. When they weren't a lost sorcerer and a young prince. They were Merlin and Arthur. Two people who hadn't found each other in time and were destined to part when both knew they could achieve greatness.

It was then that Merlin realised Arthur was never going to let him die. He'd probably separate them if it meant Merlin never speaking his name. So as Merlin threaded his fingers through Arthur's golden locks, he closed his eyes and let his mind deviate a plan. A way to make what he wanted, happen.

"You won't lose me," Merlin lied but he knew Arthur would believe him. The Prince was hearing what he wanted so he'd believe it to be true. That was confirmed when Arthur lifted his head and met his with a huge smile on his face. "How about tonight we arrange a feast for the whole castle. Invite the crew and some people from the Kingdom, make a real night of it. Let me thank them all for welcoming me into their home."

"It's your home too you know," Arthur reminded.

A soft smile came to Merlin's lips and he pressed his own hand to Arthur's chest, "I believe home is where the heart is and if you're here, then Camelot is my home."

"You're going to love it here Emrys," the Prince claimed and opened the door to their side. "I'll organise the feast at once. We'll have music and dancing, and wait until you see the food the cooks can prepare, you'll never go hungry again. I'll have a tailor come and fit you with some robes, have to show you off now don't I?" He smiled and left the room with a bounce in his step, Merlin slowly drifting out into the hallway to watch him go.

"It'll break his heart," Morgana spoke up behind him and he turned his head to the side in question. "Please don't do this. He needs you. Can't you see how happy you make him?"

Merlin's fingers curled into fists at his side and he turned his head forward, "I have no idea what you mean. Now if you excuse me, I have a feast to prepare for." His words were left hanging as he walked away from the witch and he prayed that Arthur didn't see through his facade as easily as Morgana had.