A/N: I do not own Romeo and Juliet. My good friend William does. Though I adore the play. :]

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Chapter XXI: I want you

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"Go then; for 'tis in vain"

"Rox?"

"To seek him here that means not to be found."

"Hey—Roxas?"

"He jests at scars that never felt a wound—"

"Jeez, you sure are into this. What the hell are you watching anyway…?"

"But soft! What light through yonder window breaks?"

"Romeo and Juliet? You've got to be kidding me…"

"It is the east, and Juliet is the sun!—"

"Hey…you wanna take your eyes off the TV for a second?"

"Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon, who is already sick and pale with grief—"

I let my eyes drift slowly to my left, the voices of the TV still vivid in my ears. I actually was really into this. I'd never seen anything like it. The story really pulled me in, even if I usually had no idea what they were saying half the time. I just only realized that Axel had taken residency in the seat next to me. He was so close I could smell the cigarettes on him. So close I could feel the warmth of his arm brush across my own. So close that I felt like moving away.

"Come on—look at me. I'll turn that off if you don't."

He sounded serious so I turned my head completely towards him, again not expecting or ready to have his lips planted onto mine. He was so fast I hardly saw it coming. So fast that I didn't have time to react at all. His tongue pried my lips open and entered my mouth like before. My head felt light, my eyes shut slowly; again, I felt like this was perfect.

Until the nagging feeling crawled back into my head like an insect. It crept up on me, slowly but surely. And this time, it wasn't going to give up.

My head started to pound as Axel lifted up my shirt, the force of his own body on top of mine. Chills shot up my spine and fireworks filled my brain. I tried my best to ignore them, but it wasn't working. I was so hot. So burning. It was so painful.

I need to stop this. I can't take much more.

Weakly, I lifted one arm up and placed it on his stone hard chest. I tried with all the strength I had left to push him off me. It took a few seconds for him to even notice my movement, my head felt like it was bleeding by that point.

His lips finally left mine and I could breathe again, my head slowed its pounding. I found myself panting and gasping for breath beneath him.

"Hey…are you alright?" His voice became suddenly urgent like before.

I nodded weakly, hoping it was enough to reassure him.

I felt his fingers trail through my bangs that lay across my eyes. "Maybe I should ask you before I do something like that," he sighed.

I rolled my eyes and he laughed his magical, special laugh. "You're just so cute—I can't help myself," he admitted.

I knew I was blushing again so to cover it up, I pushed him further off me, forcing him to sit back in his spot on the couch. I wrapped my arms around my knees and brought them up onto the couch, focusing back on the TV screen.

"Ah me!" said the girl in the window. She was pretty. I recognized her from a little earlier on in the movie.

"She speaks: — O, speak again, bright angel! For thou art as glorious to this night, being o'er my head," said the main guy, Romeo. I watched as the two talked, entranced once again by the way they spoke.

Axel shifted on the couch beside me; I tried to pay him no mind. It's not that I didn't like his attention. He actually hadn't even given me much the whole day. He'd avoided me most of the time and let me do as I pleased.

And when he finally wants something…I only continue to ignore him. I even pushed him off me. If only my head and body would cooperate with me…

"Rox."

I turned quickly, making a weird and stupid sounding squeak. I blushed furiously as he smiled, his green eyes lighting up.

"You should get to bed, it's already pretty late. Might as well start getting you on a regular schedule," he said while reaching for the remote. I blinked a few times before my reflexes shot my hand forward. I snatched onto the controller right as he did, causing my fingers to squeeze around his. I froze and again my impulse was to jerk my hand back away from his touch. I was blushing again.

I'm acting like such a girl…

"Come on." Axel suddenly grabbed a hold of my retreating hand. He pulled me up from the couch and into his arms in seconds. I froze in his grasp, stunned by his movements.

He is so forward…

He walked with me towards my room. I stuck close by him, like glue. By the time we reached my room, I didn't want him to let me go.

Axel said, "Here we are."

I looked around my room again, avoiding the mirror. I'd hopefully never have to look into one again. It was a nice place—small and cozy.

But…

"I'll see you in the morning then."

He let his arms fall from my sides, I hated that.

"Don—" I paused abruptly, thinking of what I was going to say.

What was I going to say? Don't leave?

I reached my hand slowly up to his shirt and grasped a handful of it in my fist. I held onto it tightly beneath my fingertips.

I don't want him to leave me. I don't ever want to be alone.

"What's wrong?" he asked. I didn't have the courage to look into his eyes, nor did I have the courage to let him go.

I don't even know what's wrong…

"Are you hungry? I could get you some more food if you want. Though you ate almost my whole kitchen today…How about something to drink? Or are you not tired yet? You don't have to go to bed right now, just soon. You know, it's a little hard to figure this out when you don't talk to me," he laughed slightly, ruffling my hair again with his large, comforting hand.

I sighed softly. This wasn't working. I had to tell him what I wanted, if I didn't—how would he know?

I sucked in a deep breath, "D-don't…leave me," I whispered, so softly I could hardly hear myself. I felt small drops squeeze out of my eyes, they burned immensely. I was confused for a second, wondering why I was crying.

I could feel his stare on me, I felt so embarrassed. I wanted to crawl into a hole and never come out. I wanted Axel not to think of me as a stupid, girly crybaby.

I wanted…

Axel's hands were suddenly gripping my wrists. He squeezed them hard, so hard it hurt. I had no idea of what he was doing.

Is he angry with me? Maybe he's finally fed up with me…

More strange tears squeezed out of my eyes when I was suddenly jerked towards the bed with haste. It was so fast I didn't have time to think before Axel was on top of me, just as before. But this time, as I looked up into his eyes, there was so much more fire and determination in them. It…scared me. He looked like a hungry tiger above me.

I avoided his eyes and tried to loosen his tight grip on my wrists, which were lying against my sides. It wasn't working at all; his grasp was too tight and I was just too weak.

I knew what he wanted, but it didn't seem like he was going to do anything. But I knew he wanted it— that much was for sure. Maybe it was the look on my face that had him this indecisive, I probably looked so scared. On the other hand, I wasn't sure of what I wanted. Sure, kissing him was amazing. I loved it. But I didn't want that pain to come back. The headaches were too much to bear and it seemed they only occurred when Axel…

I closed my eyes tightly together, my forehead creasing.

I don't want this. I don't, I don't!

Axel sighed above me, he sounded defeated.

Did I say that out loud?

My heart thudded in my chest and a cold sweat broke out on my forehead. It was then that my head started to pound, just as my heart.

"This…is so hard," Axel suddenly spoke. I was happy to hear his voice; it calmed me.

Ask him. Ask him what's hard.

"Wha—what…?" My head throbbed, making my stuttering voice even more prominent.

Axel looked down at me again, surprise on his face instead of hunger. Though I could still see it deep in his eyes. "It's…hard…that I can't do anything to you. It's just really…difficult to force my feelings back. I know you used to like this kind of stuff, actually, you usually where the one to beg me for it. But now…I don't even know what you want. Seems like you're in pain, I can't just force you to do this—even if you used to love it. Everything's changed now…"

I blinked a few times as his hands finally let me go. Blood pulsed through my veins again—I was free. My heartbeat slowed and my head felt fine.

But, Axel…

I reached my hand out, about to grab his shirt but I recoiled it quickly.

I'm only making things hard for him; I should just crawl into a hole…

I lowered my head and pulled my legs up to my chest, holding them there I tried not to cry anymore.

Axel spoke my name quickly. "Roxas."

I didn't move, afraid that if I picked up my head he would see my tear-filled eyes.

"I love you."

At that point, I didn't even think about the tears anymore. My head lifted and I looked him in the eyes. They were truthful and sincere, greener then they'd ever been. I was lost for words.

Axel gave me a weak hearted smile then leaned forward. I cringed, afraid for a second before his lips pressed gently to my forehead. My heart seemed to stop in my chest. It was awhile until I heard it beating again, this time it was loud in my ears. Axel stayed at my forehead, kissing it still, holding onto the side of my head with one hand.

I was just so glad my head wasn't pounding. So glad to be close to him.

I'm sure at one point, that I loved him too.

—XxX—

I ended up sleeping alone in my room that night. I lay in my bed, staring at the shadows on the ceiling. It wasn't long before I had passed out, tired from the whole day. When I woke in the morning, it wasn't the phone or Axel's voice that woke me. It was another voice. One that sounded so familiar.

"Where ishe?"

"I could charge you with breaking and entering, you know."

"And I could charge you with kidnapping and assault! Now where is he!?"

"He came here on his own accord—I didn't force him to do anything."

"Yet you kept him here, without even bringing him back! That's kidnapping."

"I'm not giving him up that easily. It's not like you were the one who's been taking care of him all this time. You have nothing to say to me."

The familiar voice growled and it finally hit me whose it was.

My brother.

I heard angry footsteps outside the door. He was looking for my room. He'd find it eventually and then—

The door swung open and Cloud stood there, blonde and completely identical to me. I stared with wide eyes as he ran over to the bed.

He took my hand in his and squeezed it tightly. "Come back home with me, Roxas. We can both work together on getting your memory back. It'll work—I just know it. Nothing here will help you, so please," he begged. His bright blue eyes sparkled with his words.

My eyes traced his face, it was so pleading, no words came to my mind.

What should I tell him?

I looked back down at my hand; he was still grasping it tightly. I saw the shadow of Axel in the doorway, looming like a dark cloud.

"Please Roxas. I lost you once; I can't lose you again," Cloud admitted. I wanted to tell him not to cry and not to feel bad. I wanted everyone to be happy. Obviously, that wasn't going to work.

I'm only one kid…

"Come home. Where you belong, where your family—"

"He isn't going anywhere!"

We both turned and stared at Axel. I was shocked by his yell; usually he was such a calm person. Around me, he was anyway. A small chill crept down my back.

This isn't good.

"Just who the hell do you think you are anyway?" Cloud had by now turned his whole body away from mine. His hand still clasped mine tightly, even tighter now as he glared at the redhead with furry in his voice and eyes.

"Only the guy who's busted his ass taking care of this kid. I think you might want to ask yourself the same question. Aren't you the one who left him at the Lab? You and your parents wanted nothing to do with him after—"

"Shut up! You don't know anything!" Cloud shouted. I could do nothing but sit back and watch the two fight. It was me they were fighting over—how could I possibly end this well?

"I know enough. Roxas isn't going back with you, he's staying with me." Axel sounded so sure about it. Maybe I should have been angry that they were treating me like some kind of object, but I was just too scared to notice.

"You don't even have guardianship of him. You aren't his parent!"

"Neither are you."

"I'm family; I have the right to take him from you. He's mine just as he is my parents!"

Axel's teeth clenched in his mouth and his fists formed into lethal balls at his side. This needed to end before anything happened.

What can I do?

"You can't take him. You won't," Axel growled. It seemed as if he was trying to hold in his growing anger.

"Says you," Cloud scoffed. "I'll take him by force if I have to. I'll get my parents and they'll—"

"You can't!" Axel's voice cracked. It suddenly sounded so helpless. His eyes trailed to the floor instead of Cloud.

Cloud didn't hesitate. "I will. You'll never come near Roxas again. You've done nothing but make his life hard for him. Messing up his mind with your good looks and charm, he was only confused. He's always been confused," he spat, leering over at Axel who still wouldn't look him in the eyes.

I felt so bad for Axel suddenly. Axel was someone to me. I knew he was. I was just trying to figure that out…

"But you…you can't…" Again, he sounded so small. So insecure and terrified. So different from before.

Was me leaving him that scary for him…?

"I'll call them up right now if I have to." Cloud's anger had calmed slightly, it seemed he knew that he had won.

"Time. I-I just need some time with Roxas. Shouldn't he be the one to decide? It's his life, he's almost 17!" Axel searched for words to say, stumbling over some of them. It sounded like he was crying almost. I hated that. Hated it a lot.

"Time is something I don't have. I'm thankful for you—taking care of him when I couldn't, but this is the end. Find someone else to be your little play toy," Cloud said stiffly. He tightened his grip on my hand once again; he started to pull me up from the bed.

"He isn't…just some…"

"Come on Rox. Let's go."

"But I love him!" Axel suddenly shouted.

The room went silent. You could hear Axel's deep breathing over everyone else's. Even I was shocked to hear his confession so loud and in front of my brother no less. My heart fluttered in my chest as I stared over at him, his eyes teary.

Cloud's eyes narrowed slightly. "…It doesn't make a difference. You think he still loves you? He's forgotten everything; he doesn't even love me anymore! How could he love you?!" he yelled, so loudly it hurt my ears. I cringed, wanting to shove my hands over them so I could drown out their fighting.

He's wrong. Wrong. I still…

"I don't…care. He can hate me and I'll still chase after him. To the ends of the earth…" Axel was looking at me. It was as if he was only talking only to me. It made me happy for some reason.

Talk to them. It's the only way to end this without anymore fighting.

I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "May I…say something?" My voice sounded so small over the others, I was hoping they actually heard me.

Axel's eyes lit up and Cloud jolted around to stare at me.

Okay, I have their attention…now…say words.

My heart thudded in my chest.

Their waiting! Come on!

"I…don't want any more fighting. I just want…everyone to be happy…" It had sounded a lot less cheesy in my head, but saying it out loud actually sounded stupid. I felt so dumb, listening to the silence my words left behind. I could feel my cheeks flushing a deep red.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupi—

"He's right…This fighting is pointless. Roxas is a person too—there's no need to be fighting over him like this." I was surprised that Axel was the one to speak first. But what he said shocked me even more. His face looked pained, though he smiled as he glanced over at me; my heart leapt into my throat.

Cloud looked over at Axel then back at me, then again over at Axel. He seemed indecisive. I knew he only wanted to take me away from this place, and I didn't blame him. He was my brother after all. I must have spent endless days with him; we must have had a great bond together. He only wanted all that back, I would have too. But then there was Axel. With his sweet smile and deep, bright green eyes. His way of making my heart stop and the way he made me feel inside. He could have me blushing just by looking at him. How long had I spent with him? It must have been awhile. I had deep-rooted feelings for that man, whether I remembered them or not. They were there and most likely would always be.

—XxX—

"I wish I could make everyone happy," I sighed softly as I twirled a small loose string on the blanket in front of me.

"I know you do." Axel stood close by me; his large hand tousled my blonde hair with care. Cloud had already stridden out of the house, threatening to call the police and that he would be back. I tried to understand that he was only acting that way because he cared for me, but it was hard to picture that. He was being so forceful—so mean about everything.

He just needed to calm down…

"Roxas…"

I blinked and looked up at the redhead, his hand shifting slightly in my hair.

Once my eyes locked on his for a few seconds I felt embarrassed again, but I didn't retreat. He was just so entrancing. Axel sighed suddenly and rolled his eyes to stare at the floor; his cheeks grew a soft pink color.

Wha…?

"…What do you want to do? You can stay here…or go with your brother. I won't force you to do anything. I've realized that I can't do that to you anymore. You're old enough to make decisions by yourself. It doesn't matter how much I want you here; it's your life—I can't take that away from you."

I looked back down away from him again. This was going to be so hard. Of course I wanted to stay with Axel. But then there was Cloud and his threats. I would meet my parents. Would they forcefully take me from Axel? I wasn't related to Axel and he had no ownership of me. He couldn't really keep me here forever…could he?

"I want…you," I said truthfully. I knew I wanted him. My heart throbbed every time I thought of being away from him. If I could, I'd spend the rest of my life with only him. I would be fine with that.

Axel took my chin in his hand and turned my face towards his. I could only blush and try my best to look away.

"You want me?" he asked. He was obviously confused. I hardly portrayed my feelings well enough for him to know anyway.

I nodded, still avoiding his eyes. I could feel the heat rush to my ears, they were probably bright pink.

"Either you've realized your deep rooted love for me, or you're just terrified of Cloud. I really hope it's the first one." Axel laughed above me and I couldn't help but smile.

Both are true.

—XxX—

"Where are we going?" I asked, staring out the car window.

Axel huffed as he sat into the cab. "It's a surprise."

I pursed my lips but smiled quickly. "…Is it a good surprise?"

"Yea, it is. Now would you sit down and buckle yourself?" Axel laughed as he started up the car.

I sighed, realizing that I really wasn't sitting down fully. I was just excited I guess. I hadn't really been many places yet. As long as he wasn't going to leave me at the place he was taking me to, then I was fine.

Though, I'd never let that happen.

"Buckle so I can back out."

I rolled my eyes and snapped the seat belt in place securely around me. "What about you?" I asked, noticing that he didn't even have his on.

He smirked and backed up into the road, shifting the gears so the car moved forward. "You're in a talkative mood," he said, wrapping the strap around his body with one hand while he held the wheel with the other.

I smiled and kicked my feet back and forth under me. I guess I really had been talking a lot since our conversation in the bedroom. I just felt so comfortable around Axel suddenly; I couldn't help but talk to him more.

"Yea, I guess I am," I agreed simply.

Axel grabbed my hand in his after he'd buckled and held it tightly in-between us. I flushed and looked at him, confusion on my face.

"I'm really happy. I missed you a lot." He kept his eyes on the road but a smile was plastered on his perfect face.

I bit my lip and thought of something to say. "T-then I'll talk a lot, I promise."

That sounded dumb…

Axel's smile grew even bigger anyway. "Good. I love hearing your voice." He laced his fingers between mine gently.

A small smile formed on my face. I kind of…didn't want the moment to ever end.