Title: Expectations
Summary: Society thinks you're a freak. But me? I don't know what to think.
Warnings: boy/boy, bullying
Pairings: Leon/Cloud
Disclaimer: Characters and settings are not mine

"This needs to stop." The twelve seconds of Antebellum following those words are a Hell in which my breath and heart stop all together. Twelve seconds. I count them. Twelve seconds for you to clarify. "These hot showers aren't good for you, Leon. Normally heated showers don't cause bloody noses; you need to tone it down."

"Hn."

"C'mon, you need to get dressed. Sora's going to be here, soon."

"Hn."

"I hate it when you do that..."

I almost do it again out of habit, but stop myself and say: "Sorry," instead.

Really though, Sora wasn't going to be here for a while. He's not here in the time it takes us to eat, brush our teeth and put a decent sized dent in a pot of coffee. A knock finally sounds at ten something, accompanied by a key directly after. "You're late," I inform, glancing at the trio.

"We had to convince the Hell out of this pansy to come with us," your little brother counters, playfully pushing the tall teen into the youngest one. "Bullshitting us about how it's a 'family gathering.'"

"Language, mister."

"Whatever," Roxas rolls his eyes at you. "Like you haven't said worse."

"I'll look at us equal when you move out of Claudia's house."

He makes some unknown gesture that probably implies 'Whatever.'

"It's nice to meet you in person; Sora never stops talking about you," I say, hand extended.

"Does he, now?" he asks accepting my hand with a smirk and a sidelong glance at his boyfriend.

I never really liked that terminology. It's what they use to describe each other, but I hate to direct it at you, not when I feel like we're so much more. Even 'lover' I feel would be inadequate. But it's too soon for 'soulmate,' -at least out loud- not to mention too cliche. Yet, if someone asked me who Cloud Fenrir Strife was, that's the first think that would come to mind. The soulmate of Squall Ultrix Leonhart. But I'm not sure that's what we really are, as opposed to what I want us to be. If you could hear some of the things that go on in my head, I wonder what you'd say, how you'd feel. Would it scare you? Would it make you comfortable? Or happy, or sad? Would you be angry with how easily I brand you as my own? That really is what I want. To be with you forev-

"Hell-ooo, Space Captain? Anyone out there?"

"Stop it, Sora," I say, batting at the younger incarnate of an uncaring father.

"I asked a question!"

"Hn?"

"Why didn't you tell me you got a cat?"

"Because I received said cat yesterday."

"What's her name?"

"She doesn't have one."

"How old is she?"

"How old is she, Cloud?"

"Six weeks, I think."

"You know, Squall and I never had any cats, growing up. We had plenty of dogs, but he never liked them; one day our dog, Cerberus, chased him up a tree, and he-"

"Sora."

"Oh! Sorry."

"What? What happened?" both you and your younger brother ask.

"Cerberus was mauled by a lion and a tiger. End of story. Happy now, Sora?"

"That's not how it happened."

"So there are some forgotten details. Do they really need to know?"

The younger Leonhart shakes his head, "Sorry Leon. It was a cool story, though."

"Your mind distorted it. You were young, and didn't understand. For Cerberus, it was a tragedy. For me: a horror. And for Greiver and Shiva: their nature."

Riku is in clear discomfort, unused to larger crowds and unsettled by irritated siblings, hands clasped in his lap.

Riku was always a shy boy, at least, by the time we'd moved to Prynne. He tried to act arrogant when he was fifteen, but he didn't like having to put up a front all the time; it took too much energy, and he just didn't want to. But Riku had always opened up to me, those times we were alone. I hoped I wouldn't be the last person he opened up to; that someone would break him out of his shell, someday, and he could love that person. That he could smile in content, and not be afraid all the time.

"You know, she's awfully quiet. Isn't that a bad thing?" Riku asks, his first input to the conversation.

"It means she's content, she doesn't have anything to complain to us about," I say, picking up the flurry of black, white, and orange, who curls into my stomach, purring lightly.

"You really do know you're way around cats, for someone who never had any," Roxas notes, aloud.

"It's not entirely true I never had cats. I just never had any at home. We lived in a foster home in Balamb for a while, and I took up an apprenticeship to a feline beast tamer. That's where I met Griever and Shiva, the black lion and white tiger. After the incident with Cerberus, we moved here, and -as you could guess- haven't seen them since," I say, unaffected, soothing the only female in the house, nuzzling into me.

"Cerberus, he gave you that scar on your thigh, didn't he?..."

"...He did."

"I asked you, before, and you wouldn't tell me."

"A true warrior doesn't boast the death of an enemy. That's how I was taught, anyway." I get up, pouring more cat food, soaking it with water. "I'm going on a walk, would you set this down when it's soft?"

"Sure thing."

"Can I go with you?"

Everyone looks at Riku. "It's just...sorry, never mind..."

"No, it's fine, you can come. It'll be boring, though."

"I dunno, Leon, after your last walk..." Sora starts

"What happened on your last walk?"

"Nothing. Come on, Riku."

It's quiet for a long while, the only sound being the crunching of snow beneath the soles of our shoes. But then- "You know, we haven't talked for a long time..."

"Hn. Since I moved out, right?"

"Yeah...then you just...stopped talking to everyone."

"I called Sora, every now and then."

"But you met Cloud. Then, sometimes I thought I saw you smile. I...think I might have been jealous, you know? We couldn't reach you, but then you met him, and everything changed. But, I'm happy, too. Because I missed it when you smiled...I hated Tracy, for what happened. She stole you away from us. We were all too young to understand. We just wanted you to get better. Then you grew up and you acted so self assured...I wanted to be like you...But when you moved, it was like you were abandoning us..."

"I wasn't abandoning you, Riku. I just needed to be alone."

"I know...I know that. But still, I-"

"You're over-thinking this. I needed to leave, so I left. Not to abandon you, or Sora, or anyone else. I left for me, and for no other reason."

"Sorry, Squall..."

"You apologize too much. Apparently, you haven't learned a thing from high school."

And it's quiet, again. So quiet it's not impossible I've gone deaf. The wind stopped completely, snow fluttering silently to the ground. It's been shoveled on this road, a nice presentation of downtown Prynne. A nice, deceptive version of Prynne, home of monsters and victims and all things between. How many are there, here alone? Like Quinn? Like Tracy? Like...me?

"It's never like this."

"Like what?" I ask.

"Empty, not here. Not by your apartment. There're always children playing, or teens holding hands. Widow Bobby on her porch, knitting or something. But not today, no one's outside. Even though the weather is better than usual. It's like they're...scared of something."

I clench my teeth, loosen them. "What would they be afraid of, Riku?"

"I...don't know..."

But he does know. He knows because he sees him as well as I do. He knows because his vision is near perfect, and how can you miss such ominous black against such pure white. He knows because if he didn't recognize him at first, the tremor of my hand is more than enough to give it away. He knows because nothing else is so purely made of horror. Quinn Boudaikian had been released. Quinn Boudaikian is on the other side of the street.

"Hurry, Axel's place is just down the road."

"Did he see you?"

"No."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes. He would be here, if he had."

"Please wait, I'm almost done!" a voice calls from the next room. It sounds like Axel, but part of me knows it isn't. The voice is too professional.

"I'm on it," another voice calls, and that must be him. "Woah, back so soon? I know, you can't resist, right?"

"This is Axel?" Riku asks.

"Yeah, this is Axel."

"So tell me: back for another hole or what? 'Cause no one needs that blindfold more than you."

I ignore him, something I've gotten pretty alright at. "Boudaikian is back."

His grin falters, then vanishes completely. He replaces it with a grim frown. "What do you mean 'Boudaikian is back?'"

"I mean exactly what I said. Quinn Boudaikian has been released from James County Juvenile Hall."

The red head breathes a curse, emerald eyes glowing with a kind of seriousness I didn't know he was capable of. No, not just seriousness; hatred. For what, I wasn't sure, but I know that look, perhaps better than anyone. It was the watered down version of the look Tracy gave me the day she died. That's the look a person gets when they harbor enough hate that they want the other dead.

"'He's a minor, so they couldn't keep him.' 'It was a first offence,' so they went easy. Or maybe he had a good lawyer, or lied. None of those things, those pathetic excuse for reasons, are enough to justify his being let free. None of those could vindicate him in a thousand lifetimes."

"Axel-"

"What's going on?" the like-haired man asks, emerging from behind a curtain with a blonde girl, who I recognize graduated our school last year.

She pulls on her black jacket. "I'm going home, babe," she directs at the lanky red-head behind the counter.

"No, I'll drive you."

"It's five blo-"

"Non-negotiable, Larx. I'll explain on the way. You two: wait here," he says seriously. "Reno will take care of you."

At first, I thought Axel and Reno looked the same. I guess I never really compared them before, but now that I'm actually talking to his twin, I can see the differences. They're small, but the twins aren't completely identical. Axel's eyes are deep emerald and clear, intense. But Reno's are cloudy, almost turquoise and relaxed. Axel is thinner, much thinner, less muscled than Reno. Reno's hands are made more for art than piercing, Axel's more for piercing than art. But they are similar, very similar. Probably why their tattoos are so different.

"I've heard of you, but who's this?" Reno asks, pulling out a cigarette.

"This is Riku. We've been friends a long time."

"Prynne isn't all that big. Why haven't we met?"

"I...don't get out a whole lot, I guess..." Riku replies, disenchanted by the presence of a stranger.

That's the biggest problem with Riku. He sucks at making friends. It's not that he's antisocial, he just doesn't know how to deal with people. His parents were never home, and he didn't have any siblings. Scratch that -he probably had plenty of half siblings. He just didn't know them. He warmed up to Sora quickly, but didn't talk to me for months after we moved here. He didn't talk to any of the other children, mostly because they picked on him over his unique hair color, among other things. But Sora wouldn't leave him alone, always there with him. He called him 'pretty' a lot when we were younger, didn't really understand the concept that the older kids would just pick on them more if people called him pretty. But the other children finally started coming around, the younger ones, mostly. Wakka, Chappu, Tidus, Kairi, and Selphie. Then there was that blond boy... What was his name? We were always fighting. He was older than me, I think... Doesn't really matter, I guess.

That's what memories are for: to forget. We try to save the ones we cherish, but they get distorted. While the bad ones only become more clear. They're to remember not to repeat the mistakes of the days before, or the years before. Mystery boy from my childhood? Not notable. He didn't cause enough damage to be worth avoiding in the future, or mean enough to me to try to hold on to.

But Quinn...I would remember him the rest of my life. And I would have taxis drop me off two blocks from my house, watch my drinks carefully, and carry my keys between my fingers. Just in case.

A/N: I'm sorry this didn't get up sooner, I've been having computer trouble.

So, I've been thinking of doing the Riku/Vanitus thing as a separate story, like a side story or whatever, because I don't want to make this story much more than ten more chapters, and I feel like if I go into their stuff, it'll get too long, so if you're following this story for that, you can message me and I'll give you a heads up for when I start that. (Which isn't likely to happen until Loving Corpses -my Cloud/Seph story- is finished. Sorry~)

Well, thank you to all for making it this far, I hope you'll consider reviewing.

Thank you especially: Lord and Sis, for your continued review and support, the couple favoriters and the five followers. Have a nice day ^_^