Thank you for the great response last chapter, everyone. You guys are the best. I'm in kind of a rush so I don't have time for much of an A/N, but I hope you enjoy this chapter. As always, let me know what you think.
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February 14th
Stunned, McDonald watches as Spencer's face changes. It becomes darker as she recounts the story of finding Winters attacking her girlfriend. The tears stop and her voice becomes little more than a snarl.
"He was violating her." She looks sickened at the thought, or perhaps the memory. "She kept saying 'No, no, I don't want this', but he didn't listen. He didn't stop. He was enjoying it. He was getting off on her terror."
Anger radiates from her, almost like physical heat, and McDonald feels himself shrinking back. He doesn't have the words to respond to this raw, unbridled pain. But the story isn't finished, and Spencer barrels on, her anger encouraging her.
"He was hurting her, and I…" She looks away, clenching her fists. This is a new side to her; it's so different to the vulnerable, reticent girl she was just an hour ago when she first came in. It's more like the accounts of her given by the officers who arrested her. They listed her as 'aggressive, hostile, and reluctant to cooperate'. He can understand now where that hostility stems from. "I couldn't stop it. I couldn't save her."
Suddenly, in a burst of movement he'd assumed she was incapable of given her present state, she's on her feet. She grabs the chair and hurls it across the room, where it smashes into the door and tumbles to the ground. She's breathing hard, hands balled into fists, a wild look in her eyes. She makes no apologies and no move to upright the chair.
McDonald pauses, waiting for her to calm down a little, before he carefully stands up, picks up the chair, and returns it to its place. He gestures for her to sit, but she doesn't. Instead she starts pacing, reminding him again of a wild animal trapped in a cage, and he watches her warily. This burst of violence hasn't quite shocked him, exactly, but it has made him more cautious. Spencer is on edge, possibly even dangerous if she's pushed.
"Do you need a moment?" he asks.
She glances up at him, considering his offer. And then another wave of fury takes over her and she slams her fist against the table. It makes a loud crack, and it looks like it would hurt like hell, but she doesn't even let out a whimper. He's equal parts impressed and concerned.
"I couldn't save her!" she exclaims again, and he recoils at the anger and self-loathing in her voice.
He considers saying something like 'It wasn't your fault' or 'You couldn't have known' but he knows that will be of no comfort now. Whatever happened, happened, and he has a feeling that trying to make things right now, trying to console her, will only make things worse. So he stays quiet while she rages, pacing, shouting, until she flings herself against the wall and he's forced to intervene.
He wraps his arms around her, as gently as he can, scared she's going to do some real damage if she keeps hurling herself at the wall. He manages to coax her back into her seat, and she folds her arms and glares at him. Then, as suddenly as it came about, her anger dissipates. She slumps in her chair, seeming smaller without her rage.
"It's my fault," she mumbles.
"The rape?" he says, confused. "No, that wasn't -"
"No." Her voice is sharp, but soft. "Not that."
"Then what? What do you think is your fault?"
"What happened after."
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