Chapter 21.
On the first day at school after winter break, Kirihara jumps onto Yukimura's back in the lobby. Rather, he hugs him from behind with enough force to knock them both into Sanada, who catches them.
"I'm so glad you're okay, Yukimura-senpai!" Kirihara says, nearly crying. "I was so scared when you thought you were sick again!"
Yukimura smiles and pats Kirihara's arms, which are wrapped around his chest. "It's okay," Yukimura says. "Now will you please let go? I'm stepping on Genichirou's foot."
Kirihara backs off. Yukimura turns and smiles at the younger boy.
"I was scared," Kirihara repeats. "Really scared."
"I'm fine, aren't I? I overreacted."
"You must have been scared too."
Yukimura's smile fell. "Well, yes, I was. But like I said, I'm fine now. I need to apologize to the band for missing their show. Did you go, Akaya?"
Kirihara shakes his head. "I hurt my knee and couldn't put on my pants."
"You're wearing pants now," Sanada points out.
"It's less swollen now," Kirihara says, rolling his eyes. "And it's wrapped up in a knee brace. It's fine."
"That's good."
Kirihara stays with Yukimura and Sanada until they leave to go to their separate classrooms. Kirihara goes to his class—he isn't particularly close friends with anyone there—and sits at his desk near the window.
Kirihara stares out the window, staring at the bright reflection of the sun on the snow to stay awake, and desperately wishes it were still winter break. Nothing beats sleeping in and hanging out with his friends all day. Well, skating comes close, but usually he does that with his friends too. He doesn't even have a skateboard on him today because he broke a wheel when he fell and still needed to fix it.
Ugh. School sucks.
He's in the middle of his second class when his phone buzzes in his pocket. He frowns, pulling his phone out under his desk, and sees a message from Zaizen.
Let's skip and meet up at McDonalds near Hiyoshi's.
Kirihara grins—he is totally up for that.
Before he can reply, he gets a message from Hiyoshi. Must have been a group text.
It's the first day back. Give it at least a week before trying to turn me into a delinquent.
Kirihara snorts and types, We ran from cops on ur bday.
Hiyoshi replies, Fair point. Text me when you guys are on your way.
It takes Zaizen the longest to get there. Kirihara decides to wait until next period to come up with some bullshit excuse—"My stomach hurts and I think I'm gonna throw up, can I go to the nurse?"—and walking out through the side door. He sprints to the front gate, grinning, blood pumping in his veins.
Zaizen comes up with the best ideas at the best of times.
More importantly, he gets to see his friends, he gets to see Hiyoshi. Why is he excited to see Hiyoshi in particular? Kirihara didn't know. He isn't gay, that's for sure, but he isn't going to deny that he likes being with Hiyoshi—really likes it.
He's so fucked isn't he?
But it's not like anything will ever come from it. Just because Hiyoshi is gay doesn't mean that he likes Kirihara, who plans on never ever acting on his feelings, whatever they may be. He isn't going to mess up his relationship with his best friend over awkward sex dreams.
Relationship isn't the best word. When did everything involving Hiyoshi become so damn complicated?
Kirihara hopes on a bus, ignoring the look the driver gives him, and sits down. He puts in his headphones, puts on Zero to Hero, and tilts his head against the window.
"And as I gently sip this drink,
I think about my lack of future,
And all the places I could learn to fall in love.
"I know I shouldn't waste my time,
Wishing I'd been better designed,
Yet for some reason still think:
"I am wrecked. I am overblown."
Kirihara nearly misses his stop, running to the front of the bus to get off. He makes his way to Hyotei then to McDonalds since he only knows his way there from the school.
He gets a text from Yukimura when he shows up at Hyotei High.
I came to your classroom to get lunch and you weren't there. Are you skipping?
maybe…?
Just make sure to gets notes from someone in your class.
And don't do it again!
Kirihara is really glad that Yukimura is okay.
Before he shoves his phone into his pocket, he texts Hiyoshi that he's on his way to the McDonalds and heads towards the restaurant. He gets a burger with fries and a large milkshake then sits at the window. He's barely there ten minutes when Hiyoshi shows up.
Kirihara holds out his fist for a fist bump. Hiyoshi taps his fist gently.
"What's up?" Hiyoshi asks, out of breath.
Kirihara frowns. "Did you run here?"
"My friends caught me ditching and chased me half the way here. I lost them when Shishido-san tried to tackle me, missed, and hit his head on a pole."
"You have friends?" Kirihara asks with a shit-eating grin.
"Shut up." Hiyoshi rolls his eyes. "Is your knee any better?"
"Huh? Oh, yeah. Just pulled something. Nothing major."
Hiyoshi nods again then goes to get lunch.
Zaizen shows up within the next few minutes, ordering enough food for several people—Kirihara ends up stealing half of it.
.
They don't skate—none of them have their skateboards in the first place—so they seek out local arcades. Some employees give them sideways, judgmental looks, since they should be in school, but no one turns down their business. After several hours, Kirihara wins a small Pikachu plushie that he names Waka-chu to piss off Hiyoshi.
Zaizen takes them to an obscure music shop. Kirihara takes a picture of the name and sends it to Marui, who likes these kind of hole-in-the-wall places with vinyl and outdated CDs and posters of hipster bands on the walls. Marui's new boyfriend likes them too. Kirihara spots some Zero to Hero CDs for sale and grins—Hiyoshi must do a half decent job of circulating them through the area after all.
By the time Zaizen is done in the store, school has been let out and there's nothing to do but wander the streets, cracking jokes and laughing like they own the city. Hiyoshi's jokes are more subtle, more sarcastic and witty, than Kirihara and Zaizen's overly brazen, crass jokes. Kirihara is sure he only catches half of them; Zaizen seems to get more of Hiyoshi's jokes.
"Let's grab dinner," Kirihara says eventually.
"We ate lunch earlier," Hiyoshi points out, frowning.
"Yeah, earlier," Kirihara says. "My family eats dinner early. I can't help it if I'm hungry."
"I can't go," Zaizen says.
"Why not?" Kirihara asks.
"I promised my mom I would be home for dinner. I have a longer train ride home than you, Kirihara, so I gotta go now if I want to make it on time. See you guys later."
Kirihara and Hiyoshi spend far too long in a run down diner watching skateboard videos on Kirihara's phone. They're on the same side of the booth sharing Hiyoshi's headphones. Kirihara slumps into the seat and leans against Hiyoshi, who doesn't mind, just takes control of the phone and shows Kirihara some street skating group he had never heard of before.
"Nice find," Kirihara says. "I want to try that on the rails when it gets warmer out."
"I was thinking of getting a board, one with sharper turners."
Kirihara makes a vague noise. "Good idea. I want to get my painted or something. I still need to get my broken wheel fixed."
They finally leave the restaurant several hours later when the waitress tells them they need the table. They take their time leaving, lingering outside of the diner.
"You should catch your train and head home," Hiyoshi says.
Kirihara frowns. "I don't really wanna go home."
"Are your parents fighting again?" Hiyoshi asks.
Kirihara shrugs. "No more than usual."
Hiyoshi doesn't press the matter. Kirihara is glad because the real reason is that he doesn't want to leave, doesn't want to stop this, doesn't want to say good-bye. How much more cliché can he be?
"Let's go to the park. It's the only place you have a chance of seeing the stars from."
Kirihara didn't know you could see the stars out here, with the city and all, but he decides to humor Hiyoshi. It's better than leaving, after all.
Half an hour later, they're lying on the grass in front of the park bench instead of sitting on it, their bags resting behind their heads as makeshift, lumpy pillows. The air is cold, the ground even colder, but Kirihara can't seem to care as he listens to Hiyoshi point out the constellations in the night sky above their heads.
"That one is—"
Who is he kidding? He isn't listening. He's staring at the curve of Hiyoshi's lips, the way he smiles a bit as he talks about some hunter. Kirihara never really got the point of looking at the stars, but he certainly likes looking at Hiyoshi.
"Are you even listening?"
Hiyoshi turns his head, gazing at him like he is more important than the specks in the sky, and Kirihara's resolve dissolves in stardust.
"Fuck it," Kirihara says.
"What—"
Kirihara kisses him.
He closes his eyes, not wanting to see Hiyoshi's reaction. For several long, painful seconds, Hiyoshi does not react at all, his lips still and breath nonexistent. Kirihara feels his heart exploding in his chest and realizes this was a mistake, he messed everything up with this stupid kiss.
Then, Hiyoshi kisses him back.
He hadn't messed up. Thank fuck.
Kirihara slides a hand to Hiyoshi's jaw, guiding their mouths to a better angle. Hiyoshi leans into him, so warm, so real, and this is so much better than his dreams. Hiyoshi is clumsy, or maybe Kirihara is, who knows. Kirihara doesn't care.
Kirihara pulls back, chewing on his bottom lip nervously. His hand is still cupping Hiyoshi's jaw. His heel is against Hiyoshi's throat and he can feel him swallow. Hiyoshi's pulse feels stronger and his breath speeds up. He looks serious.
Hiyoshi asks, "You're not fucking with me, are you? Because if this is some joke, or you just wanted to know what kissing a guy would be like—"
"Do you really think I would do that to you?" Hiyoshi doesn't answer. Quietly, Kirihara says, "It's not a joke." He rubs his thumb along Hiyoshi's cheek. "I know you're a boy and I'm confused about that because I like girls, but I thought I could ignore it and I can't. I tried, but I can't."
Hiyoshi sits up. Kirihara's hands falls to the ground.
"Hiyoshi?"
Hiyoshi rubs his face. "You're not the only one who was trying to ignore it, idiot."
"You mean—"
"I'm not saying it. Even you're not that stupid."
Oh.
Kirihara remains lying next to Hiyoshi, who leans back on his hands.
"What now?" Kirihara asks.
"I don't know," Hiyoshi says. "What do you want to do?"
"Do you want to hang out again sometime? Without Zaizen, I mean."
"Let's start with that."
.
Kirihara and Hiyoshi do not kiss again or hold hands or anything like that. They bump fists (really awkwardly) when they part ways at the train station. Kirihara gets home before dinner and hides away in his room, putting on Zero to Hero loudly. Marui's love songs don't make sense, but they do make him want to dance and sing.
What the fuck is he getting himself into?
Kissing his best friend, his gay best friend, fuck he's totally gay or bi or something isn't he? And now they have a date planned? And what is with the happy restlessness that is thrumming through his every bone?
He lies on his bed and calls Yukimura, who picks up on the third ring. "Akaya, are you okay? Did you oversleep on the train and end up in a strange town again?"
That was one time, Kirihara thinks. One time.
"Um, no," Kirihara says. "Are you alone?"
"Yes."
"I mean, are you alone-alone, or are Sanada-senpai and Yanagi-senpai right there?"
"Genichirou is practicing for kendo and Renji has an interview with a school he applied to. Akaya, what's going on? Are you jail? Do I need to post bail?"
Kirihara laughs. He rolls onto his side, his phone trapped between his head and his comforter. The only sound between them is Zero to Hero.
"I kissed a boy," Kirihara says. "My friend—the gay one I told you about."
Yukimura pauses. "And?" he asks expectantly.
"Is that weird?"
Kirihara can picture Yukimura's comforting smile. "No, Akaya, it's not weird."
"You won't tell anyone, will you? Not even Sanada-senpai?"
"Of course not!"
"Okay. Thanks."
They fall into silence.
"Um, well, that's all," Kirihara says. "I just needed to tell someone, I guess. See you tomorrow. Can we get lunch?"
"Sure. I'll see you then. And Akaya, thank you for trusting me."
"No problem, Senpai."
Yukimura hangs up. Kirihara leaves his phone pressed between his ear and the bed. He thinks of Hiyoshi, and he smiles, and he isn't even sure why. That has to mean something, right?
A/N: The song Kirihara listens to is "Attractive Today" by Motion City Soundtrack.
Also, I apologize for the crazy late and relatively short update. Be patient and hopefully inspiration will come to complete this fic! Give me slack too since it's been awhile since I wrote this.