I don't own Bleach or KHR
21. Sorrowful heart
Rukia didn't want to talk to Kyoko after the healing accident. She didn't want to hear what Kyoko thought of her, whether she thought she was weird or strange. It was an awkward situation that Rukia didn't want to mess around with. It was bad enough that she had to hear Grimmjow's constant scolding for three hours, telling her that it was wrong to do that.
"Grimmjow, I kinda made a mistake…" Rukia was making dinner while Grimmjow was sitting on the couch.
"What kind of mistake?" Grimmjow raised an eyebrow.He didn't like where this was going already.
"I used my powers to heal Kyoko's ankle." Rukia muttered, hoping that he heard what she had just said, but that was not the case.
"What the fuck is wrong with you? I mean, seriously!Using your kidou on a civilian? You know that is against the rules both in the Kuchiki family and the mafia itself. We, under any circumstance, are NOT allowed to show our kidou to civilians. We could have the fucking Vindice coming after us. It was bad enough that we are both runaways! I'm surprised that our fucking boss didn't send the Vindice on your heels when you ran away. Be careful next time, stupid bitch, we don't want to ruin this peaceful life that we created, now do we?"
Rukia had a headache by the time the lecture was done. She started to sketch stick-figure models to practice positioning. She looked at the calendar on her drawer, "Tomorrow's June 7? Has it been that long?" she put the sketchbook and pencil on the floor, she turned off the light and drifted into a light slumber.
x-x
Rukia woke up early to draw the sun rising, if she was lucky she would meet up with Yamamoto. Rukia looked at her chappy the rabbit alarm clock. Its luminous green numbers read 5 am.
"I've got to eat something before I leave. Or I'll be hungry all day," she said to no one in particular. She grabbed the cereal box, a bowl, a spoon, and the milk, and poured herself a bowl. After she ate she put the bowl in the sink to wash later. She took her schoolbag and sketchbook, walked to the door and left a note on the table before she left.
Grimmjow--
Sorry for making you angry yesterday, I'll make it up to you somehow. I'll going to Tsuna-san's house after school. Order a takeout because I don't want to find the kitchen destroyed, you fool.
--Rukia
She closed the door and locked the door. She left the building pretty early. The sun was not up yet. She sprinted to the park where Yamamoto usually went through before heading towards the batting cages. Rukia sat down on the bench and started to draw her surroundings. She could hear a voice inside of her:
"What are we doing here?" the voice asked, it was Orihime; she was in her spirit form looking at Rukia.
"Hey Orihime, I was just sitting here to sketch my surroundings. I like it better when the sun is about to rise."
"Are you waiting for someone?"
"Well, usually Yamamoto-kun comes around here around right now and I wanted to meet him."
"By now? Then he's late?"
"Now that you mention it, he is late…" Rukia pondered on it. It was unusual for Yamamoto to skip up on practice. Rukia's suspicion came down to two things. He overslept and skipped practice or something bad happened. She just hoped it was the first one.
"You're worried, aren't you? He'll be okay!You'll see him at school. Just ask him if he's alright and if he isn't ask him what's wrong." Orihime chuckled, "You are always thinking the worst possible scenario - it's almost amusing sometimes."
"Leave me alone! Why does everyone pick on me? I mean, it was the same back at the manor." Rukia said, her mind wandered to the times when she was picked on.
x-x
Rukia was sitting on the kitchen; Orihime came in the room with Grimmjow. They sat on the opposite side of the table. Orihime was talking to Grimmjow.Two weeks had passed since the chocolate incident. Rukia enjoyed the peace and quiet, that is until Ichigo and Renji came in the dining hall.
"Hello Renji, Ichigo," Orihime waved while Grimmjow snarled. Or at least he tired to with as much voice as he could make.
"Morning Orihime, Rukia, mute-y." Grimmjow wanted to protest but no sound came from his mouth. Rukia let out a big sigh and turned to Renji.
"Renji, where is nii-sama?"
"Boss? Well our boss left this morning to meet with the Vongola 9th, even if we are fighting with them we still need to be on good terms with them."
"Why you want him? Do you want to ruin our breakfast with that heavy awkward silence between you two? I mean you and the boss aren't on the best of terms are you?" Ichigo asked continuing on, "I mean you are single and a lonely shrimp so for you, it's understandable." Rukia's eye started to twitch. Renji changed the subject before Rukia exploded.
"So you guys want to go to the park or something?"
"But Renji, don't you have work?" Orihime asked.
"I'll do it when I feel like it," Renji responded.
"That's not what you say when nii-sama's here." Rukia rebuked. Orihime let out a sigh and let things take their course, like everyday in the Kuchiki manor.
x-x
Rukia went to school and sat down in her desk. It was late, after lunch, and she was tired. She was up pretty early waiting for Yamamoto, but he never showed up. 'I guess he decided to skip practice this morning… he must be coming to school with Tsuna-san and Gokudera,' Rukia thought. Orihime nodded in agreement. Rukia got out her sketchbook and started to doodle on the page. Something felt strange about today; her heart was telling her that. She heard the door open and saw Tsuna and Gokudera come in, but she didn't see Yamamoto anywhere.
"Good afternoon Rukia-san, what's wrong?" Tsuna asked, noticing Rukia's worried face.
"It's… nothing. But where's Yamamoto-kun?"
"Wasn't the baseball idiot with you?" Gokudera scowled at the mention of Yamamoto's name.
"He didn't… Didn't he come to school with you guys?"
"No, if he did, we wouldn't be having this stupid conversation, now would we?" he frowned ferociously.
"Gokudera-kun please…" Tsuna pleaded.
"My apologies, tenth!" Gokudera looked at Tsuna and Rukia. They both looked worried, "How dare that bastard worry the tenth." Tsuna raised his head, realizing something important.
"What's today's date?"
"It's June 7… why?"
"Oh," Tsuna said with his voice took on a sad tone. "That explains a lot… Then he won't be coming to school today." He turned to Rukia, "Rukia-san will you go to Yamamoto's house after school?"
"Why, Tsuna-san?"
"Please go, I think he needs you more than anything now. If only we didn't do so badly on this exam, we wouldn't be here." Because of the fight with Mukuro, they had missed their study periods, and failed the exam. Gokudera failed on purpose to accompany his precious tenth. Grimmjow came in the room with a stack of papers in his hand. He slammed the stack of papers on his desk and sat down, only to stand up again when his soul pager started to react.
"Shit! Why does it always activate during class?!" He opened his cell phone and saw three red dots on the screen. He let out a big sigh and turned to the class. "Look brats, I've got a matter to attend to, so class is canceled."
At once everybody started cheering and packing up their things. For once, Rukia was grateful for a hollow attack. Anyways, Grimmjow was bored with teaching kids and he wanted some sort of action. Tsuna and Gokudera picked their things up and started to leave the room, with Rukia following behind them.
x-x
Rukia was pondering about the thing about Yamamoto; he didn't come to school today. Her heart was telling her to go and talk to him. Tsuna looked at Rukia worriedly
"Rukia-san, you should go and talk to him." He looked up and saw the darkening sky. "Looks like it's about to rain… Well, I'll see you later… let me know how it turns out, ne?" He turned to Gokudera, who he had been trying to ignore their conversation for privacy. "Gokudera-kun, would you like to come over for dinner? Of course, only if you want…"
"It would be an honor tenth!" Gokudera said ecstatically. They reached an intersection and split ways. Gokudera started to walk with Tsuna, but stopped abruptly. Without turning around, he told Rukia, "Tell the idiot sorry on my regards."
He and Tsuna walked away. Rukia turned around and started to walk towards the sushi shop. Rukia felt Orihime's spirit walking beside her. Rukia had a sad expression in her eyes.
"Rukia, it's going to rain soon," Orihime said in a matter-of-fact sort of way.
"I know."
"You know I always wanted to be like the rain, touching everyone's hearts, knowing how they feel."
"I know..." Rukia repeated softly, picking up the pace and finally breaking into a run, running, just running towards Yamamoto's home.
x-x
Rukia made it to the shop before it started to drizzle. Tsuyoshi gave her a warm smile and waved at her.
"Miss Kuchiki, what brings you here so early? I thought you were at school!" Rukia sensed his aura around him, it made her heart sink deep, deep into her shoes.
"Yamamoto-san, where is Yamamoto-kun?" Rukia watched as his smile began to disappear. Tsuyoshi stared at Rukia, eyes full of pain –not hurt pain, sad pain- and forming tears.
"Shall I make tea for both of us?" Rukia offered. Tsuyoshi shook his head slowly.
"Let me close down the shop and I'll be with you in a moment."
Rukia watched as Tsuyoshi started to close down the shop, heavily, as if his years had finally gotten to him. Rukia snuck into the kitchen and brought some tea herbs out of her bag. It was going to be a present to Tsuna's mom because she had heard that she liked tea. 'Oh, well. I'll make more of this later.' It was a secret Kuchiki tea mix that only some of the captains knew. She started to brew the tea when she heard someone come into the kitchen: it was Tsuyoshi.
"Miss Kuchiki, you didn't have to trouble yourself!"
Rukia ignored the man and set a cup of freshly brewed tea beside him. She sat down across from him. Only by looking at the calming steam did Rukia dare to ask her question.
"Will… will you tell me what's wrong? I mean if you want to, I don't mean to intrude on family business." Rukia looked up to see tears sliding down the man's face.
"Today," he began, he cleared his throat, "Today is the anniversary of Takeshi's mom's death" Rukia looked away quickly, staring at the floor.
"I'm sorry… I didn't know. I knew I shouldn't have asked."
"It's okay… besides now you're Takeshi's girl, aren't you? Sooner or later you were going to find out." Tsuyoshi drank a bit of his tea and began telling his story.
"It was 9 years ago. It was raining hard, just like today. Takeshi's mom was coming from work and died in a car crash. I... I wanted to rip my heart out... stab it into pieces, when I saw him coming to me, smiling, asking, 'Is mommy home yet?' and when I knew I had to tell him… " He drank a little bit of his tea and continued.
"After her death I began to enclose myself in the shop, working and ignoring him. The truth to me was if I worked where Ayumi liked to be, it felt like she had never left. I got careless and lost track of Takeshi entirely. Then one day I remember sitting in my room after working and I remember what he told me:"
Tsuyoshi entered the kitchen after closing down the shop. He cooked dinner for Takeshi and went into his room, laying there, thinking. He heard the door open and sat up to see 6-year old Takeshi enter the room.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"Where did mommy go?" Takeshi peeped out.
"I told you: mommy went to heaven.Now go away and leave me alone." He stood up and pushed Takeshi outside his room into the hallway, shutting the door. He could hearsobs coming from the outside the door.
"She's with the angels! I'm sure that if we ask kindly, mommy will come!" came Takeshi's muffled voice.
"She is never coming home Takeshi, alright? She's dead and it's all your fault." Tsuyoshi covered his mouth with his hand, not believing what he said. He opened the door and saw Takeshi with a grin on his face.
"Daddy…" Takeshi said, looking his dad straight in the eyes, wearing a solemn expression. "I don't think mommy would be happy if she saw you crying like this. I remember mommy saying that in tough times, you should always smile, no matter what. Because smiles… smiles make everyone else happy… and when they're happy…" Takeshi started crying and wiped his eyes on his sleeves. "You're happy too."
"Takeshi…" Tsuyoshi kneeled down and gathered Takeshi into his arms, hugging him tightly to himself. How long had it been? A long time, that was for sure. "I'm sorry… I'm sorry for saying those words that I said… Can you forgive this old fool?" Tsuyoshi patted Takeshi on the back as he cried harder.
"Daddy -sniff- you should always wear a smile -sniff- because mommy loved smiles," Takeshi's voice wobbled.
"Takeshi, I love you."
"I love you too, daddy."
"It made feel like such a fool. I still don't know why he didn't hate me for it. It hurt him worse than it did me, but he never took it against me. However, every year on this day he locks himself in his room and doesn't come out. The next day he comes out of his room looking like nothing ever happened." He trailed off as Rukia stood up, noticing the burning passion in her eyes.
"Thank you, Yamamoto-san," she said, bowing to him.
Rukia decided to find out for herself. She left Tsuyoshi and began walking upstairs. As she reached Yamamoto's room she felt an aura that made her heart sink the lowest it had ever been. She knocked on the door; there was no answer. She decided to knock again, this time she built up all the courage she had and let her instincts take over.
"Yamamoto-kun? Are you there? It's me Rukia. Please open up and let me in." There was no answer from behind the door, so she decided to try again.
"Yamamoto-kun if you don't open the door I'll blast this door open," she said boldly. Not receiving an answer from him, she leaned her back on the door and slid down and pressed her forehead against her knees. She sat there until she heard someone unlocking the door. She quickly stood up and entered as soon as the door opened.
Yamamoto was sitting on his bed, looking out through the window. He turned around and looked mournfully at Rukia. He had large bags under his swollen, red eyes. In the silence, Rukia heard the rain drumming down on the roof and the window had rivers of water pouring down from it. I won't be going home anytime soon, she thought.
She walked over to where Yamamoto sat, hunched over, and plopped herself next to him. He gave her a sad smile, which had no realness in it.
"Rukia, what are you doing here?" Yamamoto asked dully.
Rukia's eyes wandered around Yamamoto's room, stopping when they found a picture in a frame on his desk. It was a woman in her late twenties with long brown hair, with onyx black eyes and a smile that reminded her of Yamamoto. She turned towards the window, and together they sat in silence, watching the rain hammering down. Rukia knew she was going too deep on the matter, but she had to get Yamamoto to open up to her even if she needed to open up to him more.
"Yamamoto-kun, your dad told me about your mother's death. I'm sorry about it…"
"It's okay Rukia, I'm fine." He gave a weak smile. Rukia felt as if someone had carved away a hole in her heart; it hurt her so much to see Yamamoto so… so unlike Yamamoto. Sad.
"Then why are you faking your smile? You know you don't need to hide your real emotions in front of me." She cupped her hand on his cheek. He turned away and stood up, facing the window.
"It's not of your concern, Rukia. Why don't you just go home?"
"Not until I know that you are really alright."
"I told you I'm fine, now leave," Yamamoto hissed angrily. Hearing him speak like that took Rukia by surprise. She stood up and wrapped her arms around Yamamoto, crying.
"I kind of know how you feel, Yamamoto-kun… I lost someone, too, in the past. It was my fault that that person died. We can't live in remorse and hide behind things: we must face our fears, our regrets. Remember that you're not alone: I have you and you have me. We have our friends, so you don't have to hold it in Yamamoto-kun." Rukia stood in silence for a minute. She waited, waited for what seemed like an eternity. She was about to give up, when she felt Yamamoto turn around and hug her back. She felt his hot tears fall on her head. She stood there in silence and listened to what he had to say.
"It's my fault, I made mom hurry home. If it wasn't for my selfish thoughts, she might still be here with me." His voice got softer, breaking. Rukia started to walk backwards, not letting go of her grip on Yamamoto. She sat down on the bed next to the window. Yamamoto let his head rest on her lap.
"It's not your fault Yamamoto-kun, it was an accident. Some things are just out of our reach, and all kids are selfish, at one time or another. Besides, your mom wouldn't want you to act this way."
She ran her fingers gently through his hair. The rain seemed to have lightened up, and the sky seemed a shade lighter. This somehow revived her spirits. She was too involved with the sky to notice Yamamoto rise up. She turned her head, eyes locked on the sky, meaning to look over at him, but froze as he grabbed her face and started kissing her. It took her by surprise and she gasped in shock, which gave Yamamoto a chance to deepen the kiss. The kiss lasted for a few minutes before Yamamoto pulled back. He gave a small smile and wrapped his arms around her waist.
"Thank you," he whispered into her ear. "Thank you for everything, Rukia."
He pulled her down on the bed, to lie with him. The Rukia lay still, reading off the clock '8:01.' Soon, Yamamoto's breathing evened out and she felt his chest slowly rising and falling. He was finally asleep. Rukia felt the aura of a spirit approaching the room and cursed herself for leaving Sode no Shirayuki at home. She dropped her guard as she saw the spirit float through the door.
"Are you… are you Ayumi?" Rukia hesitatingly asked the spirit. The spirit looked exactly the same as the woman in the picture, but the only difference was the pair of white wings on her back. The spirit leaned over and planted a kiss on Yamamoto's forehead. The sprit then looked at Rukia, and let a small smile appear on her lips.
"Yes, I am Ayumi. I am Takeshi's mother. Who are you?"
"My name is Rukia and I'm…" Rukia began to blush, "I'm his girlfriend." Rukia couldn't really move, otherwise she would have woken Yamamoto up. "Why are you here?"
"I sensed that there was something wrong with Takeshi and decided to come and see him. But I can see that he is in good hands." She smiled and started to fade away until all that was left of her was her echoing voice. "Please take good care of him. I'll drop by again from time to time."
Rukia wasn't sure what happened, but suddenly her eyes felt heavy and could barely keep them open. She fell into a deep slumber.
x-x
It was morning and Tsuyoshi walked up the stairs and opened the door to Yamamoto's room. He saw both of them sleeping peacefully and the sun gently shining on them. Yamamoto still had Rukia in an embrace, with a smile on his face. Tsuyoshi couldn't help it but to smile at the sight.
'Ayumi…' he thought in his head. 'Our son has found a good girl… I hope you're watching how happy he is.'
"Yeah he is…. I can leave him in her hands, Tsuyoshi." Tsuyoshi looked up in surprise, looking around trying to find out where that voice came from.
"I have to stop mixing sake and tea before bed." He shrugged off that familiar voice and he continued looking at the two that were sleeping. "Thank you, Miss Kuchiki, for everything." He slowly closed the door and went downstairs to open the shop, letting the two teens sleep the day away.
There it is chapter 21, Beta-ed by hokkyokusei. She also changed a few things so it would be more angstful. (which I appreciate it)
It somehow seems shorter than the last chapter, huh?
Anyways, I want to thank DarkWolf0270 for letting me use her story for part of this chapter. The story is called 'where did mommy go?' It's a really good story, so go read it for yourselves when you have time. Also read her new story 'like father like son.'
Please review,its like chicken soup for the writer.
Anyway see ya next chapter.^^