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Stark

This time was different.

Stark knew it as he felt the familiar pull dragging his soul from his body to the Otherworld. He had a hunch, and he was right. This time was different. Neferet had changed something, done something else with him. He didn't think he was going to be seeing Will and Heath this time.

Stark closed his eyes and took deep breaths. Though he would never admit it, he was frightened. The feeling he had was not a good one. It was dark.

Suddenly, he felt himself fall, like that dream people sometimes have when they're barely asleep. They fall, but never land. Stark knew that just like in that dream, he wouldn't land.

After a while, he opened his eyes. And just like that, he wasn't falling anymore. He felt a lot better, until he actually took in his surroundings.

He wasn't in the Otherworld, that was for sure. He wasn't anywhere. He was just in darkness.

Stark panicked. His stomach sank and he felt completely and utterly hopeless, like he would never see light again.

And he had another instinct. Stark knew, just like he had known that he wasn't going to the Otherworld, that he was stuck there forever. Unless Neferet changed her mind (which was very unlikely), then he would be stuck there, with that horrible, sickening feeling of hopelessness, forever.

Zoey

How was I supposed to choose between Heath and Stark?

I stared at Neferet, open mouthed, until I realized that it probably wasn't smart to let her know exactly how bothered I was by this. I looked away from her immediately and, with a high, cold laugh she flounced out of the room, leaving me with my friends and my ex-consort in my Warrior's body.

I turned to my friends, horrified. Judging by their expressions, so were they.

"That's so unfair. I can't believe anyone would do that," Damien whispered.

"It is Neferet we're talking about," Shaunee countered.

"Still, though! How anyone could make someone decide the fate of someone is just disgusting!" Damien shouted, giving the door that Neferet left through a dirty look. Then he looked at me. "Are you okay?" he asked, suddenly calm and gentle.

I nodded, feeling totally surreal. Damien was right, obviously. It was just sickening that someone could actually enable somebody else with the power of deciding whether to let someone live or die. It went against nature.

But then again, so did we. We weren't immortal, but no one was supposed to live as long as we do. I couldn't believe I was even considering this, but I was. I was actually considering going against nature. Bringing back the dead. After all, Stark had been brought back when he died. Why shouldn't Heath?

No. I was doing it - doing exactly what Neferet wanted. Doing what she did with Stevie Rae, Stark and the red fledglings. I loved having them back, but it wasn't right; I knew that. So the right thing to do here would be to send Heath back to the Otherworld and bring Stark back here, where he belonged.

I looked up at my friends, then my eyes fell on Heath.

"Zo?" he asked tentatively.

I didn't say anything, just continued to stare.

"Zo," Heath continued. "Don't worry about upsetting me or anything. I know that you'll do the right thing."

My heart fluttered when I realized that Heath assumed I would send him back. I really wasn't fair to him at all.

"Heath, I love you," I told him, though he already knew it. He smiled. "And I don't want you to think that I love Stark more than you or anything, because I don't. You've been my best friend since forever, and you're my consort, and you and Grandma are the only ones who've stuck with me since I was Marked."

I didn't know why I was telling him this, I just felt that I had to. Heath was the friend that had always been there, and you felt that you owed it to yourselves to try it and see how it went, but it didn't really work out. But you still loved him.

"Zoey, I know," he told me, taking my hands. I had to look away. It felt wrong to look into his eyes when they weren't his. They were Stark's.

And then I understood what Neferet wanted to do, though how it contributed towards me being unsuccessful in defeating Kalona, I wasn't sure. Neferet thought I would choose Heath, so then I would be tortured for the rest of my life by seeing Stark whenever I looked at Heath, a constant reminder of what I did and how it affected Stark. But if I chose Stark, I would live with the knowledge that I could have saved Heath, and didn't.

"You're going to do the right thing," Heath told me again.

"What do you want me to do?" I whispered.

He looked away. "I really don't know, Zo. I love you and I'd love to stay with you, but I couldn't live with myself knowing that I'd taken Stark's life, you know?" He smiled lopsidedly.

"Yeah, I know." I said.

"It's okay," Heath said, smiling. "The Otherworld's not so bad."

Though his smile was big, it didn't meet his eyes. And I knew that Heath wanted to stay here, and I wanted him to too. I just didn't want Stark to have to be the sacrifice for that.

"What do you guys think I should do?" I asked, turning to my friends and away from Heath, hoping it would help to clear my head a little.

"I couldn't even begin to consider it," Stevie Rae told me truthfully. "I mean, yeah, I'm not Stark's biggest fan, but that doesn't mean I should decide whether he returns from the Otherworld or not." I nodded.

"Z, Heath's right, you'll make the right choice, you always do," Erin said, smiling encouragingly. I rolled my eyes. Of course she wouldn't take any of the burden from my shoulders.

"You shouldn't mess with any of it, Zoey. You should keep things the way they were," Damien said, adding a quick, "sorry, Heath," at the end. Damien was seeing it the same way I was.

"I really don't know, Z," Aphrodite said, giving me a look of sympathy - and just that, coming from her, made it all even worse for me, if that was even possible.

"Priestess, the decision is yours," Darius said. "We can give our opinions, tell you what you already know, but at the end of the day it's up to you. You must decide."

I took a deep breath and nodded. "You're right. Just.. I just need some time to think about it ... Do you think Neferet has a time limit or anything?"

Aphrodite snorted. "Doubt it. As long as you make whichever decision she wants you to make, she's good with time."

And Aphrodite made me realize that it didn't actually matter at all what I wanted to do. I had to make the decision that Neferet wouldn't want. And I had to decide which one that was before she realized that I wasn't thinking about myself, or even Stark and Heath for that matter. I was thinking about her and whether she could be destroyed or successful by my decision.

I think I might finish this soon, I might not make it as long as Burned. Should I continue with Burdened when I'm finished this or just leave it and start a new one? Songs I listened to while writing this are Taylor Swift Should've Said No and Katy Perry Thinking of You =]

~TOB