The slow, sleepy smile that spreads over Blaine's face at his words has to be the most beautiful thing Kurt has ever seen.
"I did not, as a matter of fact," Blaine says. "But it's good to know, thank you."
He doesn't say anything more, and the unsaid words hang in the air between them. Kurt wriggles his toes impatiently, but he is, in fact, not overly worried. He isn't really sure (can one ever be sure?), but he thought...He turns over to look at Blaine, and when he sees the little smile and the overly innocent look he gets in return, he knows he's being teased. He huffs incredulously and poked Blaine in the belly with his index finger in revenge.
"What?" Blaine asks innocently, scooting away from the poking finger and laughing.
"Oh, I don't know," Kurt says. "There's this silly social convention that requires you to say it back when someone tells you they love you. Only if you feel like it, obviously. No biggie."
"Right! I totally forgot about that, thanks for reminding me." Blaine grows serious; the laughter is still there, in his eyes and in his voice, but his face is earnest. He rolls to his side, cups Kurt's face in his hand and looks at him. "I love you, too."
Kurt had wanted to ask, "Really?", just to be sure and also because he's rather enjoying himself at the moment, but when he looks into Blaine's eyes, he's caught. He doesn't need to ask anymore; everything he needs to know is right there in Blaine's eyes. He doesn't feel like teasing anymore, at all.
"You love me," he says, full of wonder. "You really do."
"I really, really do," Blaine says and kisses him. "And not just since yesterday, too."
"Since when?"
"I don't really know. I started to find you...interesting when you opened the door and insulted my clothes."
"No, really? I'm still embarrassed about that. I was so rude!"
"Yes, but you were also strong, opinionated. Not to mention gorgeous. You made quite an impression on me. I remember having a very good feeling about this job."
Kurt smiles. "It has turned out pretty well, hasn't it? Despite everything?"
But Blaine apparently hasn't quite finished his walk down memory lane. "And then, when you gave me the hickey...when I was able to think again I started to imagine what sex with you would be like if a simple hickey could make me feel like this..."
Kurt is a little embarrassed now, but the question needs to be asked. "And did it...live up to your expectations?"
"Are you kidding? I'm still wobbly in the knees, and it's been two hours."
"Which would mean that now it's...shit, Blaine, we have to be out of the room in an hour!"
Blaine groans and sits up. "Shower blow jobs?"
"If we are very quick."
...
They work hard for another two months. The day they send in Blaine's manuscript for editing, they celebrate with champagne and another visit to Axis, this time with Santana, who is back on her feet again, though she takes it easy with the dancing.
Two weeks later, Kurt declares their choreography for finished. They will still practice every day so they won't forget any of the steps, and there are still parts that could work better, but they should be done with that in an hour a day or so. All of a sudden, there's not much left to do.
Kurt hasn't talked to Blaine about his insecurities. There's been too much to do, he reasons, and anyway, Blaine said "I love you", too, hasn't he? So he should be committed to their relationship just like Kurt. They'll figure it out, even with living apart and everything. They have nothing to worry about.
Still, his heart clenches when he sees Blaine looking up available apartments on his computer, and more when a few days later, Blaine says,
"So, I've scheduled a few appointments with realtors to look at the apartments I checked out earlier, and I'm flying to New York next week. I'll stay a week, probably. Do you want to come?"
Kurt thinks. He should, go check on the studio and his place, and he wants to, but...he needs to practice being without Blaine constantly by his side. This can be an opportunity for them, he decides, to test how they'll be doing when they're apart.
So he tells Blaine no, and adds, a spur-of-the-moment decision,
"I should visit my dad, I'll do that when you're away. He's been bugging me to come, I haven't been there since Christmas, and apparently, he can't leave the garage long enough to even come to Columbus for a weekend."
Blaine looks a little disappointed, but he smiles and walks off to ask Santana if she'll need a plane ticket.
Blaine and Santana leave for New York, where they will stay at Kurt's apartment (although Santana probably won't be there often, if at all) and one day later, Kurt drives to Lima. The tension in his shoulders he didn't know was there dissolves as soon as he hugs his father, and God, it is much too easy to forget how good it can feel to be home.
"So, your year's nearly up," his dad asks over dinner. "How are things?"
Kurt smiles as he chews, then answers. "Really good. The book is already at the publisher's, and our routine is finished, too. We'll be ready on time."
"And you and Blaine?"
Kurt is about to say "We're fine," but sighs. "It's good. Like, it's incredibly good. I'm kind of waiting for the other shoe to drop, and I'm scared it will drop when we're not living together anymore. I mean, it's not always been easy, this past year. Like you said, we fought over the most ridiculous things, and I really wasn't aware how much I value my privacy, but...We've grown together, and I like it. I'm scared that we'll grow apart again."
"But you've done all this before. I mean, you've been together without living together,"
Kurt hesitates. He could tell the truth now, it's probably not a big deal anymore, and he can trust his dad not to tell anyone. But then, his dad was never one to accept being lied to, and he can really do without a sermon. He can't deal with his dad being disappointed, not now, on top of everything else. So he just says,
"Yeah, you're right. It's just, I actually think that for us, living together might really be easier."
Kurt, his dad and Carole spend a long, mostly enjoyable evening catching up, and when Kurt finally goes to his old bedroom, he finds he has a missed call and a message from Blaine (no phones at family dinner – he still abides by that rule). He listens to it while getting ready for bed.
"Hi, I suppose you can't talk right now. Um, your cactus is fine, and I've emptied the mail box, there's nothing that looks important. I looked at the first place today, and it was a catastrophe. Really, if all of them are like this, I'll have to sleep in a tent on your fire escape. I miss you, but don't call me back, I'm being forced to go out. Bye!"
Kurt calls Blaine back the next day, and they spend nearly an hour on the phone, only hanging up when it's time for Blaine to leave for the next apartment he's looking at. They talk every night, and Kurt gets little texts during the day that mostly contain of photos of one or more broken things at the places Blaine looks at – and still, Kurt misses Blaine. The last night before they both plan to return to Columbus, Blaine sounds nearly desperate on the phone.
"I can't believe all the places I've looked at are crap, Kurt! I mean, the only place that looked halfway decent had so many hidden costs that they nearly double the rent, and all the other ones – I have never seen so many levels of decrepit in my life. And time is running out, there's only a little more than a month left until we have to move out. I mean, do I really have to choose between the apartment with the cockroaches or the one with the mildew?"
What the hell, Kurt thinks. "You know, you could...I mean, we've lived together, and it's been going pretty well, and we are really together now...and if you wanted, we could make a second bedroom out of the study, but I hope not, because I like having you in my bed..."
"Kurt, wait! Let me get this straight. Are you offering...are you asking me to move in with you?"