~Gio: Joker~
Waking up seems impossible, but somehow I do it anyways. My body aches like hell when I try to sit up. Atty's quickly by my side helping me. "Thanks," I say, my voice groggy and through clenched teeth.
"How're you feeling kiddo?" he asks, putting the canteen in my mouth before I can answer. I drink some water. "Fine." That doesn't really mean fine, of course. It means as fine as I can be when literally the simplest task is torture.
"Look away if you're freaked out by homemade stitches." I do as he says and Atty changes out some of my bandages. Ori wakes up just when Atty is finishing up with that task, examining the place where Dream cut my whole finger off with his hatchet. That's the worst of my injuries, it's slowly making me go bonkers.
"Morning," Ori says, wiping his eyes. By now, his black hair (laced with red highlights) is everywhere and he's pretty much given up on taming it. Having my hair unkempt makes me kind of anxious, so I've tried to keep control over it. It's not as nice as I would've liked but it's at least okay. Atty's dark hair has pretty much lost its part by now and he's given up on that too. Then there's that one fucking patch of facial hair… That is noticeably longer than the rest… God, that drives me nuts.
"Morning kiddo," Atty says, releasing my hand and tossing Ori a canteen.
"How are you?" the question is mostly directed at me, and we're so fucking exhausted Atty doesn't even make a sarcastic comment.
"Piss balls," I say quietly. By now I've stopped caring about swearing. I hurt, dammit. Everywhere. It's miserable. I can have a potty mouth if I want to.
"I'm sorry…"
"It's not your fault." I sigh quietly.
"I wonder what's in store for us today," Atty says, looking to be in thought. There are so many horrifying possibilities, I honestly don't know what would be the worst.
"Yeah," Ori sighs. Only bad things, that's for sure.
"I'll go get breakfast," Atty says.
"Do you want me to come with you?" Ori asks.
Atty shakes his head. "I'll be fine." He sounds pretty sure of it. How can he be so confident when he's in the Arena? Must be his werewolf sense.
"Okay…" Ori sounds slightly hesitant. "Just… Don't go too far. Be really safe. Promise?"
"Yeah, sure."
"I'm serious, Atticus! It could be dangerous." Everyone has a fatal flaw. I think Atty's is that he doesn't take things like this as seriously as he ought to. He pretends like he knows everything. He's pretty reckless.
"I know. I'll be fine. You stay here with Gio, I'll be right back."
"Okay…" Ori nods a bit. We know that Atty can protect himself just fine, but we definitely can't protect ourselves or each other without him. Atty walks off, knife in hand, while Ori and I sit and wait for him to get back.
"Hopefully nothing bad happens to us…" Ori says, chewing his fingernails nervously. "I don't want the Games to keep going… People keep on dying. I don't want any more people to die."
There's some more silence before a memory comes back.
"She asked me." I kind of startle myself remembering it.
"Huh?"
"Juli. She asked me to ally with her."
It was kind of awkward eating breakfast the morning of our third day of training. I was just exhausted, frankly, mentally and physically. I'm usually a fairly quick learner but going from station to station has caused a bit of an information overload. I was honestly surprised I hadn't had a panic attack up to that point.
Ichabod, our escort, tried to facilitate conversation. Tess and Braxton, the mentors, talked about dumb things, like the aroma of summer in the air and the roses that were starting to grow in the Capitol. Juli pushed her food around her plate nervously. I tried to make myself eat but was so nervous I felt like I was going to upchuck anything I ate. After all, private sessions were going to happen that afternoon.
After breakfast, Juli and I walked together, letting the mentors go up ahead.
"How are you doing with allies?" she asked me. I could see a questioning look in her eyes, similar to the look Abri always has when she's ready to ask me something.
Abri. Oh God, I miss her so badly. I want to be home with her. I'd rather be anywhere but here. She and Juli knew each other. They may've even considered each other friends. They were the same age, after all. 15. And now Juli's dead and Abri's alive. Thank God I took tesserae so she didn't have to, or else it very well could've been her that was reaped. That thought makes me absolutely sick.
"Uh, okay I guess." I still remembered freshly that Atticus was talking to Pontifex. Which meant that he wanted to go with the Careers, surely. Well, that's what I thought at the time. I did have Ori, though. "I'm going to team up with the boy from District 8. Ori. How about you?"
"Well, I have a couple girls I'm allying with. And I was wondering if… Maybe… You'd like to come with us."
"Me?"
"We are District partners. And you're pretty… Nice." Pretty non-threatening, I'm sure she meant.
"I can't say no to Ori…"
"Dawn said she was going to ask him about it. And Krissa, from 11, said she'd ask her District partner too." The 13-year-old.
"Well…" I shifted. I guessed it was only fair to add, "Well, I was kind of talking to the guy from 10, too."
Juli looked slightly stunned. "…Ten!? The really strong one?" No wonder she was so surprised. I never thought someone like him would've picked to go with someone so weak like myself.
"Yeah. I'm not sure what he's doing though…" He's so secretive.
"Well… We were just kind of looking for people that… Aren't… Trained." I knew he was really intimidating.
"Yeah… Well, we'll see."
"I don't think the others would want such a presence like his… He's kind of…"
"Shady. Yeah, I know. He might just have it out for me, who knows?"
"That's a risk."
"I know. I'll have to think about it." He seemed genuine when we talked. But why would someone so strong and powerful even consider teaming up with the liability? It was really a decision for me to make, and me alone.
And I decided to trust him.
A decision that so far has done me good. I probably wouldn't be alive right now if it wasn't for Atticus. I trust him… Maybe too much I trust him. We're dependent on him.
He comes back with breakfast and makes a fire to cook it over. We eat, taking our time to do so.
Ori puts a hand in his pocket and suddenly lights up. "Hey, I just remembered!" He pulls something out of his pocket, opening his fingers to reveal what they are: Little, tiny white seashells. I've never seen one in person before.
"I found these on the beach," he says, running his fingers over one of them. "There were three and they're practically identical." He offers one to me and one to Atty. We take them and I examine it in my palm. It's really pretty. "I meant to offer them to you earlier, but…"
"Better late than never," Atty says. And never is a real possibility.
"Yeah," Ori says quietly.
"We're a team," I say. "The three of us. We're a team and we stick together."
"Always," Ori smiles. At least that thought is somewhat reassuring. The fact still lingers that we're in the Games, and Atty in particular seems to remember that and looks slightly on-edge.
"Let's keep on moving today," he says, putting out the fire and pocketing the seashell and getting up, rather abruptly. "The Capitol doesn't like stationary tributes."
"Will you be up for moving?" Ori asks me.
"I'll be fine." We all know what that really means by now. Atty shoulders a backpack and Ori takes another one. Together, Atty and Ori help me up, and they take turns helping support me as we walk. We makes quiet conversation as we walk, and Atty seems pretty on-edge. We keep on walking until I think I'm going to just about collapse from the sheer misery. We sit and take a break, and things become a lot less comfortable when we hear a low rumble.
"Dammit," Atty hisses, before turning to us. My heart's skipping beats, and Ori's pale. "Sorry for the short break. But we have to move." Suddenly we hear a big crash behind us as a tree hits the ground. Atty takes off running, supporting me as he goes. "Don't look back, and don't let go." He takes Ori's hand and holds it tightly as we go. More rumbling, I hear cracking as the ground starts to separate.
Put one foot in front of the other, Gio… We're a team…
Atticus groans with effort trying to support me and keep on moving. "Don't let go," Atty groans through clenched teeth, "Don't let go."
Suddenly, the ground beneath Atty begins to crack, which is bad because he's in the middle. I hold on desperately. "We're a team and we stick together." I can't lose them. Not now. I hold on, but suddenly a chasm appears between Atty and Ori, and the grip slips. Ori yells but a tree hits the ground so loudly I can't hear anything. Suddenly Atty starts to fly away from me, too.
"Don't let go, Gio! Whatever you do don't let go!" He keeps moving, but running with the weight of me is practically impossible for him. The ground cracks under my foot and suddenly I know that Solitaire's doing this for a reason.
"Gio!" Atty screams, "Don't-"
"Let go!" I tell him. "If you don't you're going to get us both killed!"
"GIO!" he sounds panicky, which sends even more fear through me, but I know I have to be brave.
"I'll be okay! Find me! I'll be fine!" Translation: "The next place you see my face will probably be in the sky."
Atty lets go and I fall a bit before my feet hit the ground. The backpack he was carrying hits the ground next to me, and before I have time to get him to take it, I can't see him anymore.
It's hell, but my survival instinct makes my feet move forward anyways.
Sudenly, I hear a cannon and my heart drops. Not long afterward, the ground stops, and the Arena is drawn back into quiet. But this time, I'm all alone.
That's when I finally break down. Panic attacks aren't really foreign to me, but that doesn't mean I can deal with them. I curl up into a ball in the darkness of night, the thought that one of my allies might be dead dancing around in my head and making it harder and harder to breathe. Tears push out of my eyes and I gasp on sobs. I can't do this anymore. I can't survive on my own. I can't do anything and I never could.
I was always dead from the moment I stepped food in the Arena. I was always nothing but dead, and all Atty and Ori could do for me was delay the time it took for that to happen. I cry and gasp for air, and feel like I'm dying right then and there. I cry into my knees, the pain catching up to me. I have no idea why Atty would give me this. I'm just as well as dead. I cry quietly for a long time, as the sun sets into the darkness of night.
When I hear the first note of the Capitol Anthem, I snap out of my panic, looking at the sky, heart beating hard. The face in the sky, isn't Ori's or Atty's, thank God. It's Dawson, from District 5. I feel bad, but relieved.
Not too much later after that, I hear a snap of a twig and look up to see wide eyes of the girl from District Two.
I scramble to grab my sword, but can barely make myself move.
She stares at me for a second, probably surveying the helpless look in my eyes, and just when I'm about to beg for mercy, she disappears into the bushes, leaving me in the silence.
I try to make myself stay awake, but eventually the exhaustion and the pulsing pain make me fall into a dark, dreamless sleep.
~Tristabelle: Three of Clubs~
I wake up the next morning as the sun's high up in the sky.
I sit up and rub my eyes, tightening my pigtails even though I'm sure I've got hair everywhere. It's another shitty day in this shitty arena, and who knows what'll go on today?
I have some breakfast successfully hunted and cooked (though not skinned very well), and then see a parachute falling from the sky, immediately going to get it. It's pretty small, and just a bottle of iodine, but I still feel grateful. It means that there are still people that have faith in me and my ability. And I need that.
Hopefully it's not some old guy, or anyone basing it off of appearance. I'm a fighter and I think I've proven that. I have the best strategy and that'll get me through.
I keep the iodine in my pocket, organizing the rest of my limited supplies. Then, I do a little bit of walking before I hear the rumbling that signals another Solitaire Chiarella Arena gimmick.
I don't care if it's practically afternoon, it's still much too early for this shit.
The ground starts to crumble and I see a tree in the distance topple over, hitting the ground with a low, resounding boom. I take off, running to the place will provide the best shelter.
The ground starts to crack and crumble, everything shakes so harshly it's hard to run. Cracks start to form under my feet, causing me to watch my step and have to jump. I see a figure off in the distance, Tuesday it seems, going the other way, but I don't stop.
I'm a fighter, and I didn't make it this far to go down like this. I run until I see a pavilion, and since it looks pretty stable, I decide to make my way there. I gain my balance again, stumbling along until I make it under the pavilion, where I can stop and catch my breath for a second. I don't have much time to breathe before a huge, heavy force sends me to the ground, knocking the air right out of me.
"Fuck," I mouth, but the word doesn't come out other than that.
"I try to move but I can't move the giant slab that fell on top of me. I try with all my might to move it, and nothing I do works. I try for a long time, until I'm pretty much ready to give up. Within the struggling, a cannon booms, and all that matters to me at this point is that it isn't for me. I keep on trying to get the rock off. I refuse to die by being trapped like this.
Suddenly, I hear footsteps and look up, with wide eyes. Motherfucker, it's another tribute…
It's the boy from District 8. Ori. I groan and try to move the slab of pavilion that crashed down as the rest of the Arena stops rumbling. Ori looks pretty beat up, emotionally and physically, but he just stays still and watches for a second, as if debating what to do.
"Are you okay Tristabelle?"
"Just fucking peachy." I try to twist my body to get a better angle on the debris. Before I know it, the bastard from Eight is by my side, helping me!
"Hey, I'm just fine. Hey!"
"Sure you are," he grunts with effort.
"Stop helping me, I don't need help!" I try to push the debris off of myself but Ori doesn't quit. Bastard.
"Sure you don't," he groans. Together, the combined efforts of the two of us moves it off so I can wiggle out of the wreckage. Dammit, I told him not help me! But… I probably would've been helplessly trapped without him.
Dammit, I can't kill him. Or, at least, not now. Not right after he helped me.
"Are you alright?" he asks, looking genuinely concerned.
"Fine." There's a pause. I know I shouldn't talk to him more, but I have to ask. "Did you really make it this whole way by yourself?" I doubt it, of course, but if he has an alliance, then… where are they?
"No. I… Lost my allies in the earthquake." He looks upset. "I… I heard a cannon and…" he looks like he might cry. "I just hope they're okay… If Gio or Atty died…"
I really don't have time for this. "I'm sure they're fine." Now I just need to find a way out of the conversation.
"If you wanted an ally for a while-" he offers, but I cut him off.
"No. Thanks for your help earlier but no. May the odds be ever in your favor." Then I turn around and leave. I know that if I want to win he has to die, and it was his own incentive to help me. I didn't ask him for anything, so I don't owe him anything. I couldn't kill him then, I mean, come on, I am human (believe it or not). But… I couldn't do it.
I reorganize my stuff and sit around, trying the best I could to tend to the injuries I got thanks to the crash of the pavilion. I wish I had been able to save myself. I know I couldn't have done it without Ori's help. Even so, I feel weird that I had to accept his help. I started the Games with a promise to have help from nobody and help nobody, and I already broke that promise.
It's still not an ally. I'll be okay. I'm a fighter.
The face in the sky tonight belongs to the 15-year-old from District 5, Dawson. I didn't know much of him. He tried to get me to ally with him, but I rejected the advance. He just wanted peace, the Arena wasn't a place for him just like it's not a place for Ori. I just hope their deaths are… fast. Easy. Or, well, as easy as death could be. I don't like to think about it.
I have no one to win for but myself at this point, but I still want to win just as badly as those who have people at home. I have to get home for a second change. I have to get home for a life in which I don't hate everything. I have to win for the chance of a life in which I don't mistrust anyone that talks to me. That's why I have to win. Not for the validation of anyone else but myself.
And that may make me sound selfish and bitchy and all that shit, but I always forget that I'm a powerful person and I'm valid and maybe winning the Games will give me some sense of self-worth.
And that's something I need just about as much as Tuesday needs to get back to her boyfriend.
I lay down in the silence of night and take a breath of fresh air, dozing off into a light sleep.
A/N: Alright, one more death and we're down to the final 8 and there will be a break chapter for the family/friend interviews. When it gets to final 8, I'm going to consider starting into other tributes' POVs. One of mine will still win but I may go into other tribute POVs, but only with explicit permission from their authors. So if your tribute is still alive, let me know. As for the next death, I have no idea who it's going to be at this point.
Chapter Question: Of my tributes that are left, who would you most like to see win? Who would you most like to see die?
Points:
Kate: 188
Dreamer: 133
Jess: 191
magicharity: 163
hopefuldreamer1991: 80
Sinfonian Legend: 185
xQueen-of-Applesx: 40
Lady Lysa Arryn: 56
rising-balloons: 75
superneet1214: 6
Coolgal02: 61
epictomguy: 34
Medium-Indigo (Guest): 60
AbbyCorabby123: 10
falyn. oliver: 43
seaotter99: 22
ThisWorldWeHate: 17
Blonde4ever: 62
Beauty. Is. Strange: 61
Ibbonray: 35