The rest of the afternoon I was absorbed in my own thoughts, trying to figure out if I should ignore Sasha's summons, or go to

meet her that night. I was worried that if I didn't go, she would show up and be angry, which would in turn cause questions

to be asked by the guys. And then they might find out about all the games that Sasha and I had run on people, and about the stealing.

We had homemade pizza for dinner, with tall glasses of milk. I ate what I could, so they didn't all start asking me about

my lack of appetite again.

As the early evening arrived, I was still struggling with what to do. I was so worked up that my stomach was hurting.

I thought there was no way I could go outside at nine that night without the guys noticing anyway. That was before I found out

they were going to do some work at a friend's, the next floor down, helping them lay new carpeting, and then hang around there and play some music.

As they were telling me about it, they seemed to all think that I would go along with them.

"I think I'll stay here," I said, trying to sound casual.

Peter and Davy looked at me, surprised.

"You don't want to stay here all alone again tonight, do you?" Peter asked.

"It's fine," I assured him. "Really."

Davy was looking puzzled, too. "There's gonna be a couple of girls there around your age," he told me. "Cousins of Don's."

"Oh."

"It's a good chance for you to make some new friends," he went on.

I was really at a loss for words. Since I'd told the guys that I did want to make new friends, it was going to look weird if I resisted

going.

I thought quickly. It was around seven-thirty now. I could go along for awhile, and then make an excuse to go back down to the pad, and

then slip out to meet Sasha. So I told Davy that I would go along, and he and Pete both looked so pleased that I felt a rush of guilt.

When we all got downstairs, we were greeted by Don and Carrie, whose apartment it was, and another couple, Lee and his girlfriend, whose

name I couldn't remember. And the two teen girls that Davy had told me about, the ones that were cousins of Don's. Their names were

Lila and Pilar, and they were friendly. It turned out that they lived several streets over, and would be going to the same junior high school

as I would, when school began.

I was actually enjoying myself, talking to the girls. It was nice to be with kids my age who were 'normal'. Not like Sasha.

We went into another bedroom and were listening to the newest record from the Beatles. When I saw that there was only ten minutes

or so until nine o'clock, I felt regretful, but I got to my feet.

When I told the girls that I had to go, they seemed genuinely sorry to see me go. We exchanged phone numbers, and they went on listening

to the record, while I went in search of at least one of the guys. Peter would be my best bet, I thought. Easier.

But when I went into the crowded bedroom, where the carpet was being laid, there were guys everywhere, crawling around on their knees,

and using hammers to tack carpet pins to the floor.

I hesitated at the open doorway. Don saw me first.

"Hi," he said, in a friendly way. "You and the girls getting along alright?"

"Yes. They're really nice."

"Good," he said, and when he'd stepped away, I thought that I had no time to waste. Sasha would seize on any excuse to

do something to hurt me.

So I picked the closest one of the guys, which happened to be Mike. He was standing up, and coming over to the doorway, where he

grabbed a handful of carpet nails out of the box by the door.

"Hey, Mike," I said, and he turned to look at me.

"I'm gonna head back upstairs," I told him, keeping my voice low.

"Somethin' wrong?" he asked me.

"No," I thought, scrambling for something to tell him. "I-just have a little bit of a headache, that's all."

"Yeah?" he asked, looking concerned.

"It's not bad or anything," I said quickly. "I just think I'll go to bed."

"Okay," he said.

"You guys will probably be quite a while here yet, won't you?" I asked then.

For a moment, I thought Mike was on to me.

"Probably," he said, looking thoughtful.

"Well, I'll probably head to bed then, like I said," I said in a rush. "See you all in the morning."

"Okay," he said again.

I said goodbye, and left quick. I dashed upstairs, and thru the pad, and then out the patio doors, and down the stairs,

trying to keep my heart from pounding.

Once on the beach, I slowed down a little. I was on my way now. I wasn't going to break a leg getting there. Let Sasha wait.

There were a few people out, walking the beach. When I got closer to the big boulder where Peter and I sometimes sat after our

swimming sessions, I could make out the shadow of a person, and the lit, red tip of a cigarette.

I slowed my steps.

"You decided to come, huh?" Sasha's asked. "I thought you weren't going to show."

"I'm here," I said.

"How'd you slip away from your babysitters?" she asked, laughing.

I didn't even answer that, but it didn't start her from continuing. "They seem as though they keep a sharp eye on you," she said. "More

like jailers, aren't they?"

"They're not," I defended. I gathered my spunk. "I didn't come here to talk about them. What do you want?"

Sasha tossed the cigarette to the ground, and took a couple of steps nearer to me.

"Tough girl," she said. "I need you to help with a couple of jobs that I've got lined out."

"You said you'd get somebody else," I reminded her. "I told you I was done with all that stuff."

"Well, it's actually shocking, but not that many people are interested in this line of work," she said, and she laughed again, and I thought

she sounded like a maniac.

When I didn't say anything, she went on. "We actually made a pretty good team, Beth."

"I don't want to do anything like that anymore," I said. "It's bad enough whenever I remember it."

"It's a couple of jobs. And then you can be done. I'll say 'have a good life' and disappear, and you'll never have to see me again."

"I wouldn't ever be that fortunate," I said, with venom in my voice.

"Beth, Beth, Beth," Sasha said, making a clicking sound with her tongue. "You're forgetting everything that I've done for you."

"Done for me?! What have you ever done for me?" I demanded, feeling my anger rise.

"I kept your butt out of juvenile hall, and out of the foster care system," she said.

"How do you figure that?"

"You never got caught, did you? You would have gone to juvie if you'd been caught, but I kept that from happening. And you'd have been

in foster care for sure by now, if I hadn't helped you make money."

I was silent, and she said, in a menacing way, "Two jobs, Beth. And then we'll part ways. If you refuse, well, I think an anonymous letter

could be sent to those four guys who think you're such an innocent angel. I wonder what they'd think if they were to be told about all

the things you've been involved in." In the light from the beach poles, I saw her shrug a little. "Who knows? Maybe I could even put

a few extra things in that letter. Things you didn't actually do."

"They wouldn't believe you," I said, in a near whisper, thinking she was evil, thru and thru.

"Ah, but you're not really sure about that, are you, Beth?" she asked, and I felt a chill going down my back. "They might

believe it. I can be pretty convincing. Even when I write."

"What do you want me to do?" I asked, feeling as though I was cornered.

"Meet me tomorrow morning, just before lunch, about eleven. And in that spot way up the beach where we used to meet at," she told me. "There's

some convention in town, a bunch of teachers on summer break. It'll be easy to lift a few wallets."

I turned and began to walk away. I didn't see any point to continue standing there.

I had gone but a few feet when she called after me, "Be there, Beth! Or I'll be real busy writing that letter!"

I plodded up the beach thru the sand, feeling as though my feet weighed twenty pounds each. Twice, on my way back to the pad,

I had to stop, and double over, feeling as though I was going to be sick.

I climbed the long row of steps, going up to the pad, and pushed open the sliding doors to go inside. I'd started to pull them shut

again, and saw something in the corner of my eye. When I turned, I caught my breath, my heart jumping, at the sight of Mike sitting there, on the

couch. He had his guitar in his hand, and had one foot crossed over the opposite knee.

He laid the guitar to the side as I looked at him, and then he looked up at me, too. He didn't say anything, though, and there

was something about his body language that unnerved me.

"Mike! Hi," I said. "You scared me!"

"I didn't intend to," he said.

I looked at him, not sure of what to say. My heart was still jumping at the surprise of seeing him sitting there. I'd thought that they would

all be downstairs still, at Don's apartment.

"Pull the door closed," he said.

"What?" I said, feeling as if I was in a daze.

"The door. Pull it closed."

"Oh." I turned back to the sliding doors, and gave them another pull to close. I pulled too hard, and one came off the runner at the bottom.

"Uh oh," I said, and looked at Mike.

He got to his feet unhurriedly, and came over to the doors, where he gave a couple of lifts and pulls, and put the door back on its groove,

and then he closed it.

When he'd done that, he went back to sit on the couch again. He recrossed his foot over his opposite knee.

"Where've you been?" he asked me, quietly.

For a moment, I was silent, thinking hard.

"I-I went for a walk," I said. There. That wasn't a lie.

"I thought you were goin' to bed," he commented.

I looked at him, feeling panic rise. It seemed as if he knew something.

"I decided to go for a walk," I said, sounding lame even to my own ears.

"Is your headache any better?"

"Yeah. It's better."

He watched me for a couple of long moments. "Were the other girls at Don's nice to you?" he asked.

"Yes. They were really nice."

"So you were havin' fun?" he asked.

"Yeah. I was," I said, without thinking.

"And then you got a headache," he said, and it wasn't really a question the way that he said it.

I looked at him, without answering. There was something in his voice. And in his expression. I couldn't put my finger

on just what it was. But it was something.

"I got to worrying about your headache, so I thought I'd come up and check on ya," he said.

"Thank you for worrying about me," I said.

"Uh huh," he said, his eyes still intent on me. "Then when I got up here, you weren't here. So I got worried about that."

I felt my stomach do sort of a loop de loop.

"I'm sorry for making you worry," I said.

Mike didn't really answer that. Instead he said, "Is there anything you wanna talk about with me?"

"No," I said, way too quickly.

He raised an eyebrow, and I tried to smooth it over. "I mean, no, there's not anything. You guys have been so nice to me. And to Gramps.

And we're both so grateful to you. I don't know what I would have done if you guys hadn't come along. I-"

Into my rush of words, Mike said, "Beth."

I stopped talking. "What?"

"If you don't want to talk about anything, then you can just say that."

I looked at him, feeling foolish. And guilty.

"Okay," I mumbled.

"I better get back downstairs to help," he said. He stood up, and walked towards the door. Once there, he paused, and turned

to look back at me.

"Next time you decide to take a walk, let somebody know, alright? I really was worried."

"Okay," I managed to say, my face feeling warm.

MMPD