Spring Can Really Hang You Up The Most

By TG

Disclaimer: I don't own PoT or the title of the story.

Warnings: The usual… Probable OOC-ness, unbetaed, written in under 10 minutes. This is also pre-relationship.

Author's Note: This… I don't know. I almost want to say it's crack but who freaking knows with Atobe and Ryoma.

Summary: "Nya! We lost Ochibi!" "We didn't lose him, we just...misplaced him."

Theme: Theme Park, as suggested by a friend

Enjoy!

"NYA! OCHIBIIII!"

"AHHH KIKUMARU-SENPAI!" Ryoma screamed as a red-headed demon slammed into him, wrapping its tentacles around his body in a glomp of massive proportions. Air supply restricted and vision dimming, Ryoma felt a slip of air escape his throat in a squeak –a last-ditch effort to save his own life before his senpai strangled him to death.

"Eiji! Echizen is turning blue!" The vice-captain exclaimed as Ryoma flailed.

'Thank god for Oishi,' Ryoma thought as he scrambled to put as much distance between him and the demon as possible. He turned around to view his attacker and was only mildly surprised to see that the tentacle monster had converted back to Kikumaru.

"Saa, Echizen. Ryuzaki-sensei told us to take today off of practice, so we're going to a theme park! You're coming, right?" Fuji grinned at him. Ryoma involuntarily took a step back in self-preservation and accidentally bumped into Inui, who pushed his glasses up further on his nose.

Uh, Fuji-senpai, I had plans . . ." Ryoma trailed off and gulped as Inui's glasses glinted unspeakable evils.

"I thought you might not want to go along. If you would rather, I need your help taste testing the next batch of penal-tea," Inui murmured.

Ryoma was cornered. He saw no way out of this that did not end in embarrassment or death, so he figured he may as well accompany his team to the theme park. He could at least have some fun there, right?

"Ah, whatever," he muttered, adjusting his cap. Momoshiro slung an arm around his shoulders and nearly floored him with his excitement. Ryoma allowed himself to be steered out of school grounds and to his house, where Oishi promptly informed him that they would all wait for him to chance.

'Smart,' Ryoma thought. They knew him well enough to know that if they'd left him alone, he'd have attempted escape. The high school freshman changed his clothes slowly, dragging his feet until he dredged up enough courage to return to the insanity waiting for him downstairs.

When he reached the bottom stair, he found chaos. Someone had given Kawamura a racquet and the high school senior was running around the Echizen's living room, shouting "DORRA! BURNING!" while Fuji, Kikumaru and Momoshiro were snickering. At least Oishi had the decency to look mildly horrified at the spectacle, and Kaidoh was valiantly trying to ignore everything. Ryoma turned his eyes to his buchou, silently pleading for a stop to the madness, but the spectacled man just shrugged and turned away. Awesome.

Twenty minutes later they had finally pried the racquet from Kawamura's hands and were on their way to the theme park. Ryoma was already wishing for a swift death to carry him away from the craziness. Too busy thinking about walking in front of a car, he accidentally bumped into someone.

"Ah, sorry," he murmured, pulling on his hat to hide his embarrassment. Ahead of him, his team continued walking, oblivious. A chuckle dragged his eyes back to the person he'd run into and he was only vaguely surprised to find it was Atobe Keigo. Of course it was Atobe, because today Fate had it out for him. He glanced at the disappearing backs of his team and decided on the lesser of two evils. "Monkey King. Want to grab a drink with me?"

Atobe raised a well-trimmed eyebrow at the request but nodded. Ryoma turned and headed toward a drink tent without checking to see if the older man was following. Hm. This might not be quite as bad as he thought it was going to be.

Somewhere in the theme park grounds. . .

"UWAH! MOMO! WE LOST OCHIBI!"

"Calm down Kikumaru-senpai. . . We didn't lose him! We just. . . Misplaced him."

". . . UWAH!"

Ryoma grinned around his ice cream cone as he watched Atobe lose for the fifteenth time in a row. "Ne, I guess duck pond isn't your thing, Monkey King."

Atobe turned around to send him a petulant glare. Ryoma held out his half-licked ice cream cone as a consolation and laughed outright at the offended look on his friend's face.

"Ore-sama will continue until he wins!" Atobe declared and turned back to pay the greedy vendor for another game. Ryoma rolled his eyes and hauled the older man away. Honestly, that game vendor was going to make his weight's worth in gold before Atobe finally won something.

"Come on, Monkey King. Let's go do something else. What's so special about winning at duck pond anyway?" Ryoma asked, tongue curling around a drip of chocolate ice cream. Atobe stared at him strangely and then muttered something about giving him the prize. Ryoma shrugged and ignored whatever madness Atobe was spouting and pointed at a shooting game. "How about that? You can aim, right?"

Atobe shot him a smirk that Ryoma yearned to wipe off that handsome face. The high school senior threw down some coins and the competition was on.

"Fuji, you and Kawamura go that way. Eiji, you and Momoshiro go to the left. Inui and Kaidoh, please go to the right. Tezuka and I will look this way and then we'll all meet back here in half an hour!"

"Usu!"

"I'm glad you finally won something so you can stop bitching about it," Ryoma said, cheerfully picking at the funnel cake Atobe had bought for him. The senior glared at him, so Ryoma blew a little powdered sugar so that it landed on Atobe's dark designer jeans. When the senior tried to brush it off, it just smeared. Ryoma felt the lazer beam glare boring into his skull and had to fight to keep his face blank as he continued to pick at the cake.

"You brat. Ore-sama is definitely not giving you the prize, now." Ryoma shrugged, knowing that Atobe meant for that to be a barb. Whatever, it's not like he needed a stuffed duck to add to his room décor. "You stay here. Ore-sama is going to wash this off."

Ryoma shrugged again and turned away, not really wanting to watch the fuss Atobe was sure to make about the condition of the publish washroom he was entering. So far his afternoon-turned-evening had gone very nicely. He had never known that the Monkey King could be fun (even if he was still insufferable). It was like seeing a different side to the man, and he found himself intrigued.

Suddenly he felt warm, rough hands settle on his shoulders and he was steered toward a green tent that they had not yet explored. He looked up to see Atobe wasn't looking at him, but instead at the tent, and he was wearing quite an attractive smirk (though the freshman would NEVER tell him that).

"What are you doing, Monkey King? I'm not finished with my funnel cake!" Ryoma exclaimed as the precious cake was taken from his hands and unceremoniously dumped into a trash bin.

"I signed you up for a fun little activity," his captor –er, friend –replied. The smirk on his face was both ominous and attractive, which made it very deadly indeed. The Seigaku high school freshman groaned but didn't bother to put up a fight.

He wished he had when he realized what 'activity' Atobe had signed him up for.

"Nyah! Ochibi is not here either! What do we do, Momo!" Kikumaru wailed, tears springing to his eyes as he wriggled in desperation. Momoshiro was about to answer his senior when something caught his eye. Ignoring Kikumaru's verbal explosions, he moved closer and realized what he was looking at. His jaw dropped. Kikumaru waved a hand in front of his eyes but gave up and turned to stare in the direction his junior was staring at. His jaw dropped too.

Oishi and the rest of the regulars spotted them and the vice-captain swooped in for a scolding. "Eiji! You were supposed to meet us back there ten minutes ago! Eiji? Are you listening to me?" Oishi finally realized that Kikumaru was, in fact, not listening to him. He and the rest of the regulars turned to stare in the direction that Momoshiro and Kikumaru were staring into. Their jaws dropped.

"Oh come on, Monkey King. You're just afraid to be upstaged by someone who's younger than you!"

"You wish! Be prepared to be awed by my marvelous musculature!"

"Che, whatever. I'm going to win!"

There stood Atobe and Echizen. Both young men were glaring lazer beams out of their eyes. Both were wearing white t-shirts, and both were soaked to the bone, making those t-shirts completely see-through. Finely-chiseled chests, abs and hips were put on display for all to see.

"It looks like we have a tie!" The wet t-shirt announcer practically screamed into his microphone, trying to be heard over the gobs of hysterical fangirls.

"Oh my," Oishi said faintly.

"But the judges" –here the announcer indicated a table of young men and women –"declare that Echizen Ryoma is the winner!"

"Oishi, you have a little. . ."Fuji trailed off, but his vice-captain was not paying attention, so Fuji reached into his pocket and used a Kleenex to wipe the dribble of blood off of Oishi's nose.

"Ha! I told you I was going to be on top, Monkey King!"

It was at that point that Kaidoh fainted.

Author's Note: So um… Dear friend, I hope this satisfied your request! This is surely the most cracky thing I have ever written. I'm not sure I pulled it off. . .