A/N: This chapter has been a little hard for me to write. It is definitely an M+ rating towards the end. There is some angst-y loving going on. If that isn't you thing, please stop reading after the second break and wait for the next chapter. As always, read, enjoy and review if you would like.

Chapter 20 - Cape

Olivia watched Alex as she drove up I95 to the Cape. Alex looked so at ease as they drove. She couldn't take her eyes off of Alex. She welcomed the peace that Alex was offering. She smiled and relaxed back into the seat.

"You okay?"

"I'm fine."

"You sure you want to go there? We could go anywhere. We don't have to go to the Cape."

"No, it's fine. I've never been to the Cape. It'll be fine."

Alex took a quick glance at Olivia. She was starting to relax the further they got from Quantico. They were only about two hours in their eight and half hour trip. Xander was in the back seat, sleeping. Alex kept making quick glances back into the mirror she installed in the back windshield checking on Xander.

"He okay?" Liv asked, smiling at Alex's diligence.

"He's fine. He's still sleeping. We can stop soon. I'm sure that he'll be hungry."

"I'm sure."

"I know that you are, too."

"I could eat," Olivia replied.

"There is a nice place up here that we can go to. I'm sure you'll like it. We'll get a booth in the back and we can feed Xander there," Alex told her.

"That sounds fine. If you think that it'll be okay, then we're good. I just know that I don't want to stop in New York. Can we go around it? I am not ready for that."

"Yeah, I'll get the GPS to route around when we stop."

"Thank you."

"Olivia?"

"Yeah?" Liv asked back in response.

"You sure that you're okay."

"I'm alright. I am glad to be with you. I know that having you there with me will help me deal with anything. I'll be okay. We'll be okay," Liv told her.

Alex reached over the console and took Liv's hand in her own. Liv smiled at her as she rubbed her thumb across Alex's hand. Alex smiled back at Liv quickly and turned back to the road.

"Go to sleep, darling. We have a while until we are there. I'll wake you when we stop. You need to rest. It's okay, Liv. Take a nap," Alex told her.

"But, what about Xander?"

"He's out for now. It'll be okay. Sleep. I'll wake up, I promise."

"You're sure?" Olivia asked.

"Yes, Liv."

"I can drive later?"

"If you want, just sleep now. I know that you haven't been sleeping well. I'm fine. We're okay. I've got this. You take care of you right now. I'll take care of us," Alex stated.

"Okay, Love," Liv said, sleepily.

Olivia woke up again as Alex pulled up to the beach house at the Cape. She was amazed at the simplistic nature of the large cottage. She knew that Alex's family had money and that she was from the prestigious branch of the Maryland Cabots and political ties. This house betrayed their money. She couldn't believe how large the cottage was compared to the rest on the inlet they were at. She was amazed.

"I know, it's small," Alex stated, getting some bags from the trunk.

"It's huge," Olivia countered.

"This is nothing. You should see the house in Washington and Baltimore. This is just the vacation home. Daddy never planned for more than us to be here. He didn't like to share if he was here. His brothers and other family members always had to ask to come."

"I can see why. The view alone is worth the price. Is it…yours now?"

"I share it with my cousin Stephen, but he doesn't use it."

"Is there a staff?"

"Yes, a small one consisting of two people. They live here and only get it ready for us and clean up when we are gone. They maintain it when we are gone for long periods. They will only come if ask while we are here," Alex told her.

"So, we'll be alone?"

"All alone for the minimum of the weekend, and we can come back whenever you'd like, if you'd like to," Alex stated.

"That would be nice," Olivia started. "Forgive me, but I can see you here as a kid vacationing. After college though, I can't. This seems to scream money, which you have learned to hide. Don't get me wrong, your wealth scares me, but I know that it doesn't define you."

"I don't let it. I don't use it for gain. I only use my money when I need to or to help someone. I have learned living in Manhattan that flaunting money and family names will only get you so far. Once that would have mattered to me more than anything, now, not so much."

"What changed?" Olivia asked.

"My political ambitions…come on, let's go in and get settled."

"Was that my fault?"

"Was what your fault?" Alex asked.

"Did you give up your political ambitions for me?"

"God no. Let's just say that my priorities changed. I realized that power and money don't really mean anything. It was a hard pill to swallow, but I really didn't have a choice. My life was no longer mine. I couldn't be myself while I was in Wit Sec. I had to become something I didn't know how to be," Alex told her as they went into the cottage.

"What was that?"

"I guess you could call it: normal," Alex replied.

Olivia laughed. She couldn't think of anything more preposterous, but on some level she understood what Alex was saying. Alex could see the smile and the recognition of her statement on Liv's face. Alex just smiled back.

"I had them pull out some of my old things and put them in the nursery. Xander will be fine in there. It is right next to our room. I hope you don't mind," Alex said, leading them into what would be the master suite.

"Alex…"

"What's wrong? Did I do something wrong? I can pull the crib in here if you want."

"I think that I need to be alone. Just tonight, maybe. I need to think about what happened."

"I understand," Alex responded, obviously hurt.

"Alex…please…"

"It's fine, Liv. I understand. I don't want to crowd you."

"Damn it, Alexandra," Olivia stated.

"Don't worry about it. You stay in here. I'll go down the hall a bit to my room," Alex stated, dropping Olivia's bag on the bed and then heading down the short hall to the room that had been hers for so many years.

Alex crossed the threshold of her childhood vacation home room and just stopped. She dropped her bags where she stood. She stared at the pictures of herself growing up through the years. A ton of memories, mostly good, came flooding through her mind. Alex knew that Olivia might need some time, and she knew that she found herself again in the cottage. She could only hope for the same for Olivia.

Alex was too busy thinking about the past to hear Olivia come up behind her. She was too preoccupied with the pain of Olivia's slight rejection to notice what was going on around her. She felt like an ass to assume that Olivia would want to share her bed. She figured that she was rushing things. She wanted Olivia so much that she hadn't bothered to think about what was going on her head.

Olivia snaked her arms around Alex's middle and pulled Alex's back into her front. Alex was startled by the contact, but immediately ran her arms up over Olivia's, hold Liv in place. After a few minutes, Alex began to melt into Olivia. Olivia buried her nose into Alex's hair, sniffing the unique scent of Alex with every breath.

"Alex, I'm sorry. I don't mean to hurt you. I really don't."

"I know, Liv. I understand. I'm sorry that I just assumed that you would want to share my bed. I shouldn't have done that. I don't want to push you into anything you don't want. I am sorry, I was just being selfish," Alex explained.

"You weren't being selfish, Alex. I would love to share your bed…always have I wanted to share it, but…I need to be sure of myself before I do that. If I don't trust myself with you, how can I expect you to trust me? I need to be sure.

"I want you, Alexandra, so bad it hurts. God, woman, I would love to take you in that room and have my way with you. The other day was just a taste of what I want, have wanted and continue to want from you. Alex, I want you. I love you. You must know how bad I want to be with you. Just give me tonight, Alex. Just tonight. Let me fight whatever demons followed me here," Olivia told her.

"Talk to me, Liv. Trust me enough to tell me things. Please just tell me how you feel. Make me understand. Don't push me away. I'm here for you. I will always be here for you," Alex said.

"I'm sorry, Alex. There is just so much and all at once…I'm trying to cope with it all. Please just give me tonight. I will give you the rest of the weekend, I promise."

"If you need me, you'll come to me?" Alex asked her.

"Yes, my love, I will," Olivia answered, spinning her around and giving her a kiss.

Alex felt the emotional rift in Olivia and knew that she just needed time. She had waited this long, a little longer wouldn't slack her love for Olivia and she knew it. She was scared that Olivia would succumb to her demons, real and imaginary, without Huang being close at hand. She began to wonder if the trip was such a good idea.

Olivia kissed her again. They didn't want to let go of each other. It was their common need, each other. They both heard Xander cry from the nursery. Alex took Olivia by the hand and walked her to nursery.

Alex stood over the crib, looking down at the small blonde wonder there, and wondered what life would be like with Olivia and him. Xander stared up at them with his soft baby brown eyes. Alex melted. He had Liv's eyes, even though he wasn't her blood. Alex knew that she was lost when it came to the boy. He would have her wrapped around her finger if he could give her Liv's grin, too, and then he did.

"He has your eyes," Alex said.

"You think?"

"I do. He's beautiful, Liv. Just like his mother."

Liv gave her a smile. She reached out for Alex's hand as she touched Xander's cheek. He cooed at Liv's touch. Liv smiled down at the boy and then back at Alex.

"Liv, we all be okay. I promise. I am going to fight for us," Alex told her.

"Thank you. Thank you for everything. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for loving Xander. Thank you for being you," Olivia stated.

"Come on, Liv. He's gone back to sleep. Why don't you take a nap? I'll look to see what we have for dinner and see what we got for little man, here. You're exhausted. Don't fight me on this. You are here to rest," Alex said, taking her by the hand and leading her back down the hall.

"I am tired. But, I know I won't sleep. I can't sleep. I only see the demons when I try."

"Do you want me to lay down with you?"

"Why? So you can be miserable with me? No, you need to live your life without having to worry about me all the time. I have to do this. Alex, I have to do this my way."

"I understand that, Liv. Trust me, I do. But, just remember that I am here for you, no matter what. You can yell at me. You can scream at me. You can push me away. It is only going to make me fight harder for you, for me, for us, for Xander. You are my family," Alex replied.

Liv shook her head. She walked away from Alex and to the bed. She lay down to appease Alex, but hoped that sleep wouldn't take her. She didn't want to fight the demons, not there, not in Alex's place. It was supposed to be sacred there. It was supposed to protect. She hoped that Alex was right and she could sleep, even if it was for only a few hours.

"NO!"

Alex heard the scream and could hear the terror in Liv's voice. She was out of the kitchen and in the master suite in under three seconds. She found Liv sitting up in the bed. She was sweating and had an absolute look of horror.

"Liv?"

Olivia didn't respond. Her eyes were open but she wasn't responding to any stimuli. Alex wasn't sure what to do. She wasn't sure how to make Liv realize that she was okay and with her at the Cape and not in whatever nightmare she thought she was trapped in.

"Liv?" Alex tried again.

Olivia turned and looked at her. There was some sort of recognition, but it was distant and small. Alex actually shrank back a little in fear, wondering what Liv saw.

Before Alex could react, Olivia had Alex against the wall pinning her by both her arms. Alex continued to search for something in Olivia's eyes that would help her bring Liv back to the present. Olivia stared at her for a moment longer before she made any movement at all.

Olivia descended upon Alex's mouth with a ferocity neither of them had felt before. Olivia moaned against the softness of Alex's mouth, but didn't stop the assault. Alex wanted to push against Liv, but couldn't with the way that Liv was holding her against the wall. Olivia didn't stop her kiss even when she felt the hesitation in Alex's mouth.

She moved her hands up from Alex's hands to her shoulders. It was like Olivia needed to keep herself grounded in Alex's body. She tore herself from Alex's mouth and took to her neck and throat. While Olivia was nipping and sucking at Alex's throat, she felt Alex begin to soften. Olivia, however, didn't. She pulled at Alex's shirt but not finding it giving fast enough, ripped it from her body. The buttons and Alex's gasp didn't stop her. The need was too great. The want was too raw.

Olivia leaned back long enough to take in Alex's flesh. She sighed at the sight, but made no move to stop enjoying Alex's body. Alex watched her, afraid to stop her, while revealing in her touch. She gingerly and carefully brought a hand to the back of Olivia's head. Olivia snapped her head up and stared into Alex's eyes. She said nothing, but watched the emotions running through Alex's sapphire eyes.

Olivia didn't stop there. She tore Alex's bra from her. Alex didn't move. There was something incredibly hot about the need and the rawness that Olivia was conveying. Olivia feasted on Alex's breasts, as she roughly teased them with her hands. When the need became too great, she went for Alex's pants. They were deftly removed and tossed aside.

Alex stood before her naked and slightly bewildered. She wanted to touch Olivia too. She wanted to feel Olivia naked against her. But, she knew that in Olivia's state, she couldn't stop Olivia. She didn't want to, either.

Olivia pushed Alex back into the wall. Alex huffed a little, but didn't fuss. Olivia moved back up her body to her mouth. She ravaged it again with her mouth. Alex moaned into Olivia. Olivia took it as a sign of ascension. It was all she needed. One lone hand descended between them and found its mark in Alex's core.

Alex called out Olivia's name as she entered her. The tempo was fast and furious. Alex couldn't keep up and she tumbled over the edge as Olivia took her against the wall. She couldn't help herself. When she called out Olivia's name again, as a second wave crashed over her, Olivia stiffened. It was brief and only for a second. It was enough for Alex to feel it, even though she was lost in throes of orgasm.

"Alex, I'm…"

"Shut up, Liv and finish me on the bed," she demanded.

Olivia picked her up, carrying her like a hurt child and laid her on the bed. Alex wasn't going to let it go. Her need was now raw and not satiated. She wanted Liv and damn it, she was going to have her. Olivia studied her for a few second. It was all Alex needed. She had Olivia on her back on the bed and under her naked body.

Alex made love to her. It wasn't soft and sweet like it had been in Quantico. It was raw, furious, and hard. It was a balm for both of their needs, no matter what the need was. Olivia had been surprised by Alex's grace before, only to be ravished by the raw power of Alex's desire. Olivia had to admit to herself: she liked it both ways.