chapter 21, savannahs story.
I had done yet another runner after my brief reunion with Carlos, I had travelled back home to Portland the morning after and was back at my moms.
I had turned my phone off, Carlos had tried to ring me a few times but I didn't want to be told I was second place to Tammi fucking Taylor again. I had to fly back in to LA on Tuesday to finalize my divorce, we only had to have a meeting about it to sort out the shared assets we had, the more money you have the more complicated a divorce is, not that I wanted anything from Carlos but he was being thorough and going through the proper channels... I expect Tammi was making him do it.
I didn't need anything, I was rich beyond my wildest dreams and not even twenty years of age.
I could not find the keys to the rented house in LA anywhere. I'm sure I had them, but I needed to find them to hand them back to the estate agents. if I wasn't going to live in LA their was no need for me to waste my money on a house I wasn't going to live in.
I was just on my way to visit my brother Sean. It was hard as my mom didn't want him in her house. It was causing a slight friction between us, but she did appreciate the fact it wasn't seans fault how he came to be. so I usually took him out for day trips.
"hi!" I said as I was invited in the house "... How has he been?" I asked Bianca, seans grandmother but also the oddest person that had ever graced the earth.
"same old Sean" she replied. She sounded half hearted like she was either very tired or just couldn't be fucked. Bianca was in her late fiftys, she seemed fit and healthy enough to look after Sean, it wasn't her age that bothered me... It was her and her husbands strangeness that got me.
"he is in his room. He was rude to Ron earlier so he is being disciplined" Bianca said.
"what did he do this time? Knowing that Sean could be little handful at times.
"he told Ron to shut up... He shouted it at him" she explained.
I rolled my eyes. "I will have a word with him... Not sure where I'm taking him today. I've got to fly back to LA tomorrow to sort some things out but I will be back after, so can help out a bit more" I replied.
Bianca just nodded. I made my way up the stairs and found Sean laying in his bed.
"hey seany!" I said cheerily.
He jumped up and almost wrestled me to the ground with a hug.
"woah that's a big hug!" I laughed. "you wanna go out and get an ice cream?" I asked.
"yeah!" He replied.
Sean had just turned four, and was very much a little scamp, but he wasn't naughty, he was just a typical boy. Since dad and heather had died all I had from his grandparents were reports of seans done this, seans done that so the absence of his parents must be affecting him as he was a pretty good kid before.
I helped him put his jacket on and we left the stuffy confinements of the odd families house.
"what do you want to do today then?" I asked as we got in to the cab.
"go to the park?" He replied.
"okay deal!" I smiled. Truth be known I loved hanging out with this little dude, I think I was more immature than him.
We went to the park and got an ice cream after, he was a great distraction from Carlos. After Sean demolished his ice cream I decided to take him out for lunch as he seemed hungry. He demolished that too.
"blimey seany... Your not an animal" I laughed as he shoved a burger and chips in his mouth.
"I'm hungry" he smiled giving me a cheeky grin.
"its only just gone twelve, what did you have for breakfast?" I asked.
"I wasn't allowed breakfast today" he replied.
"what do you mean you weren't allowed breakfast?" I asked shocked.
"I was rude to grandad and was sent to bed" he replied.
"oh I see... Well I'm sure if you had of said sorry to him he would of let you out to eat breakfast" I explained.
"I did but he said I was rubbish" Sean replied.
"what? Why did he say you were rubbish?" I asked.
"I drawed a picture of pickles. He said it was rubbish" Sean said looking sad.
"you drew a picture of some pickles?" I asked.
"the cat, pickles is grandmas cat" Sean explained.
"oh, well why did he say it was rubbish? That's not very nice is it... I bet it was a great picture of a cat!" I smiled.
"grandad was in an angry mood again. He said it was rubbish and when I said it wasn't I got sent to bed" he said clearly still upset about it.
"grandma said you shouted at grandad to shut up? Did you?" I asked
"I did but only because he kept saying my picture was rubbish." He said.
"well what did grandma say?" I asked wondering how she let her husband obviously bully a 4 year old boy.
"she didn't say anything" he replied.
I nodded.
"is grandad always in a mood?" I asked.
"most of the time... I got sent to bed yesterday because I said I missed mommy" he said sadly.
"what?! Sean he can't just send you to bed for saying that, you must of done something? Tell me, I won't tell you off" I promised.
"I didn't savannah... I didn't do anything!" He said getting upset.
"did you eat yesterday... Before you were sent to bed?" I asked.
"not dinner but lunch I did, I helped grandma make a pizza" he said smiling.
I chose not to ask him any more questions. the fact he hadn't eaten for almost 24 hours was ridiculous.
when my day with Sean had come to an end I made sure I filled his pockets with some snacks and told him to put them in his room just incase he had to miss out on more meals because his grandfather seemed to be the reincarnation of Hitler.
When I left him Ron wasn't home, he must still be at work, so I decided to have a word with Bianca.
"Sean told me what happened about the picture... I think it sounded a bit unfair how he was treated to be honest Bianca... He drew a cat and was punished because Ron didn't think it was a worthy piece of artwork!?" I snapped.
She seemed shocked that Sean had told me.
"it was a misunderstanding, but Sean can't talk like that... Screaming at people to shut up! we can't let it just slide by or he will do it all the time" she explained.
"that makes no sense! he was drawn in to an arguement Bianca. If Ron had of just said 'yeah its great' then none of that would of happened... Who on earth tells a 4 year old boy that his picture is rubbish? Also he told me he wasn't allowed dinner last night and missed out on breakfast this morning! You can't do that to him, he misses his old life and he misses his mom. He is just a boy" I snapped.
"yes but Ron is having problems now heather is gone, he finds it difficult to accept" Bianca said defending her husband.
"how on earth do you think Sean feels? Both his parents gone then forced to live in a house with people that are mean to him and in my opinion are neglecting him!" I said bitterly.
Bianca raised her eyebrows to me "I will have a word with Ron, you have to remember that we were brought up differently to how the children of today are... We are doing our best in this situation" she explained
I shook my head at her. "I will be back on Wednesday to see him. I said then saw myself out of the door.
I tried to explain the situation to my mom but she really did not want to know anything about Sean. I would speak with Mackenzie about him tomorrow when I see her... Maybe she could look after him. I hoped he was happy right now, I hated to think of him stuck in his room feeling sad.
The next morning I got up early and got a cab to the airport to fly back to LA. I wondered if Tammi would be with Carlos today. I was prepared and looked my usual gorgeous self. Dressed to the nines and my beautiful blonde hair placed securely on my head. My natural hair was getting there now, the section I had shaved in from the asymmetric bob I had was now just below my ear. I used a hair clip to pin it back as it slowly grew out on the one side.
The flight went by fairly quickly, I hailed a cab to get me to the building that I was going to finalize probably the best and worst times of my life in. I saw the word divorced as a massive fail on my life.
I checked out twitter on my phone. Carlos obviously was feeling emotional. His tweet from this morning read "busy head. Can't sleep"
I for one was glad he was losing sleep. I can't believe he used me like that knowing he was going to get back with her.
As I got the elevator up to the 8th floor in a huge building I was shown in to a room that on any other day I would of found nice. It had a lovely view over LA but all I could concentrate on was the huge dark wood table that dominated the room the solicitor who looked like a middle aged Harry potter and Carlos who had just stood up on me entering the room.
"sorry I'm late" I said to the solicitor.
"I wasn't sure if you were going to show up?" Carlos said to me but I ignored him.
The meeting dragged on for ages, just going through a load of items that I really couldn't care less about, if I wanted to hurt Carlos then I would of demanded his boat, as I know how much he loved it... But as it went on I said I didn't want anything. I wanted him to keep everything that was originally his, even though Carlos was up for sharing it.
I didn't want half of the house, or his car or his motorbike... I didn't want the boat or even the expensive sofa that I had bought for what used to be our living room.
I just wanted to go away as I originally came to LA... Miss Savannah Davies!
When the time came for me to hand over my copy of the divorce papers and sign the agreed division of our assets. I watched as Carlos hovered over his newly printed out papers that Georgi hadn't scribbled on which once signed would more or less declare the end of our marriage.
I did at this point hope for a miracle, I wanted to climb over the table and declare my never ending love for him, beg him not to sign it but he looked up at me with what I can only describe as hate, he shook his head then signed our old life away.
Once the solicitor had gone through what happens next, I left the room.
I clicked the button on the elevator so many times in a bid to make it hurry up but Carlos had reluctantly caught up with me. He was walking at a snails pace to avoid possible lift sharing, but we both ended up stood by the lift waiting in silence.
I did momentarily consider just using the stairs but as this thought came to me the elevator doors opened.
Carlos pressed the button to go down.
The silence was Stoney. I got my phone out and went on twitter to occupy myself, I changed my name back to Davies and announced "divorced :-[" as my tweet.
"why did you just fuck me and run off in the night?" Carlos said coldly from the side of me.
"oh. fuck. off! I said almost sarcastically.
"what? I don't get it savannah? You said you wanted to try again, you said you loved me!" He replied.
"yes and I do love you and I did want to work it out but then I heard you telling that fucking little slut of yours on the phone that all you want is her, and I'm a mistake... You used me Carlos! ... You fucking used me!" I snapped.
"you've got it wrong! That's not what happened at all sav" he said.
"fuck it Carlos, I really don't want to hear it. Honestly I have gone past the point of trying to care" I lied.
Carlos then hit the emergency stop button on the elevator making it come to an abrupt stop inbetween the first and second floor.
"what the fuck? why have you done that for" I snapped trying to reach for the button, but he moved in the way of it.
"savannah just hear me out! what I said to Tammi on the phone I did not mean" he tried to explain.
"oh fuck it Carlos! what's the matter? had she dumped you too and now you've come running back to me, well sorry you can fuck off, I'm done, we are done. Divorced, finished ... The end! "I said crossing my arms over my chest.
"savannah she didn't dump me, it was already over! she was trying to kill herself! She threatened me with her life that if I didn't agree to take her back and say those things then she would slit her wrists" he said.
I looked at him for a long time, searching his brown familiar eyes for traces of the truth "I don't believe you" I finally said, trying to stop my heart from being broken for a third time.
Carlos then just stood there then got his phone out, tapped away then showed me what was loaded up. It was a news article about Tammi. Attempted suicide, she had slit her left wrist and taken almost an entire bottle of aspirin.
"I didn't believe she was actually serious and I told her to do it... She actually did it" Carlos said sadly.
"my God... She really tried to top herself?" I said looking at him then reading the rest of the article.
I didn't want to say those things to her, I'm sorry that you heard me, i went back upstairs and I just thought you had left... Changed your mind and left!" He said.
"I would never of just left... " I said now thinking back to the conversation I did over hear. It made sense now, Carlos saying to her to please stop this, I just assumed he meant crying or something, not cutting herself.
"I never would of said I wanted to take it slow and try again if I didn't mean it" he replied.
"fuck... Los! We just got divorced!" I said now realising what a big mistake we had just made.
"I know... I do love you savannah" he then said.
"I love you too Los" I said then took a step toward him and slipped my hand in his.
he kissed me gently "slow! Day at a time, okay... Lets not mess this up" he said.
"will Tammi try and kill herself again? If she finds out?" I asked not wanting a death on my hands.
"I don't know... But we don't have to tell anyone do we, it can be just us for a bit?" He said softly and gave me another gentle kiss.
"a secret romance with my ex husband sounds amazing... Plus I have the perfect secret get away for us to get to know each other in" I smiled.
"oh really! Where?" he asked.
"its a secret... Kind of" I laughed. "but I will have to go by the estate agents and say I left the other set of keys in Portland as I've lost them." I explained.
"oh is this the place your renting?" Carlos asked.
"yeah... Wanna check it out and... Get to know each other?" I giggled. "I'm back in Portland tomorrow, I promised Sean... Come with me!?"
"I will check it out... Make sure the bed is good enough for you" he smirked "sure I'll go to Portland with you miss Davies!" He smiled.
I smiled back and kissed him hitting the release on the emergency stop button as I went.