Sooo someone pointed out Jack is actually the Guardian of Fun...lol which is true! I don't know where I got the Guardian of Joy, I think I've seen a lot of other fanfic writers refer to him that way...but yeaahh, will be fixing that reference from now on. :P Probably not going to fix past references though, too lazy haha

Anyway sorry if I didn't manage to reply to your review! I wasn't quite as good as keeping up with replying this time, but I promise I read and treasure every single one of them! :) And extra thanks to those who gave me some cosplay tips. It's veerrrry slowly coming along lol...staff is almost finished! I'll probably start posting some WIP photos on deviantart.

Chapter notes: What must it be like, to have an eternity to deal with your ghosts?

Thanks to ClumsyPinkTiger for proofreading and the encouragement!

Enjoy!

Time

For a Guardian, the passage of time was very different. Immortality and the prospect of eternity tended to drastically change one's perspective on such things. For Jack, knowing he would live forever only made him live more in the present. Why plan for the rest of your life if there was no limit to it?

Of course, things didn't start out that way. He hadn't known he was immortal at first, after all. Those first few days after emerging from the ice were filled with nothing but confusion. Who was he? Why couldn't anyone see him? How was he going to survive all by himself?

He'd realized pretty quickly that he didn't need to eat. That at least, had taken away a large chunk of his worries that consisted of simply surviving. Of course, it had only added the question of what he was in addition to who.

The next revelation was that he didn't age. That one had taken several years to realize, for obvious reasons. At least that had been more of a gradual realization, so once his suspicions had been confirmed, it wasn't as much of a shock. No, it only brought forth a different kind of fear - the knowledge that he might live forever, and never know why. How could he possibly deal with an eternity of unanswered questions?

At first he'd worried about it. He was constantly reminded of it. Glimpsing his eternally young features reflected in his own ice, seeing families filled with both the young and old, watching villages and towns change over time. Everywhere he turned, his immortality was always being shoved in his face. He had truly believed at one point that he would actually go insane.

Slowly slowly, he'd learned to cope. After all, there was nothing he could really do about it. Only when he was able to push the worries, confusion, even the loneliness to the back of his mind was he able to just live and enjoy the present. He had even started to have fun, playing with any children he could find, despite his invisibility. He could forget.

He managed to settle into something of a routine. Only every few years his mind would simply break, and everything he'd pushed to the back would come rushing forth like the raging torrents of a waterfall. He'd then struggle for weeks - sulking, freezing things, yelling at the moon - before he'd manage to shove all the negative emotions back once more.

Jack stared down morosely at the lake of his birth. Recovering his memories and becoming a Guardian should have solved everything. He'd gotten his answers - he knew who he was, he knew his purpose, and he would never feel loneliness again. But instead, his old questions were only replaced by new ones. They focused on that crying girl he'd left behind, on this very lake over 300 years ago - what had happened to her after he had died? What kind of life had she lived? How badly had his death affected her?

The young Guardian sighed, turning away from the lake. He knew he would get over it eventually. Regaining his memories had made it feel as if he had lost her all over again, and he just missed his sister. So he really didn't think much of it when he fell into his usual habit of wallowing in angst every couple years or so.

In retrospect, the winter spirit should have been more careful. After all, he was basically rendering himself completely vulnerable during those few weeks of weakness, and after a few centuries, someone was bound to notice his habits. It was just unfortunate that the first to do so happened to be the Nightmare King.