I am a college graduate. Go me! The ceremony was outside it was three hours long and cold. Hope you guys are enjoying the story. For now I'm working to save money to get me a car to get a job to move out of my parent's basement and hopefully find a job in the mist that's better suited for me. Love you all!

So now what? What does this leave us? What am I suppose to do now? In the movies the moms always cry about the possibility that someone else is cooking him breakfast. Am I expected to feed him?... I cannot believe I lost my virginity in an open field somewhere in California. I can't believe Troy Bolton took my virginity. I have no regrets and I don't feel bad at all but god his silence is driving me nuts.

I have to get a grip on my life. Last night after he fell asleep and I came out of the shower I watched him sleep. I wanted so bad to be in his arms. I almost felt like I needed his touch. Just the fact that he was there not touching me was killing me. Even now in the car we're driving in silence. Isn't someone going to say something about the big thing that happened last night?

Is it awkward if I bring it up? What do I say? "Hey was it good for you?" I mean come where are the life lessons about moments that follow the moment everyone talks about? I feel so distant from him now and it so odd because last night we were the closest we could have ever been.

I'm so sore and tired. I need to do laundry at the next hotel. Do I ask to do his? What's going to happen at the next hotel? Then again I guess that circles the where are we question. … I hate my life.

Gabriella looked up at the trophy case in the student admission building. Leaning back she winced, did it have to hurt every time she moved? She'd decided to wear a brown skirt and white lace top. It was breeze and easy, simple and classic. Her hair was down over her shoulders hiding marks on her neck that were all too telling of what she'd done last night. She didn't regret. God no, it might not have been the fireworks and Mozart all the books and movies made it out to be but it was special to her.

This morning when she woke up Troy was already in the shower. She was closer to some kind of an idea about her essay. She had an idea, finding yourself when put out of your element. After filling five pages with her ramblings about every detail of Troy's ravishing nature she came to the conclusion that she hadn't been her invisible mouse like self since they left home.

Turning around she looked at the others listening to the information from the tour guide. Troy was interested, so interested that he might have even forgot she was there. She wasn't offended. The entire point of the road trip was for him to make a choice and her to see Stanford.

"You look as bored as I am."

Gabriella looked over at boy with broad shoulders and a green hooded sweatshirt on.

"I'm just set on my college choice." She said with a small smile. "I just feel odd." she said thinking about the sore aching muscles between her legs and how her wrist had faint marks. Everything about her body was in some way covered with evidence that he had been there.

"I never actually pictured myself going to college." He said turning himself more towards her.

"I never pictured anything less." Gabriella said with a shrug. "It's always just been the next thing for me."

The boy chuckled and then looked back up at her. "What's your poison?" He asked.

"Teaching." She said crossing her arms. Even her shoulders were sore. "Literature."

"Nice." He said with a laugh. "I'm more of a bio-chemistry guy."

"What are you going to do with that?" Gabriella said tilting her head to the right.

"Would it impress you if I said cure cancer?" he responded.

"It's a bit over used." She smiled. "but a good cause nonetheless."

"Tommy Mitchell." He said extending a hand.

"Gabriella Montez" she took his hand politely and tucked her hair behind her ear.

"That's very suited." he said placing his hands into his pockets. "Pretty girls always have pretty names."

Gabriella blushed and then looked over at Troy who was no longer lost in the tour but staring directly at her. The shock of his smoky blue eyes staring directly into her brown made the smile disappear on her lips. Turning back to Tommy he looked over at Troy.

"Boyfriend?"

"No." she answered honestly.

"Brother then?" he said a bit more hopeful.

"No." what was she suppose to call him. "It's complicated." She settled looking back at Troy who had turned away from her.

Troy looked off into the distance beyond the tour guide who was talking about the history of the current building they were standing in. it seemed like all these tours were the same. No one ever told you anything useful. It always seemed to be about something he could have just looked up online. I guess being in the actual campus walking through actual hall invoked a motivation in him but it wasn't anything bind blowing. The only thing mind blowing about the entire trip was a certain petite brunette who made him double take when she appeared from the washroom in that short brown skirt and lace top.

Her hair was wild and he felt the need to touch it. To twirl her curls around his fingers and just feel how soft and touchable they were. Just the sight of her lacing up her tennis shoes this morning made him hard. Something about her modesty the way she just was without trying. Her confidence, it was sexy. Troy stole another glance as she tucked a strain of hair behind her ear. When they were in the car with the windows down the wind had blown her hair in all directions revealing two noticeable marks on her neck. As of right now that was the only proof he had that last night even happened at all.

When he woke up she was snuggled in her bed fast asleep. He was a bit disappointed that she didn't crawl into bed with him. That she preferred to be so distant after something so intimate. Now she was talking to a guy over there and he could swear it was like all her relations to him were gone.

When their eyes meant a second time he offered her a smile. He remember after him and Sharpay had sex for the first time she called him almost every ten minutes to just check in. For a while there was a time where she wasn't happy unless in some form in some way she was touching him. He should have known then from his discomfort that she wasn't the right one.

The group started to move up the stairs, Gabriella walking alongside her new friend. He'd give anything to be holding her hand right now. Anything just so he could have a reason to touch her.

After the tour Gabriella was sat on hood of his truck as she waited for him to finish up with one of the admission counselors. They had to talk about it at some point. She had to prove that this wasn't just in her head and last night had happened.

Troy slowly came up to the car with a packet in his arms. "Ready to head back?"

"No." Gabriella leaded forward and looked down at the grass. "But, we don't have a choice do we?"

"I'm going to take page from your book, and just say what's on my mind here," he said looking down at the ground then back up at her. "I really want to touch you."

"I want to touch you too." Gabriella looked down at him from where she sat on the hood of the truck. She bit her lip and pondered the silence between them as she urged herself to say something. "Why haven't you?"

"I don't know."

"Then do something about it."

Troy smirked and lifted a hand to lift her hair over her shoulder. "How are you feeling?"

Gabriella let out a sigh of relief. "I feel sore."

"That's expected." He said looking down at her lips. "but, I meant your neck, I didn't hurt you did I?" He shouldn't have left a mark on her. Even though it was nice to see his mark on her, but when they got home people were going to talk. Sharpay was going to know and he wasn't going to drag Gabriella's name through the mud.

Gabriella shook her head. "It short of tickled."

Troy nodded and the playfully slapped her knee with the packet. "I know a trick that'll get rid of the marks," He said indicating the evidence he left on her neck. "It'll be like nothing happened."

"Why?" she said in low voice.

Troy reached for the handle of the truck and stopped. "Because it isn't something people like to see Gabi." He said in calm voice.

"People like Sharpay."

Troy tossed the packet stuff in the back. "Yes and then there are others." He said coming around to her. When Troy held up his hand to help her down she didn't take it.

Jumping down on her own she turned away from him.

"Wait, wait,wait." He said pulling on her arm.

"What?" Gabriella looked away, she looked up, sideways, everywhere but at him.

"Look at me," he said lifting her chin. When she didn't he repeated himself. "Look at me."

Gabriella eyes settled on his and she felt herself blink back a tear. He wanted to hide her, he wanted to act as if nothing happened, he wanted her to go away.

"You go home like that and it's going to spread like wildfire, people will jump to conclusion and they're going to turn it into something nasty," He said with a low voice. "I love you, and I meant what I said when I said I'd never set out to hurt you."

"Saying something has nothing to do with meaning it." Gabriella pulled away from his arms. "Actions speak louder than words."

"Gabriella, you have to give me a chance to break this with Sharpay."

"And when will that be Troy?" she said crossing her arms. "When we get back? a week from then? A month?"

"When I can," he said in a frustrated tone. "You don't understand it'd hard to talk to her."

"Then don't bother." Gabriella walked over to her door and pulled it open.

"What about you and that Jason thing…" Troy went around and caught the door before she closed it. "Are you going to tell me your just over him now?" His heart was pounded against his ribcage. He didn't know what he was looking for. Bullshit, he knew what he wanted to hear. He wanted her to tell him that every damn page in that notebook was something about him and not some other guy.

"God you're so stupid." She said getting out of the truck and taking a step towards him as he took one back. "For the last four years I've done nothing but write about you Troy!" she said ranking her finger through her hair in frustration. "Like a little sick puppy I've sat outside my bedroom watching you work on that stupid truck and spending every night thinking about what it must be like to be with Troy Bolton." Gabriella had a tear in her eye that over flowed and escaped. "I thought I was just some pathetic moron with a school girl crush on this amazing boy next door. But it turns out the boy next store is nothing but a pathetic moron who I put on this untouchable pedestal." Gabriella shoved him and Troy stumbled back. "Your nothing but dumb high school jock and that's all your ever going to be because you don't know how care about people, yourself, or going after anything you actually want out of life unless someone tells you to."

Troy was silent as she began to cry. He felt horrible. Coming towards her he extended his arms to wrap around her and she used her fist to beat his chest.

"I hate you." she shoved away from him and beat his chest as he pulled her to him. "You kissed me, you touched me, you… you didn't even care that I slept alone or how I felt," she mumbled into his shirt. "You just wanted to feel something and you used me. I hate you."

The last part was mumbled into his chest as he held her tightly. A tear rolled down his own face and he pulled her closer trying to soothe her crying but she wasn't going to stop.

"I hate you so much."

Troy nodded and brushed her hair as he held her. It was all he could do because he had nothing to say and every word she said was a pin needle in his heart.