Chapter 21: Confession

Conan hadn't expected to find Ran in perfect shape when he came back from his visit to Hakase. After all, the whole reason why he went was to lure Ran out, assuming she would try to fix the thing that bothered her gravely. However, when the camera, he placed in the bush next to the stairs leading up to the agency, didn't show anybody on the screen till midnight, he became suspicious and, trusting in his detective instincts, he rushed back.

When he entered the office, he couldn't spot anything at first, besides the flickering off the television, but when he made his way over, wondering why Ran hadn't turned it off, a soft groan reached his ears. Turning his head to look at the noise's source, he spotted Ran lying on the couch, cheeks pale, sweat running down her face and tossing restlessly.

The initial shock of seeing his childhood friend like this was quickly replaced with a flood of worry. This was clearly no ordinary nightmare, so he dashed to her side, shacking her shoulders slightly, but then Ran suddenly started to mutter apologies and the fact that she addressed them to Shinichi didn't make it any better.

"Hey Ran, wake up! Ran!" Conan started to call out to her, not caring for dropping the honorific, "RAN! RAN!"

The fear made his shouts go louder and louder, while he started to grip and shake her more forceful, but all his efforts were only answered with Ran struggling to shake his grip off. However, in his desperate state he wasn't willing to let go and only started to increase his effort to wake her up and finally she stopped to trash around and her eyes slowly opened.

"Ran?", the little boy exclaimed, relief flooding his mind, just happy that his friend woke up.

"Conan-kun?" Ran whispered faintly, still dazzled from her dream and Conan quickly slide his childish mask back on.

"Ran-neechan? Are you ok, does it hurt?", he asked, expecting her to smile and assure him that it was only a bad dream, but when Ran suddenly backed away from him, eyes widened in horror, he was taken aback.

"Ran-neechan?", he asked again, completely clueless of what caused her withdrawal, and hearing how she started to sob only added to his confusion.

"Conan-kun", Ran faintly cried out, "I'm so sorry! I didn't want to… I.. I" she started to stutter, "I don't know what happen…when I woke up everybody just told me what…oh god… what have I…how could I…can you forgive me?", she finally blurted out in a pleading voice.

"What are you talking about?" was the only thing could utter back, now completely lost in her words and actions.

"You know, the assa… I mean the mole…", she started again, not able to speak out the words and then something inside of her seemed to break. Suddenly she threw herself on his tiny shoulder crying out everything she tried to suppress. Her tears and words started to flow out, drenching Conan's shirt and flooding his ears.

"I have assaulted you!", she cried out, slowly confessing everything she tried to keep in to him.

"I tried to keep it in because it is crazy," her mouth just babbled, only stopping to take a breath, "but whenever I saw you speak to other girls or when you were gone or when something upset you, I just couldn't keep it in."

Her voice grew louder and louder, ranting on about all her jealousy, envy and other feelings she had, only to end with the one sentence, "I LOVE YOU, CONAN!"

It was hard to even understand everything she said, but actually processing it was just impossible for Conan. So, still digesting everything she had said, he mindlessly answered, "I love you too, Ran-neechan.", but immediately regretted those foolish words, after the came over his lips.

At first Ran only stared at him, emotions fluttering over her face as quickly as a flock of birds, but then it ended in a mix of disappointment and loneliness.

"Of course, you don't even understand" she whispered, her voice filled with the dread and pain of months, "I'm sorry Conan-kun.", she started to sob again, lifting herself up from the couch, "But you can't… stay… here.", she finally muttered, nearly chocking at the last words, before she turned around and rushed to the door.

Conan, who now finally understood what was actually happening, knew that he could not let her go, not now, not after everything she had confessed to him.

"RAN-NEECHAN!", he screamed, chasing right after her, up the stairs and to her room. But because of his short legs, she managed to lock the door before he could squeeze himself through the brief opening.

"RAN-NEECHAN!" he screamed while slamming his fists against the wood, "PLEASE OPEN THE DOOR!"

"No, Conan-kun", he could hear Ran's faint reply through the sturdy wood, "I'm dangerous. If I stay next to you, I could hurt you."

"No you won't" he screamed back, determined to not fuck up, at least this time, "You are strong, I know that and I trust you." He tried to comfort her, intentionally dropping his Conan-mask and using his old speech patterns. This was not the time to care about some silly organisation or some stupid poison. Right now, all that mattered was to bring his friend back, at all costs.

But in her despair, Ran's mind was too clouded to notice the change in his way of speaking, "How could you trust me, when I don't even trust myself" she asked bitterly.

"I'm a pedophile, Conan-kun" she now screamed, finally admitting the horrible truth, "I tried to disprove this fact for month, but in the end, I could only prove how desperate and crazy I was. Even considering the possibility of you being Shinchi, as if people would suddenly shrink."

"But that is the truth!" Shinichi, shoot back, knowing fully well that this was the only way to save his friend, "You are neither a pedophile, nor are you crazy!"

"STOP IT CONAN!" Ran shriek, not willing to hear these lies, "Why can't you just accept what I am?"

"How could I accept something wrong? Ran! You know I, SHINICHI KUDO, would never trade the truth for convenience!"

This sentence was enough to overwhelm Ran.

These were the words.

The words she wanted to hear in her nightmare.

The words only her best friend could voice.

And despite all the doubt and impossibility she faced, she wanted to trust the voice.

Find truth and honesty in it, like Shinichi had always given her.

Slowly she reached for the the key and turned it, to unlock the door, but only when she pulled the door open, Conan would enter her room.

Holding his glasses in his right hand, looking up at her not with the usual childish look, but with a reassuring grin.

"Thank you", he voiced faintly, relief filling his features, showing Ran clearly how much, he cared.

"Aren't you afraid of me?" Ran asked, still sniffling a little, and Conan answered with a weak smile, "How could I ever truly fear you?"

The small gesture pleased Ran and reminded her too that despite all her words and actions, she would never be able to truly hurt her friends. And just knowing this comforted her more than anything and proved her again the invalidity of her nightmare.

Following Conan to sit beside him on her bed, she enjoyed the silence of them just siting there.

"So, you said you are Shinichi?", Ran finally broke the silence, "Care to explain how this could happen?"

And Conan started his narration.

As always all right go to Gosho Aoyama, the original creator of the Detective Conan Universe.

Questions and review are highly requested and if you want to know how the story continues leave a follow.

I hope you liked it so far and are thrilled for more.

Farewell