Story I – Chapter 21
After relaxing with the kids for the rest of the evening, Hotch went up with Joey to read to her like he usually did when he was home. As he patiently waited for her to get her pajamas on and her teeth brushed, he browsed her bookshelf trying to figure out which book to read. Being slightly OCD like her mother, Joey had all of her books organized by genre and he sighed when his hand reached the horror section. He chuckled to himself when he saw Bram Stoker's 'Dracula', though. I guess that will make explaining all of this to her a little easier when the time comes.
He shook his head and then smiled when he saw an old favorite on another shelf. His finger caught the top of the frayed binding of a faded purple, hard cover book and he pulled Ronal Dahl's 'Charlie and the Chocolate Factory' out. Jack had given it to his sister as soon as she started reading and Hotch's mind traveled back in time to a much younger Jack.
He was pulled from his thoughts as he heard Joey shut the water off and open her bathroom door. She smiled up at him and then frowned. "You ok, Daddy?"
He chuckled and then showed her the book. "Yes, Angel. I was just thinking about when Jack and I read this."
She took the book and then smiled when she realized which one it was. "Jack used to read this to me."
He picked her up and carried her to her bed and sat her down beside her cat. "So you don't mind if I read from it tonight?"
She shook her head as she crawled under her covers and then grabbed Muffin and laid her on her chest.
Once she was settled, he sat down beside her and opened the book. At least some things haven't changed yet.
XXX
Once Joey was asleep, Hotch made his way down stairs and told the boys goodnight and then made his way to the family room. He sighed as he flopped down onto the couch next to his wife, and she reached over and took his hand and gave it a squeeze. "You ok?"
He took a deep breath and nodded. "I think so."
"I'm sorry I said those things on the jet. I didn't mean to throw all that on you like that."
He shook his head. "It's alright. I know you've been thinking about all of this more than I have."
She wrapped her arm around him and pulled him closer. "I know this is a lot to deal with and there are a thousand other things that we need to think about and discuss, but I want you to keep one thing in the front of your mind."
He turned to her. "And what's that."
She smiled and leaned into his shoulder. "That you don't have to face any of this alone, Aaron. I am with you every step of the way."
He smiled and leaned into her. "I know, and I love you for it."
After a few moments, he sat back up and then looked at her. "But you were wrong about one thing."
She frowned as she looked at him. "And what's that?"
He licked his lips and turned to her more directly and took her hands in his. "Had I been given the choice about all this before it happened and I knew everything it was going to entail, I still would have chosen it. I will do anything I have to in order to stay with you and the kids."
She smiled and leaned in and gave him a quick kiss. "Thank you."
He pulled her to him and held her close. "I just hope you all don't come to hate me for everything this will put you all through."
She pulled back from him so quickly that his brows rose in shock and she shook her head in anger. "Hate you? We could never hate you, Aaron!" She sighed and tried to calm back down. "You are the one going through this, Hun, and we will support you in every way we can."
He shook his head. "But you were right. Eventually everything will change and because of me, you all will have to face those changes, too." She went to open her mouth to argue, but he scooted closer to her. "When it gets to the point of us having to move to protect my secret. . ." He shook his head again. "This house is the only home Joey has ever known, and she's going to have to leave it because of me. Everyone the kids are connected to. . . your family. . ." He dropped his head into his hands and shook it some more. "I'm so sorry."
She sighed as she shook her head slowly and then put a hand on his back. "Look at me, Aaron." He took a shuddering breath and she started rubbing circles on his back to try and get him to calm down. "Aaron?"
He sniffed, wiped his face, and then sat up and looked at her and her heart ached to see him so full of guilt.
She inhaled through her nose as she reached out and caught a stray tear as it fell down his cheek. "How long did I say I thought you had before we had to worry about that?"
His brows furrowed because he wasn't sure where she was going with that. "You said maybe ten years."
She nodded. "Maybe ten years if we're careful."
He nodded, but he still wasn't following her.
"And Joe will be done with school by then, correct?" He frowned even more but he nodded in agreement. "So who's to say we don't go somewhere where she can go to a really good college. Hell, we could even move overseas and she could go to Oxford or something." He relaxed a little as his eyes darted around as he considered her words. "And the boys will be starting their careers by then." She reached out and cupped his cheek and turned him to her. "You won't have to worry about disrupting their lives because they will be starting their own, Hun."
He smiled slightly. "You really have thought all of this through, huh?" She shrugged, but then he frowned again. "But what about you leaving your family, us having to leave everyone we know. That's not fair to make you. . ."
"How about we worry about the immediate future only for the time being so we can all get adjusted to this a little better?"
He sighed and then nodded slowly. "Alright."
She grabbed his hand and tugged on it until he looked at her. "I will do anything I need to do to stay with you, Aaron, just like you would do for me."
He searched her eyes. "What would I do without you?"
She quirked her mouth as she thought about it. "You'd be lost, just like I would be without you," she told him with a big grin.
He chuckled. "I love you."
She giggled and pulled him to her chest. "And I love you."
After a few moments, she pushed him away, stood up, and pulled on his arm. "Now come on. You need to know where your stuff is."
He frowned for a moment and then it hit him she was talking about his supply of blood. He mentally sighed and followed her out into the garage. He chuckled when she pointed to the little fridge set back in the corner. They only used the fridge a few times for big parties and he had actually forgotten about it. He shook his head. "Well, at least it's not in the house."
She sighed. "It was the only place to put it."
He nodded. "I know. I just hope no one ever opens it."
She sighed. "No one is going to open it, Aaron," she assured him and started back towards the kitchen door. "But we need to figure out what you are going to do about work."
"Work?"
She turned to him as he shut the garage door and locked it. "You are going to need to take some with you, Hun. You need to have it in case you get a case and have to leave."
He frowned; he hadn't thought about that either. "I guess I could borrow one of the boys' lunchboxes and put it in my go-bag until I figure out how to handle it."
She giggled as she imagined the prim and proper, suit wearing, SSA Hotchner carrying a soft-sided, bright colored, lunchbox, but she nodded. "That'll work." He shook his head and she giggled even more. "You could use Jack's old one with the dinosaurs on it."
He huffed. "Shut up, Kahlan."
She laughed and then went to him and put her hands around the back of his neck and looked up into his eyes. "You know, you could take off a few days to give yourself some time to adjust."
He shook his head. "No. I need to work."
She searched his eyes and knew he needed to prove to himself that he still could, so she smiled. "Then we better get to bed."
XXX
The next morning, Hotch made his way in from the parking garage slowly and as the elevator door opened on his floor, his ears were assaulted. He cringed. He had thought that he was early enough that he would get there before too many people, but he could clearly hear several different people talking and doing things. He took a deep breath and proceeded to his office.
By the time the team had started to arrive, Hotch had figured out how to ignore most of what he heard, but then he heard a familiar heart beat approaching and he smiled as he waited for Rossi to show up at his door.
Rossi gave him a shocked look. "Expecting me?"
Hotch chuckled. "I heard you coming."
Rossi nodded as he made his way to this seat. "So, how did last night go?"
Hotch nodded. "Alright."
"And this morning?" he asked as he gestured to the bullpen.
Hotch took a deep breath and sat back. "I can't believe the amount of gossiping everyone does."
Rossi laughed. "Thank God Kitten can't hear as well as you."
Hotch nodded and then sighed.
"So are you ready for a case or hoping we don't get one?"
"I'm not sure."
Rossi nodded knowingly. He figured Hotch wanted to get a case to see how he would do but was also worried about how he would handle it. "You know you are going to be fine, Aaron."
Hotch shrugged. "That's what I keep telling myself."
Rossi sat forward and lowered his voice. "Are you prepared if we do?"
"Yes, Dave."
He smiled. "I figured, but I just wanted to make sure." He stood up. "I need some coffee. You need any?"
Hotch shook his head and grabbed another file off the stack in his in-box. "No thank you."
Rossi took a deep breath and then went the break room as he pulled out his phone. He had planned on talking to each of the team members individually but after hearing how Hotch could hear everything in the bullpen, he knew it was better to use other lines of communication so he sent a text to the team. 'This new development is off limits unless he brings it up first.' He chose his words carefully in case someone else accidently saw the text, but he knew the team would understand.
His eyes met with Reid's as soon as the message was sent. Reid frowned and then took out his phone and then nodded. Rossi's eyes found JJ and Mack next and they also agreed and Morgan and Garcia sent back their agreements as Rossi made his way to the coffee pot. Now we just need a case that isn't too bad.
XXX
When nine o'clock rolled around, Hotch met everyone in the conference room. Dayton, Ohio wanted their help finding a serial rapist. Rossi smiled to himself. Nice. No bloody crime scenes for Hotch to worry about. After the presentation, Hotch stood up. "Wheels up in thirty," he issued and then left. He had seen all of the little glances his team kept sending his way. He knew they were worried about him, but he figured the best way to ease their fears was by doing what he knew best, being the Unit Chief.
Morgan stood up as they all watched him leave. "He seems fine."
"Well of course he does," Garcia offered with a smile.
Rossi nodded. "Yep."