Two chapters to make up for my absence. I realized, when I write about Patch- I've unconsciously given him terrible PTSD. It fits, considering all of the things he's gone through and all of the stress and weight he has to deal with, but it was never my real intention to give him exactly PTSD. Hell I struggle with the weight of school plus extra-curriculars; I can't imagine dealing with the fates of the world and shit lol.

Also, side note- the dreams that Patch has are of different memories that are supposed to flow together because...dreams. It's hard to convey that so I'm sorry!

Chapter Nineteen

Patch's POV

Face bashfully red, Nora stopped me from kissing her again.

"Enough," she said, chuckling.

"When it comes to you, I don't know what that means. You'll have to explain." I said, moving her hands. She jerked them back.

"Patch!" she cried, getting that cute frustrated look on her face. It was the first time she'd called me Patch since she'd vanished. I'd missed her hearing the name come from her lips. Her puffy, incredible-looking…

I leaned back in, and she crossed her arms.

"I won't let you hold me for the next three months if you don't stop."

I wished her luck stopping me, but I leaned back and put my hands up. "You run a hard bargain, Angel. I'm being coerced to accept. I'm just saying, we could do so much if we just made about fifteen steps into the bedroom…"

"No."

She looked so smug, and…You're so cute!

I missed you so much.

I didn't know it was possible to feel so complete. I knew that real life waited outside of these walls, but inside them it was just me and her. It felt so right. I nuzzled her nose, making her laugh, then I placed my head on her shoulders and began playing with her hair. She yawned.

"Tired?"

"Yeah." She yawned again. "I know I'll need to drive home. I don't know if I'll make it. Maybe you could drop me off?"

"Yeah, I can do that. Just give me a little more time with you first."

She blushed, and then her eyes closed. "Let me know when you're ready."

"You could always stay here tonight anyway, though. We don't have to do anything."

No answer.

Soon she was snoring quietly, like a purr. I wasn't going to be ready to let her go tonight. I untangled myself from her, and lifted her up, carrying her into my bedroom. I hoped that she had better dreams in there than I had ever had.

Her eyes fluttered as I lay her down into my rarely-used bed. The sheets were silk, told to be very comfortable- but I wouldn't know. Her body sank into it, and even unconsciously her face was blissful, so it must have been nice. Only the best for her.

I walked out of the room, only to call Vee and to let her know that she needed to vouch for Nora's whereabouts. She proceeded to try to curse me out, but with some…persuasion, she conceded. I went back into the room and sat down in a chair next to the bed.

She looked like a fallen goddess. She was laying on her back, so her red hair was strewn across the black pillows. The contrast of both of the colors, combined with her skin, was majestic and tragic. Like something from a Renaissance painting. The darkness added to the image of her laying, as if in a wake. I envisioned a concrete slab in the middle of a great hall, with the black silk sheets, and Nora laying on it. The death of something beautiful. My heart dropped. That was my biggest fear this past summer. Finding out that she had died, that I had failed. Having to find her body and watch as she was laid to rest next to her father. I watched, waiting thankfully every time her chest rose and fell.

Sleeping, Nora looked so peaceful. I went over to sit on the bed. So calm, quiet, and unbothered. I slowly leaned down next to her, until I was lying face to face with her. A deep sleeper too, like a rock. She didn't even move. I smiled, and began stroking her cheek. She smiled, but still didn't wake up. I could imagine how warm she was. She smelled really nice too. Like jasmine and vanilla. I closed my eyes. I understood that this was probably as close as I should move, both out of the respect I was supposed to have and because she might wake up. I wanted to do this every night. It would be perfect. We could just avoid all of the problems by staying down here.

Yep. I'm okay with that.

I saw Chauncey slowly moving towards Nora, and Nora was clinging onto a ladder. I needed to get to her…I needed to grab her and get her out of here…

"Help!" Her scream was filled with so much anguish that I could have cried. I couldn't move, but Angel needed me. I'm coming…I'm coming! What can I do…

"No…No!"

The guttural scream escaped me as soon as she fell. I finally regained control of my body, but it was too late. I'd watched, frozen in shock and horror, as her body cracked against the gym floor.

"Nora!" I raced forward, falling on my knees and picking her up. I vaguely noticed Chauncey's body make impact near the floor.

Her body was contorted from the impact, and her neck was bent. She was becoming paler as her life left her. I leaned over her body, helpless.

"It's all right, it's going to be okay…" I murmured frantically as I tried to calm down. "Nora…Nora…"

My voice was plaintive as I shook her. "Nora…it's okay…you're going to be okay…" I held her head closer to mine, trying to hear for breathing. I heard a little, but it was small and fading. "The paramedics, they'll get here, we can get you help…" I looked up, and her head lolled back with a sigh.

The only way I could describe it was like my soul shriveling. I felt completely empty.

It was over. Chauncey won. She was gone. Nora was gone. My Angel was gone.

I'd failed her.

"Aghhhhhhhh!" I threw my head back…

I woke up, shaken by the emotions. I hadn't thought of Chauncey, or what had happened in the spring, for a long time. She had died. I'd only dealt with it for all of five minutes and it was some of the worst pain I'd ever felt. It had somehow been so overshadowed by all of what had followed. I tried to shake it off and went back to sleep.

"You kissed Marcie." The words came out, but they were dead. There was no anger, no sadness, nothing. Her eyes filled with tears, and she bit her lip. I ran my hand down my face and squeezed the bridge of my nose, trying to hide the shame.

"Tell me it's a mind game. Tell me it's a trick. Tell me that she has some kind of power over you, that you don't have any choice when it comes to being with her." She asked me, the last of her hope in the questions. If I could have answered 'yes' to any of them, I could have saved her.

"It's complicated." I came here to talk, and I hadn't bothered to get to the point. Now it was too late.

"No." she gasped, shaking her head. "Don't tell me it's complicated. Nothing is complicated anymore-not after everything we've been through. What do you even hope to get out of a relationship with her?"

I caught her eye, begging her to understand. "Not love." Never, not from her.

I watched her sag with defeat. Her entire body crumbled, like she couldn't keep herself steady anymore. Her fingers curled, and she looked down at them, before looking back at me hatefully.

"You make me sick." She growled….

The Nephil tied a blindfold over her face, and threw her over his shoulder. She began to scream in a panic.

"Don't let them take me! Patch NO!" she screamed, squirming in the Nephil's arms.

I gasped when I saw her face. One black eye; the other bloodshot. Bruising all around her skull, welts on her cheeks, both from handprints and from something else. Welts, running down her arms, down her back, and probably into her legs. Dried blood on her lips. I began to shake, and angry tears threatened to run down my face.

I woke up again, breathing heavily. This was why I didn't sleep. My guilt and stress tended to slip into my dreams, making it harder and harder for me to have any type of respite against a world that was determined to show me how much of a fuck-up I was.

Nora was asleep next to me, although she'd rolled on to her stomach. Her face was even closer to me now, and I looked at her. Sometimes I wished I'd been able to lose my memories along with her. We could have both started clean. How pathetic. She deserved better.

I sighed and got up from the bed. I didn't want to disturb her with my own problems. I walked into the bathroom to shower, and as I began running the water my phone rang.

Dabria.

Ugh.

"Yes?" I answered.

"Well, that's no way to greet your partner in crime, now is it?" she purred.

"What actually do you want? It's late."

I could hear her surprise. "Late? Coming from the guy who doesn't sleep and patrols the streets like Batman?"

I was becoming more annoyed by the moment. "If there's nothing you want, I'm hanging up. Don't call me to chit chat."

"Fine. You weren't always so boring."

I couldn't help but chuckle. "Are you sure?" I could hardly remember my earliest days but they were empty compared to the life I led since I'd fallen.

She sounded pleased with my laugh. "Well. Hank Millar and his minions will be coming to me for a visit at some point. Their friendly neighborhood psychic. I can't see too much of what is going to happen, but what I can see is that he is- incredibly concerned. It's the most concerned I've ever actually seen him. Which is nice, because the arrogant Nephil—"she stopped to collect herself. "Well, anyway. I'm not sure if your plans have changed. But know that things are coming to a crossroads, so you may want to make sure you're on the right side of it all."

I took in her information. Hank Millar, concerned. It would be a first, especially because he never wiped that arrogant mug off of his face for anything. He thought he was on top of the world. Whatever was going to happen, I needed to make sure I was the reason for it.

"Noted. A free reading? What is this?" She never told me anything without gouging me for cash. "What do you want?" I suppose I could ask, since she'd been so kind.

"What are you willing to give me?" she teased.

"Nothing if you don't tell me what it is you want. I'm okay with taking free information. I'm being nice by not hanging up the phone." My bathroom was getting steamy, and while I couldn't feel it, I certainly didn't want to be in there on the phone, thinking of Dabria.

"You certainly aren't feeling playful tonight at all." I never feel playful with you. "Let's see. Since I didn't tell you very much, I'll be generous and only ask for $3,000. I'm planning on getting myself some new clothes, and I love donations."

Nothing she ever said was worth the amount she made me pay for it. Especially when she hadn't actually told me anything other than "look out". It was honestly why I never bought into her whole "psychic shop" shtick that she was pulling on pitiful humans. She was authentic, yes, but frankly nothing humans really did was worth finding out for her prices.

"$1,500."

"$2,500."

"$1,500 is my final offer or you get nothing."

She sighed exasperatedly. "You know, I'm always so kind to you! I was being generous! I do my best, and I swear that—"

"Your money will be wired to you. Have a wonderful night, Dabria."

I snickered as I heard her happy gasp at my 'nice statement' before I hung up. Before she could call back, I turned the phone off and stepped into the shower.

I began to think of my options, letting my mind reach its own conclusions and ideas. Somebody releasing the trapped archangel was a stretch, but I had a feeling that that wasn't Hank's concern. She had clipped wings, and no necklace. She was useless without either of those things, especially when Hank was experimenting on her with whatever craft he was creating. So I doubted that that had happened.

His mortality was next. Mortality was becoming more of shaky term by the day. The only way I could see Hank dying was if he'd broken his promise and…killed Nora. I became immediately defensive. I wouldn't allow that to happen. However, his mortality was the only thing Hank feared to lose. He was no longer sworn to fealty, so I doubted that he'd lost his freedom again. I'd have to do more looking.

My instinct kept leaning back to the archangel. It had to involve her. The archangels themselves. Hank was playing a dangerous game with Heaven… These were questions that needed answers. I might need to wait until Dabria had her meeting with him. Ironically enough, I felt kind of sheepish that I'd brushed her off. Still, she'd come back. She always did.

Drying off, I walked back into my bedroom. Nora was still there, still sleeping with that same purr of a snore. Feeling a little naughty, I changed clothes right in front of her. She didn't move a muscle. I felt like a teenage human boy. No purpose beyond being childish. Still, feeling like I'd done enough, I sat back in the chair next to the bed. Finally, she inhaled, exhaled, gasped— and fell back asleep. I laughed. I wouldn't be going back to sleep, and the world was admittedly still outside. At least she got a chance to rest, and I was going to make sure it was unbothered.

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