Chapter 21

'To find fault is easy, to do better may be difficult'

Plutarch

The silence thrummed throughout the wagon, hot and heavy in the stifling chamber. Ashir kept his face down, his arms outstretched as he offered his sword to the naked man before him. Edmund observed the fine tremors in the older man's arms as he fought to keep them steady, but Ashir said nothing more and waited for the king's command.

Edmund knew the man before him would not speak, would not move until he said something, but he was curious as to how far he could push him. He walked in a circle around the kneeling man observing him, unembarrassed of his nakedness.

He could stay silent no longer. "Why?" he burst out.

At last Ashir raised his head "may I tell you a story sire?" His cryptic smile fixed upon his face.

Edmund flung himself on top of a chest in the wagon and crossed one leg over the the other, elegantly waving his hand at Ashir at continue, looking for all the world if he was at a garden party at Cair Paravel. Not unclothed in a dusty wagon, whilst his sister slept at his feet, and a strange man from a strange land had presented him with his sword.

Standing up, Ashir made his way over to where Edmund was sat and pulled a stool to sit opposite him.

"A small ignorant boy knows nothing of the matters of the world. Thinks only of his belly, has he had enough to eat? How can he trick his mama into giving him more food?"

"Is this going to be a long story?" interrupted Edmund, "I do hope not. Long stories for their own sake bore me".

Ashir smiled "It is my story sire, and I can tell it no other way".

Edmund sighed and signaled for him to continue. Though his apparent languidness gave the impression of an impatient indolent aristocrat, he was quietly marking the routes out of the wagon, listening for sounds of movement outside and noting the location of his weapons.

"A small idle boy occupies himself with adventures, he travels beyond the borders of his village, to the river at the edge of the brush. It is said demons live there, that to enter you must give something of yourself. But it is also said great treasures lie in the scrub for the man who is brave enough to take them. I was not a man, but a wilful child. Spoiled and neglected in equal measure. I thought myself braver and cleverer than all those who had come before me. I entered the forbidden ground, and what do you think I found sire?"

Edmund shrugged one shoulder impatiently, his eyes on his slumbering sister, rosy and angelic still in hushed sleep.

"He was waiting for me". Ashir paused and looked at Edmund for once his face grave.

"Him?"

"You know who he is sire".

Edmund drew in a breath "describe him to me" he said sharply.

Ashir gave a chuckle "how does one describe a god? Foolish. One had better try and describe the colour of air, the sound of music played. You cannot describe what is impossible. I tell you I saw him, but I did not see him, I knew him. And he knew me. He 'appeared' shall we say when I had found the tall spider tree in the middle of the brush, looming above the rest of his neighbours, I knew the tree to be, how do you say?...magic"

Edmund gave an imperceptible snort at Ashir's supposed fumbling use of language. The man was entirely fluent in English Edmund knew. Though he might try to hide his roots, to portray his background as that of a poor boy from a tiny village in Calormen in the middle of no-where, Edmund recognised a man born and trained for war. Taught from a young age skills a commander might need for battle, and for diplomacy…

"I climbed the tree to the very top, you know of course, how young boys like to climb trees. And what do you suppose I found?"

Ashir continued his story when it became apparent Edmund would not say reply, "I saw the land before me as my father and his worked on all their lives all the way back to the start of man. A dusty yellow land, reaching far and wide. But there shimmering in the distance was verdant green, a colour I had never seen before. It spoke of life, the creation of life, and I vowed as a child to find that green land at once. I began to climb down the tree in great excitement eager to begin my quest, when my foot caught on a branch, I am not sure, but I began to fall. Tumbling down, hitting branches on the way. I was still a long way up, and if I could have thought what was to happen next - if I had not been so consumed with pair and terror - I would have thought myself about to die. But I did not, as you see before you. When I awoke, I was on the ground but not. Cradled hovering above the earth in light. And I felt it then, I felt him then. He did not speak to me that time."

Almost without noticing Edmund had sat forward leaning towards Ashir unwilling to miss any of his story.

"Eventually the light disappeared and I ran out of the brush faster than I have ever run before. Lucky to be alive, thinking no more of the green land. But a boy's memory is short and his thirst for knowledge grows. Within a week I was back in the brush, exploring, looking for the light, the man. And I found him King Edmund".

Ashir sat back with a delighted smile, noting Edmund had dropped the lazy façade and was sat upright on the chest, alert as a greyhound, his eyes fixed upon the man before him; a muscle ticked in his jaw.

"Continue" he said abruptly.

"I felt his presence as soon as I entered the brush, he was behind me, surrounding me. He did not speak but I felt him watch me. Not in a sinister way you understand, more as a friend. He wanted me to know that he was there with me. I reached the spider tree again and sat myself at the foot of it. I laid out the sweetmeats and wine I had stolen from my mother's kitchen on a blanket on the dirt, and I waited for him. For hours I sat and I did not speak. It was perhaps the longest time I had been still, I was, and still am, very impatient. As the darkness began to settle I knew my mother would be calling me soon, so I reluctantly gathered the food and made to leave, when a lamb stepped out of the bushes towards me. But not like any lamb I had ever seen before, it's wool was of the purest white, iridescent in the dusk, it's eyes large and gentle, and it smiled at me. 'Welcome child' it said, it's voice going through me, thrilling every nerve in my body".

Ashir paused to take a sip of water from the pouch.

"You do not ask of course, how an animal may speak…I have heard tales of the talking animals that frequent your lands…but for us, our animals have no voice, no thoughts; I was astonished, frightened. Although I felt the lamb's kindness towards me, his love for me. I threw myself at his feet and bowed before him, as I would prostate myself before statues of Lord Tash in our temples. But he bid me rise and sit with him. And as the darkness fell, and fireflies lit the air around us he spoke to me of a world beyond my simple village, of adventures sought and people waiting to be helped, by me. He asked me if I would come back and learn from him. As you may imagine, it was the most excited, the most fired-up I had ever been in my young life. I agreed immediately, and rushed back through the scrub to my home. I knew how to be stealthy and sneaked in, inside I found my nanny almost frantic looking for me, she had been about to report me missing to my parents and feared for her position. Filled with a sense of my own importance, I laughed at her and was unkind to her. I dismissed her from my presence and thought no more about it.

The next morning when I awoke, she was not at my side waiting to dress me and feed me. In fact, she had left during the night. My parents were outraged that she would leave with no explanation, but I knew in my heart it was my actions that had caused her to vanish; a spoilt, difficult child and she was only still very young herself she must not have been able to bear it much longer. That was the first time I learnt about the consequences of my actions, and sadly, it has not been the last".

Ashir paused to take a drink and surreptitiously watch Edmund from beneath his beetled brows. The young king was regarding him with a slight frown, his gaze intent but he sat quietly waiting for Ashir to resume his story.

"I returned as soon as I was able to the scrub, and to the spider tree. I found the lamb waiting for me this time, his expression so sad. "My lord, I am here to learn!" I cried, eager to begin at once.

"Where is your nanny child?" the lamb replied.

I blustered and excused myself, I did not know of course. But the lamb would not say anything else to me. In a stink I went away kicking the dirt and headed back to the village. The poverty of the villagers hit me as soon as I walked through the ramshackle huts, it was something I had never thought about before, but the abjectness of life in that village, and in the villages nearby struck me for the first time. This was the life I had driven my nanny back to. I should say, my father was the chief of the village, and I as his only son and heir, a fortunate, cosseted young man".

Edmund did not reply, but smirked a little as his speculation was confirmed.

"I hurried back to the brush and threw myself at the feet of the lamb who was still waiting for me. In a flood of tears, I apologized, sincerely and with the greatest remorse. I felt his velvety nose kiss my head, he bid me rise and said the lessons had begun, that the first lesson is always the hardest to learn. Every day for a year I visited him and learnt from him. Sometimes the lessons were difficult, sometimes the easiest thing in the world. Soon after that my father decided it was time I follow in his footsteps and train for military command. I was distraught, but the lamb convinced me I must honour my father's wishes, and so I began to train. I was of course, excellent." Ashir grinned a little, the humour lightening the arrogance of his words.

"And so I grew, and by the age of 12 was ready for my first military campaign. My father took me with him to battle. Sad as I was to leave my friend the lamb I was excited to be a man at last. You will of course know sire the horrors of a battle-field, the stench of death and despair, the fear of men acid in the air, blood and guts and excrement, that is something that never leaves you. Men who claim to love the fight, they are fools, and they are liars. To keep your men alive, to keep something of yourself as you kill another person, that is the only way to survive through it. And that was what I learnt through those long hard years of campaigns. At 15 my father was killed at the battle of Roushein, on the eastern ridge of Calormen, a small skirmish and not befitting of his military prowess. But so it goes sometimes. After that, I was the chief and protector of my village. I returned home with my men, broken and weary. Young in body, but so old now in spirit. I looked forward to reuniting with my friend the lamb, eager for his wisdom. At the first opportunity I entered the scrub alone and I waited for him, but he did not come. I returned again, day after day, waiting for him but still he did not appear. At first I thought I had angered him, and then later that perhaps I invented him. I carried on with my life. I married, I looked after my village, my children. And when the call went out, I again went back to war. Years passed, last year my youngest son came to me, a sweet child. He confessed he had entered the scrub dared by his older brothers, determined to prove himself not a baby. He had lost his way, found the spider tree in the middle, and a lamb waiting for him".

Ashir smiled a little at Edmund, gentle this time. "The lamb told my son of a world beyond our village, of a green sacred place at the edge of the land. He filled his head with wonder. Then he asked my son to fetch me. Together we walked into the scrub, my son and I, towards the lamb and our destiny. Which of course, is you King Edmund".

Ashir stopped then and waited for the Narnian king to respond.

Edmund hissed in impatience "you have told me nothing".

"I have told you enough, sire".

"Aslan bid you join us? For what purpose?"

"Is that his name? Yes, he asked me to join you, to keep you and your sister safe. He said dark forces surround you both, that should you fall, this world will be consumed and evil will triumph. This is not a matter of war between countries, or assassination plots. Aye…" he held up a hand to stop Edmund's interruption "I know your true purpose in this land. I have been tasked to keep you both safe, and that is what I and my men shall do. We do not seek to interfere with your journey, only to guard you. And once again my lord, I ask you to accept my fealty to you".

Ashir moved from his seat to again kneel before Edmund.

Edmund stared down at him unblinking, his face still, his eyes watching. "Your youngest son?" he asked.

"He is here with me, we hid him in my wagon until I knew you were who I was sent to find. He is still a child".

"Then why bring him?"

"Because sire, it was his destiny".

Edmund's face turned colder, "you might have condemned your own son to death?"

Ashir smiled "I hope not".

Edmund stood, "I accept your fealty Ashir of…?"

"Calabar, my lord"

"Ashir of Calabar, I accept you and your men's fealty to our service. May you bring honour to your house and loyalty to mine, in stead of High King Peter I do so accept".

Edmund offered his forearm to Ashir who returned the clasp with his own, he smiling bowed his head and repeated Edmund's words, the ancient pact binding them.

Just then one of the horses neighed loudly outside, as the sounds of men moving in the early dawn packing up belongings had evidently disturbed it.

With a gasp Lucy awoke too. She sat up abruptly the blanket gathered around her, all rosy skin and golden hair, Edmund felt that inexorable pull to her that never left him. Feeling his chest tighten, his breathing hitch, his heart skipped a beat at the sight of her. This need for her always dominating him. He forced himself to be calm and shrugged on a shirt and breeches. He knew that she was staring warily at Ashir who was smiling beguilingly back at her.

"At your service Queen Lucy" the infuriating man said. Bowing in the way of Narnian courtiers to her.

He heard Lucy's quick intake of breath and she turned wide-eyed at him for a sign as to how to reply.

Edmund sighed and handed Lucy her clothes which she quickly dressed herself with beneath the blanket.

"Ashir is now our ally Lucy" began Edmund ironically, raising a sardonic eyebrow at the man still bent before his sister.

"What can you mean?" she snapped back now fully dressed and pushing the blanket back to rise to her feet.

"Ashir?" Edmund gestured to the man, "care to explain?"

Susan stirred sleepily beneath the cool cotton blankets, feeling the solid hard body beside her, an arm locked about her waist, and nose and chin nuzzled into her hair. Stretching, she attempted to extricate herself.

She heard the half-growl at her ear, and the arm pull her further back against the body of the man next to her, securing her in place.

"Peter" she sighed.

He kissed her neck, and she felt him reach up to cup a breast.

"No, there's no time, and I cannot be here now, I must return to my quarters".

He was ignoring her, his hand now inching up beneath her nightdress.

She wiggled around to face him, his eyes were closed but his mouth smiling, he was still half asleep she knew. He crooked one eye at her, and bent forward to kiss her nose.

"Good morning my queen" he croaked.

Smiling Susan pushed him fully onto his back, and leaning over kissed him hard until he was properly awake.

As his hands came up to grip her arms, she successfully wriggled away from him out of the bed, and threw on her robe which she had discarded on the floor last night.

"So cruel sister" Peter said, propping himself up in bed, his arms crossed behind his head watching her.

She smiled at him, a promise for later, and turned to exit through the door hidden behind the tapestry.

Peter huffed his boredom, wishing this dull ambassador's reception at an end. He had given over one of the smaller halls at Cair Paravel to the ambassador from The Lone Islands who had requested an opportunity to host a small gathering for the purposes of networking with the other ambassadors and officials currently stationed at the Narnian palace. Although Peter knew his real object of desire to be one of Susan's ladies-in-waiting, who just at this moment was dancing with The Lone Islands ambassador, and by the look of her pink smiles, he was successfully winning her over.

Turning away from the couple, Peter sought out his sister in the crowd, catching sight of her gleaming dark hair, threaded through with silver crystals, she gave the impression of constellations in the sky. He allowed his eyes to drift down her body, the dark blue dress so simple in design but artfully clinging to every curve. She was a master at the art of inspiring desire in men, and Peter knew there was not a man here who did not want her, including that damned ambassador though he was all for making calf-eyes at her maid.

Surrounded by officials from all of the different nations currently residing at the palace, his sister seemed to be successfully holding some sort of democratic congress Peter thought with an amused snort, the humour tempering the unexpected frission of jealousy he felt watching her with other men.

Theirs had never been a relationship built on possession and ownership, but rather an equal partnership with both parties accepting only the pleasure the other would willingly give. They worked better as partners, Peter knew, it was what they had always agreed upon, when this arrangement between them had first been decided. And yet…though she might not want it, and though he would not force it upon her, the thought that she was his and his alone echoed through his brain.

Susan looking up caught his eye, and he watched her crimson lips smile that secret smile that was for him alone, it reassured him and he nodded slightly back at her.

She had insisted upon this gathering, that they agreed to the ambassador's request. He knew she was still convinced there was a mole in the palace, and was doing her best to ferret the information out of the half-drunk, half-in-lust officials currently playing at being courtiers to her, fetching her drinks and vying for her attention.

He forced himself to turn away to speak to some of the other guests. He was glad King Lune had returned to Archenland, no longer could they pretend Corin was still a guest at the palace when he had not been seen for the past 2 weeks.

Peter found himself trotting out the same lines in response to queries from the guests, yes Corin was well, but he had had to return to Archenland with his father. No Edmund was no longer at the palace, but surveying the borders, yes Lucy was still visiting Mr Tumnus in the northern quarter of Narnia, no they did not know when to expect her back. That last question had come from a particularly eager young buck, an admirer of Lucy's Peter recalled, his round cheeks blushing as he asked the High King about his sister.

Peter fixed him with a steely glance, "we expect her to visit her fiancé, Prince Corin after seeing Mr Tumnus", he said warningly to the young man.

"Of course, sire" he said quickly in response, his eyes on the ground, cheeks burning.

Peter smiled a little in response, and relenting said "I shall be sure to let her know you asked after her when next she writes".

The young man bowed his thanks, and Peter moved on.

The sound of laughter interrupted his thoughts, the men around Susan had grown bold and wild in her favour, and were shouting over each-other in the hopes of making her laugh. She raised one elegant eyebrow at Peter in quizzical amusement and turning responded to the joke one of her admirers whispered in her ear.

Sighing in disgust, Peter made his excuses and left the hall, walking until he found the small terrace that overlooked the garden, the sweet-smelling flowers on the vines perfumed the night air and shielded him from view as he stared out onto the still garden below. He could faintly hear the raucous noise of the party from where he was, but the hum of insects at work and the quiet breeze calmed him, as he leaned against the marble balustrade.

As was happening more and more, his thoughts turned to Edmund and Lucy, and to the quest he had so foolishly agreed to. The idea of either of them in danger turned his stomach, had him feeling queasy with fear. He should not have let them go. Though they did what they must for Susan, and the idea of anything happening to her was so abhorrent that Peter refused to even countenance a future without her, the fact of it was she was his to protect first and utmost. He should have been the one to lead the mission to kill Rabadash, it should be Edmund here in Narnian, scheming, clever Edmund, his agile brain much better served in discovering the traitor in the castle.

He was interrupted in his thoughts of self-loathing by a pair of slim white arms which came around his waist, and a soft body against his back. The smell of her as ever, irises and sandalwood, comforted and aroused him.

"Why do you hide my king?" she whispered in his ear.

"I fear for them" he replied softly, staring down at the shadowed trees beneath them, his breath hitching at the thought of Lucy, still a child, in peril.

"I know" she said, and rested her forehead against his back "as do I".

And then with the utmost gentleness, she kissed his neck up until his earlobe which she sucked, her hands questing down his front until she found his trousers.

With a gasp he turned to look at her over his shoulder. She was so beautiful in the moonlight, the crystals reflecting the sparkling light in her eyes as she smiled at him. He turned her so she was resting against the thick marble balcony and pushed up her dress reaching for her. Usually so careful, she would not let him reveal their relationship outside of the privacy of their rooms, but he could sense that she wanted this now as much as him.

He made love to her quietly and intensely against the balcony, their muted gasps and sighs the only noise to disturb the peace of the garden. And when they had finished, he rested his forehead against hers and tenderly kissed her as she wrapped her arms around his neck.

"They will come back to us" she whispered to him intensely "by all that is right and just, they will return".

He kissed her again in response, before taking her hand to lead her to his room