^^**Pussy**^^
Alex's POV:
There's billion of things you learn to do every day. I still remember when I first learned how to ride a bike. How could I ever forget? That's the same day I lost my virginity. I hope you know why…
I remember learning how to prank call professionally. I do it every time I'm bored. In fact when I took Sonny to the doctor's yesterday she gave me her phone to hold and I called someone under the name of Sylvia. .
"Hello this is Stephanie Lopez and--"
"Oh I'm sorry we're not interested." Damn you, you bitch.
"Wait, I assure you what I'm offering is absolutely free of charge." Except for Sonny of course. She instantly ooh's .
"Well, what are you giving away?" Cheap ass, everything has to be free right?
"Well we are giving out free trials for our new product. Vaginex." I hold in the urge to laugh.
"I'm sorry what?"
"Vaginex, it's our new product from proactive."
"And it's called Vaginex?" Ok, take a deep breath.
"Yes, our dermatologists here at proactive have formulated this new product… Vaginex it's proactive for your vagina." I hear coughing on the other line. I don't want you to die now. "Ma'am are you ok? I know how you feel I got just as excited when I knew my vagina was going to look like a princess. Between you and me, my boss even gave me a raise."
"I'm sorry but how did you get my number? I think you've got the wrong number." Shitbucket!
"Well you see, when you buy the product you have the option to refer us to one of your friends and well I'm sad to say that you've been referred."
"What!? I've been referred? By who?"
"That's confidential and don't get angry Vaginex is going to do wonders for you. Can you give me your name?"
"God, look I don't know this, this Vaginex. I- Does it really look that bad?" Oh, she sounds foxy. I could take advantage of this.
"Well...you can email the company at send us a picture and we'll tell you." Hah, that's actually my real email.
"I'm sorry what was that?"
"It's . Look Sylvia, Vaginex is a revolutionary product. It cures oily skin, dry skin, if you have scars it's GONE."
"Your kidding, see I got cut shaving one day and I don't know what to--" Gah, I don't want to imagine.
"It's ok, Vaginex will save you. In fact act now and you can even get our mint spray for free, don't even pay shipping. We'll pay for that too!"
"Mint spray how does that work?"
"Well it's pretty easy really, whenever you want to be minty fresh you spray some and It'll actually foam because it's soap. You do your thing and you will be smelling better than a brand new pack of gum. I swear there is nothingbetter than a minty vagina." I'm about to laugh when I notice that Mitchie is giving me the most confused look ever. I mute the phone immediately.
"What are you even--"
"Prank call shh!" I pull her over to the sofa so she can hear the conversation.
"Wait, is that Sonny's phone?" I nod and shush her again. I put the phone between us, Sylvia hadn't stopped rambling about prices and I stop her.
"You sound so excited don't ya. So, Can you tell me your information your referee only gave me his number and your name." I take a pen from Mitchie's hair and begin to write on my hand. Maybe I'll just send her something by mail.
"My name is Sylvia Munroe--"
"Oh my god, grandma!" what the fuck? "Yes, this is Mitchie." Mitchie takes the phone from my hands. "…No grandma, that was Allison's friend…yeah, I guess. Ok, I'll tell her that." Mitchie grips the phone tightly biting her bottom lip to hold in her laugh.
"You're kidding me right?" She shakes her head trying for her life to hold it in. "What did she say?"
"Well she asked if she could get a discount on Vagynex, on account that you're Sonny's friend." An d she explodes right there keeling heself in front of the black leather sofa in the waiting room. I myself find myself joining her.
"Don't laugh…If, if you hadn't arrive any sooner I'd be in that restroom having phonesex with her." She covers her face with her palms and I can see her shake. The pillow closest to me knocks her hard on the head but she can't stop laughing. This only triggers it further. "Stop it." I whine.
That was so fucking embarrassing. Mitchie would look at me and giggle for the rest of the day. I can't believe I did that.
Anyways, back to the point, we learn everything every day. A few months ago, I learned that I could actually be friends with Chad. Yes, the Chad Dylan cooper. In fact Chad, Tawni, Mitchie Grady, Nico, Sonny and I all hang out together. Of course I have to keep Sonny and Chad far apart from each other. When ever we would go to the movies or hang out at Sonny's they would get into constant arguments.
I learned to befriend Tawni, now that she thinks I won't rape her anymore. We can even go to the same restroom without me getting hit. I learned that I can trust the girl and that she's not as dumb as she seems. When she invited the whole crew to her birthday party she secluded me and asked me what was going on with me and Sonny.
"Oh come on, I know you guys are dating."
"Wha- we're just friends. What are you talking about?" Damn you Sonny. Why did you have to wear skinnies tonight? You know I am not trained to hold any glances in.
"If that's what you consider your friend then I so don't want to be your friend anymore." I giggle at this.
"So, how long?"
"We're not dating." She looks at me like 'you fucking liar, you know you're fucking Sonny.' "I'm not lying. Look, I like her but I don't know if she does too. We're not dating."
"Don't know if she doesn't like you? She's eyeball fucking you all the time." Gah, that's so sweet, I got eyeball fucked!
"Really?"
Which reminds of something else I learned. Tawni can't keep secrets. Soon Nico, Grady and even Zora were giving me advices on how to date Sonny. Zora even gave me a strap-on. How does she even know what that is? I can't say I'm not going to use it but it does make me a little uncomfortable to be around her.
A week ago I learned that Chad has really good taste in clothes. I am not kidding, he was the one who chose the bathing suit I'm wearing.
Which reminds me of something that I haven't learned…how to swim. What 18-year old women doesn't know how to swim?
Now don't mock me yet, the only reason why I don't know how to swim is because I had the sexiest teacher when I was 12. The only thing she taught me was how to drown in pleasure. Something that is not going to help me right now. The pool is from five to twelve feet deep. So I'm right here inside the pool on the five feet part.
"Dude, go get the ball."
"What ball? I thought I was supposed to get the net."
"Are you serious? I got the nets you idiot."
"Relax, I got plenty balls. I'll just go get one. Anyone wanna help?" Chad winks my way.
"Ooh, I'll help." This will get me out of playing this game. I don't exactly think they'll do it in the five feet side. I'm interrupted by weight situated on my back.
"Your balls aren't that big Chad, you can do it yourself." Ooh, a jealous Sonny is even better than a minty vagina. Sonny places her head on the curve of my neck.
"What was that about?" I say grabbing onto Sonny's legs that is conveniently wrapped around my waist.
"Nothing, he's just so annoying."
"Sure, you know you were just jealous. Because you love me." I say holding on to her hands to then place them on my hips.
"Shut up."
"Nope, admit it. You have to tell everyone that you are in love with--" Sonny's hands pressure my waist tickling me. "No…Sonny, Stop." I try to talk between my fit of laughter. She doesn't obey me though and only laughs at me.
"Never." Withough even noticing it I've moved from where I was due to my laughing. My sides are hurting so much!
"Sonny, stop. I'm ser--" Gah…I'm not at five feet anymore. The water is over my head and I'm unable to go back to five feet due to Sonny's weight. Gah, my vagina is to pretty for me to die! And that's without using Vaginex. Maybe that's why I'm about to die now. I should have never done that prank call.
Sonny finally get's off of me and swims away before I can reach for her. Fuck, you fucking fucker. Oh, god I can't die. Damn, it's all my swim teacher's fault.
"Like anyone's going to believe that Alex. Just come out already." That's easy for you to say, you know how to swim.
"Hel…out!" I try to get the most air I can get but it's not enough. Fuck, Sonny. I'm not the one who is the actress. How dumb is she?
"Is she ok? Get her out!"
"She's just ac--" Hands wrap around my waist and I'm driven up again. There is no way I'm going in that pool again. "Oh, god is she breathing?" Mitchie literally throws me on the floor. Am I destined to die or something? I decide to play dead just to not go back in my pool again.
"Sonny give her CP--"
"Oh my god, Alex!" She slaps me right across my face. What the hell is wrong with her? How in the world am I going to be saved like that? Thank god she isn't a lifeguard.
"What the hell is wrong with you!" Mitchie tells voluble. I hear people in the background coming to see what's going on. Mitchie pinches my nose and lifts my chin up. She then opens my mouth and blows air into me and not that naughty kind of way. Her hands pushes down on my chest hard.
I finally open my eyes. Ouchie, I'm definitely learning how to swim with an ugly teacher now. I don't know if Mitchie saw if my eyes were open or not but she places her lips on my again and breathes into my mouth again. When she's about to put pressure on my chest again I then cough.
"Are you--" Sonny pushes Mitchie to the side making her land on the floor.
"Oh god I'm so sorry." I look to the side where Mitchie is helped up by Justin. He then goes to me before she can even say thank you. Well that's kind of rude considering she just savedme. "Let me take you inside, I'm so sorry." Sonny pulls my hand from the floor and takes me in before I can even thank Mitchie. Inside Grady is arguing with Nico once again. Are they gay too?
"Uh,--"
"Come on, I don't think you want to swim anymore after what I did. Let's just go inside and change, ok?" I nod and she leads me to my room while I'm still a little bit traumatized. That was so fucking scary. I'm in fact kind of scared to be alone with Sonny now. I mean did she do that purposely after what I did to her grandma? Did Mitchie tell her? Gah, I hope she didn't.
I seriously thought I was going to die. Gah, I shouldn't be alone with Sonny. I mean normally all I think is just tying her down to my bed and having my way with her but with the psychopath that she Is I think that won't end well. After drying myself up and putting an old T-shirt on Sonny does the same putting one of my old pajama top on. Of course being the pervert that I am ,I almost drooled when she took her bathing suit off. I even saw a small part of her nipple! Damn, I'm so fucking perverted. I should join a group or something. Normally someone who almost drank all of the water in the pool doesn't think boobs right away. No matter how cute her nipple seemed. Gah! Stop you fucking pervert.
Sonny's about to climb in bed with me when my door opens. Ever heard of knocking. Sonny and I could have been having sex right now; People need privacy!
"God, Alex are you ok?" Justin walks into my room with his shorts as his only garment. He almost trips over my bathing suit just to hug me. "I would have died If something would of happened to you." I hug back . I don't want to get all mushy in front of Sonny, who feels a little embarrassed and a probably a little guilty at this, but that was so adorable. Mostly because I know it's true.
I smile a little before letting go. "I'm cold"
"Let me guess, want me to bring you guys some hot chocolate?" I nod. It's like having my own little chef. "I'll get you some right away. Are you hungry too?"
"Not after that scare. Later." Nodding Justin leaves my room. Sonny hesitates before walking over to me, I have to pull her on my lap to get her close to me.
"Why didn't you tell me you can't swim?"
"Pfft, I can swim…just not in water." She lifts the sheets up and crawls her hands against my waist just to rest her head on the crook of my neck. I love how sweet she gets out of nowhere just after she was about to let me die of course.
I run my fingers down her back. "Sorry…really."
"S'okay. I'll just carry a knife every time I'm with you from now on." She buries her face deepen into my neck and whines.
"Seriously, I know Justin said this already but if you'd die I don't know what I'd do." Yay! It's so much better when I hear it from her. Maybe I should just throw myself in the pool again.
Hell no.
"Ow!" Nothing hurts really I'm just looking to see if she'll kiss me or something. Sonny's face goes pallid.
"What's wrong?"
"My shoulder hurts." I state like a five-year old. Hey, what ever gets her lips on mine works.
"You want me to get off?"
"No dummy."
"Then?" I made a loud kissing sound. She rolls her eyes and does it anyways. "Better?"
"Yep. Fuck!"
"What now?"
"I bit my tongue…?" Sonny shoves my face to the right giggling.
"Will you stop flirting for one minute?"
"Well excuse me, I'm not the one who is basically straddling me."
"Well, you do have a point there." She's about to climb off me.
"Pussy."
"Alex don't start that aga--"
"Pussy." She licks her lips smiling.
"I'm not going to ki--"
"Pussy?" she opens her mouth but I stop her by repeating the word in a singsongy way.
"You're reall--"
"Pussy."
"Stop it." She looks directly at my eyes but I don't care.
"Pussy." now I make it as if all I can say is 'pussy' and I'm trying to respond to her words. "Pussy. Pussy, pussy? "
"Ok, fine."
I grab her phone and make believe like I'm talking. "Hello…Pussy?…Yeah, she's here." I hand the phone to her and she rolls her eyes.
"You done?"
"Pussy, pussy, pussy, pu--" Sonny grabs either side of my face determined to shut me up.
"Shut up!"
"Pussy, pussy, pussy, pussy, pussy?"
"Fine, you know what fine." She states while I continue with my 'pussy' rant. Sonny places a soft kiss on my nose and I stop. I hold to her waist and we make eyes contact. Gah, now I forgot if I'm supposed to go left or right. Ok, let's just let her do everything. No, that means that I don't have interest but I do! Wait, it is left. Ok, I place a kiss on her butt chin prolonging my time frame there. Sonny's hands are around my neck and it's go time baby. She goes left and I can feel her breath on my lips.
"Um…sorry. Didn't know you guys were making out." As a reflex, I ninja-kicked Sonny to the floor. Well, guess who's not going to have a sexy make-out session today?
'Wha- we we're making out. What are you talking about?" Mitchie stands there with a blank face. Why can't I know what she's thinking? That's one difference between Sonny and Mitchie. I know what Sonny is thinking without even looking at her but Mitchie is as mysterious as batman or something.
"I brought you guys your hot chocolate." Justin has a baffled expression as he sees Sonny trying to stand up.
I climb off my bed and make my way to Mitchie. As awkward as this is I have to thank her for saving me.
"Mitchie--"
"It's ok, I just came to see how you're doing. I'll just leave you guys alone, k?" She didn't let me say anything and just pivoted away from my room. I turn to Sonny who is on her way to follow Mitchie…angry?
"Where's Alex. I heard she almost--"
"Be right back." She closes the door to my room in our faces. .
"What just happened?" I shush and of course like nosy asses that we are Justin, Tawni and I press our ears to my door.
"Mitchie…" She makes an attempt to whisper the last part. "What the hell?"
"What?"
"Why would you say that we were making out?" Justin and Tawni look at me shocked.
"Oh my god." Tawni gives me a little quick hug.
"Isn't that what you were doing?"
"Wh- of course not"
"What exactly are you mad at? Me disrupting you steamy expedition in Alex's mouth or me having to brains to connect that you guys have something? Oh, I know you're mad because I have her CPR? I mean you basically threw me to the pool." Well, I am speechless.
"I had everything under control."
"You left her drowning in the pool. How is that 'under control'?" Should I intervene? Nope, I already got slapped today. Although twins fighting.
"I can't believe were arguing over this. Let's stop ok. I don't even know what's wrong with--"
"You know what's you? What's wrong with you is that you don't' have he guts to tell Alex that you're in love with her but as soon as anyone looks at her you go all psychopathic. That's why you're always fighting with Chad because he has the balls to tell Alex in her face that he likes her."
"That's not true."
"Whatever Sonny but when soon enough someone else will get through Alex's eyes and no matter how big of 'friends' she's going to forget about you because you're just a pussy."
Without warning I hear a noise. Gah! I'm so bad at deciphering noises. Did Sonny slap her? Did she push her to the floor again? Did she step really hard on a roach? Wait, we have roaches?
The door to my room opens and I fall on the floor.
"Oh, my god can you find it quick I can't see." Tawni starts, thank god she's an actress.
"Did you look under my--"
"Alex, I have to go." I stand up quicker than you can say Vaginex.
"What?"
"I'll explain tomorrow, okay?" She pecks my cheek quickly and runs out, keys in her hands.
"Wait, so did you guys make out or not?"
______________________________________________________________________________
I haven't thought about anything else but what Mitchie told Sonny. Yes, I know that Chad likes and that Sonny does too. But I haven't thought about just stopping caring for Sonny and just date someone else. As much as I adore Sonny I have been all over her for over three or four month I think. I don't even know anymore. I've lost count.
And on top of that Chad isn't bad looking; in fact, he's very handsome. He's funny and cute sometimes. We do have things in common. Probably more than what I have with Sonny. At first I thought that Sonny's just playing hard to get but one thing is playing hard to get and another thing is tampering with my patience. See how she likes it if I play with her mind?
Mitchie's so sweet standing up for me like that. I still have to thank her for before. Maybe later, right now I think I'll just go online and try to forget about Sonny for a second and just watch WhatTheBuck videos until I get sleepy.
Wow, what a coincidence. Michael Buckley just posted a video that's called "HOMOSEXUALS ROCK" You know I'm going to email this to Sonny. Homosexual do rock.
"You're retarded don't send her that."
"Chad, just let her. Although if I were you I'd just give Sonny a break or something. You've been working too hard."
"Ooh, I got new emails!" We're all bored sitting in my bed looking at videos me resting on Chad's chest. Justin to my left, Tawni laying her head on my lap Nico and Grady next to Justin and Zora.
"Open it."
"Uh… no, you guys are nosy." Chad running his hands through my hair.
"Oh, come on Alex. Just show us."
"She's probably getting porn videos sent to her." Nico teases before I slap the back of his head.
"Or pictures of Sonny naked." At this Grady takes the laptop of my hands.
"Grady, give it back!" I try to snatch it but he turns around in a way that we can all see my emails.
"Let's see…Oh, this one…Thank you for your help today. I hope this picture will help you understand how badly I need your help." Who the hell is that? Well if it's a hot girl then I don't care if they see it or not. Unless it's Sonny. I don't want anyone to see my girlfrie-- I mean friend naked.
"If your girlfriends saw this she'd kill you."
"Cheating on Sonny so fast, Alex?" I get a pat from Nico who is snickering.
"I can't believe you, Alex." Giggles Tawni. "Why resort to cyber-sex when you can just have sex with your girlfriend?"
"I told you guys that Sonny and I aren't dating yet…I don't even know who the hell that is."
"Yeah, It's probably on of those scams I always fall for." We all look at Zora. "What? Oh, will you just click on the picture already?"
We all switch our focus to the laptop now on Grady's lap.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Tawni and I just jump out of my bed scared for our lives. I can't even compare the picture I've seen to anything human. I didn't even know that I had enemies. Why would someone send me such a horrible thing?
On the screen of my computer is a female reproductive system. At least what's left of it. What remains now in bits of skin full of scars and I don't even know what else. My eyes
"What the fuck is wrong with this Sylvia Munroe?"
Review if you wish to. FYI i will recheck the mistakes later. Too tired.