I own nothing of the Twilight Universe. I owe great squishy hugs to Vagabonda, Beachcomberlc and IpsitaC77. And possibly a large bottle of something very smooth.

Chapter 21

Carlisle came to just as the sow was gingerly stepping over him toward her escape. The first thing he saw was nipples; big ones, and many of them. He rubbed his eyes with his fists and was rewarded with a knock to the head by a passing pig's trotter. Edward was shouting something Carlisle couldn't understand. Wincing and moaning, he sat up to see the sow headed for the woods, a calf on the front porch and the angriest Edward Masen he had ever seen, Junior or Senior.

Carlisle made no effort to move as he watched Edward convince the calf to leave the porch and coaxed it back into the barn. Edward kicked his foot hard as he passed and unleashed a string of very colourful names at him — names he would never have the gall to say in front of a lady. Carlisle just lay there, his injuries smarting, laughing to himself because he was the one who taught Steady Eddie all those curse words in the first place.

Once the calf was safely back in its pen, Edward checked on Leah and her pups. Emmett was sitting next to her, stroking her head and talking to the puppies. The boy looked up at him silently, but his brows were furrowed. Edward ruffled Emmett's already messy hair and let him be. He was ashamed that both his sons had witnessed his fight with Carlisle, and then his harsh words with Bella. He felt like an ass, remembering the way she couldn't wait to get out of the house and leave him, and now, knowing his boys would be heartbroken again.

Walking back through the barn, Edward grabbed several lengths of rope, his hammer and a handful of nails. The faster he got the fence fixed, the sooner he could corral the animals that had run off when he punched Carlisle through the damn thing. Then he could go after Bella and convince her to come back home; back to him and back to his boys. He'd try to win her over with the promise of a real marriage. No more thinking and pondering, for once he was going to say exactly what was in his heart. He wasn't above begging for forgiveness it that's what it took to get her back. They'd finally be together, as a family, a real family

Unfortunately, rounding up the livestock had to take priority over finding Bella. The well-being of his family depended on those animals; if they injured themselves in the woods or someone stole them, everyone would suffer. Edward knew Bella would understand the cause for his delay when he found her. Edward kicked Carlisle's foot again when he reached the breach in the fence.

"Get your fool ass up and help me round up the livestock. It's your damn fault they ran off."

"How'd you figure that? I didn't ask you to put me through the fence." Carlisle whined

"You were begging for a beating and that's the result. I don't have time to argue with you about it. Just get yourself up and help right this mess. I need to go get my wife."

Carlisle tried to stand up, but found his knees wobbly and his head spinning. He flopped back down again.

"Bella ran off?"

Edward held two pieces of broken fence rail together and tried to nail a brace across them. It promptly fell apart. The job needed at least two more hands. Edward whistled at Carlisle to get his attention and nodded at the fence rail. If the fence looked solid his animals wouldn't test it.

Carlisle held the lower rail in wait for Edward to fix it, before moving to hold the rest while still on his knees. He knew better than to try standing just yet. The beating he took had knocked the stuffing right out of him. He knew if he tried to stand, he'd groan and gripe like an old man, giving Edward fodder to tease. This beating made Carlisle realize he wasn't as spry a man anymore. He really needed to find himself a wife and soon — someone to care for his every wish while he was still in his prime and look after him when he got old.

"Bella say anything about me?" Carlisle eyed Edward's hammer, regretting the stupid question as soon as he let it loose.

"She told me you made a play for her; can't say I'm surprised. Then she hacked off her braid to pay off her debt." Edward said with a sneer towards Carlisle.

"Shit. Really? I don't right care for short hair on my women. Makes 'em look wrong, somehow. I don't know if I'd want Bella now that she's got short hair. . ."

Carlisle wrinkled his nose at the idea of Bella with cropped hair. Her long braid was bewitching. Many nights he'd lain awake imagining slowly unplaiting her hair and running his fingers through it or using the thick braid like a tether while engaging in very enjoyable behaviour. Rachel and her severe topknot only made him want to bonk her on the head like a bell.

"She's my wife," Edward shouted. "It's not up to you to like her hair or not. Once we've fixed this mess you've made, I don't ever want to see hide nor hair of you again."

"Wait — you were serious about that? You're kicking me out? You're throwing away all these years of friendship over a skirt?"

"No, you're the one who ruined everything. And she is not just a damned skirt — she's a fine woman, my woman and a hell of a lot more important in my life than you." Edward dropped his hammer in the dirt. The fence would hold well enough for now. He was too tempted to use the hammer for other reasons, like pounding Carlisle into mush.

It took an hour and a half of searching before all the animals were found, save one determined young rooster. Edward decided he'd gladly eat that loss if it meant he could go searching for Bella all the sooner. Carlisle could be seen limping from a well-placed kick the sow had given him when he tried to re-introduce her to her pen.

After a side-splitting laugh at the trapper's expense, Edward took a final inventory of the situation. None of the shoats had escaped; their pen beside their mother's hadn't been damaged in the fight. Now that the stock was safe, Edward could turn his attention to chasing Bella down and bringing her home.

Edward saddled his mare, Jessie, and brought her out to the yard. He was surprised to see Carlisle mounted on his own horse and waiting for him.

"We'll find her faster if we split up, Ed. Tell me which path to take and I'll help find her."

"And try to make another play for her hand? I ain't that stupid." Edward mounted his horse and flicked the reins.

"I swear I'll just bring her back here — no funny business at all." Carlisle made a sign of a cross and spit on to the ground as a way to seal his pledge.

"Fine. Most likely she's going to town and back to Stanley's. She went over that hill there." He pointed in the direction of town.

Edward called out to Emmett and told him to keep an eye on Jasper, instructing him and his brother to stay put in the house like they had been warned to do. Leah would alert them if anything should happen. Edward didn't plan on being away from home for very long. Riding his horse to town took only about an hour or so, both ways, providing he could get Jessie to go at a good clip.

Ten minutes into the ride, the road forked. The creek that ran past the farm fed into a small egg-shaped lake, and the town of River Forks bordered the lake's far side.

One path led left, around the lake, following its shoreline. The other path disappeared to the right through the woods.

While the path through the woods seemed to be the daunting and foreboding choice, it ended up in town much faster as it was a straight shot through the trees, followed by a slight turn, and then another direct path leading right into River Forks. The shoreline path looked at first to be easier — out in the sun and open. It was, in fact, a much longer trek, full of boulders, tree roots and diversions. The shoreline path took closer to two hours to walk as opposed to the forest trail, which took just over an hour at a brisk pace.

Carlisle supposed Bella would have taken the windy path around the lake, reasoning that she would want to keep the town in her sights rather than journey through the dark woods.

Edward didn't argue with him; he knew Bella would have taken the wooded path — it was the only way she knew to get back to town. It was the route they had taken to get to the farm that first day.

The men parted company, each glad to be rid of the other.

While Edward and Carlisle were still making repairs and chasing cows, Bella had already reached the fork in the road.

She'd sat at the lake's edge for a good long time, long enough for a cleansing cry. She was past angry and well on the way to becoming enraged, mostly at herself. Bella found it soothing, sitting near the water and throwing rocks, cursing as loudly as she dared.

Once Bella had finished crying and cursing, she dried her eyes with the hem of her petticoat and tucked her hair behind her ears. She felt so foolish. It was a rash thing to do — running out of there like that, hacking her braid off and leaving.

Bella's foolhardiness gave way to despondency. She'd left her heart behind as well, just like her hair; she was certain of it. Her heart was still at the farm, shredded into pieces of her own doing. Left behind were equal parts for Jasper and Emmett, a sliver or two for Leah and her babies, but the biggest part of her heart she had slipped into Edward's pocket without his knowledge. He'd never know just how much she cared for him.

She knew she'd never be the same with the mangled remnant she'd kept for herself. She'd carry on, but nothing would ever be right again; Bella knew she'd never feel for another man the way she felt for Edward. Her hair would grow back, but not the missing pieces of her heart. The price Edward would get for the braid was cheap in comparison to what she had really left behind.

Bella wished she could go back and tell the boys that none of this was their fault. She would tell Emmett and Jasper she still loved them, that their father loved them and that they should always mind him. She would explain to them that it was simply time for her to move on, and that was the only reason she left. With time, she hoped, they'd forget the fighting and yelling.

She thought about writing them letters, but there was no guarantee Edward would read them to the boys, and neither Emmett nor Jasper could read well enough for what she really wanted to say to them. Perhaps a few years down the road she could write them and they'd understand.

She reached up to wipe her eyes and ran her hands over her hair to smooth it. It was a habit she performed several times a day by rote, to tame any strands that may have escaped her braid. Bella had forgotten what she had done to herself for a moment and was horrified by what she felt. Her hair was longer on the right side, hanging well past the edge of her jaw almost to her shoulder, but just under her jaw on the left. She could feel the back was several differing lengths. Bowing her head, she could see the jagged edges of her once lovely hair.

She hadn't cut her hair more than half an inch at a time since she was a young girl. Bella hoped Irina was still working at the laundry since she could fix hair better than any Parisian hairdresser Bella had ever known. Irina worked for trade, too. For someone who worked in a laundry, Irina hated to wash her own clothes. Bella could do her laundry in exchange for a haircut and call the whole thing even.

Bella reached into her carpet bag and found her bonnett. She tucked as much of her shorn hair under the hat as possible. No one walking through town would see her hair until Irina had a chance to fix it. Once presentable, she could see about getting a job. Perhaps the hotel could use a cook or a housekeeper.

Stanley would hire her for certain, and treat her well enough, but Bella saw the laundry as a last resort. However, six months at the laundry would see the rest of her debt paid, plus leave her enough money to move to another town. Bella thought of heading back east, possibly south this time. Maybe she'd see where adventure would take her. She laughed, recognizing the sheer absurdity of that idea. What she really wanted was to stay in River Forks in hope of seeing Edward and the boys whenever they came to town. She could live satisfied with just a glimpse of them every few months.

Standing and brushing the moss and dirt from the back of her skirt, Bella tried to harden the rest of her heart, determined to journey on.

She continued walking down the trail into the woods; Bella found it peaceful in the mid-afternoon sun. There was a bite to the air and frost wasn't too far away, perhaps a day or so. An idea struck her — she'd not be cold this winter working at the laundry, that was for sure.

Bella laughed at her own folly.

After a sharp curve of the trail, the grade dropped severely. Bella remembered this hill from when she first walked to the farm. It was a bear of a hill; after having climbed several smaller hills it was disheartening to see, and even worse to negotiate. Her legs, she recalled, were on fire not even halfway up and she had considered herself a very fit person. Bella looked down at her feet. With the slight heel of her stout boots, Bella would have to pick her way carefully down the hill for fear of falling. The last thing she needed was another bruise on her body to match her bruised heart. She'd already had far too much pain for one day.

Gingerly, she made her way down the steep hill, taking short strides and often stepping sideways. About three-quarters of the way down, Bella stopped and reexamined what she was doing. She was tired of cautiously navigating her life, carefully watching her tread so as not to harm or be harmed. She didn't want to keep living her life that way, hampered and tentative, allowing others to dictate her actions — much like the way she was hesitantly maneuvering this hill.

What could really come to her if she wasn't so careful? A bruise or a scrape? Young and healthy, her bruises would fade and scrapes heal. A scar is just a small reminder of a risk taken. Her heart was broken and would never be fully repaired, but she was still alive. She wanted to remind herself of that, force herself to feel and take some fun when she found it. She needed to believe she'd be able to live, really live again.

Facing the decline, Bella slid her bags down the hill, the small, marble-like rocks causing them to roll most of the way down. With her feet planted firmly, she opened her arms like some giant bird and all but propelled herself down the hill, running as fast as she could. She raced as if she were a young girl again, the wind in her face and the thrill of speed and danger tickling her soul. It was brief, but exhilarating.

Bella skidded to a stop at the bottom of the hill and turned, looking back. There were elongated tracks from her boots for a couple of yards up the base of the hill and then nothing. She looked down and saw an abundance of dust on her skirts and boots. For a moment or two, Bella had enjoyed the feeling of freedom before reality reared its ugly head again. Her heart was still just as broken, and now it was pounding from exertion.

She picked up her bags and continued her journey. There was a bit more breeze at the bottom of the hill and a shiver ran through her. Her pace quickened as tears prickled in her eyes again.

Another five minutes down the path and the wind started to play tricks with Bella's mind. Faint sounds, like a horse's canter, reached her ears. For the first time since leaving Edward, she began to feel vulnerable, scared. The sound of hooves became louder. What would she say if Edward had come chasing after her? She could feel stirrings of hope bloom inside her chest and tamped them down. What if it was Carlisle, or worse, some stranger with less than honourable intentions? Bella juggled her baggage enough to reach into the side pocket of the carpet bag.

Her father had insisted she always carry a hearty plug of ground peppercorns whenever she was travelling. Blown into the face of a marauder or assailant, it would temporarily incapacitate them and allow her a moment or two to either scream or escape. Bella palmed the small cloth pouch and kept the basket fixed in the crook of her arm. She'd throw that too, if needed. Her carpet bag made for a effective weapon as well.

Bella moved to the side of the track, not too close to the edge, but leaving enough room for the rider to pass by. She held her head high, back straight and shoulders firmly set. She did not want to be seen as weak or timid by anyone passing her on the road.

As the horse and rider came closer, she increased her pace. The town was not far off, perhaps ten minutes at a brisk walk. She could just see the first building when she heard her name shouted in the distance.

Bella turned, and dropped her bags to the ground.

AN: I fear I may be stirring up The Tempest, and this note will be Much Ado About Nothing, however As You Like It you should know this story won't post again until Twelfth Night (day). It is not Love's Labour Lost, All's Well That Ends Well, this story will continue, Measure For Measure. This Comedy Of Errors shall return as soon as we Merry Wives of Windsor have feasted and rested. Don't be angry, there is no need for all of us to have to witness The Taming Of The Shrew, so you'll just have to wait a week and stuff it up your Coriolanus.

Cheers and happy which ever holiday you celebrate, dear reader. Thank you for reading.