21. Review Board

The kids were still in bed, no idea if they were asleep. It was just the three of us at the table. Marsha still needs a high chair, but she wants a regular seat, just like she wants silverware. Stevie had her in his lap. She had her spoon in his cereal.

"And she has to go in today, too?"

"Yeah, no days off this week." Don't know if I ate a bite that morning. "Marsha, you want to sit with Mama?"

"Want Daddy."

"You've got him. Like you get everything you ask for from him. No wonder you're the favorite, Stevie. You're the soft touch. I have to lay down the law."

"Sasha, she's still a little off from you going away. Kids don't understand quality time, it's all about quantity."

"And I don't give her enough. Is that what you're saying?" I raised my eyes, but not my face. Marsha had one of those children's yogurts with a red not found in nature. I had a hand up to block my view. "Look, we knew what kind of schedule I had years before we decided to ditch the love gloves and see what happened."

"I'm not saying anything about your job, or you." Stevie sighed. "You get so defensive!"

"Really? Have you ever seen yourself when they talk about education?"

"Mama, Daddy, STOP IT!" Marsha had a strict no fight policy.

"It's okay, Baby." I touched her hair. "Mama and Daddy just have to talk sometimes."

"Want milk, please." She smiled at me.

I went to the fridge. The ketchup was out of place. It went back in the door, behind some pickles. Only one glass will do for Marsha: Picture Perfect Princess. "Here you go."

"Thank you, Mama."

"If I were back in the Corps, I would say Zero Hour is coming up. Sasha, what's wrong?"

"Wrong? Who said anything's wrong? I have a daughter who's ditching me for her Daddy. I won't have a weekend off for who knows how long. I'm not getting more than four hours sleep at a stretch. And did I mention there's a new drug on the streets? Once the addicts start rolling little old ladies, guess who'll be on decoy duty! No, everything's just peachy!"

Marsha just stared at me. Stevie put her down and walked around behind me. Big hands rested on my shoulders. "Your muscles get any tighter and your head'll pop off! You're sure you can't take some time off?"

"Not today. And with Labor Day coming up it won't be soon. Look, I'm sorry, Stevie. It's just been so…so…I just can't talk about it, okay?"

He kneaded my shoulders. He had only minuets when I needed an hour. "Why don't you take time off?"

"Second Day of Junior Class Exams, can't skip out any more than you can." He rested his chin on my head. "And for some reason, we can't just jump in the car and drive off for a few hours like we used to."

Marsha peeked over the table. She needed a change already. I picked her up. "Let's get you ready, again. Unless I call, I'll pick her up." It wasn't much longer before I was kissing them good-bye.

The phone rang. It was Hendricks.

"Police and Fireman Local 679, be there at 1:30."

Nbc

I sat at the table alone with a bottle of vodka. It had been a friend of mine when Daddy was sick, and I was tempted to renew old acquaintances. Vodka's the strong silent type. It leaves no sign on the breath; I knew that from experience on both sides of the law. Damn, forgot a glass.

Ron stood in the entryway. "Sasha, what are you doing?"

I thought about a smart retort, then I remembered what happened with my back seat quip. "Being forgetful. Bottle's here, glasses are over there. Guess I'll pass this time."

"Kim's getting cleaned up." He poured himself a glass of milk and sat down at the table. "I don't know what all happened at Middleton. Kim's told me a little, but she's keeping something back. When she's awake, that is."

He blushed a little. "But she talks in her sleep. We've been fighting for years but never really hurt anybody before. The only person she never held back on was Shego. She's done things to her that would've killed a normal person. Something like that happened, didn't it?"

"Don't know if it's my place to say. Sometimes you have to deal with things on your own."

"Yeah, that's what we dudes say." Ron cocked an eyebrow. "I haven't figured out how to ask her. Kim's a bit of a control freak at times. Part of the reason she stays out of the kitchen. She could be good, but it'll take a little more time than she's used to. It's always been me going off the handle, usually running away, unless it was food."

"She didn't kill anybody, if that what's you're worried about."

"I'm gonna fry up some eggs, you want some?"

"No. I've eaten."

"Then you don't need a liquid breakfast." He picked up the bottle and put it with the others in the cabinet. Well, I'd been holding back anyway.

"You aren't gonna preach at me, are you? I can go to Mom for that. And at least she'd have nothing to say about the vodka."

I could tell he had to work up the courage to look me in the eye. "I'd never tell you what to do…even if you can't shoot plasma." He had his eggs going, and bread in the toaster. "I just hope she remembers she's not alone."

Yeah, she's definitely gonna keep you.

Nbc

They didn't talk about Middleton. It was just the usual kid stuff. I figured she'd tell him soon, maybe after their next visit to the rehab center. Great how the answer to other people's problems are so damn obvious.

"I'll be back sometime before dinner."

"It'll be ready before I leave. Hank's a bit ragged right now…Michelin's in tomorrow." Ron looked at Kim. "You know, this one didn't need a comet; I bet he could throw a truck if he just got mad enough."

"I've seen him throw a few guys. Just stay on his good side."

"Sasha, good luck." Kim must've guessed what was up. She was there, and from what they do, they're pretty much up on standard procedures I bet.

"Thanks."

Nbc

I got to the Local a few minutes early. Since this was unofficial, we were avoiding the office. No one would think twice about some cops meeting here. Reneca was coming out when I closed my car door. When she came up to me I could tell she was rattled.

"You'll be okay." It wasn't too convincing. "They're in the back room, waiting."

I should have just turned the damned bottle up.

Hendricks was there of course. When I saw Chavez I knew I was in trouble. Then I saw who was in charge.

"Please take a seat, Sergeant." Daddy pulled out a digital recorder. "This is an unofficial review of the events of April 23, 2007, involving Sergeants Reneca Cramer and Sasha Barkin. This being the case, no records will be kept of any kind." He took out the batteries and put the recorder back into his pocket.

"Sergeant, in your own words please relate the circumstances and events which compelled you to use deadly force on the night of April 23, 2007."

You've heard it all before, I'm not reliving that one time more than I have to. When I finished, Hendricks leaned forward.

"When you fired the first time, from the sounds of it you critically wounded the suspect. Why didn't you go for an incapacitating wound the next time?"

"I thought the first one was. He was determined to kill the girl. I saw no choice."

Chavez was next. "Pero en su informe, dijiste el sospechoso…"

"Excuse me, sir, that's Spanish."

"Si."

"I'm not so good at it."

"Really? You were confident enough in your abilities on the night in question. Have you forgotten that much, or did you have a shot or two of tequila that evening and the effect's worn off?"

"Sir, I understood what they were saying. Their chief said 'kill the bitch' that was clear enough."

"And you yelled out what? Alto? You told him 'tall'?"

"It means stop also."

"You're sure? I mean; maybe you just hoped something close to 'halt' would work. Do you speak real Spanish, or is it Ricky Retardo?"

"I know alto is correct. I have some talent with languages."

"Yes," Chavez looked sour. "You're great with Polski, and I'm sure your Rus is solid. I'm told you can pretty much ask for a drink anywhere east of the Vistula, at least until you get to Mongolia. I bet you'd be real careful to know what was what before you blast down a fellow Slav, but who cares if another greaser buys it?"

"Sir, I…"

"You used an indistinct word, then compounded the situation by saying 'por favor'. You knew what kind of man you were dealing with. And you said please? How can you work the streets and not understand machismo? The moment you did that, you locked him into a situation which could only have lead to the death of one of you, maybe both."

"He could have put the gun down after I hit him that first time. Instead he pulled back the second hammer. He was determined to kill the girl."

"Or prove himself after being goaded by another girl. A girl who showed weakness at a critical moment."

"Weakness? From Sergeant Barkin?" Hendricks shook his head. "The winner of the all weights and both genders fighting tournament for the Go City PD for three years running? I think we have a different issue. You enjoyed the little scuffle before the gun came out, didn't you, Sergeant?"

"I don't understand, sir."

"You have a long list of collars which needed an ambulance instead of a squad car. How many bones have you broken; not your own, but others?"

"No idea, sir. I've never been investigated for brutality. My record is clean."

"Or guarded by friends in high places." I couldn't believe he said that, or that Daddy didn't knock him out of his seat. "Who'd go after the Chief's daughter?"

"Frankly a lot of people would, sir."

Daddy put up a hand. "Sergeant, how fast can you run the forty in your street clothes?"

"Maybe 5.7, 5.5. It's 5.1 in gym clothes."

"You covered a lot of ground to get reach the first three you subdued, could you have maybe made one last dash to get to the final suspect?"

"I can't outrace a shot gun, sir."

"A weapon held by a man already severely wounded?"

"With a helpless girl as a target. I wasn't going to play with her life."

Thank God it was unofficial. They only went for three hours. Chavez dug at me like crazy. Hendricks made me out to be the nastiest cop to ever walk a beat in Go City. You'd think I got cats out of trees with a chain saw. Daddy's questions were dry and technical and made me doubt everything I had done.

Finally Daddy looked to either side, "Are there any more questions? Hendricks and Chavez shook their heads; they had drawn enough blood for one day.

"This review board is closed. As it is unofficial, no records have been kept, and no report will be given to the Department. A verbal summation of the panel's review will be delivered to the Sergeants within a week. Thank you, Sergeant: that is all."

I got up out of my seat. Words stuck in my throat. All I could do was nod. Daddy's eyes cut me to the core; I knew he wanted to hug me, tell me it would be all right, but that was a Daddy thing, and right now he was the Chief of Police for Go City.

There was a message on my phone. I called Stevie back.

"Are you still picking up Marsha?"

"Yes."

"I'll see you two in a little while, then."

I wanted to beat my head against the steering wheel. No one had come out yet; they were still deciding what kind of monster I was. Others were going into the Local. This was no time to make a scene.

Hey, maybe they'll tell me to stay home tonight