Thank you for reviewing! Sorry for the wait... real life got in the way. A lot. Haha, I've been productive everywhere BUT here...

Holly had just finished the first mind wipe when Artemis hit the ground with a scream.

She spun around with a hand already on her weapon, the sound like an electric shock to her already jangled nerves, to find the human down on one knee, hands braced against the ground and head ducked, ragged hair shielding his face from her. She barely had time to turn fully to face him before he tensed and cried out again, one hand shooting up to grip his head in a vice like grip while the other tightened amidst the dead leaves carpeted across the road.

"Arte-"

A third scream cut her off, and, this time, Artemis collapsed with it, the pale yell sucking every last bit of strength out of him. He fell onto his back with a hard exhale, what little blood that was left in his ashen complexion draining away. "G-get out..." he whispered, one shaking hand jerking to scratch violently at his stomach. "Get out of me... please..."

Holly sprinted to his side in alarm, but Artemis flinched violently at her approach, elbow arcing out to jab her in the ankles before she could even get close. "Don't!" he gasped, and then his chest heaved once, twice, before he twisted onto his other side and vomited onto the leafy ground.

It amounted to little more than bile, but Holly was still left frozen and stricken. She stared with wide eyes as the genius coughed and wheezed, supporting himself on one shaking arm, the other waving vaguely in her direction as if the ward off any attempts to help. He tried to gasp out a word, but it was incomprehensible until the third try, and then, it was so faint she still couldn't hear it.

She stood helplessly, lost and horrified, no idea what was going on or how to help. Artemis was staring sightlessly up at the sky, dichromatic gaze transfixed but, by the hazy, bleary look, blind as well, staring at terrors unseen to the rest of the world. He kept on gasping, fighting for each breath as if he was being strangled, one hand continuing to claw at his stomach so viciously, he first tore his shirt- then, drew blood.

The moment she saw the red bleed through his shirt, Holly jumped into action, the sight spurring her out of her shocked haze and bringing her to her knees. She grabbed Artemis's wrist and yanked it away, pinning it down to street, grabbing at his other hand in a preemptive strike in case he tried to maim himself with that one, too. "Hey! Stop!" she cried. "What the hell are you trying to do?! Artemis!"

But Artemis didn't answer.

Her voice did seem to have sparked a return to reality; the blank look in his eyes faded, the horror twisting his features slowly began to slip away, and the wheezing breaths that rattled in his chest with each passing moment came easier, and were less shallow. Holly risked loosening her grip on his wrists, and when he didn't fight her, releasing him entirely, sitting back cautiously on her heels to watch as Artemis came back to himself.

It didn't take long.

Exhausted, shaking, Artemis turned his head to meet her gaze with wild eyes, ones overtaken by more desperation and panic than she ever would've believe possible from him before. They were hazy with fatigue but aware nevertheless- aware and terrified.

"Hecate," he hissed at last, voice cracking and hoarse- the name akin to an oath. "Hecate, Holly! T-that was... Hecate."

She stayed crouched and frozen, eyes wide as the implications hit her, and Artemis turned to fully face her now, actually slamming one hand against the ground in frustration. "That was Hecate!" he yelled, voice stricken, features horrified. "Why'd you trust him?! He was lying, Holly, of course he was lying- he was going to kill you!" His other hand shot up from the leaves hiding it-

It was clenched tightly around the hilt of a knife.

Holly gasped.

Artemis held it up for her inspection for one long moment before he flung the slim silver blade away from it for it to slide harmlessly across the dirt and thump against a tree. His mismatched eyes were just as wild as before, and Holly stared as the weapon before looking back at him in disbelief. "That- that was Hecate?!" she finally managed, invariably thinking back and trying to compare the icy stranger on the ferry to the smiling genius she'd found just in time just earlier. "But- but he said that-"

"He lied! Is that so hard to believe, Holly?! He lied to you to get that chance!"

"But- no!" She shook her head in denial, trying to just not believe it, but the evidence was all right there in front of her, impossible to negate or ignore. But she tried, still, because she still could not believe that Hecate and Artemis were one in the same- because Hecate had tried to kill her. "No! Why didn't he, then?! How'd you manage to switch with him, to get back in control?! Foaly said you shouldn't be able to!"

Artemis shivered at the question, the motion so pronounced it was almost a jerk, and twitched his head around to look away. His face, if possible, grew even whiter, and his eyes darkened for a moment before he just shook his head in one quick twitch. "...I wasn't supposed to be able to," he muttered, hooded eyes focused on the ground rather than her. "But, then, Hecate wasn't supposed to try to kill you, either, so we both did things that weren't supposed to happen." He shifted almost minutely away from her before the motion made him wince, one hand darting over to clench into the fabric of his pants just above his bloodied knee, face contorting into a brief rictus of agony. He sucked in another sharp breath, his eyes squeezed shut, and the boy genius was wracked with another set of tremors that Holly was helpless to stop.

Artemis's left hand tapped fast against his thigh, the speed at a frantic rate but the pattern strict and orderly- one-two-three-four-five, pause, one-two-three-four-five, pause, one-two-three-four-five... His right hand clenched helplessly in the fabric of his pants again, shaking hard just above the horrible injury, trembling in time with his harsh, rough breaths. His spine contorted, his chest heaved, and when his eyes rolled back into his head, Holly took action without a single thought towards the consequences. Foaly had said to use magic if his life was in danger, and, by the looks of it, his life was in danger.

She deftly reached out to flatten the flailing boy's limbs to the ground, holding him down by the arms- his left leg had been reduced to periodic jerks, while his right was too weak to do anything more than twitch. "Damn it," she muttered as Artemis gave a particularly hard jerk, leaving her struggling to even keep him down. How was she supposed to heal him if he was like this? "Keep still!" she pleaded, but if Artemis was even coherent enough to understand her now, which she doubted, there was no way he was in control enough to follow the order.

Sure enough, his only response was to stammer out, "F-f-five," through chattering teeth, and then, again, and before Holly knew it, he was chanting the number in a low mantra, and even if it calmed him, it only made her panic worse.

"D'Arvit," she panted, and, by sheer instinct, tried to channel a few sparks into his system to relax him. Artemis bucked and gasped at influx, flailing escalating with such violence she was almost hit in the head, and it was only then that she remembered the reasoning behind the ban on magic.

Shit! Magic won't calm him down- it'll do the opposite!

Forgoing trying to help him relax, Holly just turned all of her attention directly on to his injury. The pale, pale bone was still visible, the black cloth of his pants was soaked and dripping, and the injury was not something she could simply close and be done with. To reattach the shards of bone together, the separate pieces into one- it would take skill, time, and sheer power that she simply didn't have.

Not to mention I'd probably kill him with all that magic if he's reacting so badly now to just this little!

Swearing again, Holly maneuvered around so she could reach the injury, still fighting to hold Artemis down with one hand while reaching out the other to touch his knee. The reaction was immediate and violent; he jerked and gasped, the breath sucked in through clenched teeth and the motion an erratic arc of his fist that nearly clipped Holly on the head. Ignoring the blow, Holly curled her hand into a loose grip over the limb and focused on using her magic to coax the bone to move back to where it was supposed to be. The process was as painless as she could make it but by the time she could no longer see harsh white, a sweat had broken out over Artemis's forehead and he was biting his tongue so hard, there was a thin line of blood trailing from his mouth.

Thank the gods he's unconscious now... if he's this bad from me healing him, I don't want to see him if I had to do this while he was awake.

Holly ceased the flow of magic the moment the bone was back underneath skin. Any more, and she doubted the negative reaction it garnered would be worth the benefits, and by this point she would just be starting a job she wouldn't be able to finish, anyway. Artemis bucked and shuddered under her hands again, even as she curled her hand around the tears in his skin, sealing the wound with nothing more than a precious few sparks- ones that made the boy under her shudder and cough despite their few number and healing purpose.

Artemis and Holly shivered together, the human from the physical, the elf, more from the mental turmoil that had hit her as suddenly as Artemis's convulsions had hit him. She withdrew her shaking hands and dropped back on the ground- abruptly overwhelmed.

Now that the surge of adrenaline had worn off, and Holly turned to look at Artemis again, she was struck by a sense of despair. Artemis's physical injuries had served as a catalyst for what had just happened, yes- but she had no doubt that if had been spurred on by the Anexche and Atlantis. And those had been ongoing for months.

How on earth had she been so blind to something like this?

Now that she was actually looking at him, the fact that something was wrong was horribly obvious. He'd lost weight, clothes clearly several sizes too big, his hands boney, cheeks gaunt, the circles under his eyes pronounced. For a boy who was normally unhealthily pale, Artemis had gone paper white, his skin chilled nearly beyond what could be attributable to the wintery temperature, but even in sleep he wasn't still; he shook and jerked and trembled, hands twitching in what she was sure were hidden patterns of five.

Splayed out spreadeagled along the road like that, his left leg painted a virulent red, wholly unwell and sick, it was impossible for her to understand that they had just missed this. His state now had not popped up unawares; it had been a long time in coming and they had all been there every step of the way. They just hadn't noticed anything was wrong- Artemis's spiraling descent into madness had been nothing more than a worry niggling at the back of her mind, if that.

Artemis twitched again, and Holly shut her eyes rather than stare at the obvious signs of suffering before her. Obvious signs she never should've missed, that she couldn't imagine how she had- that left her roiling in guilt and remorse.

I'm sorry, Artemis... I'm so sorry I missed this. I let you down. I- what kind of friend AM I?

For Holly knew, without a doubt, that if it had been her in his position, he would've known something was wrong in a minute.

It was with a heavy heart that she finally turned back to finish the mind wipes, guilt weighing on her mind and regret on her heart.

Artemis inhaled and exhaled five times before he opened his eyes.

The nest of fours weighed uncomfortably in the back of his head, making him want to squirm and struggle until they were gone, and the thought of the army he'd fought just to get in control of his own body still being inside of him made him want to vomit. He nixed such thoughts firmly (they're a delusion, nothing more than a delusion) and instead tried to just take deep, meditative breaths, and relax.

He took a slow analysis of his body to find that the pain had eased somewhat. although, perhaps a more accurate word would be changed, not eased. Rather than a horrible, perpetual burning sensation, now it felt more like a deep-seated ache. But the level of pain itself had not decreased; it was only barely within his ability to remain in control and not descend into an anguished haze, and he clenched his teeth to hold in a moan.

So... someone must've healed me. But not all the way.

...Holly.

His insides twisted at the name, and his thoughts turned dark and guilt-ridden as they shifted onto what had happened.

I almost- no. HECATE almost-

But it doesn't matter. Hecate, Orion, me- we're all the same. Just different sides of the same coin. If Hecate almost... that means, somewhere in me, the impulse, or urge, or simply the very thought, perhaps- it exists.

And, then, Stop over-thinking it! Orion wants to take Holly out to live in a bivouac until the sun sets on their blissful happiness, and I certainly have never wanted that! Just because Hecate tried to kill her- that doesn't mean I'd ever do the same.

Then, perhaps the most morbid thought of all- Aren't you in the past to do just that?

He shivered.

Artemis opened his eyes, because he just wanted to stop thinking and the distraction promised by looking around and analyzing was a sure way to get that. Vision returned to reveal a heavily overcast sky, the same dreary grey that had cloaked London for his entire time in the past. Several more dead leaves danced across his line of sight, the thinnest strands of twigs binding together papery sheets of cellulose together that he was sure would disintegrate under even the lightest touch.

So horribly fragile- just as everything seemed now, in this deadened world he had returned to wreck.

So very, very breakable...

Shaking his head, trying to clear any such thoughts from it and just focus on something, anything else, Artemis worked an arm under himself to push himself at least partially upright. His new position afforded him the sight of a rural, country road, coated with layers of brown, undisturbed leaves and damp moss and grass. Frost glistened along the green, and the sight of it made him suddenly realize just how cold it was, and he raised one stiff arm to pull his jacket tighter around himself.

On the other side of the road was a nondescript beige van. It was hard to make the comparison, but he thought the tinted windows and proportions matched the one in which Orion had had a little chat with Nikolai in. It was sitting at an angle, more edging over the lane lines than parked neatly on the shoulder, and one tire was flat. He could see a shadow moving about inside from through the dark windows, though just who or what it was was indiscernible.

Artemis frowned. Last he remembered, Hecate had been in control, the Russians had been incapacitated, and Holly had been in the process of mind wiping them. Since the knife Hecate had had was nowhere in sight, nor was he faced with the sight of Holly dead on the ground (and he winced internally at the very thought), obviously, he had gotten back in control in time.

So what on earth was going on? Where was Holly?

And why do you care? Why are you worried about her rather than yourself? Didn't you come back to get rid of her and the rest of her kind from your life for good?

Once again, Artemis found himself without an answer.

Standing up was an ordeal, but not more so than mulling over the thorny problem that desperately deserved an answer that he could not give. Finding his balance was even harder, but any distraction was welcome, and Artemis wavered and swayed for a good five seconds before he had finally managed to hold himself upright on his right leg. Clearly, his broken leg had not been fully healed at all, and if the fact that it could support his weight no better than a broken twig wasn't enough indication of that, then the enormous exertion to remain upright through the continuous of shockwaves of pain was.

Hobbling forward was another matter entirely, and he ended up stumbling forward in a rolling gait that took him barely an inch before moving was taken entirely out of the picture. If he tried to take a single step Artemis had a distinct feeling that whatever work Holly had done on his leg was not going to hold, and since he rather preferred being conscious and coherent to not, he was going to have to settle for just standing here. He craned his neck, struggling to see more of just what was going on in the van, before the door opened and there stood the answer to all his questions.

Holly hopped the distance to the ground with her back to him, revealing the Russian driver and his passenger both unconscious in their seats. The elf appeared unscathed, even as he raked his eyes over her form in search of any sign, no matter how minute, that she might be unwell. The powerful wave of sheer relief that washed over him left him almost short of breath, and, stunned by its intensity, and he was left frozen to stare as Holly pushed the door shut, took a deep breath, then turned around.

She stopped moving the moment her eyes caught his. Gold and blue widened in surprise- pure, open, honest surprise, and Artemis found himself, for one of the first times in his life, caught off guard. After everything Hecate and the voice had said, drilled into him, tried to make him believe, to see her just standing there looking at him without any ill intent, her features not tainted with malice or dislike, left him reeling.

He didn't know have the slightest idea of how to react. Artemis just stared, open-mouthed, at the elf before him, realizing somewhere in the back of his mind this was the first time he and Holly were honestly face-to-face, no ulterior motives involved, in months. After the images Hecate and the voice had built up in his mind, seeing the diminutive elf just looking at him, just looking at him- it could almost be considered a massive let down, if the knot in chest wasn't going steadily thicker by the second.

She rescued me from the Russians. She healed me after I tried to kill her. Twice. She could've easily killed me, even left me to die out here, many times.

...Is it possible...?

"Artemis-..."

She looked, and sounded, concerned. Worried. Anxious. For him.

Concerned for my wellbeing, worried about me- ME!

The horror was undeniable now.

Seeing that look in her eyes, such honest concern, it sparked anger within him, and he crossed his arms roughly as if that could hide the growing ball of unease in his chest. "Artemis?" he quoted, and it took every bit of strength he had to make the word drip with sarcasm, to even say the word at all when all he wanted to do was just close his eyes and disappear. "How do you know that's who I am? You're just going to assume that I am, even though Hecate's tried to kill you twice now?"

Please. Get angry with me. Argue. Yell. Do SOMETHING, just stop looking at me like that- like you're sorry or worried.

Please don't tell me I was wrong.

Holly's eyes did narrow, and her stance did stiffen. Her surprise vanished to be replaced by a hard stare, one that looked so natural in his own blue eye and so unfamiliar in her usually warm gold one. "What does it matter to you?" she challenged back, leaning back against the car, one hand moving to quite pointedly rest on her Neutrino. "Didn't you come back here to get rid of us in the first place?"

He frowned. The question felt like a stinging insult, if a deserved one, and he wondered why. Rather than answer to it, he just met her stare with one of his own and continued on with his previous train of thought. "Test me. This time, more thoroughly. You shouldn't just blindly trust me."

"And I asked you why it mattered to you. If you're Artemis, the only reason you're standing here right now is because you wanted to get rid of us. So why does the method matter- death by Hecate, death by time paradox- still leaves me just as dead."

The thought made him wince again, and he closed his eyes, turning his head away and giving it a mute shake. I never wanted you to get hurt... I just wanted my family to be safe...

"...Just do it."

Holly stayed silent now, and Artemis just waited, his heart in his throat.

I'm giving her no reason to be kind to me now, if she even had one before. If what the voice told me really is true, she has no reason to placate me now. I have nothing to offer them, if that is the case, nothing at all. If what the voice said is true... she will just kill me and be done with it.

He waited for the telltale sound of her drawing out her Neutrino. For him to hear soft click as she put the settings on lethal, the slight whirring sounds as the weapon charged up a shot powerful enough to kill, the absence of sound but the brief moment of heat felt as she fired.

Instead, there was nothing.

And finally, she spoke.

"What's the number a fairy calls in an emergency?"

Artemis blinked.

The question was so unexpected, so out of the left field that his mind was momentarily wiped blank. He stared at her in surprise, and Holly just shrugged, her own expression carefully controlled and just the slightest bit tainted with suspicion. "I told you- uh, Artemis, anyway- once. He would remember it. If you're Hecate, though, there's no reason you would know it."

Artemis did remember it, of course, but answering her question and proving his identity suddenly took second place to the memories such a simple, inconsequential question had dragged up.

She'd told it to him in a different time, when things were much different than now but not necessarily simpler. When he hadn't known what was going on, who he could trust- even who Holly was. When he'd just been a possibly amnesiac human running for his life from mythical monsters with a fairy he couldn't remember, but who claimed to know him his only chance of survival.

They'd saved each other, then, yes, but Artemis had no doubt that Holly would've survived without him there. It hadn't been just his plan that got them out of the theme park death trap. In fact, he'd been more of a dead weight, forcing her to slow down and deal with a human far more trouble than he was worth when the slightest mistake could mean her death.

She had risked her own life to save his.

And, in the end, if it weren't for Butler and Mulch, we would've died anyway. They risked themselves to save us, too.

Three people he'd been told were conspiring against him- out to kill him, even.

But they had risked themselves to save him.

"Are you going to answer?" Holly gripped her gun now, expression very clearly distrustful and suspicious, and Artemis was jolted out of the memories again to a steadily worsening reality- and a steadily growing horror.

"Nine zero nine," he breathed numbly. "...Nine zero nine. That's the answer."

Holly didn't loosen her grip on her gun, but she did nod slightly, and Artemis realized, for the first time, that without a constant voice there to tell him what to do, he could no longer even attempt to justify his actions.

My motivation... what happened to it? Where did it go?

What am I?

"The first time paradox we caused- what was it?"

He turned his attention back to Holly, who seemed to be just spouting out whatever came to mind, and the question was easy enough to answer- but the memories it dragged up, again, left him speechless.

Hybras. Limbo. Demons. Holly was killed. Holly was killed, and she trusted me to save her- and I did.

They're not the only ones who risked themselves to save me... I once did that for them, too.

That time seemed a world away. That time when he had trusted them, been willing to risk everything for their sake- it was so foreign to him now, wholly not understandable, ridiculous, even- he was an entirely different person back then. And that person was one with confidants, friends, people who cared about him- and the only reason he didn't have those things now was because he didn't want to believe that he did.

I still don't know where the voice, Hecate, or Orion came from. I don't know where these number compulsions came from. I can't explain how it was able to instruct me to create that machine. But... regardless... I think that... that...

I may have been wrong.

"T-technically speaking," he whispered, trembling now, his voice hoarse as he spoke to ward off the undeniable, "your question is impossible to answer, because you phrased it in a chronological sense. This world and H-H-Hybras don't run on parallel, comparable time scales; I can't t-tell you which one occurred first. But, I believe you a-asking about our t-time in Hybras, when I... when I... when I b-brought you back to life."

Holly blinked in surprise- but then, but then, she smiled. It was a small, grim thing, more of a tense relief than expression of genuine joy, but it was a smile nonetheless, and she dropped her weapon back into its holster in a gesture of trust that left him dumbfounded. "Well, I guess you are Artemis, then," she said softly. "It's... nice to finally see you again."

He just stared at her.

When he didn't reply, Holly shifted awkwardly before gesturing for him to stop standing. "Well, Artemis, sit down. Quickly. I don't want to risk healing anything else right now, certainly not anything caused by you aggravating your injuries, and we have to get moving soon, anyway."

Numbly, Artemis did as asked. Though, he more fell than sat down, his legs feeling as if they had turned to jelly, his feet sliding out from under him on the slippery leaves. His energy went with the realization that he just might be truly, horribly wrong, and he fell onto his back in a deep, boneless exhaustion that left him too tired to even want to move.

The fast motion, the thumping of his head against the ground, it stirred something uncomfortable and almost malignant in the base of his stomach, and he felt his insides shift nauseatingly in time with the pulse in his head. He shut his eyes and breathed, willing the feeling to go away, and the nausea did manage to abate slightly even if his headache didn't calm in the slightest.

The slow returns of the sickness that had plagued him for months now left him in an even worse mood, and he frowned deeply at the sound of Holly approaching him. "...We don't have much time," she began eventually, almost hesitantly, as if she wasn't sure what to say. "The time tunnel closes in eight hours, and we're not even in Ireland yet. I did a minor mindwipe on the Russians and slashed one of their tires; that, combined with the damage Hecate did to them, should hopefully make them think they just crashed their car. They won't even remember you trying to intimidate them last night. We don't have time to make this look more convincing because we need to be out of here before they wake up. We're going to fly back to your house, you on my moonbelt."

It occurred to Artemis that there were a dozen and one reasons he should be protesting this- or even doing something other than lying here obediently- but he only opened his mouth once he felt small fingers wrap around his wrist, waving his other hand vaguely in a gesture to stop. "Don't feel very well," he mumbled, quite sure that flying would not agree with his roiling stomach, but was surprised when Holly's grip loosened on his wrist in response. He cracked open his eyes to see her shifting uncomfortably and looking away, her small hand now uncertain.

"...I'm sorry about that," she finally said softly, her features colored with honest regret. "Foaly warned me that using magic on you was a bad idea, but... I didn't know what else to do. I thought that doing nothing would be worse... who knows, maybe it would have been." She shrugged minutely before turning back to face him resolutely, a determined mask in place but her guilt still discernible. "I'm sorry. But there's not any other option here. We have to get moving. I know it'll be miserable, but... just try and endure it, okay?"

Artemis frowned now, the unusual reply doing more than enough to draw him out of his stew of self-pity and guilt. "Wait," he commanded. "Holly."

The elf stopped and looked back down at him, a little impatient now. "Artemis, we don't have time to waste-"

"What do you mean Foaly warned you not to use magic on me?"

Thoughts of a fairy conspiracy against him began stirring in the back of his mind again, paranoia and nests of fours binding together to create a formidable enemy once again- but Holly did not react as if he was accusing her of something, or some secret had been found out, or as if she had said something she should not. No; the regret already on her face multiplied into full-blown guilt and she built her lip in an uncharacteristic display of sympathy, mismatched eyes darkening in what he thought might almost be pain.

"Oh... that's right. You don't know about the-" She cut herself off before she could finish the sentence, and Artemis pushed himself up onto one elbow now, the presence of a possible answer giving him more energy than he'd had in what felt like a long while.

"The what, Holly?"

"I..."

"The what, Holly?!"

The elf paused again, her indecision clear, before a firm- and sympathetic- determination took over her features, and she reached down to grab his wrist again. "I'll explain on the way back to Ireland." She fastened a cuff around his wrist that linked him to her belt with quick, practiced movements, Artemis giving only token protests.

I shouldn't be letting her do this... I SHOULDN'T want to go back without having changed this, I shouldn't, but...

He felt as if, until now, his whole world had been cloaked in fever and paranoia- and that cloak had suddenly been lifted. All the countless times Holly had saved his life came rushing back, the times when he had trusted his life with her without a second thought, and she had never let him down, how she was his first real friend- and others, too, how Butler would never turn his back on him, not even when it meant his life, how all the people he was supposed to distrust were his closest friends.

How all the people he was trying to take out of his life for good were his friends, and the only reasons he had to be suspicious of them were a disease without origin and a suspiciously fast descent into madness.

I don't know what to believe anymore.

He let her secure his arm to her waist, activate her wings, and take off without a single protest.