A/N – It's been forever and my only excuse is I've become obsessed with Psych. I've watched the entire show (5 seasons) since my last update. But, my goal is to have another chapter finished by the end of the week so I can update this for you again next week! Cross your fingers! Also, I hope you're all sticking with me after the last chapter. Love is meant to be worked for. Jolu fans understand that better than most!

Chapter 20 – Three Weeks Later

Lulu smiled as a cool breeze blew across her face as she sat outside. It was rare that she let herself smile, but a perfect late summer day when she could feel the first effects of fall was too good to not smile. The only thing that would have made it better was if Johnny was there with her.

It had been three weeks since he had left her alone in Wyndamere. After he left, she thought she would cry, but she didn't. She wiped away the tears that had gathered in her eyes and went upstairs to take a bath. As she soaked in the tub, she realized that Johnny was probably right about them. They were a fantasy and as good as it was, it couldn't last. How could it when he never believed in happiness anyway?

Over the last three weeks, Lulu had gotten into a routine. She read books in the morning and rode horses in the afternoon. After dinner, she'd go to her room and watch some of the DVDs she had of old TV shows until she fell asleep. She still wasn't speaking to Nikolas because he was keeping her prisoner. She wanted to get back to her life before Logan, but Nikolas insisted it wasn't best for her and if she wasn't willing to stay there, the only other place to go was Shadybrook.

"Miss Lulu," Alfred said, surprising her.

"What are you doing out here?" Lulu wondered.

"Master Lucky is here to see you," Alfred replied.

"Oh, thanks," Lulu smiled.

She followed Alfred back inside, wondering what her other oppressive brother wanted to say to her. Lucky had stuck by Nikolas's decisions when she came back to town after her time on the run with Johnny, so they hadn't spoken in over a month.

"Hey, Lu," Lucky smiled, pulling her into a hug.

"Hi," Lulu muttered. "What's up?"

"Well, I spoke to Nikolas," Lucky started. "He says you seem better, but he still wants to keep you here. And I had a feeling that was the last thing you wanted."

"You're right about that," Lulu agreed.

"So, I convinced Nikolas that, if you want, you can come and live with me," Lucky suggested.

"Live with you?" Lulu repeated.

"Yeah," Lucky nodded. "He said you had mentioned getting your life back to the way it was, so I thought if you came and lived with me, then you could go back to work at Kelly's. Maybe even take a few classes at PCU again after all this time."

"School was never a big part of my life," Lulu noted.

"Well, you don't have to do that," Lucky conceded. "But I know you hate being out here."

"Look, Lucky, when I told Nikolas I wanted to get my life back, I meant my life," Lulu sighed. "That doesn't mean living with either one of you. It means being on my own."

"We're just scared it's too soon for that," Lucky explained.

"Why? Do you think if I'm left alone I'll off myself?" Lulu asked.

Lucky's eyes said it all and before he could say anything out loud, Lulu rolled her eyes and walked toward the stairs.

"Lulu!" Lucky called after her.

"I'm not interested in being watched by anyone all the time," Lulu replied. "I'd rather be out here and at least have some privacy."

"I'm sorry," Lucky offered.

"Just leave me alone," Lulu yelled back.

She ran upstairs to her room and slammed the door behind her. She was tired of being treated with kid gloves by everyone. She walked over to her bed and dove onto her pillow, sighing to herself. She heard something crinkle and looked down to see an envelope. Her heart stopped as she realized it was just like the one from before. She opened it, her hands shaking slightly.

Roses are red

Violets are blue

Soon you'll be dead

Sweet dreams, Lulu

Johnny walked into Shadybrook after getting a desperate message from Anthony's doctors. Apparently, his father's health was deteriorating so much that it wasn't likely he would live through the week. Johnny had a feeling he knew better, but he wanted to see for himself. Maybe if his father was dead, Johnny could be with Lulu. Not that she would ever take him back again.

He hadn't really slept in three weeks. He rarely ate, just enough to sustain himself. The only reason he did that was because he needed to be alive to protect Lulu in case Anthony should try to harm her. Though he imagined she didn't want his help. The only thoughts she probably had towards him anymore most likely involved means of torture. Or worse, maybe she didn't think about him at all.

But he sure thought about her.

At first it wasn't so bad. He took to drinking a lot and he could make himself numb to all the memories and feelings and thoughts. But after a few days, there was no amount of alcohol that could make him stop thinking of Lulu. Her eyes haunted him and a few times, when he looked quickly, he could swear he saw her face in the mirror standing behind him. He would turn around and there was nothing there. The room would be so empty and the aching, emptiness of his heart would rear its ugly head.

Once, last week, he had found some of her clothes mixed with his in the laundry the staff brought him. The bag of clothes he had brought back from their time on the run had finally made its way to the wash and there were several items of Lulu's that were sent upstairs to him. Johnny's first thought was to burn them, but he couldn't. He had so little to remember her by and though he knew it was stupid, he wanted to keep them for her. In case she was ever with him and in need of them again.

"Mr. Zacchara?" an orderly asked, peering into the room. "What are you doing in here?"

Johnny snapped out of his trance and looked around, realizing that instead of to his father's room, his feet had led him to Lulu's old room. It was still vacant and he was sitting on the bed where he used to hold Lulu as they learned all about each other. In the exact same spot where he was sitting the first time they kissed.

"I just needed to gather my thoughts," Johnny covered. "This room was empty, I didn't think anyone would mind."

"Of course not," the orderly muttered. "I was just surprised that's all."

"I should get to my father's room," Johnny noted, standing up.

"Have you seen Ms. Spencer?" the orderly wondered. "I mean, since she left here."

"Why do you ask?" Johnny countered.

"She was always nice," the orderly replied. "I remember seeing you visit her, so I thought maybe you knew how she was doing since she left the facility."

"She's much better," Johnny answered.

"That's nice," the orderly smiled. "I was hoping she was doing well. I liked her."

"Did you have a crush on my girlfriend?" Johnny questioned, glaring harshly at him. "Did you try to make small talk when you'd bring her meals and feel rejected every time she'd give you nothing more than a smile?"

"N-no, no, sir," the orderly stuttered.

"I bet you hated when I would come and you realized that she was happy with me and you never had a shot," Johnny smirked. "Lulu is with me, alright? You can never have her."

"Yes, okay," the orderly nodded. "I mean, I was never after her."

"Just get out of here," Johnny demanded.

The orderly practically ran out of the room and Johnny fell back onto the bed. He buried his face in his hands as he realized what he had just done. A harmless guy had asked about Lulu and Johnny had gone into a fit of jealous rage. He was insane. Not only was his behavior irrational, it was just wrong. Lulu wasn't with him anymore. And the random orderly probably had more of a chance with her in the future than Johnny did.

"Stop doing this to yourself, man," Johnny muttered to himself. "You blew it with her. You have to get over it. There's no way you'll get her back again."

Johnny sighed to himself and looked around. There were so many memories in that little room, but the one most clear was of him walking out on her the first time. Even then, he was in love with her. It broke his heart to leave her behind. And this time it was worse. He was more in love than before and she was practically a part of him.

"I value her safety so much because I love her so much," Johnny realized. "Yet what good is loving someone if you can't even tell them how you feel?"

Johnny looked up and saw a female patient peering in at him. The person looked concerned and Johnny rolled his eyes.

"I'm talking to myself in a building full of crazy people," Johnny sighed. "Maybe they should lock me up in here."

"They should!" the patient yelled. "You're nuts! You loved a girl, but you let her get away! Only a nut job would do that!"

Johnny nodded his agreement and started to say something but before he could, the patient walked into the room. She bypassed him and went straight over to the rocking chair. And kept yelling.

"How could you let the girl you loved go?" the patient yelled. "You got to hold her all the time and then you just gave up like you had no say!"

Johnny laughed once and stood, deciding it was best to go see his father. He couldn't stay in that place much longer.

As he got closer to his father's room, he stopped. He heard a voice inside that sounded familiar. He cautiously glanced inside and found the orderly from before in his father's room. Stilling himself, he decided to listen in on their conversation.

"He's definitely still with her, sir," the orderly said softly. "He just told me so."

"I can't believe he would be so reckless with her life," Anthony mused. "Maybe he is as crazy as me."

"He was very territorial," the orderly confirmed.

"Well, I was going to kill her anyway," Anthony shrugged. "Now I know it's necessary."

"Sir, what about your son?" the orderly wondered. "He'll surely know you did it."

"Not if you keep doing your job, he won't," Anthony replied. "You just keep forging all my tests and making them say I'm very sick. And I'll keep babbling like a lunatic."

Johnny's first instinct was to go in the room and shoot them both, but he knew that was pointless. That would only land him in jail and with his luck, his father would find a way to get to Lulu from beyond the grave. He needed a plan and he needed one fast.

The only problem was, the only person he trusted to stand with him against his father no matter what was locked away on an island and probably hated his guts.

Lulu had been on her guard for the last twenty-four hours since finding the note. She hadn't bothered to tell Nikolas, assuming he simply wouldn't believe her. She considered contacting Johnny, but decided that she'd rather face Anthony than talk to him just yet. So, the entire day since finding the second note, she'd been walking with her back to walls and peering around every corner. Her brother's stupid castle was really not a good place to be with someone who wanted her dead possibly on the loose.

She crept up the stairs carefully, ready to take a quick shower and go to bed. She eased down the hallway and turned her back to her bedroom door. She looked around and quickly entered the room. When the shadow of a someone standing in the middle of her room came into her vision, she opened her mouth to scream. But before she could get it out, he rushed over and covered her mouth.

"It's just me," he whispered, releasing her mouth.

"What the hell are you doing here, Johnny?" Lulu demanded.