Twenty

Confession

Nasuada was up before dawn. Unable to find sleep, she paid a visit to the infirmary. In the background, hidden from view, she sense the four elves that had promised to watch out for her. Although after Arya's display of honesty, she wasn't too confident.

When she asked how Murtagh was faring, the head healer just shook her head. "We had a disturbance last night."

Nasuada frowned. "And what was amiss?" Garth brushed against her calves.

The healer's weathered face wrinkled into a rumpled scowl. "The dragon. Excuse me ma'am but I don't like having dragons on my ward." Garth hissed. "Pardon me. But milady, honestly, Thorn frightens the other patients. And when my assistants are not wetting themselves, they are tripping over gargantuan claws and limbs!" She pointed to the corner of the ward that was segregated by several curtain sheets. "We are hoping to return him to privet quarters tonight, if he continues improvement."

"He couldn't have healed that fast," Nasuada said. "King Orrin himself said there was enough lead in his blood to kill him several times."

"It is no bluff," the healer said stiffly. "Rider Murtagh should not be alive. From what His Majesty explained to me, Murtagh's body is doing everything it can to stay alive, even if it means temporarily adapting to the poison."

Nasuada looked at the big bulge in the sheet curtains. She was itching to talk to him. "If you do move him back to privet quarters, then by no means are you to neglect him."

"Of course not."

"I would like to speak with him," she said. "Is he well enough?"

"He goes in and out of sleep." The healer looked her over suspiciously. "Angela says that you are close. If I may ask, is it true?"

The question caught Nasuada off guard, mostly because of Angela, who had been gone that first week. "Angela?"

"Yes, you know, the witch."

Nasuada's face hardened. "You shouldn't believe everything you hear," Nasuada told her sternly. "Angela is…well, she's Angela. And I don't need rumors floating around about something…like this!" She was so angry she could hardly talk.

The healer cringed. "If you say so, but King Orrin seemed to agree so I thought—"

Nasuada had stormed off, with Garth in her wake, before she lost her temper. She left without saying hello to Murtagh. By chance, on her way back to office, Orrin stopped her.

"I have been meaning to talk to you," he said.

Nasuada tried not to glare. "Do you mind explaining why you 'seemed to agree' with Angela that I am having a love affair with Murtagh?"

Orrin gave her a funny look. "First of all Nasuada, you must be married to have an affair, and secondly, you really must find a hobby before that temper gets the best of you."

She ignored the advice. "The head healer said that you seemed to agree with Angela—"

"Seemed to," Orrin corrected. "I did not say anything that actually indicated that I concur. She must have assumed that I agreed, which I do, but I did not say anything."

"You agree?"

Orrin laughed. "It's engraved in your face, dear, in big, bold letters. Everyone who knows you personally knows it."

"Very funny," Nasuada hissed. "But this is not about my feelings. This is about the Varden's feelings toward the matter."

"Well, I don't see anyone rioting."

"My council…they'd go ballistic on me. You saw how those ugly vultures tried to persuade me to hang him."

"It's nothing you can't handle. If it really bothers you, think what would your father say."

Nasuada snorted. "He'd say something like, 'Nasuada, you stay away from those boys. The only thing they're interested in is getting under you're skirt!'" she said in a deep voice, shaking her finger, imitating her father. Then a sort of sad, empty feeling came over her. She missed her father dearly. "No, I don't think he would have agreed. No matter who it was."

"He's your father," Orrin said. "He's supposed to tell you that. My advice to you is the longer you try to cover it up, the farther rumors will spread, and the more the public will nag you about it."

Nasuada looked at him for a moment. "This is awkward," she declared.

"Love is very awkward."

"Not that, you. You preach love and science better than you preach war. Why is that you never take myadvice?"

"I dotake your advice. I only discard about half of it."

Nasuada rolled her eyes. "Well, since we're swapping counsel here, I think you, your royal Kingliness, need to get your majestic rear out of that lab and convince those silly nobles to help. Or order them to join you. You're a king take advantage of that power."

"We will discuss my Kingly power over the nobles after we talk about this wedding," Orrin said narrowly. "And perhaps we can talk about your manners too."

Garth nibbled at her heals and Nasuada scooped him up. "What wedding?"

"Katrina and Roran's. That's what I wanted to talk to you about. Roran is a hero for slaying the Twins, and Katrina for surviving the Ra'zac. Are you going to have a feast in honor of their wedding? Because this would be the perfect occasion to brighten broken spirits, and I could use this opportunity to call a conference to my courtiers."

Nasuada gave him a sour look that could skin a mountain. "I'm not paying for a giant feast so that you can lure your fish into your net."

"You're going to exclude non-Varden members?"

"I will pay for the Varden's expenses. If you want your nobles to join me, you may calculate the exact amount of extra food that will needed and provide it. Otherwise, it will be a privet celebration."

"Good," Orrin said. "Now, about your notion of getting my majestic rear out of—"

But Nasuada was already gone.

---

That evening, near bedtime, Nasuada found herself in a debate with Arya about training.

"You need proper training," she told Nasuada. "You and Garth won't last long in battle without it."

"I'm plenty trained," Nasuada said smoothly, coldly, not meeting Arya's eyes (she was still very angry with her). "And I've survived plenty battles, thank you very much."

"And what of magic? You are as vulnerable as a baby to even the weakest magicians."

"Again," Nasuada said louder, "I have survived plenty of battles without magic. I am not going to waste my time flying around that stupid forest while the Varden is leaderless. End of story." She saw a muscle in Arya's slender twitch, and felt a wave of satisfaction. "Besides, I can't use magic. I am a fine archer and I use my blade rather well. Unlike Eragon I grew up in battle. The Varden will get by without me endulging in frivolous exercises." Nasuada was very proud of her boldness. Since she was still angry with Arya, she went on, "Nor will I become your pawn."

"Pawn!"

"Why did you think I refused in the first place?" Nasuada asked. "Eragon has become your pawn. No matter what you say or do, he is your pawn. He is in debt to you for Saphira. That's what you told him, isn't it? And now you are going to try and play that petty game with me. Right?"

When Arya said nothing, she went on in a cold, numbing voice. "Rider or not, Arya, I will not be controlled by neither friend nor enemy. Tell that to your Queen."

---

In Nasuada's opinion, she had not only offended Arya, but she had also won the battle. Ajihad had warned her that Saphira's Rider would be heavily influenced by the elves. Nasuada on the other hand, knew better than that. The elves would have to deal with her independence for without the efforts of the Varden and Brom, most of the Forsworn would still be running amuck.

The elves could be arrogant and refuse to help the Varden at all, but it would not matter much. The Varden had survived without their help. Even the dwarves were more obliging! And also, the elves could not afford not to help. If Alagaesia's only resistant was obliderated into nothingness, then Galbatorix would move onto the elves and eventually destroy them as well.

Arya played her game admirably, but Nasuada played better.

She veered out of the back gates to the infirmary. The building had once been an old warehouse, later converted to a giant infirmary. The wards, as big as they were, were still crowded with the fallen from their most recent battle.

Nasuada noticed that the curtains in the corner were gone, and Murtagh and Thorn were nowhere to be seen. She tracked down the head healer.

"We moved him back to his room," the healer told her. "Thorn was too much on the other patients, and I didn't want anyone to commit a hate crime. It was for the best. For everyone."

"As long as you don't forget about him," Nasuada said. "We are depending on his strength."

"Of course."

From the infirmary, Nasuada went to Murtagh's privet quarters. She knocked once, and Thorn said, You can come in. You might be good for him. He's in an awefully gloomy mood.

First tell me about your outburst last night, Nasuada said, before opening the door.

The door rattled with a low, menacing growl. Garth squirmed uneasily in her arms, hissing at the door. The monster played trickery with me.

Monster?

Galbatorix.

Dread washed over Nasuada. Galbatorix!

He took advantage of Murtagh's weakened state, and kept his presence and Murtagh's torment from me. Then he pried into Murtagh's mind and made nasty threats.

Why wasn't I told about this?


Because I don't talk to people who don't matter, Thorn said. And those healers would have said he was hallucinating. Let Murtagh tell you about it. It'll get the weight off his chest and maybe he'll sleep tonight.

Nasuada opened the door and peered in. There was only a small candle for light. Thorn moved out of the way so that she could get to the bed. Murtagh lay belly first, face buried in his arms and pillows. He did not move when Nasuada sat on the bed's edge and laid a hand gently on his shoulder. He was still very warm, though the fever seemed to have weakened. "I heard you had some excitement last nigh." She was careful to speak kindly. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"I have created a terrible enemy for us all," he mumbled into the pillows.

"Galbatorix was always a terrible enemy," she said.

Murtagh lifted his face out of the pillows. Nasuada thought he resembled death. His face was thin and pale, and his skin a sour yellow. He would not meet her gaze, not with those sickly eyes. "He is angry with me."

Furious, said Thorn.

"I am no longer his puppet. And I used the cloaking spell, his own invention, and stole Garth's egg. The gaurds could not even see me. I used it to fool your men too, and the Ra'zac."

Nasuada tried to smile. "You didn't think that he would be dancing through the meadows with joy, did you?"

He swallowed hard. "He is looking for your name, your true name. And Eragon's too."

Fear clutched at her entrails. They burned like she had just run too far too fast. "That is to be expected," she said. Expressing her inner fear would not comfort him.

Murtagh looked at her like he was trying to see through her. "You don't understand. It was an accident that I was freed. Galbatorix made the mistake of telling me my true names to give my magic extra strength, but he was also careful to keep power over me. If he does find your name, he will not confess it to you."

"True," Nasuada said. "But Arya once told me that finding true names was a tricky business. It will take him awhile. And should something become of me, Eragon will take over the Varden."

He sprang upward. "He's looking for Eragon's too!" Then he said, "Nothing will become of you. I don't know how, but I will not allow it. He will not thwart me so easily."

Unsure of what to say, Nasauda smiled. "Just rest for now."

As she stood up, Murtagh gently grabbed her hand. "You don't have to go," he said quietly, pulling her back onto the comforter.

"I have to get to bed."

Looked around and shrugged. "You are in bed." Garth chirped from his spot at the end of the bed. He was curled up near the bedpost. "See? Garth agrees with me."

Nasuada smiled, thinking of what Orrin and the healers had told her. "Well," she said, sliding under the covers. "I suppose I could stay for a little while."

A/N: A terribly long, halfway pointless chapter. I didn't get everything I wanted out of it…this last scene had much more to it when I originally plotted.

Ugh…oh well. As long as I can move on to the chapter, it will have to suffice. Sorry for the wait, but it's taken me awhile to work out some future ideas (which I think you'll be pleased with). Thanks so much reviewers! You guys rock like Jimmy Hendrix!