AN: Is there such a thing as "fluff before the storm"? Or maybe that should be "fluff before the angst"... Whatever it is, that's what was happening last chapter :P. This chapter is leading up to the storm (or the angst, depending on your point of view).
MyLittleElphie: the fact that you called me 'our dear Queenie' left me in stitches. :P
*tackles Wicked4Life in a massive huge gigantic bear hug* MY WICKED WITCH! YOU'RE BACK! YOU'RE ALIVE! *squeezes the life out of you* Honestly, though, I've really missed you! You've been gone for so long! The other day I was re-reading some Frex Hunters fics and they reminded me of my early days on fanfiction - you know, you, BlueD, Failey (who is now Queen Faeley) and me plotting and coming up with strange things to do to Frex in a one-shot, and making up songs... Of course studying is important and I don't blame you for not having much time to read and/or review, but could you try to just drop in and say hi (or 'Boo' :P) every now and then? Just a single word, to let me know you're still alive? :)
Chapter 21. The funeral
The moment they set foot in the church, Elphaba's eyes fell on the frail girl in the wheelchair a few metres away.
"Nessa!" she gasped and before any of her friends could stop her, she stumbled towards her sister, not caring at all about the fact that she wasn't supposed to put pressure on the torn ligaments in her ankle.
Nessa's head immediately snapped up and the moment she laid eyes on her sister, she burst into tears. "Fabala!"
They all but fell into each other's arms, Nessa sobbing uncontrollably, Elphaba with tears of her own standing in her eyes.
"I'm so sorry!" Nessa wept. "Fabala, I'm so sorry for everything I said, and for telling Father… it's all my fault! It's not your fault, it's mine! I let this happen… I did this – Boq is dead because of me!" She hiccupped. "I'm so sorry, I was so awful to you… Can you ever forgive me?"
"Of course." Elphaba hugged her sister tightly. "Of course I'll forgive you, Nessie. But only if you'll forgive me, too."
That only made Nessa cry harder. She clung to her sister desperately, sobbing her heart out into Elphaba's shoulder.
When the green girl pulled away, Galinda came forward to hug Nessarose as well. "We're so sorry about Boq, Nessa," she said.
Nessa sniffled. "Thank you."
"Where is your father?" asked Fiyero, looking around the church suspiciously.
Nessa wiped her tears away, a hard look coming over her face. "I don't know. And I don't care, either." Her eyes flamed, much like Elphaba's often did when she was angry. "He let this happen," she said in a low voice. "There are many things I should have done differently; but he's the one who tried to be an ally to the enemy. He's the one who allowed them to attack Shiz. It's as much his fault that Boq died as it is the Glikkuns, or mine." She looked up at Elphaba sadly. "I haven't spoken a single word to him since your letter came," she said in a small voice. "I've missed you so much, Fabala. I've been so lonely…"
Elphaba hugged her again. "You don't have to be alone anymore," she promised her little sister.
Nessa looked at them all, eyes red and puffy. "Are you all okay?" she asked softly. "I mean…"
Galinda softened and squeezed Nessa's hand. "We're fine," she assured the younger girl. "Or, well, not fine," she corrected herself with a glance over her shoulder at the others, "but getting there."
Fresh tears welled up in Nessa's eyes. "I'm so glad that you're all alive!" she sniffled. "But…"
"I know," Galinda said sympathetically as she wrapped her arms around Nessa once more. "I know."
Frex did not arrive until the last moment, and he did not approach Nessa or even seek her out in the crowd. Instead, he stood back, watching the coffin with dry eyes as people spoke, commemorated Boq or recited poems and verses. Boq's family was up front, his mother crying all the time, younger children clinging to her skirts. Her husband tried to comfort her, but it was clear that he was very emotional himself. Watching them just increased Elphaba's feelings of guilt.
She swallowed. They had lost their eldest son… their older brother. The mother was inconsolable, and Elphaba felt like her heart was being torn in two. No matter what everyone said, she really was responsible for this. At least partly.
She knew that Galinda was right. She knew that it was the Glikkuns' fault the attack on Shiz had happened. It was her father's fault, partly. It was Nessa's fault, too, just a little bit, because she had written that letter to Frex. Elphaba knew now that she wasn't the only one to blame… but she was still to blame. The truth was that if she had stayed away from Fiyero, if she had been stronger, Boq and all those other students wouldn't be dead right now.
She felt like she couldn't breathe – the guilt was crushing her. She couldn't stand here and look at Boq's family mourning his death like this. His death that she had caused.
"Hey," whispered Fiyero, slipping his fingers into hers and squeezing them softly. "Don't."
"Don't what?" She was still staring at Boq's family, looking – and feeling – miserable.
Fiyero placed his fingers under her chin and turned her head, so that she was looking at him. "Don't look," he said softly. "I know it's awful, but they'll be okay eventually, Fae. Just like Mum and Cyara and I will be okay. It's horrible, everything that's happened, but we have to look forward and move on."
She winced slightly, shaking her head violently as she pulled away from him. He, however, pulled her back, wrapping his arm around her waist and trapping her against his side.
She struggled and squirmed. "Let me go!"
"No."
She could see Nessa over his shoulder, tears streaming down her face as Galinda tried to comfort her, but the blonde's eyes were filled with tears as well. Elphaba imagined faces like those, like her sister's face and the faces of Boq's family, on people all over Oz. People who had lost their friend or family member in the explosions at Shiz. The guilt was overwhelming.
Somehow, Fiyero could see it in her face; because he tilted her chin up again and looked into her eyes.
"Fae," he said softly. "Don't do this."
She sniffled. "Do what?"
"Blaming yourself." Upon her surprised look, he shook his head. "Don't bother denying it, I can see it in your face. Stop it."
She bit her lip. "But –"
"No." He held her even closer and she buried her face in his neck. "It wasn't your fault, Elphaba. It wasn't. The only people who are to blame are the Glikkuns, and that's the end of it. What's happened has happened and we can't change that anymore." He pressed his cheek to her hair. "Stop feeling guilty about this," he begged her softly. "Please. If not for yourself, then for me. I can't stand seeing you like this."
She just cried silently into his shoulder, clinging to him. Galinda and Nessa were both crying as well, and Gazilon was trying to comfort them.
The coffin was carried out of the church and into the graveyard. It was a sad and quiet procession, and soft sniffles could be heard when the coffin was lowered into the earth. When the people started leaving, Elphaba slowly let go of Fiyero to hug her sister again, who was crying inconsolably.
Suddenly, she could feel Gazilon and Galinda tense beside her, and she detached herself from Nessa. When she turned around, her father was standing there.
She slowly rose to her full height, eyes never leaving his. He just stood there, feet planted a little apart, hands behind his back, chin up and an icy cold look in his eyes.
They looked at each other for a long while, neither of them moving. Fiyero made his way over to Elphaba's side, taking her hand to show her that he was there for her. She appreciated his and her friends' presence more than ever now. No matter how composed and calm she seemed on the outside, it felt like her heart was in her throat.
"Elphaba," Frex said finally, and his voice was as cold as his eyes.
She nodded curtly. "Father."
He looked her over with contempt, eyes sliding towards Galinda and Gazilon for a moment, then moving over Fiyero and Nessa before coming back to his eldest daughter.
He clenched his jaw. "You," he hissed in a low voice. "You have some nerve, showing up here."
Fiyero's grip on her hand tightened and a soft squeak escaped Galinda's lips, but Elphaba stood her ground.
"Boq was our friend," she said simply. "And I didn't want Nessa to be alone for this."
"Alone?" he spat. "She was not alone. She had me."
Elphaba held her father's gaze, anger burning underneath her calm façade. "Exactly."
Frex' eyes narrowed. He was clearly fuming with rage, but he, too, kept his composure. "You," he said in a neutral voice, "are nothing more than a disgrace, a curse to everyone around her. You crippled your sister…"
Elphaba winced, feeling as if he had slapped her.
"…you killed your own mother…"
She closed her eyes for a moment, pained.
"…and now," he said with a false smile that didn't reach his eyes, "now you even managed to murder your fellow students. You murdered your sister's boyfriend. Well done, Elphaba." He locked eyes with her, and when he saw the guilt in her eyes, she could in return see the triumph in his own. "Well done."
Nessa wheeled forward. "It wasn't her fault."
"No, it wasn't," Fiyero agreed, moving closer to Elphaba's side. He was daring Frex with the look on his face. "It was yours."
Frex didn't pull a muscle. Instead, his gaze drifted towards Gazilon.
"And you," he said, nearly spitting the words out, disgust clearly audible in his voice and written all over his face. "From her, I had expected this. Ever since she was conceived, she's never done a single thing the way she was supposed to. She is nothing more than a living and breathing disappointment." Fiyero clenched his fists at that, and from the corner of his eyes he could see the way Nessa set her jaw and the way Galinda's eyes flared with anger; but none of them spoke a word. Now was not the time for that.
"But you?" Frex continued, looking Gazilon over contemptuously. "I had expected better of you, boy. Your parents raised you right, didn't they? I thought you, at least, would be strong enough to handle her."
Fiyero bristled at that – no-one should be 'handling' Elphaba, or any other person, for that matter – and Gazilon frowned.
"I don't 'handle' people," he said crossly, obviously as annoyed with Frex' wording as Fiyero was. "And I never agreed with my parents, anyway. I did what I did because I wanted Elphaba to be happy, and I still stand by that. We have done nothing wrong. You have."
"This conversation is over," said Frex curtly. "Nessa, come with me."
The girl folded her arms. "No."
Frex blinked, clearly taken aback by that. "No?" he echoed incredulously.
"No," Nessa said again. "Not until you acknowledge your mistakes and tell Elphaba and Gazilon that you're sorry."
Frex snorted.
"You can have us both," said Nessa firmly, "or you won't have us at all. Elphaba is your daughter, too, Father, and I refuse to let you treat her the way I've let you treat her for too long already. If you turn your back on her, you turn your back on me."
Frex hesitated. He studied Elphaba, noticing the way she cradled her bad arm with one hand and the limp she had, as well as the stitches in her head. He noticed Fiyero's injuries, Galinda and Nessa's emotional state. Gazilon was staring back at him defiantly, but that boy was really the only challenge among them.
Frex pondered on an idea for a few moments. He wanted his favourite daughter back, and the only way to do that seemed to be to apologise to Elphaba and talk things out with her; and so that was what he would do.
He smiled at Nessa as genuinely as he could manage. "You're right, my darling," he agreed, much to everyone's surprise.
He looked at Elphaba, forcing his face into a mask of friendliness. "Elphaba," he said graciously, "why don't you and your friends go and freshen up a bit, and then come by the mansion later this afternoon? We could have tea, and we'll talk. I think we do need to do that – talk. Your sister is right." He nearly choked on the words, but he said them. "I want to make it up to you."
Elphaba looked at him, clearly suspicious; but Nessa seemed to be delighted at this turn of events, Galinda was smiling, and even Gazilon seemed to melt a little. Maybe this change of heart was genuine. He hadn't said he would apologise, or change his mind; but she could grasp the fact that he was willing to try to get along with her if that meant he would have Nessa back.
"Alright," she agreed finally. "We'll come by around four o'clock."
Frex' fake smile widened. "Excellent. I will see you then." He moved behind Nessa's chair to push her away. "Are you happy, my sweet girl?"
"Yes, Father," she replied, smiling. "Thank you." She was glad her father would talk to Elphaba. Maybe they could be a real, happy family after all.
Frex pushed Nessa's chair away from the graveyard and helped her into the carriage before sitting down across from her. The carriage started moving and Nessa looked out of the window, lost in thought.
Frex made a mental list of the things he would need to arrange before tea time came and his newly invited guests would arrive. He could pull it off, he was sure of that. He was confident that he could do it without Nessa getting suspicious, too. After all, Elphaba and Fiyero had both suffered head injuries; it wouldn't be that strange if they would suddenly collapse, seize, and die. He'd use different poisons for both of them; an acute one for the prince, and a slow, preferably painful, one for Elphaba. He was sure that if he bribed the local medic, he could get him to tell everyone the cause of death was brain trauma, or internal bleeding, or something like that. Frex wouldn't leave a trace, Nessa would be with him, and that disgusting piece of filth that was supposed to be his eldest daughter would be out of his way.
He smiled triumphantly to himself, knowing he had already won. Elphaba wasn't the only one who was good at acting, and Frex would be even better. They would never know what had hit them.
There. The Queen of Cliffies strikes again. Mwahahahahaha! *lightning strikes behind me as I throw my arms in the air and cackle (you know, like my profile pic only with me cackling)*