DISCLAIMER: All credit to JK Rowling
AN. Oh, wow. I am just blown away by the response to this story. I even had someone say i converted them to Harry/Hermione! which is huge. I know someone mentioned that they seem a little "muggley" (is that a word?) and yeah, that's true. The truth is, i'm so focused on the relationship and character development side of things, i kind of forget their magic, ha ha. I'm trying to work on that, i promise.
I really like this chapter, i really feel for Hermione. But i just thought that it would be a very real concern of mine if i was in her position. Let me know what you think!
Chapter Twenty-One
"Will you relax?"
Harry turned around, startled to see Hermione watching him from their bedroom doorway, and smiled sheepishly.
"Sorry, I guess I'm just nervous."
"You're going to be fine," she assured him gently. "You have the qualifications and a great sob story. They'll have to give you the job."
Harry chuckled. "I don't know if the sob story has the same ring to it if I can't mention the evil wizard aspect."
"Murdered parents and raised by emotionally abusive aunt and uncle?" Hermione retorted. "It still works, hon. Trust me."
It was July, a few days before Harry's birthday and he was about to go to a job interview for a position as a social worker in London. He and Hermione had both graduated from university the month before, although Hermione wasn't looking for a teaching job until after the baby was born.
"Ok, I'd better go," he said, kissing Hermione goodbye and then bending to kiss her bump.
"Bye, kiddo. Be good for Mummy today, summer isn't the best time to have an internal heater."
Hermione laughed as he stood up and headed for the door, and then gasped.
"Harry?"
He turned back immediately, alarmed at her tone. "What?"
"I think... I think that was a kick."
Harry crossed the room in a single stride and knelt down by her stomach. "Really? Are you sure?"
His question was answered as he felt definitive movement against his hand. "Blimey!"
"Yeah, I'm sure," she replied, completely in awe by the feeling of the baby moving inside.
"Wow, that's a good kick," Harry said excitedly, beaming up at her.
Hermione nodded, a lump in her throat. "I'm pretty sure that's Morse code for 'Good Luck, Daddy'," she giggled and Harry kissed her stomach again.
"Thanks, bubba. And thanks, Mummy," he grinned. "Say hi to the girls for me today."
Hermione nodded, she had plans to have lunch with Parvati and Lavender in a few hours.
"I will. I was thinking I might do some shopping after too."
Harry grinned. "Birthday present shopping?"
"I'm giving you a child," Hermione said pointedly. "Happy birthday."
"Mione, I don't think you can use that when you're due in November," Harry replied.
"I can do whatever I want," she replied stubbornly and Harry grinned again.
"Fair enough. Bye, sweet girl."
"Bye. Good luck," she kissed him one final time before he left the room.
The baby kicked again as she distantly heard the front door close behind Harry and Hermione laughed to herself as she began crying.
"Damn hormones," she muttered to herself, summoning the tissue box to her from the bedside table.
Lavender and Parvati both cried too, as Hermione told them about the baby kicking that morning. They'd finished lunch and were sitting outside in the sun, just enjoying a cold drink.
"It's so beautiful," Lavender sighed, eyeing Hermione's stomach.
"Harry must be so happy," Parvati smiled at Hermione who nodded happily.
"He is. He's so excited about everything. He's been reading all the pregnancy and parenting books, and he talks to the baby every night," she informed them and both girls sighed.
"How the hell did you end up with the perfect guy?" Lavender demanded and Hermione laughed.
"Lav, as much as I love Harry, he's not perfect."
"Ok, maybe he's not perfect," Lavender conceded. "But he's the guy every girl dreams about."
Hermione grinned. "He does have the whole knight-in-shining-armour thing, doesn't he?"
Parvati giggled as she nodded. "Yeah. Plus, the fact that his biggest thrill is you and this baby? Wow. Any guy I've dated in the last two years either doesn't want children, or doesn't want them for a long time. And here's Harry, who's only ever wanted children and a family."
"You're so lucky, Mione. I mean, my mum always told me the person I marry should be my best friend, but you guys did that first," Lavender sighed.
"Yes, saving the world is quite the bonding experience," Hermione laughed.
"Harry is just so much like his parents," Parvati added and Hermione frowned, puzzled.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, think about it. His dad died to try and protect them from You-Know-Who, his mum literally died for Harry. I mean, every girl hopes the man they love would die for her, but Harry actually would."
Lavender nodded in agreement. "Oh yeah, in a heartbeat. He almost died saving the world, like every year, but he wouldn't even think about sacrificing himself if you or the baby were in danger. You never thought of that?"
Hermione's mouth had gone very dry. In truth, she hadn't thought about it, she'd been so wrapped up in finishing university and planning for the baby; she'd never really thought about how much Harry was like Lily and James when it came to protecting the people he loved most.
"Hermione? Are you okay?" Parvati frowned in concern, noting how pale Hermione had turned.
Hermione swallowed hard and then shook her head. "Sorry, I'm not really feeling well," she apologised faintly.
"Maybe you should go home and lie down?" Lavender suggested immediately, her Healer training kicking in.
"Yeah, I might do that. Sorry to spoil the day," she apologised again but Parvati waved her away.
"Don't be silly, you're pregnant! And it's crazy hot in here. Do you need us to help you get home, or are you okay to Apparate by yourself?" she asked but Hermione shook her head.
"No, I'm fine. Thanks."
She bid Parvati and Lavender goodbye before Disapparating to the house. When she entered, Harry and Sirius were playing chess in the living room.
"Hey, you're home early," Harry said in surprise as she entered, glancing at his watch to see it was only just before three o'clock.
Hermione managed a weak smile. "The heat got to me, I think. How'd the interview go?"
"Good, I think. Should hear in a couple of days," he replied, capturing one of Sirius' pawns.
"Great. I'm going to go lie down," she informed them and headed upstairs.
The second she entered their bedroom, Hermione burst into tears. She couldn't get Parvati and Lavender's words out of her head, how she was so 'lucky' because her husband would quite happily die for his family, if the situation required. Hermione knew it was true, and honestly, the idea terrified her. She'd seen Harry come close to death many times before, but never before had his potential death left her alone with a baby. The mere idea of life without Harry, not to mention a life where his death was in an effort to protect her and their child, made Hermione want to vomit.
The worst part was, she couldn't tell this to Harry. She knew that if she told him what the girls had said and her sudden fears on the subject, Harry would feel incredibly guilty for making her worry, and she couldn't do that to him. There was also the factor that if Hermione mentioned the thought aloud, it might come true. On some level she knew that idea was ridiculous, but her pregnancy hormones overruled her brain and so she decided not to say anything. This would be the first thing she had purposely kept from Harry since they'd first begun dating, and the idea of that made her feel guilty and horrible.
"Ugh! I am so glad I wasn't heavily pregnant with Teddy during the summer," Tonks groaned when she and Remus returned home from their day out with Teddy. "Mione must be dying!"
"Yeah, she's not feeling too great today," Harry replied. "But she's asleep at the moment, so I think that helps."
Remus sighed as he entered the room after putting Teddy to bed. "I wish I could go to sleep as quickly as Teddy. Especially in this heat."
"The joy of being three," Sirius grinned.
It was so warm that no one really felt like doing anything, not even eating. Tonks eventually turned on the television and they watched in silence. It was only about seven o'clock when Tonks abruptly muted the television and stared up at the ceiling.
"Do you hear something?" she frowned.
"Teddy?" Remus suggested, listening intently.
There was no sound at all for a moment, before Harry heard it, a distant, muffled scream.
"Mione," he said hastily, jumping up and taking the stairs three at a time.
He burst through the bedroom door, and dimly registered Hermione curled up on the bed, screaming in her sleep, before he was by her side and gently shaking her awake.
"Mione? Mione?"
With a start and a huge gulp of air, Hermione bolted upright, wide-eyed and looking around the room, panicked. As her eyes found Harry, she burst into tears and sank against him.
"Hey, you're okay," he murmured soothingly, rubbing the small of her back. "You're okay, I'm here."
Hermione took deep breaths, still gulping for air and shaking frantically.
"What happened, hon?" he asked her worriedly and Hermione shook her head.
"Nightmare," she choked out, still clinging to Harry tightly.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
Hermione shook her head again, but Harry understood. He'd had enough nightmares of his own to know talking about it afterwards was not pleasant.
"Come on, you should eat something," he said gently, helping her up.
She nodded, still shaken by what she'd seen. "What time is it?"
"About seven o'clock. You've been asleep for awhile."
When they got downstairs, Harry went to the kitchen to make her some dinner, and Hermione shakily entered the living room and sat next to Tonks on the lounge.
"Are you okay?" she asked her in concern, and Hermione smiled faintly.
"Nightmare. Sorry, guys," she apologised.
Tonks shuddered. "Don't worry about it, Mione. I had one last week where I was drowning in cockroaches... ugh."
Hermione sighed lightly and leaned her head back, resting her hands on her stomach. The baby kicked gently in return and Hermione's eyes filled with tears once again.
"Hermione?"
She looked up to find Sirius watching her anxiously. "The baby's kicking," she explained and Sirius' eyes lit up.
"No way!"
Hermione actually laughed and grabbed his hand to help him feel. "Feel that?"
Sirius shook his head in wonder. "That's crazy. It feels like it was only yesterday Lily was showing us Harry kicking, remember Moony?"
Remus nodded with a soft smile on his face. "Oh yeah. James used to say he was dancing."
"Which is ironic because neither James or Harry can dance," Sirius grinned.
That was the first night when the dreams began. Every night without fail, Hermione would enter a dream world, where she was forced to watch Harry die to sacrifice himself for Hermione and their child, until she was awoken by Harry, still screaming in horror. She couldn't even take a potion for a dreamless sleep, because she couldn't be a hundred per cent sure it would have no effect on the baby.
Everyone in the house was frantic with worry about her, Harry especially, and most because Hermione couldn't (or wouldn't) tell him what was troubling her, and they had always told each other everything.
Each night, Harry, Sirius, Remus and Tonks would all drift off to sleep tentatively, waiting for the moment when the screams would begin. It was extremely disconcerting, Sirius and Remus agreed, how one could actually get used to be awoken by screams of horror. Hermione for her part, felt awful for making everyone worry, but was powerless to stop the dreams or the effect they had on her. The dreams were incredibly vivid, and they soon began to haunt Hermione even in her waking hours.
In the first few weeks, Hermione could attribute her lack of sleep, appetite and pale and wan manner to the heat of summer. But once the beginning of September came and went, and Harry realised this had been occurring every night for just over a month, he decided he couldn't wait for Hermione to come to him anymore and turned to Sirius.
"I don't know what to do anymore, she won't talk to me," he said helplessly to his godfather.
Sirius looked at Harry pityingly, knowing it was extra hard because Harry did have a tendency to need to fix everything. Knowing he couldn't help his own wife, was not easy.
"Have you tried asking her what the nightmares are about?" Sirius asked, knowing it was a stupid question, but not knowing what else to say.
Harry nodded miserably. "Yeah, she won't tell me. She just says it's nothing."
There was a long pause before inspiration struck Sirius. "Hey, what about Dumbledore?"
Harry frowned slightly. "What about him?"
Their extended family knew vaguely what was happening with Hermione, of course, because they would have been idiots not to notice the difference from the happily blossoming pregnant Hermione that had been around since the beginning of summer.
"Well, you always said talking to Dumbledore helped you, didn't it?" Sirius asked.
Harry nodded slowly, although he was pretty sure defeating Voldemort and nightmares of a young mother-to-be were very different areas; and the latter one that Dumbledore didn't have a lot of experience in.
Sirius picked up on that, though. "I'm not saying Dumbledore will be able to fix it," he added hastily. "But, it might help Hermione to talk to someone, with a bit of distance involved. It can't hurt right?"
"Hermione won't go to him, though. She's nothing but stubborn," Harry shook his head and Sirius grinned.
"Like her husband," he teased lightly and Harry glowered slightly at him.
"I'll tell you what, I'll write to Dumbledore and tell him the idea; and he can write to Hermione, asking to meet her for some reason."
"Set her up?" Harry frowned for a moment. He didn't really like the idea of tricking his pregnant wife, but then realised it was worth it if it meant the nightmares would stop.
"Ok, I'll keep Hermione busy for a few moments," Harry offered immediately, standing up. "Thanks, Sirius."
Sirius smiled. "Don't worry about it."
Harry hurried up the stairs, looking for his wife, and found her on the third floor, helping Tonks give Teddy his bath.
"Hey guys," he greeted them.
"Wotcher, Harry! How was work?" Tonks asked him.
Harry smiled, despite his worry over Hermione, he had to admit he loved his job. It seemed a lifetime ago he had been worrying over the interview; and now he'd been there for two weeks. He was meeting the greatest little kids, most of whom had been through so much in their short lives, and some of them reminding Harry of himself in his childhood.
"Good. How are you, hon?" he asked Hermione and she gave a small smile that didn't quite reach her eyes.
"Fine. Bubba's been sleeping most of the day, I think."
"'Arry!" Teddy cried loudly, noticing his godfather was ignoring him and splashing impatiently to get his attention.
Harry laughed. "Hey, Teddy. Enjoying your bath?"
"Bubbles!" Teddy replied, which Harry took as a yes.
Hermione actually laughed slightly, and Harry held out a hand to help his heavily pregnant wife to her feet.
She was seven months along now, and despite her pale, tired appearance, Harry still thought she was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen.
"Did you find a home for Ben?" Hermione asked as they headed slowly downstairs.
Harry smiled. Ben was a six year old boy who'd been in eight different foster homes in the past year, as his mother was dead and his father in prison. He'd met the small boy on his very first day, and had been trying to find another home for him.
"I think so, yeah. I found a really good application, and they've got other kids Ben's age too, so he should fit in nicely. I'm going to call them tomorrow and try and set up an interview so they can meet."
After dinner that night, Hermione insisted on cleaning the kitchen as her back was aching slightly and standing helped. She'd just magically cleaned all the dishes and levitated them into the cupboard when Harry called out to her, coming into the room.
"What is it?" she asked in confusion, seeing a letter in Harry's hand.
"This just came for you," he explained, handing it to her.
Hermione opened it and recognised Dumbledore's handwriting.
"Dear Hermione,
I was wondering whether it would be convenient for you to come to Hogwarts tomorrow? There is a matter that has arisen I would most like to get your opinion on, and I'm afraid it cannot wait until Friday night dinner. Anytime is satisfactory, and I'll have a member of staff meet you in the Entrance Hall to escort you to my office.
Yours most sincerely,
Albus Dumbledore."
"That's odd... what could be so important it can't wait til the end of the week?" Hermione frowned.
Harry shrugged. "Knowing Dumbledore, it could be anything. Will you go?"
Hermione shrugged. "It's not like I have anything else to do," she smiled faintly.
She sent back the owl with a reply, confirming she was available and said she'd be there around ten am. She still had absolutely no idea what Dumbledore so urgently needed to discuss with her, but figured at least it gave her an excuse to go back to Hogwarts.
It was a very surreal experience for Hermione to walk slowly up to the castle the next day. Although she had been back since leaving, it was completely different returning seven months pregnant, and realising that in eleven years, the child within her would be attending as a student. It was slightly creepy to think about. When Hermione entered the Entrance Hall, she looked around for a staff member to escort her up to Dumbledore's office. She had expected it to most likely be Minerva or Remus, possibly Professor Flitwick. She had never in a million years expected that it would be Snape waiting for her.
"Hi, Professor," she smiled politely in greeting, hiding her surprise.
"Hermione," he replied civilly, barely able to contain his own surprise at her strained appearance, and remarking inwardly to himself that it was no wonder Potter, Lupin and Black were so worried about her.
"How are you feeling?" he asked as they climbed up the marble staircase, thinking he should at least make polite conversation, as it was a long trip to the Headmaster's office.
"Tired," Hermione admitted, but then she smiled slightly. "I guess it doesn't help that Hogwarts wasn't really designed for women who are seven months pregnant," she sighed.
They made awkward conversation until they reached Dumbledore's office, and then Snape knocked, pushing the door open when Dumbledore called out "Enter."
"Ah, Severus! And Hermione," he smiled, standing up and coming around the desk to greet her.
"How are you?" he asked her gently, so sincerely and with that familiar penetrating gaze Harry talked about so often.
Hermione opened her mouth to respond with the usual, "Fine, thank you"; but met Dumbledore's light blue gaze, that were looking at her as though they knew everything she was feeling; and startled everyone, even herself, by bursting into tears.
Snape made a hasty exit, but Dumbledore stepped forward and comforted her until she had regained control over herself, before leading her to one of the comfy armchairs Hermione was sure were not usually in the office, but conjured for her own comfort.
"Sorry," she apologised as Dumbledore handed her a tissue box, but he shook his head gently.
"I daresay you have absolutely nothing to apologise for. Is there anything you'd like to talk about?"
Hermione hesitated, but the words were already in her head before she could refuse.
"It's Harry."
Dumbledore looked surprised and confused by her answer, but she hastily shook her head. "No, it's not. It's more me. It's... I don't know," she admitted wearily, taking a deep breath and closing her eyes for a moment, trying to think where to begin.
"During the summer, I was having lunch with Lavender and Parvati," she began finally. "And they said..."
Her voice caught in her throat as she recalled the conversation that had started it all. "They said I was so lucky, because Harry was just like his parents."
A stray tear ran down her pale cheek as she continued. "Because if... if he could... if he had to... he'd do what his mum and dad did. He'd die to protect his family."
Dumbledore's light blue eyes suddenly gleamed with understanding, but he didn't say anything, which made it easier for Hermione to continue.
"Ever since I met Harry, that's all I've ever seen him do," she said shakily. "Every single year, put himself in more and more danger to save the world," she half-laughed.
"I watched him almost die to save a little girl from being hit by that car, and he didn't even know her," she whispered.
Dumbledore remembered Harry's accident and Hermione's grief-stricken reaction afterwards.
"And I know that he would do what his mother did in a heartbeat," Hermione sighed softly. "Because I know Harry, he doesn't even think about doing whatever he needs to do to stop the people he loves from being hurt. But..."
"The nightmares?" Dumbledore prodded gently.
Hermione nodded miserably. "I've been watching Harry die in my head every night for the past month," she admitted. "They feel so real..."
Dumbledore's heart ached for Hermione as he watched her. It was scary enough to be expecting your first child, not even considering when your husband did have a knack for near-death experiences.
"Have you talked to Harry about the dreams?" he asked her and she shook her head, smiling slightly.
"You know Harry. If I told him, he'd feel guilty like it was his fault I was having the dreams; and he'd just worry."
Dumbledore smiled back at her. "I think he's doing a very good job of worrying already," he chuckled and Hermione laughed.
"I hate making him worry, and a part of me knows it's stupid to worry about this when... Voldemort's gone. I watched him die! But that didn't stop Harry before he returned."
"Harry does make an unfortunate habit of being in the wrong place at the wrong time," Dumbledore agreed smiling. "But I don't agree that it's particularly 'stupid' to worry about this, even if Voldemort is gone. Especially because of Harry's past record. I do feel however, that you have nothing to worry about."
"You think?" Hermione asked tentatively.
"This baby, this family, is everything Harry's ever wanted in his life," Dumbledore said gently. "As much as he wants to, and will if the situation ever requires, protect you and your children from any harm; I don't see any reason why that protection should require his life as a sacrifice."
Hermione didn't seem convinced, but Dumbledore suspected why. "I know, given James and Lily's sacrifice, that might seem unrealistic. But the times are very different than they were when Harry was born. Firstly because Voldemort is gone. James and Lily had a wonderful home and a very strong and pure love, not dissimilar to that between Harry and yourself, although yours is with a much happier beginning and ending," he smiled.
"But during Voldemort's first reign, there was a lot of secrecy and distrust within the Wizarding community. The Order could only try to protect James and Lily from Voldemort, and Sirius was trying to do just that when he suggested making Pettigrew their Secret-Keeper. If, for any reason, there is any danger to you, Harry or your children, there is such a large group of people that love you all, and would never betray you for the world. You and Harry are most fortunate to have those you call family and your friends."
"I know," Hermione smiled. "Sirius and Remus in particular are so excited."
"I think they see this as a chance to help make up for the relationship they missed with Harry," Dumbledore agreed.
"Which is ridiculous, because they both mean everything to Harry. And me," she added, rolling her eyes.
Dumbledore seemed thoughtful. "I think perhaps, they're not attempting to reconcile the issue with Harry himself, but to James and Lily."
Hermione nodded, one hand rubbing her stomach as the baby gave one particularly sharp kick to her side.
"I wish Harry could have known them," she said sadly. "I mean... I feel like I do, because Sirius and Remus talk about them all the time... and I see so much in Harry that I just know has to come from them... but he doesn't see that. And now with the baby coming, I think he's really feeling that," she admitted.
Dumbledore was beaming at her as he nodded. "I think you're quite right."
Hermione talked more in the next two hours than she had in weeks as she and Dumbledore settled into his office for tea and cakes, for the first time in ages Hermione was properly hungry. She talked about everything, from Harry and the pregnancy to her mother- to whom she hadn't spoken to since she returned from their honeymoon, and more and more about her fears of being like her parents, and what her childhood had been like.
Dumbledore listened intently to everything she said, and gave great advice or comments on everything; they even talked about the events that had occurred during Hermione and Harry's own time at Hogwarts. He even told her what he'd only ever told Harry before, about his family's history and his past with Grindelwald. Hermione had had no clue of any of this, as Harry would never betray Dumbledore's confidence.
By the time Snape returned to escort her back down to the Entrance Hall just before two o'clock, Hermione felt like a huge weight had been lifted off her shoulders.
"I'd forgotten how many staircases there are here," she laughed slightly to Dumbledore as he helped her out of the chair.
Dumbledore's eyes twinkled. "Yes, staircases weren't designed for the ease of expectant mothers," he chuckled.
"I really can't wait until I can see my feet again," she admitted. "That's probably the thing I'm looking forward to most besides finally meeting Jamie, although Harry... oops!" she gasped, realising what she'd let slip and holding a hand over her mouth.
Dumbledore and Snape had both caught it, unfortunately. "Jamie?" Dumbledore repeated and Hermione grimaced slightly.
"Yeah... damn it, Harry's going to kill me," she sighed. Seeing their expectant faces she nodded. "Jamie... it's what Harry and I call the baby when... there's no one else around," she said sheepishly.
"Jamie," Dumbledore said again faintly and Hermione smiled, one hand on her bump and yet more tears in her eyes.
"Jamie. As in short for James Sirius," she admitted. "We're having a boy."
She wasn't the only with tears in her eyes as Dumbledore beamed and embraced her happily, whilst Snape stared in stunned silence, completely thrown that not only was there going to be another James Potter in the world, but he would also be named after Sirius Black.
"We wanted to put Remus in there somewhere too," Hermione confessed. "But Teddy's already got Remus as his second name, and three names seemed like a lot."
"I don't think Remus will mind," Dumbledore assured her. "Congratulations. I may have to change my bet," he added as an afterthought, and Hermione laughed.
"Well, I went seven months without letting it slip," she sighed.
"It won't leave this room," the Headmaster promised. "Nor will anything else."
Hermione smiled gratefully. "Thank you. For everything. I think I'm going to talk to Harry when he gets home," she said and Dumbledore nodded.
"He'll be relieved."
Hermione pecked the elderly man's cheek lightly, before saying goodbye and she and Snape left the office, Snape still completely in shock from what he'd heard.
When Harry got home that night, he was surprised when he reached the second floor and found Hermione standing in the doorway to their study, deep in thought.
"Uh, Mione? What are you doing, sweet girl?"
She jumped slightly and turned to face him.
"You're home!"
Harry was slightly worried by her relieved tone as he pulled her to him. "Yeah. Are you okay?"
"I need to talk to you," she said seriously, and Harry nodded immediately.
"Ok. But er- what were you doing a second ago?"
"Thinking we should really get a move on with the nursery," she admitted and Harry's spirit's brightened.
For the past month she'd been too tired and seemingly disinterested in the nursery or preparing for the baby's arrival, and Harry noted she seemed more like her old self as they went into their bedroom, closed the door and sat on the bed.
"What's going on, sweet girl?" he asked her gently, and Hermione took a deep breath, determined not to cry.
"My nightmares," she admitted.
"Ok."
"Remember the day that I had lunch with Lavender and Parvati?"
"Sure," Harry nodded cautiously. It was a day that stood out, not only because of his interview or their son's first kick, but because it was when this all started.
Slowly, Hermione told Harry everything she'd told Dumbledore about the nightmares and her fear of having to lose Harry in some noble attempt to protect her and their family from harm. As she'd predicted, Harry was horrified and guilt-stricken, but they talked it all out for a long time; before Harry gradually turned the conversation back to her heart-to-heart with Dumbledore.
"It really helped," she admitted. "I can see why you made it an annual event," she teased and Harry laughed, kissing her softly.
"I'm glad you're back," he murmured seriously to her. "I thought I was losing you there for awhile."
Hermione swallowed hard, a lump in her throat. "I'm sorry," she apologised, her voice quivering. "I was... scared. I don't want to lose you. Ever."
"You won't," Harry promised, drawing her to him.
It was only when Jamie landed a sharp kick to her kidney that Hermione remembered she had another confession to make.
"Oh by the way," she said slowly and Harry looked at her patiently.
"When I was talking to Dumbledore... I may have... accidentally referred to Jamie... as Jamie," she winced apologetically.
Harry laughed. "I knew you'd slip up!" he proclaimed and Hermione chuckled sheepishly.
"In my defence... I've had a very emotional day, and I've been kind of distracted recently. I washed my hair twice last night," she said pointedly.
Harry was still laughing, as Hermione rolled her eyes and patiently waited for him to calm down. It felt so good to be able to laugh again and be herself, feeling as though her nightmares had actually been banished. She felt as though she could look forward to the baby's arrival without fear that the beginning of their family would somehow lead to the end, like James and Lily before them.
"Anything else?" he asked her when he'd finally stopped laughing.
Hermione hesitated. "Sort of. Dumbledore told me... about his sister."
Harry nodded solemnly, his green eyes darkening for a moment. "It's sad, isn't it?"
"It's awful," Hermione corrected, almost in tears again at the mere thought of what Dumbledore had gone through. "He said... that you're the only one who really knows."
Harry nodded again. "Yeah. I think there's a few people who think they know something, but I, well we now, are the only ones who know the truth."
Hermione smiled slightly. "I think it's nice that he chose to confide in you alone. When did he tell you this?"
Harry tried to think back to the exact moment. "When it all came down to the Horcruxes and the Hallows. I promised I'd never say anything," he said almost apologetically but Hermione smiled.
"I get it."
"How did it come up?" he asked curiously.
Hermione paused for a moment. "I think... we were talking about my parents, and your parents... it just flowed. But it's just so sad, I mean... it's Dumbledore. You just see the type of person he is today, and... It feels like a different world, you know?"
"Well, he is nearly a hundred and twenty," Harry said reasonably. Then he jumped off the bed to help Hermione to her feet.
"Come on, show me what you were thinking for the nursery."
Hermione obeyed happily.