Chapter 21: Confusion

Author's note: Thank you for your continuous support! YOU ARE AMAZING! :D

Disclaimer: I do NOT own Artemis Fowl.

Addison lay in his bed, glaring at the ceiling, his arms spread out on the massive bed. Quaid had woken up not long after Isidore took control, and Oisin, the only alter that hadn't retreated to his room, had told him what happened before letting him go to his room. A tear slipped down Addison's right cheek. He didn't know what he wanted anymore. All he knew was that he was enraged to the point of insanity. He was so mad that he wanted to scream, he wanted to cry, he wanted to just let go all his raging emotions that were slowly tearing him to pieces.

She just tricked me. Why would she care? The mysterious alter clenched his fists, letting the silent tears stream relentlessly down his face. Addison's deep blue eyes shown with rage, with pain, with confusion, with sadness, all at once, all trying to force their way out of his quivering limbs. But the thought of hurting Holly again was horrible to Addison. Do I love her? She doesn't love me, so why should I? He saw her in his mind, her mismatched eyes full of truth. Addison closed his eyes, taking a deep, shaky breath.

And Artemis ... he doesn't care. Addison growled menacingly under his breath. I'm like their little puppet. His eyes snapped open, widening. How did I fall for that? They just want me to help cure Artemis, and then what? He and Holly can live happily ever after? He sneered in hate. They'll leave me in the dark to suffer, to burn. He reached up with his trembling hands, tugging at is dark, luscious hair. The pain distracted him, making it easier to hold back the scream boiling in his throat. He bit his bottom lip, sinking his sharp teeth into it.

Artemis thinks he's so perfect.

Artemis lay, stomach down, on his bed sobbing uncontrollably, the sound muffled by his pillow. How could she? He's a fool! His right cheek throbbed painfully, making it hard to think straight. He felt flat, lacking any energy to move. His pillow was wet with his salty tears. Artemis felt unbelievably alone, more alone than he had ever felt, not even having his bodyguard to comfort him. He felt broken, floating around in a void of nothing. He hadn't been in control for what felt like, to him, years. He wasn't sure if he wanted to. It would just be like always. He would have to lay there, stuck in a hospital bed. He felt like his friendship with Holly was slipping away, without her realising it.

Orion lay on his back on his bed, unable to sleep. He felt odd. He wasn't used to feeling so distraught, but right now, the feeling was stronger than ever. Addison has dug his claws into my sweet maiden, and now she is trapped under his spell! I must do something! But he couldn't, and he knew it. He sighed dramatically. Oh, my angel, I love you more than anything.

Oisin took a deep, long breath, rubbing his tired face. Why do they have to be this way? He had a feeling that Artemis and Addison weren't going to cooperate. Oisin wasn't usually pessimistic, but he was feeling so stressed from having to constantly restrain them from strangling each other to death.

Alistair blinked. He lay on his bed, propped up on his elbows, staring at the door of his room. He couldn't understand why Holly would kiss Addison, the bad guy, but wouldn't show him any affection. I may be slightly hormonal, but I have feelings too. Seriously, why do I have to be the jackass? Artemis and Addison are being the jackasses. Ugh. He knew he was just trying to distract himself from the anxiousness he was truly feeling.

Mane was fast asleep on his bed, curled up into a tight ball, too tired to do anything else.

Isidore had returned to his room when he appeared back in their mind-office. He was dreading the talk tomorrow. He couldn't imagine anything getting better. The problem is that Addison is still angry and confused. Isidore couldn't bring himself to hate Addison. He was scared of him, but he knew what it felt like being alone. That's just his way of masking it. Maybe the others don't truly understand because they have never felt that way … well, definitely not to the extent Addison, Quaid and I have.

Quaid lay on his couch, unable to keep his eyes open. His head hurt from Addison shoving his elbow into it when he had pulled him back into their mind-office. He didn't want to think. Every time he did, his head would protest, a stabbing pain encompassing his unfinished thoughts. He sighed. This is—ouch! Stupid hea—ah!

In the morning, Mane was the first one up. He always was. He rubbed his tired eyes as he settled down at the table. The silence was oddly peaceful. Mane just sat in the wooden chair, breathing slowly and deeply.

In. Out. In. Out.

I wonder how Artemis is going to act today. He looked so sad yesterday. Mane sighed. He hated the sad atmosphere in their mind-office. He could never escape it, no matter where he went. It was almost like a thick fog, virtually clogging his throat. He hated it, and Mane wasn't the one to hate things. He heard a door creak open behind him, and turned to see, much to his surprise, Isidore appear, smiling slightly when he saw Mane. Mane tried not to look too shocked as the boy came and sat next to him.

Isidore leaned his elbows on the table, cupping his cheeks. He stared at the blank screen. The two alters sat in silence for a calm moment, and then Isidore murmured, "Can you f-feel it too?"

Mane looked at him. Isidore glanced at him sideways, a small, sad smile on his face. "The s-sadness … it's everywhere."

Mane nodded, leaning his head on the table. "I thought I was the only one," he replied quietly, a very odd thing for Mane. "It's depressing."

Isidore nodded. He suddenly realised how much he wanted to speak, and who was a better person to speak to than Mane? "I just … I c-can't imagine Addison …"

"Cooperating?" Mane offered. Isidore nodded again.

"Yes. The thing is … I-I feel …" Isidore glanced at Mane, wondering what Mane would think of him if he continued his sentence. Mane smiled encouragingly, his blue eyes kind.

"What?" he asked.

Isidore hesitated. "I-I feel … sorry f-for him."

Mane frowned. "You mean Addison?" Isidore nodded, nervously searching his eyes.

"Why?" Mane asked innocently, genuinely interested in what Isidore thought.

Isidore looked back at the blank screen. "B-because … he just feels alone, a-and that's how he … p-protects himself. I know how it feels." He looked at Mane, his eyes almost begging him to understand. "It's … s-so h-horrible, Mane."

Mane looked down, his expression unreadable. He sighed, nodding his head. "I don't think Artemis understands that."

Isidore looked thoughtful. "I don't think he wants to admit it," he replied. Mane made a sound of agreement, running his hands through his midnight hair. They both turned around when they heard another door open. It was Oisin. He seemed pleased to find them together.

"Hey," Mane greeted nicely, waving. Isidore just smiled timidly.

"Hi," Oisin said, smiling as he settled down opposite them on the table. He suddenly heaved a sigh, chuckling nervously. "Oh, no."

Mane and Isidore—much to his immense surprise—laughed. "Oh, yes," Mane said, smiling at Oisin sympathetically.

"Good morning to you, fellow alters," Orion's voice sounded from behind them. They all mumbled their greetings as Orion sat down next to Oisin. He didn't seem as bright as usual. His eyes weren't shining and his smile looked strained. Oisin patted him on the back.

"Don't worry, Orion," he reassured. "Everything's going to work out fine."

"I hope so," Orion replied, oddly quiet.

Alistair was next to come out, his left eye bruised. He didn't say anything, feeling grumpy and sore. He sat down next to Isidore and leaned his forehead on the table, taking a deep breath. No one said anything, knowing it wouldn't help the situation.

Addison's eyes drifted open. He moaned and shifted, rolling onto his stomach and digging his face into the fluffy pillow. He froze, blinking his eyes as he remembered "the talk" he had to sit through. He sighed, lifting himself of the bed and running his hands through his messy hair, before approaching the door. He put his pale hand on the knob. This is utterly ridicules. Addison turned the handle, slipping slyly out of his room.

Everyone was already at the table. There were three chairs on each side of the table, and then one on each end. Artemis was sitting on one end of the table, looking very, very irritated. All the alters' heads shot to Addison. Addison put a smirk on his face, striding over to the table and settling into the chair on the opposite end of Artemis.

"So," Addison said sarcastically, crossing his arms over his chest. "What is the genius going to do? Hmm?"

Artemis glared at him, his deep blue eyes vicious. Isidore could feel his heart hammering violently against the wall of his chest. He looked at Mane beside him. His worried blue eyes were switching between Artemis and Addison. All the other alters were doing much the same as him.

"If you ever touch Holly like that again, I swear I'll …"

"Aww, what will you?" Addison asked, daring Artemis to snap. Artemis's face went red with anger, and he clenched his fists tightly under the table. Addison chuckled. "Oh, and by the way, genius, Holly is the one who kissed me. It really was divine."

"Shut up!" Artemis shrieked, making Isidore flinch in fright. He abruptly stood from his seat, his eyes full of rage, his teeth bared. Oisin stood up, pushing him back in his seat again.

"Can you two stop acting like children?" Oisin demanded, looking at Addison firmly, and then Artemis. Artemis shoved Oisin off, leaning back in his seat. Addison glanced at his nails nonchalantly, sighing melodramatically.

"I am merely telling the truth, nothing more, nothing less," he replied calmly, smirking sadistically at Artemis's deep red face.

Mane couldn't help himself. "Why can't you just get along with us?" he asked, looking at Addison in confusion. "What did we ever do to you?"

"You're all stupid," Addison retorted, looking up from his sharp nails. "You let people use you, play with you."

"They're not playing with us," Orion snapped, his eyes narrowed testily. "You're just jealous!"

Addison's expression abruptly became threatening. "I am not jealous," he said slowly, turning to glare at Orion. Orion gulped, his eyes widening in fright.

"Stop being so mean to everyone!" Alistair yelled, glowering at Addison.

"You just tease us because it makes you feel tough, don't you?" Quaid added, too angry to care about the reaction to his words. All the alters started yelling at once, insulting Addison and telling him he was heartless.

"STOP!" Oisin hollered at the top of his lungs, shocking all the alters into silence. Oisin had never felt so mad. He had dealt with it enough. He searched all of their faces, his breathing ragged, his fists clenched. "Stop being idiots and admit your faults! I'm not perfect!" He pointed to himself, his hand movements exaggerated. "None of us are!" Everyone just stared in shock, including Addison and Artemis.

"This is childish, and you all know it!" he yelled, and then he controlled himself again, speaking calmly. "Now, we are all going to listen to what everyone has to say. We are not going to judge them, and we are not going to interrupt. Does anyone not understand?" He looked around. No one moved a muscle.

"Good," Oisin said, settling back down in his seat. "Now, I'll start." Everyone just watched, still stunned by his outburst.

Thank you for reading! This ended up being a little longer than I expected, so the rest of this scene is going into next chapter. :D You are amazing!

Orion's mad! NAAAAWWWWW! :3 That little cutey! I JUST WANT TO HUG HIM!

... Okay, I think that just proved that I need a rest. Thanks again. :)