"How about here?" I said as I motioned to a restaurant in front of us. "It looks relatively empty."
"It looks like a fine place," she said. I pushed the door open. It was, in fact, relatively empty. There were only handful of other people there and I quickly saw that I didn't know any of them. I wasn't sure why I wanted this to be a secret, but for some reason I still didn't want it getting out that we were together. Probably because we weren't officially together.
We took our seats at a table against the wall. I hesitated for a moment between sitting next to her or sitting across from her and settled on across from her. If nothing else I needed to get used to the idea of actually looking at her. And I probably wouldn't be able to think straight if I was next to her. Not that I was really able to think straight across from her either.
"So," I said to break the silence after we ordered our food, "what, umm...what do you do in your spare time?" I started kicking myself. That was the best I could do? Even if I did want to know the answer, THAT was the best I could do?
"Sadly I have had very little spare time since I joined you," she said. "But I have always enjoyed spending time in nature. I find it very calming. What about you?"
"Oh, umm...nothing special. I like...I read a lot. Almost anything I can get my hands on. Mostly books on strategy though." I was nervously twiddling my thumbs under the table. Gods, I made myself sound so...boring. But I...didn't have any other hobbies. I was either reading or working. I had nothing else I could say.
"I have never been much of a reader. When I was younger I would always ask those who took care of me to read stories to me instead of reading them myself."
"Well you were a kid, right? I don't think that's so unusual."
"Perhaps," she said as our food arrived, "but I never made much of an effort to learn, either."
"So does that mean you...can't read?" She shook her head slightly.
"Not particularly well. I acquired a basic knowledge and then I simply...failed to practice for a very long time." She sounded ashamed of herself. I wondered if she was worried that maybe I would somehow think less of her for admitting that.
"Do you want me to maybe...teach you?" I asked. I hoped that I didn't sound like I was talking down to her. I definitely didn't want her to think I was trying to be patronizing.
"Oh, would you be willing to?" I took a brief glance up from my food and saw that she had a wide smile on her face. I looked back down at my food.
"O-of course I would," I said to the potatoes on my plate. "Would you mind showing me some of your favorite nature spots?"
"I would be more than happy to. Though in truth some of them would be difficult for a human to reach."
"Oh?"
"Yes. There is one I particularly enjoy that I reach by flying. A human would likely not have the endurance to climb as high as it is. It gives a clear view of the sky unimpeded by even a single tree." She sighed. "I do wish I could show it to you."
"Why can't you?" I said as I suddenly looked up. She had a wistful look on her face and she was looking up at the ceiling, although I imagined she was thinking of looking at the sky.
"As I said, it would be too difficult for a human to reach. Even one such as you." I had no idea what that meant. I didn't have exceptional endurance, so obviously there was no reason...I shook the thought away. I was letting myself get distracted.
"I wouldn't have to," I said. "You could just fly me up there!" She gave me a look that made me think she hadn't even considered the possibility.
"You...you are right," she said, "I likely could." She smiled. "We have even practiced once before." I felt myself blush a little at the memory.
"Y-yeah. So you can fly me up there, and while we're there I'll show you how to read. When...when we have some free time." Her smile widened.
"That would be wonderful."
"And we'll have a picnic while we're there. I...maybe I'll...even try making the food," I said with far less confidence than I had about asking to go in the first place.
"I would enjoy that very much," she said happily.
"Oh, don't say that until you've actually tasted it," I said.
"Hah, perhaps you are right. Still, I look forward to the day we are able to go together. It is, I believe, near to the capital of Ylisse, so when we make our eventual return there we may have our opportunity."
"I can't wait," I said. As I finished speaking I realized that not only had we just had a conversation, but I was...actually looking her in the eye. Not only that, but she was looking back at me. Unfortunately as soon as I realized that I coughed and looked down at my food. It was almost gone so I didn't really have an excuse to continue to do so. I finished it.
"Do you have anything to do once we depart from here?" I heard her ask.
"Tonight? No, I don't," I said. I took a breath and steeled myself, then looked back up. "Would you...maybe like to spend the rest of the evening together?" She wasn't looking at me now, she was staring at her own food. Even so I saw that she smiled again.
"I...was hoping you would ask. There is no way I would rather spend my evening." I felt a blush come on. Really? I knew she like spending time with me, but still.
"Umm...good. I'm glad." We lapsed into silence until she was done eating. I paid for the food and we saw ourselves out into the approaching night. Valm Harbor was big enough that they had lamps lighting the streets, so we didn't have to hurry to get back to the tavern for the night. It would likely be crowded for a while anyway. "Is there somewhere in particular you'd like to go?" I asked her as she started walking next to me.
"I'm unfamiliar with this town, so I do not."
"I'm not familiar with it either. How about we just pick a direction and go that way?"
"I will follow wherever you decide to lead," she said. So no pressure then.
I started walking in the direction of the water. It was a clear night and wasn't windy, so I hoped it would provide a decent view of the sea. Gods, it felt like so long since we'd come here across it. I'd never forget the battle that started the war. The sight of the ocean set ablaze as Walhart's ships burned. The screams of his soldiers as they tried desperately to abandon ship. Nearly getting caught in a blaze myself. Vaike's burns that didn't heal for weeks. All the rebels who...hadn't made it.
"Robin? Are you alright?" I pounded my forehead with the heel of my hand and shook my head.
"Sorry. Brought back some bad memories. Let's go." I decided that no good would come from running away, so I kept going towards the water. I wasn't even sure why the memories had suddenly arrived, but I wasn't going to let them get me down. We had won that battle and every battle after that, and we had liberated the continent.
"Robin, please slow down," said Tiki's voice from a few steps behind me. I realized that I was nearly jogging towards the docks. She was trying to keep pace with me, but I had longer legs than she did. I stopped and turned.
"Sorry again," I said. "Like I said, bad memories."
"Is it something you wish to share with me?" I wanted to say no, but another memory floated to the surface of my mind. One that was much more recent and more pleasant.
"If something should trouble you, please...feel free to speak to me about it."
"I'm...remembering a battle from the beginning of the war. Let's go somewhere more private," I said then immediately realized what I had said "oh, I mean...umm...not like..."
"I know what you mean," she said gently. It must have shown all over my face how bothered I was. We started walking in silence while I tried to calm myself down. We turned a corner and started walking down a smaller street than the one we had been on. It ran parallel to the docks and we got a mostly unimpeded view of the sea. I forced myself to look over that way every so often and managed to avoid dredging up those bad memories again. Eventually we reached a stretch of the docks that had no moored ships or sailors milling around. I walked to the end of a dock and sat down. Tiki sat next to me.
"For some reason when I looked out at the water I remembered the first battle of the war," I said without preamble. "I had to sacrifice half of our ships to destroy Walhart's navy. Most of our people got off of them in time but...I couldn't save everyone. I know it was never going to be realistic to think that I could win a war without casualties, but I still wonder if...if I could have done better. Saved more people. I hadn't thought about it in a while but the sea...it reminded me. Maybe because it's where the battle happened. I don't know." I leaned forward and put my face in my hands. This was not something I wanted to relive, and especially not in front of Tiki, but I couldn't stop myself. I wasn't sure if I was going to start crying, but I hoped I wouldn't. I felt a hand on my back and then I heard her voice close to my ear. It was quiet and filled with kindness.
"I'm sorry, Robin. I wish I knew some way to ease your pain, but I fear I do not have the words." I shook my head.
"No. You listened. It helps."
"I have been through wars as well even before we met," she said. "Though I never carried the weight of overseeing them like you." I looked over at her. Her face was right next to mine.
"It's...exceedingly difficult. Knowing that so many people's lives are my responsibility. And sometimes it gets to me." She rested her forehead against mine like she had the night before.
"I can only imagine. But you need not bear your burden alone." I felt a lump rise in my throat. This wasn't the first time someone had told me something like this. It may not have even been the first time Tiki had told me something like this, although I couldn't remember for sure. Either way I was just as happy to hear it.
"Th-thank you. Tiki...I...I'm sorry I'm ruining the mood." Damn me. I still couldn't get the words out.
"Those who...care about one another should remain together at their worst as well as their best, no?" I couldn't answer, so instead I just tried to smile. It probably looked pained, but I hoped she would get the idea. She must have, because she closed her eyes and smiled back. Our faces were so close that I...I was so tempted to kiss her. But I couldn't. Not without knowing how she felt. She had said 'those who care about each other,' but people could care about each other without it being romantic. And even if she did mean it in a romantic way, I wasn't sure this was the best time. I painstakingly forced my desire down. I closed my eyes too.
I wasn't sure how long we sat there with our heads together, but when we finally moved apart the sun was down and the only lights were the moon and the lamps that dotted the streets. I looked back out at the water.
"Should we head back to the tavern?" I asked.
"If I may," she said, "I...would prefer to continue spending time together."
"Oh. Umm...alright. That works for me," I said. "Should we stay here or do you want to keep walking?"
"Perhaps we could go outside the city away from all the lights," she said.
"Sure," I said and stood up. I offered her a hand to help her up, which she took. We walked back to the street and started walking away from the city center. I wasn't sure how long it took us to reach the outskirts of the city, but I did know that neither of us said a word. I wasn't sure what to say and I guessed she wasn't either.
Once we had gotten outside the harbor we slowed our pace a little as the lights grew more distant. I looked up at the stars now that our view was less impeded by the light from the town. This was probably why Tiki had wanted to come out here. It was a terrific view of the night sky. After we had walked for several more minutes I heard a deep sigh from my left. I looked over and saw her sit down on the grass and bring her knees up to her chin.
"Tiki? Is something wrong?" I asked as I sat next to her.
"I'm sorry," she said, "I suspected this might happen, and yet I decided to ask you to come out here regardless." It took me a second, but I thought I realized what she was talking about.
"Oh, right. The stars." It had been a while since we had talked about it, but I remembered that she said she felt lonely when she looked at the night sky.
"Yes. I thought that if we came out this far we might enjoy gazing at the stars together, but it only served to remind me of all those I have lost. It seems that it was my turn to ruin the mood," she said with an ironic smile. I thought she sounded like she was having trouble speaking.
"I can hardly fault you for feeling upset about it. I can't even imagine how many people you've known. How many you've...lost." I hoped I wasn't being too insensitive by wording it that way.
"Sometimes it feels as though they are as innumerable as the stars themselves." She sounded miserable. I wished there was something I could do.
"Tiki...I'm so sorry."
"May I...lean against you? I...I...I need to know that I am not alone." She sounded like she was about to start crying. The lump returned to my throat.
"O-of course." She moved in closer to me and put her head on my shoulder. Once she did I hesitated a few moments and finally worked up the nerve to put my arm around her. "Of course you're n-not alone. I'm right here." She didn't answer. I heard what I thought was sobbing. It made my chest tighten up. I pulled her a little closer. She shuddered.
"I'm s-sorry," she said after a while once she had regained some of her composure.
"You have nothing to apologize for. Please, don't apologize for missing people you care about."
"It...it is not only that."
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"Of course I miss them. But it is...not only those I have known before. I...I am also being forcibly reminded that one day I will…I...I will lose...y-you." I couldn't answer. No sound would have come out. So I held her against me. I wanted to at least make her understand that I was here now.
"I told you," I said once I thought my throat was clear enough to talk again, "I need to try your pickle recipe, and for that I have to become immortal. Then you won't lose me."
"Please...please do not jest about such things."
"I'm not. I'm going to figure out some way to live forever," I said firmly. I wanted to make her feel better. And part of me was serious. This was the unspoken reality about the feelings I had for her. If we somehow ended up together...she was thousands of years old and would live for thousands of years more. I didn't even know how old I was, but it wasn't more than twenty-five. And if nothing changed I would live for maybe sixty or eighty years maximum. Jest or no...I did want to find some way to live forever if it meant I could be with her. As unlikely as it was, I wanted to do it.
"Robin...even though I know it to be impossible...you say that with such conviction that I almost believe you can do it."
"Because I will. I just...don't know how yet. But I will. So that...so that you don't have to be alone."
"Robin..." her voice trailed off. I decided to let her finish before I said anything. "...I am...very fortunate to have met you. And I am so glad we were able to spend this evening together."
"Me too," I said. We fell into silence and I looked up at the sky. The moon wasn't quite full, but it was still large and bright and served as a majestic forefront to the mass of visible stars. I wondered briefly if people really did join the stars when the died. Was anyone I knew looking at me? Was anyone she knew looking at her? Could...Marth see us? What did he think of us? He was friends with Tiki. Would he want us to be together? He'd want her to be happy, right? Did he think I could make her happy? ...Did I think I could make her happy?
"Robin?" Tiki sounded tired.
"Yes?"
"I'm having trouble staying awake. Could we perhaps return to the tavern now?"
"Alright. I'm kind of tired myself." I pulled my arm back and we stood up. As we started walking back towards the town she started shivering, so once again I reflexively took off my robes and draped them over her shoulders. She murmured in thanks and leaned against me as we walked. At one point her hand brushed against mine. When it did she decided to take hold of it. I let out surprised gasp but regained my composure right away. This wasn't about romance. This was about helping her when she was troubled. More than anything I wanted to be there for her. To let her know that I was here and that she could always lean on me if she wanted to. I gave her hand a gentle squeeze.
We didn't pass anyone on the way back to the tavern except a single town watchman. He either recognized us or realized that we were just two people on a late night walk, because he didn't say anything even though I was sure he could see us. He just turned and walked down a different street. We kept going on our way back to the tavern. There was still light coming from the ground floor, which meant there were still people drinking. I wasn't sure how late it was, but it seemed like everyone should have been done. Even with that in mind, I didn't let go of Tiki's hand before we went inside.
It turned out that there was only one person still drinking. Cherche was sitting at the bar with a large mug in front of her. She didn't look at us. I knew she had no objection to drinking, but I had never seen her with a mug that big this late at night. Something was wrong. I made a mental note to ask her about it once I had seen Tiki to her room. We walked past her and went upstairs to the second floor I started walking more slowly just to make sure we didn't disturb anyone who might already be sleeping.
We reached the door to her room. Very slowly she lifted her head and let go of my hand. She went to shrug off my robes. I held up a hand to indicate that she should stop.
"Keep them," I said.
"Oh no, I could not possibly..." Her voice was shaky. I shook my head.
"I mean it. Hold on to them for tonight." I paused briefly to mentally prepare myself. "This way...this way you'll have a part of me with you. So you won't have to be alone."
"Robin..." she dropped her gaze. A few moments later she nodded. "Thank you." It sounded like she was having difficulty speaking. She turned and pushed the door to her room open. It looked to me like she paused in the doorway. As she did I came to a realization. She had initiated almost all of the physical contact between us. She had done it quite a bit, too. My early guess that she was a tactile person may have been correct. I took a chance.
"Tiki," I said quietly, "wait." She turned back around to face me.
"Hmm?" I leaned forward and pulled her into a hug. I heard a small "oh!" of surprise, and then what sounded like a happy "mm" as she put her arms around me in return.
"Good night, Tiki," I whispered into her ear.
"Good night, Robin," she murmured back. I wasn't sure how long we held our embrace, but when we let go of each other it still didn't feel long enough. She smiled at me and went into her room. I lingered at the door for a moment then turned to go back downstairs. Even as I did I periodically glanced back in the vain hope that she might look back out at me. She didn't. She was probably exhausted and had probably gone right to bed.
I went down the stairs back to the first floor. Cherche was still at the bar so I walked over and sat next to her. The barman offered me a drink, which I took as I placed a few coins on the counter.
"Oh...hello Robin," slurred Cherche. "What are you still doing awake?"
"I was out and about," I said as the barman gave me my drink. "Saw you over here and thought you could use some company. What's got you so down?"
"It's my son. He's being...rather difficult." She took a swig of her drink.
"I imagine it's worse that 'rather difficult' if he's got you drinking this heavily," I said. "Wait...where's Libra?"
"With Gerome. Robin...is there something wrong with us? Do you think we were...bad parents?" I wanted to give her a reassuring pat on the back, but even without her armor she was still in her...usual attire. It didn't feel right. Instead I patted her hand.
"No. I think he comes from a future where you died. I've been thinking about it. It probably seems strange to you to meet your adult son before you even have children, right?"
"It really is an odd feeling," she said. She pushed her empty mug away from her. The barman came over to get her a new one, but I waved him off. She had clearly had enough.
"Right," I said. "It's odd for you. It must be even more so for him. Where he comes from, you're dead. And now you're not. He probably doesn't want to get close to you for fear he could lose you a second time. Just keep showing him that you're his loving mother. I'm sure he'll come around."
"I hope you're right," she said. She signaled for another drink. I waved the barman off again. "Give me a break, Robin."
"No. You've had enough." She grumbled but didn't try again. "Let's get you to bed," I said.
"Fine." She stood up and started wobbling, so I caught her and supported her on my shoulder. "Thank you." We slowly walked to her room which was, thankfully, on the first floor. "I owe you one," she mumbled as I sat her on the bed.
"Oh no you..." I had a sudden thought. "Actually, if you're serious, there is something you can do for me."
"I am serious," she said as she stretched out on the bed. "Any...any...thing..." She started snoring softly. I stood in the doorway a moment to say one last thing before I went up to my own room to sleep.
"I'll tell you in the morning."
A/N: So when I wrote the line about Robin spending all of his time reading I had a thought about whether or not Tiki would be able to. Fire Emblem is a quasi-medieval setting, so it wouldn't be usual for most people to be literate, but on the other hand we see plenty of people who are. And besides, Tiki is 3,000. I thought it might be a little extra characterization for her. Or, of course, she could be downplaying her ability to read in the hopes Robin would offer to help. It would give her an excuse to spend some time with him, since neither seems to have yet figured out that they can just, you know, ask.
Amusingly enough, the pickle recipe is actually canon. Bantu mentions in his supports with the My Unit in New Mystery of the Emblem that he has a recipe for pickles he wants to teach the My Unit. Except that they take 100 years to finish pickling.
Also I spoiled a major part of the ending for Gaiden/Echoes in the birthday chapter, but you know, details.
Can you tell I've played lots of Fire Emblem? You know, from things other than the fact that I've written 97,000 words of a fanfic about it?