Stockholm Syndrome Chapter 21

Previously:

It went much like the one before with us enjoying time with my family. They accepted her warmly, with open arms, and treated her like she had always been a part of our family. That night, Bella slept in my arms again, dreaming of me once more. I was in heaven with our routine and the stolen kisses we had shared that night before she drifted off to sleep.

Those kisses began to be regular occurrences throughout our daily interactions, and even more so before Bella would fall asleep at night. That pattern of days and nights became regular and continued throughout the month of January, and into February too. There was no doubt that I was in love with Bella, but I hadn't said it out loud to her, and she hadn't said it out loud to me. I was fine with that though. The words would come in time. But, I did want her to know how I felt about her. I was about to burst inside, holding it all in. And, it was with that desire that I began to plan a Valentine's Day for Bella that she would remember forever…

I knew that Bella would never let go of her former life and agree to join me forever in mine if she thought that her parents were not surviving in her absence. So, with that in mind, I had hired two private investigators to follow Charlie and Renee to make sure that they weren't totally suffering with the loss of Bella.

Every day I would sneak away while Bella was otherwise distracted with a member of my family. I would go far enough away that she couldn't easily follow, then call them and see what information they had. Each had been taking multiple pictures and they were being emailed to me so I could print them out and give them to Bella. I had asked Alice if she would receive the gift well, and Alice assured me that everything would be fine, but wouldn't elaborate further than that. I had a feeling that she knew more than she was letting on, but that was Alice for you.

I had been preparing the photos, trying to put them in some semblance of order, wanting to make it perfect for her. I also had something else for her, something that was my mother's…a heart that was just like my own…cold, unbeating, and it threw rainbows in the sun just like I did. I hoped that she would accept it and would see that I was literally and metaphorically giving her my heart. It was already hers, whether or not she would accept it from me. It would forever be hers.

I had a few more things to do, including meeting one of our account handlers to get the diamond heart from them. We had all of the important jewelry kept in a vault in Seattle, and we paid our 'employees' quite well, so hand delivering the item was not out of the question when I asked for it.

I left the house while Bella was occupied with my sisters, and headed out to meet J. Jenks to retrieve the heart. It was only a two hour drive, at normal speed, to our meeting location, and I made it in one, quite pleased with myself. The handoff was quick and I was back on the road, eager to get home and make up for lost time with Bella. I had been so busy lately, wanting to make sure that it was all perfect for her.

When I got home, I knew Bella was not in her room because her heartbeat and scent was coming out of mine. But, my door was closed.

I listened in carefully and could tell from her breaths that she was deep asleep. I took the jewelry box, holding the diamond heart, out of my pocket, not wanting to take in into my room and have her find it prematurely. Instead, I went to the music room and hid it inside my piano with the photo album that I had prepared. Valentine's Day was three days away and I wanted to make the night perfect for her.

Making sure that the items were properly stashed away, and that they couldn't damage my piano, I went back to my beautiful sleeping angel, tucked away in my bed. Opening the door, I was hit by her scent. It always happened and I was prepared for it and had grown to enjoy the burn of the venom. What I wasn't prepared for was the view before me on my bed!

Bella was laying there, sound asleep, barely covered in ice blue silk. Her arms were crossed into a makeshift pillow, even though there were plenty of pillows on my bed, and she was uncovered. The best, and worst, thing, though, was her legs. She was in a pair of short, short, short shorts. They were more like glorified underwear. And the way she was lying, with one leg hitched up, I could actually see the plain white cotton panties she was wearing underneath. Had no panties been there then I would have had a perfect view of her…

That thought had a new surge of venom flooding my mouth and I tried to swallow it back. I was fighting with the desire to just take her, claim her, make her mine. But I couldn't do it. I had to do this the right way, the way she deserved. But I wanted her so badly. She had practically gift wrapped herself in ice blue silk, only enough material to really cover the important parts…but even they weren't totally covered in her current position. Looking more closely, as I was somehow right next to the bed now, I could see the side swell of her breast. I wanted to bend over and lick it, caress it, wake her up through my passion…

GAH! Contain yourself, Edward. Get a grip on it! You want her but you can't just take her. It's becoming apparent that she wants you too. You could get closer, even closer, not too close though. Yes, that's it, kneel on the bed. Lean over her. I know you want to touch her, taste her, feed off of her… NO! YES! Yes…yes, Edward. Listen to me… Now, reach forward and touch her, feel her skin under yours. Let her feel the reaction your body has to her.

Unconsciously, my darker side was trying to take control, to win out over the person I had been trying to become for Bella. But it was too much, she was too much. The sight of her…her scent…her taste…it was all too much to handle and I hadn't fed today.

I found myself kneeling beside her, leaned over her body. I heard a growling purr throughout the room and realized that it was me. With one hand bracing my body, I used the other to begin touching her, exploring her skin. I used one finger, only one, and began to trace the perimeter of her outfit. I knew that she had woken up, but she wasn't moving or speaking, just laying there feeling me feel her.

But she finally did try and move, the motion fully exposing one of her breasts to me…the small rosy nipple looking painfully pert and ready for my mouth to claim… What made it worse was her body's reaction to me, to my touch. The scent had been slowly permeating the room, but her movement stirred it and her arousal hit me full force, making me growl more. It was too much, sensory overload. I couldn't trust myself. I wanted her body, her mind, her soul…her blood! I knew I had to stop her, make her realize that right now I wasn't safe for her, but my selfish nature had me wanting more, more touch, some taste, anything to help sate the Bella thirst that it had. Bella froze as I begin to stroke the fabric of her top and speak.

"What the hell is this?" I growled, unable to say it any other way as I was still looking at her exposed breast, my mouth full of venom and my throat burning from the flood I had just swallowed seconds before.

"Uh...uh...pajamas?" Bella responded from her position on the bed.

I tsked my tongue at her and a deep blush crept across her. Apparently the sexy woman that adorned herself in this sinful outfit had gone into hiding and the demure girl was laying there embarrassed.

"If you only knew that these weren't pajamas…that they were..." I trailed off. That outfit was certainly not pajamas. It was an advertisement for passion, seduction, sex, lust, my body claiming hers… It was the devil!

As I thought over all the things that that outfit really was, Bella looked up from her arms. Her eyes met mine and I was overtaken by the sudden flood of her scent, the sound of her moisture rushing into her panties. I looked down at her, my eyes darkened in my aroused state. She trembled slightly as she began to shift onto her side, and then her back, so she could look up at me. The shifting caused her shorts to move, to expose more of her panties, her top moved and played peek-a-boo with her nipples, and her scent…god her scent…it surrounded me like a thick cloud of temptation. I…I wasn't sure of myself anymore… if I could be this close to her and not hurt her.

I closed my eyes and clenched my jaw tightly, fighting the urge to lean down and explore her exposed skin, use my nose to seek out her veins, my hands to hold her down while I took her over and over again. I fisted my hands to keep them from clasping onto her wrists to hold her there. Bella moved below me, lifting her hand towards my face, but that was the worst thing she could do at that moment. Quick as lightning, I grasped her wrist, stopping her before she touched me.

"Bella…no. I think…I think you need to put some clothes on…" I said in a strained, almost disgusted voice…disgusted at myself, not her. I didn't have the restraint I thought I had. I wasn't sure I ever would. And it made me sick with myself.

"I…you…huh?" Bella responded as she laid there.

I turned my face away from hers, her breath was even eliciting primal responses from me. My hand was still around her wrist, unknowingly to me, and I tightened my fist even more in an urge to keep myself from taking her right then and there.

"I said put some clothes on," I growled through gritted teeth as I opened my eyes and tried to find something, anything, to focus on that might distract me from my desires and wicked thoughts.

When I smelled the salt water tears from Bella, I knew something was wrong. I looked down at her quickly as she bit down on her lip. Her eyes darted to her wrist, which I held captive, and back to my face. Realization dawned and I released her quickly and backed off of the bed. Bella pulled her wrist to her, rubbing it some as the tears actually spilled over her lashes and down her cheeks. She slid off the bed and started to stalk out of the room. Oh god, had I hurt her that badly?

Before I could go to her she spun around and spat at me. "Fuck you, Edward! If you didn't want me you could have just fucking said so."

She turned to leave but I was right there, gripping her shoulders and spinning her to face me. Not want her? She thought I didn't want her? I fucking want her too fucking much for her fucking good! I had to tell her, to make her see that I wanted her more than I could handle, more than she could survive at that time… I opened my mouth to speak but Bella pushed against my chest.

"NO!" she screamed at me. "Do NOT fucking touch me! You made your desires perfectly fucking clear!"

I stood there, my mouth open, my hands raised in the air defensively, as she spun around and stalked across the hall, slamming her door behind her.

I listened to her collapse onto her bed, muted sniffles coming through the walls. I had royally fucked up…again.

I wanted to go to her, to explain why I had reacted the way I had, but the draw for her was still too strong. I needed to feed, and not on her. So, instead of going to her room, I ran from the house until I came across a scent, any scent. Without even realizing my prey, I took it down and drained it dry, only then realizing that it was a full sized bison. Not fully sated, I discarded the remains and went in search of something more. I came across a cougar, stalking through the underbrush, and let instinct take over as I overtook it and sank my teeth into the soft flesh, sucking the warm life force into my mouth, swallowing it with a feral growl.

I drained the cougar quickly and disposed of the carcass before sitting back for a moment. I was glad that I had enough restraint to keep from harming Bella. If I had let loose on her earlier then I probably would have killed her. It would kill me to harm her in any manner. I was pissed at myself enough for holding her wrist like I had. I just had to talk to her, tell her why I turned her away, make her understand that I did want her, just too much for her own good at that moment.

With that in mind, I ran back to the house and to her bedroom door. I was thankful that my family was keeping their distance and letting me handle this on my own. I needed to be able to take care of things with my mate…my mate…I loved the way that sounded.

I stood in front of her door and listened in. She wasn't sleeping, not yet, her breathing and heartbeat gave that away. So, I knocked on her door. She didn't answer, move, respond in any way. I knocked again and still nothing.

Getting frustrated I tried the handle and she had locked her door. So I knocked again, calling out to her, but still, she ignored me.

Defeated, I let out a sigh and went back to my room to sulk alone, thinking and hoping that she just needed the night to calm down and would speak to me in the morning. That night was one of the longest of my existence. The next morning dawned and I stayed in my room waiting to hear Bella get up. She did, finally, and I heard her leave her room. Before I could go to her, she was in the bathroom locking the door. I heard her go through her morning routine and was tempted to wait outside the bathroom door for her, but that would be stalkerish of me. So, I waited in my room again, and heard her exit the bathroom, but wasn't fast enough to catch her before her door slammed shut and locked.

With a resigned sigh, I headed out to the living room trying to find something to do. I heard her, finally, but she called for Rose instead of me. Rose scowled at me as she came out of her room and went to Bella's. A little while later she returned and got some food for Bella from the kitchen, before disappearing back into Bella's bedroom. I wanted to go beat down the door and confront Bella, explain everything, but Emmett and Jasper suddenly appeared, just as Alice walked through towards Bella's room, and the guys took me outside and dragged me off for an impromptu hunting trip.

They tried to distract me, but my mind was only on Bella. I finally broke free from their attempts and headed back to the house. Bella's door was wide open, but she wasn't in there. I heard talking from the other end of the house, and followed it and Bella's scent to Rose's bedroom. Before I could knock, Esme squeezed by me and shut the door in my face.

Defeated, I went to my room and wallowed in my own self pity.

The next day was exactly the same. I was kept from Bella, no matter how hard I tried. I did everything short of breaking down a wall and going caveman by dragging her out. I had to get her to talk to me because of my plans for the following day. It was Valentine's Day and I was determined to go through with my plans, Bella willing or not. If I had to throw her over my shoulder and practically kidnap her, I would. But I had to give her the gifts I had prepared for her. I just knew she needed them.

The morning of Valentine's Day started like the past two, with Bella ignoring me. I was completely fed up with it too. Alice and Rose took her to Alice and Jasper's bedroom and locked themselves away for the day. Alice even kicked Jasper out and I was recruited to play some video games with him and Emmett. This wasn't how I was supposed to spend the day. Sure, Em and Jazz were great, but they didn't have the warm, soft, seductive body that I thought of morning, noon, and night.

After about two hours of pretending to pay attention to the gaming session, and being distracted by the talking and laughing from the room on the other end of the hall, I had had enough.

"That's it!" I roared as I stood up and stalked out of the bedroom and down the hall. I stopped right before Alice and Jasper's door and reached for the handle. But Alice's voice invaded my mind.

Don't you dare, Edward. Alice warned me.

But it was supposed to be my day with Bella and Alice and Rose were monopolizing her time and keeping me from explaining what had really happened.

I reached for the handle again.

I swear to god, Edward. Do not do it!

My hand gripped the handle and slowly began to turn it and I heard Alice stand up.

Fucking A, Edward! Let the girl be!

I heard the latch click and started to push the door open.

I will rip your dick off and hide it from you! Leave her alone!

With that threat, I threw the door open, not caring that the handle went through the drywall behind it, and stalked forward. Alice tried to get in my way but I pushed her to the side and bent over, picking a shocked Bella up off of the floor and threw her over my shoulder.

Bella screamed and started hitting me in the back as I turned and began to stalk out of Alice and Jasper's room. Rose and Alice were screaming at me to put Bella down, but I ignored them. The hallway was crowded with Emmett and Jasper, who assessed the situation, nodded at me as I passed them, before they restrained their women. This was between Bella and I, and they needed to stay the fuck out of it.

Even Carlisle and Esme stayed out of my way as I stalked across the house with Bella, turned down the hallway, and into my room, slamming the door shut behind me. Bella was still yelling and screaming at me, but was silenced with an 'oof' when I tossed her on my bed.

"Stay!" I growled, my inner vampire making the command known.

I stalked out of my room and into the kitchen, grabbing the basket I had prepared earlier in hopes of tonight happening, and then went to the music room and grabbed her gifts out of the piano, before stomping back to my room. I opened the door and Bella was standing beside my bed, wringing her hands together like she had contemplated trying to leave.

I walked in and shut the door behind me, not bothering to lock it, and set the photo album and the jewelry box on my dresser, before grabbing a folded blanket and smoothing it out over my comforter. It was red plaid and picnic like. Bella just watched as I stalked around the room, preparing things in an agitated state.

This was not how this was supposed to be, this was not how I was supposed to talk to her, tell her how I…

"How you what?" Bella's voice sounded out. Had I said that out loud? A look up at her confirmed that I had.

"Nothing," I mumbled and continued setting up the items I had prepared…cheese cubes, strawberries dipped in chocolate, a melon tray with watermelon, honeydew, and cantaloupe, and a pasta salad. I even picked out a bottle of champagne to go with the strawberries. I knew Bella wasn't actually old enough to drink, but it was a special occasion.

I pulled out the champagne flute that I had put in the basket, opened the bottle, and poured a glass for Bella, handing it to her silently.

"Have a seat," I motioned to the bed and walked around to the other side, sitting down myself. I sat cross-legged, my back to the headboard, the food spread before me, and waited to see if Bella sat down beside me. My head was hung as I took in her defensive posture, but it slowly relaxed, and after a minute, she sat down on the bed beside me. She wasn't as close as she had been before the whole rejection episode, but she was at least in the same room as me.

Bella took a sip of her champagne, then another and about killed me when she moaned luxuriously. That would not help my desires for her at all. So, I offered her some food, thinking she would eat quietly, and the moaning was even more pronounced.

Trying to not concentrate on her moaning, I looked over her body, finally seeing what she was wearing. I was going to kiss and kill my sisters. Bella was in a pair of skinny, dark washed jeans, a cobalt blue tank top that was cut so low most of her breasts were exposed, and a white fitted button up shirt that was unbuttoned to show the tank. My sisters knew what the color blue did to me on her, and showing her breasts like so, did nothing but make me focus on her moaning even more.

Unconsciously, I reached for one of the chocolate covered strawberries and held it to her lips. Bella looked up at me with uncertainty in her eyes, but slowly opened her mouth to bite down on the piece of fruit, moaning once more. A small trail of juice trickled down her chin and I wanted to lick it off, but she beat me to it, making me pout.

I tried to feed her another but she declined and I saw something change in her eyes, a determination built deep within them. I was suddenly afraid of what she was about to say or do.

"Edward, we need to talk."

Fuck! I hated conversations that began like that.

"Ok, about what?" I asked, knowing damn well what she wanted to talk about. And I did need to explain myself and my reaction the other night.

"You know what about." She crossed her arms and glared at me, no trace of moaning left in her stance.

"Shit," I muttered, running my hand through my hair, trying to figure out where to start. "First off, I want you to know that I wasn't rejecting you, in fact, it was far from it."

"Yeah, tell me another lie. You were repulsed by me!" Bella yelled and I clamped my hand over her mouth to keep another outburst at bay so I could finish what I was trying to say in the first place.

"Will you just shut up for a minute so I can finish?" I asked her and her mouth fell open behind my hand. I pulled it back and continued. "I wasn't rejecting you. When I walked in and saw you lying there, practically fucking gift wrapped for me…and the position…what I saw…panties…ni…nipple…fucking perfection…" I stumbled through what I was trying to say but kept going, hoping that she would understand everything. "Your scent was…mouthwatering, and your body…perfect…you…I…aroused…" I kept trying to explain but my words were jumbled as I remembered with perfect clarity that night and the reaction I had to her. Before I could try and say more, Bella's hand covered my mouth.

"Oh, so, um, what you're trying to say is that you wanted me?"

"Oh god yes, so badly, too much for me to handle," I confessed, relieved that she was beginning to understand.

"And, do you still…want me?"

"Oh god, Bella, more than ever. That will never wane, only increase the more I'm around you. You will never have to worry about me not wanting you, about me rejecting you…ever."

Bella looked up at me, and it looked like she was trying not to cry. I knew I had to do something to make her smile.

"I got you something, you know…for Valentine's Day," I said as I jumped up and got the jewelry box off of my dresser, leaving the photo album for the time being.

"Oh Edward, you didn't have to. I didn't get you anything. God, I'm so pathetic." Bella mumbled the last part.

I took her chin in my hand and tilted her face to meet mine once I climbed back on the bed.

"Never, ever, speak of yourself like that again, do you hear me?" I said with a fierceness that shocked even myself. Hearing anyone speak badly of her was horrible, but to hear her speak badly about herself, it was heartbreaking.

Bella nodded in agreement and I released her chin, taking her hand to put the jewelry box in it. She slowly opened the box with her other hand and gasped, almost dropping the box. I steadied it in her hand and then took the necklace out of it. It was a platinum chain that I had the diamond heart strung on. I motioned to Bella's neck, holding the necklace open, and she pulled her hair up and twisted so her back was to me.

I reached around her, lacing my arms through hers to drape the necklace across her delicate skin. I clasped the thin chain behind her neck, then adjusted it down her collar to make sure it laid just right across her flesh. When my hands came back up, they skimmed her neck and she took in a sharp breath. The distinct smell of her arousal began to seep throughout the room, making me lean in to sample the bouquet for myself.

I skimmed my nose up her neck to right below her ear, and let out my cool breath over her skin, making her shiver. Her hands released her hair but came backwards to thread through mine, making me shift closer to her body until my chest was against her back.

"You know this necklace, the heart, it is just like mine. It's cold, doesn't beat, but it's yours, just as mine is. My heart will forever be for you and you alone, and if it could beat, it would only beat for you," I murmured in her ear.

Bella's breathing picked up, as did her heart rate. Her hands moved through my hair, massaging my scalp as I ran the tip of my nose along the shell of her ear. In an unexpected move, Bella turned her head and pressed her lips to mine, taking my breath away in a flash.

I kissed her tentatively at first, testing the waters and my restraint. I didn't know it at the time, but my restraint was about to be tested to the utmost level. Bella twisted through the kiss, deepening it, making me want it, want her, want more.

I pulled her to me, making her straddle my lap as I knelt on the bed. She twisted out of her button up shirt, leaving only the tank top and jeans between us. As Bella tried to shift closer to me, I assisted her by grabbing onto her ass and pulling her to me, our groins pressing up against each other causing simultaneous moans to erupt from our meshed lips.

I knew that she would stop soon, or that I would, so I kept going, eager to enjoy myself while it lasted. But when Bella broke the kiss and grabbed the hem of her tank top, I was shocked to say the least.

I stopped her hand and forced her to look at me.

"Bella, what are you doing?" I asked her while somewhere inside of me, my monster was threatening to kill me for stopping her.

"Do you not want me? Did you not want to…?" Bella trailed off and I could see the hurt start to form on her face.

"Oh baby, of course I want to. I just want to make sure that you want to," I explained, my eyes searching hers for any uncertainty in what we were doing. I knew that if I had her before me, naked and willing, I wouldn't be able to stop myself. I had to be sure it was what she wanted no matter how much I wanted it.

"Then shut up and kiss me," Bella said with a forceful tone as she ripped her tank top off, leaving just her lacy white bra covering her top half.

"So beautiful," I choked out as I took in her half naked state, before pulling her to me and kissing her roughly, ever careful of my teeth.

Bella's mouth devoured mine, her hands pulling at my shirt, so I ripped it from my skin, shocking her. But soon, her mouth smiled against mine and her hands started to roam my bare chest. I wanted her chest bare against mine so I began to tentatively finger her bra.

"Get rid of it," Bella murmured against my mouth, her tongue darting out to trace my bottom lip.

I didn't waste any time and I gripped the material and pulled, feeling it tear away from itself. I repeated the movement with the straps and Bella bowed her back so the material could fall from her body. I snatched it up and threw it to the side, not caring where it landed.

The moment her bare breasts pressed against my cold chest, I felt her nipples pebble under the temperature change. The moan she released was wanton and full of desire. Unable to stop myself I got up on my knees and shifted backward so I could lay her on the bed before pressing myself against her prone form.

My hands began to roam her torso, skimming across one breast, then the other, as my mouth moved from her lips to her neck, kissing and licking the flesh. Bella was writhing underneath me, making me impossibly hard for her. I couldn't get enough of her, I wanted more, more of her, more of her flesh against mine.

Swallowing audibly and preparing myself for possible rejection, I moved my hand south until I reached the waist of her jeans. I paused my ministrations and Bella noticed immediately, looking up at me with her deep brown pools.

I swallowed again and met her gaze, fingering the button. I took a deep breath and asked the make it or break it question of the night.

"May I?"