A/N: Thanks you guys so much for the reviews! I love them all. Please be sure to read the author's note at the end. It gets deep! I also dedicate this to a guest reviewer I believe is named Kammy (?) don't quote me on the name, but they'll get it. PLEASE READ THE NOTE AT THE END!

Chapter 21: Barrier

Jonas was fucking psycho.

It wasn't like me to use that harsh of a word unless it was necessary, but it was the only thing I could think of. He wore the disguise of my chemistry teacher and stood in front of the class. He pulled out Mr. Davis's lesson plan and went over our notes. He used the projector and moved onto chapter fifteen. When one of my classmates raised their hand, he answered their question with ease. He even assigned us homework.

Jonas was fucking psycho.

When the bell rang, I didn't move. Jennifer Ansley made some kind of smart remark about helping me if I needed to know where the door was. I ignored her and kept my eyes on the man in the front. I noticed the vampire beside me didn't make a move either, the both of us sitting completely still. Somebody had to make a move. The door to the classroom closed and locked. Jonas took a step forward.

"Ms. Bennett," he said, imitating Mr. Davis's voice perfectly. "Don't you have another class to get to?"

I stared at him, the real him, although his glamour shifted in and out. The look in his eyes said that he thought he had me, but I was over the initial shock. At this point after my best friend becoming a vampire, my other best friend being a doppelganger, and me having some kind of doings with an anti-hero vampire, not much could keep me shocked for long.

"Why are you teaching my chemistry class?" I asked.

"Because I'm the chemistry teacher." He said simply.

"Where is Mr. Davis?" I asked.

"Sleeping." Jonas smiled.

I didn't take too much comfort in that. "Why are you here?"

As soon as the words left my lips, I realized how much I'd been asking them lately. Why are you here, what do you want? They seemed to be some kind of twisted mantra dedicated towards my everyday life. At first they'd been used for Damon, but now I wanted him close all the time. Jonas could stay extremely far away from me, though, as far as Damon was close.

Jonas smiled. "I'm merely exploring my love for academia. I was a professor for five years, did you know that?"

I didn't care. More importantly, I wanted to get out of this classroom. I hadn't bothered taking my books out, which made grabbing my bag easier. As soon as I tried to get to my feet, the vampire next to me put his hand on my shoulder and shoved me right back down.

My head snapped in his direction, eyes narrowing.

The vampire snarled as his hands went to his head and he fell out of the chair. I could feel his veins pulsing with the pain I was inflicting, and the stream of blood that came from his nose gave me a twisted satisfaction. It had been awhile since I'd done this to a vampire, but I could still remember how to do it. My eyes narrowed to slits as the vampire's fangs extended and his body trembled with pain. He would never touch me again; I'd make sure of it.

"That's right," Jonas said. "Give into it. Feed that darkness."

I stopped immediately.

The vampire on the floor was laughing as he wiped at his nose. I looked between him and Jonas and saw the same amusement in both of their eyes. Something wasn't adding up here. The vampire licked the blood off of his top lip and propped himself on his elbow.

"She's delicious." His voice was husky, lust filled.

I grabbed my bag and scooted between the desks. "What's wrong with him?"

"The beautiful thing about vampires," Jonas said. "Is that over time they tend to adapt to certain things. Alex here spent years being tortured by witches and learned to turn his pain into pleasure. It's quite fascinating, really."

I kept my eyes on Alex.

"You're a fucking rush." Alex said, trailing his hand down his stomach and into his pants. When his shirt lifted, I caught sign of a scar. "Do it again, baby."

I looked at Jonas. "This is your plan?"

"I meant what I said in that clearing, Bonnie." Jonas said. "Look at you, still bathed in light and afraid to cross that line. We'll change that pretty soon."

"You aren't changing anything." I told him.

"Prepared to stop me?" he raised an eyebrow.

"If I have to."

He smiled. "Careful Bonnie, you might be believable."

"Let's hope I am."

He chuckled. "Let's."

I heard the door click and open, the sound of students in the hall filling the room. Alex got to his feet and shook his head, retracting his fangs. He picked up his chemistry book, winked at me, then walked out of the classroom.

"What do you want from me?" I asked.

"I want you to accept all of who you are."

"You're trying to force me into what you think I should be."

"You're fighting your nature."

"I'm fighting you."

Jonas tilted his head and the disguise of Mr. Davis fell back into place. "Class is over, Ms. Bennett. You should get going."

Jonas stacked his papers, picked up his briefcase, and strolled out of the room. I even caught sight of him waving at another teacher as he passed. I moved out of the classroom quickly to see if I could catch up to him, for why I didn't know, but when I stepped out of the class, he was gone.

The rest of the day continued like I thought it would, with me in and out of focus. I answered the questions correctly and took the notes, but my mind wasn't absorbing or paying attention. Jonas had said he was going to "change that", but what did that even mean. Was he going to try to exploit my magic? Was he going to go to extremes?

And that vampire, Alex. What the hell was his deal? I'd never heard of a vampire turning pain into pleasure before. It worked sometimes with people, which explained a lot of the fetishes I'd heard about or seen on television, but an actual vampire being able to do it scared the hell out of me.

How could I fight something that I couldn't hurt?

The pain infliction was basic one oh one for me. It was the prelude to the rest of my anti-vampire spells and it was one of the quickest ways to summon my magic. I knew Damon could fight it off, plus he was my familiar so it made sense that he could, but other vampires? I needed to text Damon.

Matt came up to me at my locker. "Hey, can you take me to work? My truck broke down."

"Sure," I said as I pressed send. "When did it break down?"

"This morning." He shook his head.

"Why didn't you call me? I could've picked you up."

"It's out of your way and Paul picked me up."

I cringed. "How was that?"

Paul Moss had a reputation for having sex strictly in his car. I'd heard stories about the inside of it, the sights and smells, but I'd never known anyone who'd been inside personally.

Matt shrugged. "You keep the windows down and try not to see the used condoms and you're fine."

I shook my head. "Sounds pretty traumatic."

"I took another shower when I got here, don't tell anyone."

Jonas was still on my mind as Matt and I headed into the student parking, but I couldn't do anything about it until I talked to Damon. He was the only one I really trusted with the information, and telling Stefan would be beneficial towards Elena, but it wouldn't help much. He'd jump the gun, threaten Jonas, and the problem would be bigger before I knew it. I stuck with the same train of thought I always had.

If Jonas wanted Elena, he'd have her by now. Nothing was changing that.

In my car, Matt filled me in on what was going on between him and the girl he'd hooked up with. For the life of me I couldn't remember her name, but I was just glad Matt was getting back out there. He'd taken Elena and Caroline pretty hard. I was happy that he was at least out there testing the waters again.

Even if he was unsure about it. "So wait, what happened again?"

Matt rolled his eyes. "We were having sex and then she ran."

I rolled my lips in and narrowed my eyes. "I don't…I'm not…what?"

"That's what I said!" Matt went on. "It wasn't bad sex either, Bonnie, at least I don't think."

"I mean, maybe it was so good she had to go running through the halls of the house?"

"That's just it! She didn't run through the halls, she ran into her bathroom!"

"Matt, I have to be honest, I don't like where this story is going."

My phone vibrated and I waited until we were at the stop light to check it. It was from Damon, saying that he'd meet me at my house in twenty minutes. I responded telling him I was with Matt.

"She told me she liked me and she didn't want to be used for sex." He said.

"I thought it only happened once." I said.

"About that…"

Damon replied. Ditch the jock, meet me at your place.

I'm taking him to work.

I hit send and made a right into the Grill. I recognized a couple of cars from school in the parking lot and parked next to what I believed to be Stacy Maddox's car.

"Do you like her?" I asked as we got out of my car.

Matt shrugged. "Kind of, but I don't know."

"Maybe you shouldn't be having sex with someone you kind of don't know if you like."

My phone buzzed again.

"You've been texting a lot recently." Matt said.

"Gotta work on that subject change, Donovan."

"In due time." He said as we stepped inside of the Grill. "Seriously, you've been texting a lot."

"That's what the unlimited plan is for, best friend."

"What's his name?" he asked.

Damon Salvatore. "Who says I'm texting anyone?"

"Your phone is. It says buzz."

"That's who I'm texting. His name is Buzz."

"Is he an astronaut?" Matt asked.

"Used to be. He gave it up for a quiet life in the old west."

"And how did you two meet?"

"Yard sale."

I'd been following Matt subconsciously, not paying attention to our steps. It wasn't until I realized he wasn't heading for the back room, like he usually did, that I noticed what was going on. Matt was steering me towards a booth. A booth in the corner where no one really sat unless the Grill was packed. A booth that had really dim lighting and no window beside it.

A booth that Jeremy was sitting in.

Everything fell into place and spelled out how much of an idiot I was. There was nothing wrong with Matt's truck. As a matter of fact, I remembered seeing it this morning when I got to school. How I forgot that I didn't know. Why it wasn't in the school parking lot when we left was a mystery as well. I could kill him right now.

Matt nudged me into the seat across from Jeremy. "Dude, I didn't know you'd be here."

Jeremy smiled. "Yeah, I just got here not too long ago."

"Imagine that." I said smiling and trying not to send Matt flying across the room.

Matt pulled out his phone. "I've gotta go, but you guys will be okay won't you?"

"Us, yes. You? Have a great day at work Matt."

"That sounds menacing." Matt smirked.

"It's supposed to." I blinked.

Matt went off to the back room and I was stuck sitting across from Jeremy with a vibrating phone in my pocket. There had to be a way for me to gracefully leave whatever this was and get to Damon. Despite the mood lifter that was Matt Donovan, Jonas was still at Mystic Falls High.

"So…" Jeremy said.

"Were you in on this?" I asked.

"No." He said quickly. Too quickly.

"Were you?"

"I'm serious, I wasn't-" But he was smiling.

"Jeremy." I said, smiling back.

"Okay so maybe me and Matt set this up."

"I thought you were waiting until I asked you."

"You took forever." He said. "I asked you out last month."

"There's a dead witch helping a vampire try to kill your sister. It's a little time consuming."

"Someone's always trying to kill Elena." Jeremy said. "Doesn't mean the rest of us can't live."

"That's pretty callous, Gilbert."

"She's dating, why can't anyone else?"

Valid. "My point is that I haven't been avoiding you, I've just been busy."

"Busy with new clothes, I see."

"You aren't going to make this easy are you?"

"Only as easy as you've made it for me." He winked.

It was cute and slightly annoying. I had things to do, he had a great smile.

My Jonas paranoia won. "Jeremy I have to-"

"Go research a spell you won't find, try to find out the plans of a vampire who's already ten steps ahead, or do the homework we already know is done? Which one?" His smile grew.

For some reason, I felt stuck.

I crossed my legs. "Getting Matt to lie was pretty sneaky."

"I didn't have to get him to do anything. He wanted to help." Jeremy raised an eyebrow.

Behind us, Matt had already changed into his apron and was carrying a pitcher full of whatever to a table. He looked over at us, winked, and proceeded to the table on the other side of Grille. I had about five seconds.

"Oh really?" I said. "Well now I don't have to feel bad."

Jeremy stared. "Feel bad about what?"

I snapped my fingers. The drink erupted into Matt's face.

The whole Grill was looking in his direction now, Jeremy was cracking up. Matt looked confused for about two seconds before his eyes landed on mine. I winked and blew him and puckered my lips at him. He gave me a fake glare and shook his head.

"There isn't like some mystical consequence for that is there?"

I shook my head. "Nah. He'll just smell like whatever that is for the night."

"Remind me never to piss you off." He said.

"No more ambush dates and we have a deal."

Jeremy got serious. "Is it really that bad? Us being here?"

No, it wasn't. In all actuality, being here with Jeremy was one of the better parts of the day. But when I already had a vampire boy…whatever Damon was, it just kind of seemed like I was being dishonest. Damon knew Jeremy liked me, apparently everyone knew how much except me, but I felt like there was a difference. Jeremy liking me was one thing, me entertaining it was another. I felt somewhat guilty for being here.

Or maybe I was just loyal to a guy who hadn't really promised me anything.

And then, the thought clicked in my head. Damon liked me, but he loved Elena. I couldn't deny that. The way he felt around her was so consuming sometimes, I could feel it in my bones and hear it like the echoes of a chime in the back of my mind. As much as I tried not to worry about Elena switching brothers, the thought was more unsettling than I gave it credit for. If Elena did end up choosing Damon, what would he do?

What would I do?

Jeremy took my silence the wrong way. "You know what, Bonnie? You're right. I'll just wait until you're ready. This wasn't a good idea."

He started to get up, but I grabbed his hand. "No, it's fine."

Jeremy sat down, slowly.

"So you got an A on the art project?" I said, moving things along.

Jeremy reached under the table and pulled out a medium sized canvas. When he held it up, the first thing I noticed was how much green was everywhere. Jeremy had taken extreme amount of care with the details giving almost every leaf its own life. The sky overhead was the perpetual overcast Mystic Falls had this time of year, and everything was captured so beautifully.

Even me.

My hair was wild around my face, eyes fierce. The expression I was wearing was one of mid scream; my arm outstretched and finger pointing. My clothes were captured in the movement, frozen in as they'd billowed in the wind I'd created. Jeremy had even gotten the paisley design of the top perfectly. I looked strong and majestic, powerful and beautiful.

I looked up. "This is amazing."

The tips of his ears flamed.

The more I stared at the painting, the more details I started noticing. He'd gotten my ears correct, even down to the little flower earrings I'd worn that day. The way my hair curled towards the front, but got wavier the longer it got. He'd even gotten the teal nail color I'd painted my nails. I could see the twinkle in my eyes and practically see the magic in the picture.

I looked at him. "I love it."

"It's yours."

"I thought you said your teacher wanted it on display?"

"And I told her I knew somewhere else it needed to be." He smiled.

I didn't know if this beat Roman's painting of the TARDIS, but it was close. Freakishly close. Jeremy had captured me better than any picture ever could. He'd painted me in such a way that I'd never thought of before. Here, I was the witch everyone thought I was. I was the girl, the woman, that could wield magic curse vampires into oblivion. I'd never felt the way I looked in this picture. Close, but not exactly.

"Thank you." I said softly.

"You're welcome." He said, voice intense.

Damon was calling me.

The only reason I knew that was because I'd given him a Nine Inch Nails ringtone. It was loud and banging, completely snapping me out of the moment and making me blink. I answered.

"Hey," I said, trying not to look at the painting.

"Where are you?" he asked, he was annoyed.

"I brought Matt to work," I replied. "I told you that."

"You didn't tell me it'd take forever. I knew you drove slow, but this is a new low Bonnie."

I rolled my eyes. "Where are you?"

"Your room." I could hear the smirk in his voice.

"Don't touch anything." I warned.

"I'm touching everything." He said. "And if you aren't here in the next twenty minutes, I'll be naked on the couch when Pop Bennett walks through the door."

The threat was funny. The seriousness behind it wasn't.

"I'm on my way." I sighed and hung up. "Jeremy, I have to-"

"Go," he finished. "Right. I get it. I just wanted to give you the painting, that's it."

I grabbed it and walked over to his side of the booth. We were close to each other, not the Damon close, but still close enough, and I hugged him.

"Thank you." I told him. "I really love it."

"Love enough to stay for five more minutes?"

I didn't know what to say, so I got up. "I'll text you."

He nodded. "I hope you mean that."

I did.

On the way out, I saw Matt walking towards me with a pitcher. I snapped my fingers again.

In the car, I took several deep breaths and pulled out of the parking lot. Matt, I blamed Matt for all of this. Setting me up on dates with adorable boys that had artistic talent. Matt was the only one who knew about my slight thing for artists. I wouldn't put it past him to have told Jeremy to give me the painting. Not that Jeremy hadn't planned on giving it to me himself, I'm pretty sure he had, but it wouldn't have surprised me if Matt had persuaded him to get it earlier than planned.

What the hell was I doing?

Was I leading him on? Was leading someone on really that easy or unconscious? If it was one thing I'd learned about myself and anything my Grams taught me was that I couldn't run away from the truth. It just never panned out well for those who did. The truth was that I liked Jeremy. He was cute and tall and had the kind of smile you saw in picture frames before you put your own pictures in. More than that, he adored me.

Could I say the same for Damon?

But even if I couldn't, Damon had made me feel things. Things that were deeper and more passionate than anything I ever had before. He was like the fire I'd channeled in the woods, big and burning and bright. He was the kind of guy who consumed you and you liked it. Loved it even. Jeremy may have painted it, but whenever Damon touched me it was how I felt.

I cursed several times.

By the time I got home and got the painting out of the car, I decided that my biggest concern right now would be Jonas. There was a guy who had no romantic interest in me, made his intentions clear (somewhat), and who I could think about without it being emotionally confusing. He still semi scared the hell out of me, but I'd rather be scared at this point.

Damon was stretched out on my bed when I walked in my room. He'd found my copy of "A Clockwork Orange". It shouldn't have looked as sexy as it did.

He looked at his watch. "You got here in eleven minutes. Cutting it awfully close there."

I rolled my eyes. "Couldn't have you walking around naked could we?"

Damon looked up, smirking. "I thought you liked it when I walked around naked."

"Not when it involves my father." I said.

Damon shook his head. "Agreed."

I decided to jump right into it. "Jonas is pretending to be my teacher."

Damon's eyes narrowed. "What do you mean?"

"He's casted a spell on himself, a glamour. He's pretending to be my teacher."

"That's an interesting twist."

"There's a new vampire in my class." I told him.

"I leave you alone for half a day and you've managed to somehow step ass deep in the thing I told you not to worry about."

"Jonas came to me." I said. "I didn't know he'd be there."

"Have you told Stefan?" Damon asked.

I shook my head. "Jonas didn't say anything about Elena."

"What did he say?"

"He," I stopped. "The vampire, Alex, he put his hand on my shoulder. I sent pain at him."

"Like a good witch," Damon patronized. "Go on."

"He liked it."

Damon froze. "What did you say?"

The alarm that spiked through me wasn't my own. Damon knew something.

"Alex liked the pain."

Damon sat up on my bed. "What did he look like?"

I rattled off a description as best I could. Dark brown hair, handsome, dark brown eyes, a scar on his side.

There was that spike in alarm again.

Out of respect for Damon, I didn't mention it. He hated when I read his mind or his emotions, but sometimes they came through so strongly, I couldn't help it. Although I was dying to ask Damon what he knew about Alex, I knew it would only put him in a bad mood.

Judging by the look on his face, he was already headed there.

"Stay away from him." Damon told me, voice low.

"He's in my class, Damon. I can't skip all the time."

"That's fine," Damon told me in a serious voice. "But do not go near him outside of that."

"Do you know him?" I asked.

"Are you in my head again?"

I shook my head. "No, it's just obvious something's up."

He wasn't looking at me anymore. He'd changed subjects. "What's that?"

I could play dumb, but it wouldn't get me anywhere. "It's something from school."

Damon swung his legs and was standing, walking towards me in one fluid motion. "It smells like acrylic."

"It's just a painting." I said.

"Then why are you holding it away from me like it's the secret to the universe?"

"If I had the secret to the universe, I wouldn't have come home."

"You wouldn't share it with me?" he came closer.

"Because you share everything with me?" I asked.

Damon pulled me close. "Still answering questions with questions, huh?"

He leaned down like he was going to kiss me. I tilted my head up a little so I could meet his lips. He snatched the painting from me. I rolled my eyes and tossed my bag on the floor. I should've seen that coming.

A feeling spread through our Familiar bond, but I couldn't say what it was.

A lot of emotions were filtering in through the bond, no matter how controlled Damon looked on the outside. I could still feel his alarm, his anger at something, but when I tried to prod at his thoughts the emotions were too strong. All I got was feeling and if I didn't pull away, I'd end up breaking something out of rage.

"Who drew this?" he asked.

"Jeremy." I said, sitting on my bed and trying to focus on my own emotions.

"That explains it."

"Explains what?"

"Why it's wrong." Damon said matter of factly.

I was on my feet and trying to snatch the painting away from him. "It's not wrong, it's perfect."

"Yeah, in the same way stick figures are." Damon said haughtily.

"You're being an jerk." I said. "There's nothing wrong with this painting."

"Your eyes aren't that shade of green, your hair isn't layered like that, your fingers aren't this stubby. Not to mention the shading is off, the shadowing is worse, and the bird's eye view effect is completely ruined. Your hair isn't black enough to give off that kind of sheen and how the hell would you even have a sheen under an overcast sky?"

I stared at him in shock.

"What? I'm just telling you, Bonnie, if you're going to keep a painting away from someone, make sure it's one worth keeping."

"You can't be this much of an asshole." I said. "Even you have limits."

"I killed my brother's best friend and snapped our only living relative's neck. Pointing out obvious flaws in a child's painting, no matter the subject, isn't being an asshole. It's critiquing."

"Or maybe you're jealous." I muttered.

I don't know where it came from, I don't know why it chose that moment to show itself, but the thoughts inside of my head decided to be front and center in the air between me and Damon. I was still feeling the anger that he felt, that unexplained anger. I expected him to give me a death glare or snap.

Instead, he laughed.

And I don't mean the regular laughing. I don't even mean the obvious over extensive laughing either. Damon was full on laughing, loud and amused. I opened the bond between us and I could actually feel his amusement. He really found this hilarious. What made it so bad was that even through my growing annoyance, the laughter happened so rarely, I fell hard for the sound. The way it reached it his eyes, the way his mouth spread. Damon laughing was beautiful.

Until I felt it.

Beneath the amusement and the anger, the feeling that I'd felt through the bond was jealousy. I couldn't identify it because I'd honestly never felt it in that form. I mean sure I'd been petty jealous, but it was never to the extent of what I was feeling from Damon.

He let me snatch the painting away from him. "Jealous? Of what?"

I didn't have an answer. I knew it was there, though.

"Nothing." I said, deciding to move on. "Jonas is-"

"We'll get to that." Damon said. "Tell me why I'm jealous."

"Move on, Damon." I said, annoyance and something else I couldn't place battling inside of me.

"No really, I want to know." Damon said folding his arms and smirking. "Am I supposed to be jealous because he painted some shit I could've painted at four with my eyes closed, or am I supposed to be jealous someone else painted you?"

"Both." I said, defiance making the word come out hard. Throughout the whole thing, all I could think about was how had it gotten this far?

Damon stopped laughing and stared. "Oh really?"

"Really." I shot back.

"So tell me something?" Damon said. "How can I be jealous of something I'm better at? Keep in mind I've had years, decades even, to hone and perfect a craft that's evolved as much as society has. I've painted entire cities and civilizations and I gave his favorite fucking artists some pointers and I'm jealous?"

"Yeah, you are." I said. "You know, maybe you should try to bullshit someone who can't see through it, or feel it for that matter."

"The fuck did you say?"

"You heard me," I went on. "I don't know why you're jealous Damon. Maybe it is because Jeremy painted something or, even more, maybe it's because he painted it for me. But you are jealous."

"I told you to stay out of my head." Damon was glaring at me so hard I could feel my head sizzling.

"You always complain about me being in your head. Control your emotions sometimes, maybe it'd get better."

"You should be quiet now." He said.

"And if I don't?"

I was suddenly trapped between Damon and the wall. He was kissing me, unzipping my jeans and yanking them down around my thighs. It wasn't until his hand was inside of my panties, fingers massaging me in circles, that I lost all sense of everything.

"Let's make something clear," Damon whispered as his fingers did things I couldn't describe. "Jeremy Gilbert is so small on my scale of importance I wouldn't give a fuck if he lived or died. He painted you a pretty picture and I'm sure it made you feel all warm inside, but it didn't do anything close to what I'm doing to you now."

I was moaning and squeezing my thighs together. Damon was teasing me to the point of torture. He pretended like he was going to insert a finger, then slide his finger up my slit and repeat the motion over and over. I could hear the sound of my wetness as his fingers moved. I tried to keep from moaning, but they came out anyway.

The anger that radiated for him was still going strong, pouring into the both of us. Only this time I could see pictures. I saw the painting, myself, and Jeremy. I heard my voice as I said Alex's name and a picture of a younger guy with long dark hair. At the very end of, I saw Katherine and Stefan.

I saw Elena. The anger intensified.

"And as far as me being jealous over you? I would never be jealous over something I can have anytime I want, anyway I want." Damon's forehead was on mine now, eyes locked. His fingers were moving faster making me moan louder and move my hips as I chased my orgasm. Whether I caught up to the rhythm of his hand or he slowed down to match my hips, I didn't know, but everything had become one movement.

"You're just another girl, Bonnie," He whispered. "Means to an end. And if our brief time together deluded you into thinking you were anything to be jealous over, you'll forgive me. Won't you?"

Damon pulled his hand out of my panties right as I was about come apart, and stepped backwards.

For a second, there was nothing. Nothing but the sounds of my breathing and the life outside. There was only my breathing, the occasional rustle of leaves in a breeze, and the car that passed by. My neighbor was home. My other neighbor was walking their new dog. I heard someone checking their mailbox.

Damon had just done that to me.

Hurt flashed through me like lightning, striking all of Damon's emotions and snapping me back to mine. The anger that I'd felt, his anger, washed away. There was only hurt and humiliation as I stared down at my thighs with my underwear around them. I could feel nothing but the weight of his words as they replayed themselves over and over again in my head.

Everything he'd ever said to me, every time I over analyzed a situation between us or realized that maybe I'd gone too far with him was for nothing. All of the times we'd bickered or bantered or anything, it meant nothing. I'd put way more into this, into everything.

Just like I always did.

My vision blurred as I pulled my panties and jeans up, hands shaking as I buttoned them. I was trying to hold it together, but I wasn't winning the fight. I blinked furiously as I straightened my shirt and stood up correctly. I looked around my room, but I didn't see anything but him.

I could feel something in the bond, but I pulled my mental walls up so fast my head pounded a little. I envisioned gates and moats and chains and fences. I buried myself so deep inside of my mind that I couldn't find Damon if I wanted to. And he couldn't find me.

I'd make sure of it.

He blinked eyes narrowing. "What did you just do?"

I didn't say anything. I couldn't say anything. Everything I could think of to keep someone out was coming to mind. A dome, a door, a home, glass. All of it sprang to the front of my mind and isolated me more and more from Damon. For weeks, ever since that day we got back to Mystic Falls, it had been nothing but my fuck ups. I read his mind, my mental barriers weren't up, I talked too much, I never paid attention. All of it piled on top of how childish I was and how I never listened. All of it came rushing forward, every last single bit of it.

Damon looked like he was straining for something. "What did you do?"

A safe, a lock, a vault.

"Bonnie," he said my name.

A box, a cell, a jar.

"Bonnie listen to me."

Buried, hidden, locked away.

Further and further I drove myself, deeper and deeper I hid my mind. Damon was still very much my familiar, I could feel my magic twined with his energy, but he'd finally gotten the block he'd been looking for. I couldn't feel him. He couldn't feel me. Everything was strictly where it was supposed to be. Mentally, as far as I could feel, I was in this room all by myself.

"Look, Bonnie, I'm sor-"

"You can tell Stefan about Jonas." I said. "I'll tell Elena and the others."

I didn't sound like myself. I was bland, toneless, empty.

"Bonnie listen to me," He said stepping forward. " I don't-"

"Jonas won't try anything, at least not with Elena. She'll be fine. Alex and Jonas are my problem."

"Why can't I feel you?" he asked me.

"Please go now." I said.

Damon stepped forward and bumped into an invisible wall. I hadn't even remembered summoning it.

"Bonnie move this." He said. "Listen to me."

What more was there to listen to? He'd said everything he had to say. I didn't want to hear anymore.

As soon as I'd thought it, Damon's voice got smaller and smaller. He seemed to notice it too, because he took to beating on the wall that separated us. I could see him screaming on the other side, but I couldn't hear what he was saying. He was moving, but I couldn't tell you what he was doing. At first I thought I was having another breakdown, but when my phone made a sound in my pocket, I realized it was just Damon. I'd muted him.

I slid down the wall to the floor, arms at my sides.

Damon was about to scream my name again, I saw it when I looked up at him. The eye contact we made felt nothing like it did before. Now all I felt was stupid for ever thinking there was a connection. He would never feel anything for me, nothing more than what I could do for Elena. I'd seen her face in his mine, hers and Katherine's. They were the special ones, they were the ones who mattered.

I was just another girl.

Damon's looked behind him out of my bedroom door and, with one last look at me, sped out of my window. I could hear feet coming up the stairs, thudding into the hallway. I heard someone saying something, it was coming through the bubble I'd put myself in.

My father stepped inside of my room.

"I brought pizza!" he said cheerfully. "I even got pineapples like…"

He was across the room so fast, he rustled a few papers on my dresser. As soon as he grabbed me I sobbed. He was holding me close to him, burying my face into his shoulder, and I cried out everything. I should've never let myself believe in any of it. I should've never given into what I thought would be something more. He didn't like me, he never had. I was a distraction, means to an end. I clung to my father as he stroked my hair, I let the deep rumble of his voice soothe the hurt I was feeling.

He was safer than any barrier I could've made up.

A/N: Ooh, some of you are going to be pissed. And I love it! I took a break. After the last Author's Note and a couple of reviews, I kind of took some time off to evaluate some things. Let me say this. I love you guys, I really do. I encourage you all to read and review and talk to me because I'm super responsive and take all of your opinions into account. With that being said, I'm sorry if I made anyone feel like your opinion isn't valid or respected. I completely understand your comments about Jeremy and the love triangle and I get why people feel the way that they do. However, keep in mind that it's a Bonnie/Damon fanfiction. I wouldn't write this for Bonnie to suddenly end up with Jeremy then realize what she had with Damon. I like to think I'm not that typical and I respect you all enough to keep it Bamon. The only reason Jeremy is even an option is because I wanted what they had on the show to be somewhat translated here. And for other reasons that are approaching. Bonnie, despite what he does, is still very into Damon. I like my Bamon that way.

Also, we see a little of Damon's mean streak resurface here. His anger towards the situation there was enough to give drama to this chapter and keep Bamon from being completely perfect and, what I hope, totally in character. And, yes, Damon was JEALOUS of Jeremy's painting for Bonnie. If you remember Damon's POV I included that Damon was artist in his mortal life, somewhat. I love artists. My best friend is one and I find her to be utterly amazing. Damon's connection to Alex (I hope you guys like the character) will be revealed probably in the next chapter or two.

Last thing before I go. I'm mentally working on a couple of things. One will be a one shot (my first one) about Damon meeting Roman and how they've interacted over the years. The other one shot (I'm sketchy on this one) will be a Bonnie/Matt deal with nothing but one liners and sarcasm and bonding. The last thing, and the thing that'll probably de done before either of those, is my Teen Wolf fanfic with Lydia and Derek. LOVE THEM. I fucking adore Holland Roden and Tyler Hoechlin. So tell me what you guys think? I'm more than interested. Read, Review, REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW!